The Fat Positive Lounge

[nycfem]

Just a place to hang out, talk silly or serious, about fat or not about fat (and if it is about fat- with a fat positive politic*). Sometimes I really need a safe space to be with other fat people who have a side to them that feels healthiest in a fat positive space- whether we are talking fat politics or just goofing around knowing that we are with like-minded friend :). Oh, and of course you don't have to be fat to post here! It's about the politic, not the size!

*Hang out a bit on http://www.bigfatblog.com if you don't have an idea of what a safe, fat positive space looks/feels/sounds like. Please don't ask on the thread, because again, I'm creating this space specifically for an environment that is not debating fat positivity but for having some bonding with like-minded souls :)

[nycfem]

I recently read the book "Hungry" by Crystal Renn and highly recommend it! She writes about her journey to a highly successful modeling career, where she goes from being anorexic to being a plus-size model. After allowing herself to eat what she wants and not focus on what size she is, she has her biggest success! It's such an uplifting book, and she is so encouraging of women to allow their body to be whatever their natural size is. The writing style is down-to-earth and full of helpful advice for being one's best self. One quote that helped me even though it is obvious is, "You simply cannot look to the wider world for a perpetual stream of affirmation. It won't be there. And life is too short to hate yourself." No doubt!

[LeftWriteFemme]

I have to say that a new place that I have found it safe for fat friendliness and gay friendliness and women friendliness is The Graham Norton Show. I feel so relaxed when I watch, it's TV that improves my mood.


http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-4AM1MAYIggU/TbJTPno1cZI/AAAAAAAAdxs/sQOlJPiR5AA/s1600/ennifer%2BHudson%2Bis%2Breunited%2Bwith%2Bher%2BBa fta%2Baward%2Bon%2BThe%2BGraham%2BNorton%2BShow%2B %2B3.jpg

http://www.blogcdn.com/www.aoltv.com/media/2011/03/thegrahamnortonshow110320bradleycooper.jpg

http://i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2010/12/03/article-1335240-0C53E7C9000005DC-393_468x286.jpg

[sylvie]

*subscribing*

i so love the literature you suggest Jenn, as you know! ♥
and of course, i'm all over a thread with you in it & about fat positivity..

[aishah]

i love this thread so much! :) thank you for starting it.

some other links i like are:
http://www.kateharding.net/
http://www.fatnutritionist.com/
http://www.adipositivity.com/ (nsfw)
http://queerfatfemme.com/

[1QuirkyKiwi]

Great thread!

I have a handful of badges that I made years ago that say: “I’m a whole lotta Quirky and I’ve got a BIG Bum (and PROUD of it!)”. LOL!

When I lived in Glasgow, Scotland I was an Artists model for the Glasgow School of Art; there were quite a few of us BBWs who would model for the Life Drawing classes and some of us were trained Artists. Before that, I did Life drawings/paintings of BBWs who wanted a gift for their partners; I have my innate clumsiness to thank for this, lol! I dropped on of my drawings in the Art supply shop and the shop assistant admired it and asked if I did commissions.

I’ve been working on a hand embroidery of my luscious, sexy, fat self in various (tasteful) poses that one day (when I eventually get it finished….it’s on my ‘to do list’ mentioned in the Crafters UNITE thread, lol!) and will hang in the bedroom or bathroom….

I was going to get on with sorting out my hair accessories draw, only I’m too scared to throw any out ‘just in case I will want to wear them, again’, lol! I have my favourites, but, I have my moments when I want to wear something in my hair that’s different for a change….after all, a change is as good as a rest, right? LOL!

Soooo, this sensual fat Femme can’t decide what hair accessories to part with; or, even if I should part with them! ….It’s not like it’s a major dilemma or even the end of the world if I can’t decide; it’s that I have so many Alice bands, barrettes, scrunchies, and hair flowers, etc, etc, that I’m like a kid in a sweetie shop trying to decide.

When I’m at home I let my hair cascade over my luscious cuddles and curves….this usually results in me sitting on my hair and pinning myself to the Sofa, much to the amusement of others! LOL! I often sit with my hair pooled into my lap….it’s makes a great lap blanket, lol!

When I’m getting ready to go out in the mornings (evenings, too, but, that’s a whole other predicament, lol!), mostly I wear my hair in a plait with either my favourite hair flowers or tribal hair elastics and an Alice band or barrette that compliment my clothes for that day.

Hair accessories for me are what shoes are to most women, lol! ….You know what? I’m not going to even think about sorting through them all; I bought them because I like them (and I’m like a Magpie when I see them, lol!), so I’m just going to keep them in my draw and wear them when I want and add to the collection when I walk past the shop or section, lol!

[1QuirkyKiwi]

I have to say that a new place that I have found it safe for fat friendliness and gay friendliness and women friendliness is The Graham Norton Show. I feel so relaxed when I watch, it's TV that improves my mood.


http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-4AM1MAYIggU/TbJTPno1cZI/AAAAAAAAdxs/sQOlJPiR5AA/s1600/ennifer%2BHudson%2Bis%2Breunited%2Bwith%2Bher%2BBa fta%2Baward%2Bon%2BThe%2BGraham%2BNorton%2BShow%2B %2B3.jpg

http://www.blogcdn.com/www.aoltv.com/media/2011/03/thegrahamnortonshow110320bradleycooper.jpg

http://i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2010/12/03/article-1335240-0C53E7C9000005DC-393_468x286.jpg

I love watching Graham Norton when my friends record him for me....Bill Bailey, too.

I just had to swoon over KD in the first photo....*Sighs*

:cheesy:

[SugarFemme]

Ahhhhh...Home Sweet Home:)

[nycfem]

What is everyone up to this weekend?

[clay]

What is everyone up to this weekend?

Outrageously flirting, am I!! Cleaning apt. to get ready for BIG inspection Monday. Will ride down to the water later this weekend..and watch for the dolphins! YES they DO exist...grin!
Talking on the phone at some point...AND enjoying this delicious thread..and you, gorgeous one? love YOU mostest!

[imadiva]

This is AWESOME !! I am so positive about being A BIG SEXY GIRL !!!!!!!!!!!!! I think ATTITUDE is everything !!
My hips don't lie and neither do I !!!!!!!!

Thank you again !!

[Gráinne]

The most positive I've ever felt about my own body wasn't even when being sexual with someone. I was a life model in college, and it was a shock to see how sensuously the students sculpted or drew my body, compared to how I saw myself. It was a total kick.

I want to be healthy, it's true, and I don't want problems to creep in as I get older. But, having said that, if I'm curvy, that's what I am. Your attitude is far more important than your weight or the size of anything.

NYCfemBBW, when I met you at the Reunion, I didn't even notice size. I thought, "Wow, I love her hair!" :).

I recommend the book "Feel Good Naked" by Laure Redmond. It's not a diet, although it recommends healthy eating (both content and how we eat). It's much more about self-esteem from the inside out. That to me, is hot in anyone.

[LeftWriteFemme]

Ah well, this is a weekend of feeling miraculous, I had a health scare this time last week and today I am so much better it is making me giddy.
I have been juicing carrots and saving the pulp, so today I made carrot cake with brown rice flour and cooked some red beans and then made this crazy thing that I love ........Jello with beans, odd, I know.

I went to the post office today, mailed hideous birthday cards that I made for my parents, along with powdered peanut butter and some tree branch buttons for my mom and the last Harry Potter DVD. When I got to the post office a package arrived from my mom, it's a huge quilt that she made from fabric that was part of a bequest made to her. It is so beautiful and even more so because Mom's dying friend had thought of me and had given her this fabric and quilt pattern.

I'm sad that Whitney Houston died, she is my age, so scary what addiction does. I feel so fortunate to have gotten sober young and stayed sober, not everyone is so lucky, I am nothing but grateful, though my heart breaks for her family and fans.

well, I've rambled enough. Hope you all are having a great day!

Sherrie

[nycfem]

The thicker the cushion, the better the pushin' ;)


My hips don't lie and neither do I !!!!!!!!

[Leigh]

My new home, and started by a very dear friend too :D

[1QuirkyKiwi]

The most positive I've ever felt about my own body wasn't even when being sexual with someone. I was a life model in college, and it was a shock to see how sensuously the students sculpted or drew my body, compared to how I saw myself. It was a total kick.

I want to be healthy, it's true, and I don't want problems to creep in as I get older. But, having said that, if I'm curvy, that's what I am. Your attitude is far more important than your weight or the size of anything.

NYCfemBBW, when I met you at the Reunion, I didn't even notice size. I thought, "Wow, I love her hair!" :).

I recommend the book "Feel Good Naked" by Laure Redmond. It's not a diet, although it recommends healthy eating (both content and how we eat). It's much more about self-esteem from the inside out. That to me, is hot in anyone.


Seeing the Artwork of another of how they see us is truly eye-opening and inspiring! Even though I’m from a family BBWs and some BHM and had positive role models, there have been times when my body confidence has wobbled. I’ll always have cuddles and curves thanks to my genetics.

It’s funny (….not funny haha!) that all the BBWs I’ve known, many are fairly healthy eaters and do a lot of walking.

Yesterday, one of the blokes at the Disabled Arts Studio started dancing to the music that was playing….to say he was dancing like your Dad at a family Wedding was an understatement! LOL! He had his thumbs up in the air and said: “This music’s got a good beat!” I was struggling to breathe I was laughing so hard! LOL!

Today, K has seen me at my worst! She is handling me in a foul mood well and I’ve apologised to her and explained why I’m feeling like this. I always explain my bad moods and apologise that way people know where they stand (or sit if they are doing so, lol!).

It’s so sad when someone dies young….

[Gemme]

I went to a small Burlesque show last night and even though it was a typical 6th street Austin deal, with standing room only and the patrons being squished in the space like sardines, I absolutely loved it.

The women were all sizes and fantastical and lovely and they celebrated humor and sexiness and there was even one butch-femme type of number.

Loved it.

*I* felt sexy watching them being sexy on stage. Their confidence rained down on me like the glitter and confetti one of the girls shook out into the crowd.

These aren't from last night, but it's the same troupe:

Jdwh_pAwHSg
WEgF3rUTg6Y
tkZUlgnBoVU

[Soft*Silver]

I love this thread! Jen, a wonderful idea!

I havent been around much lately because I am busy opening a....wait for it.....

A plus size women's resale shop!

Oh yes indeedy! I have over 80 bags of clothes in my dining room (its massive the mountain it created!) and am picking up more bags tomorrow from 4 other people. I have people from NJ, Mass, Vt, Florida, and Texas sending me clothes for my shop! For free!

why free? Because as soon as they hear about my shop, they immediately feel "part of"..they want it to succeed because they want a place of their own! It is as much a social experience as well as a retail location!

My case worker at our Bureau of Vocational Rehabilitation and my advisor from our local small business dept of our university are working closely with me to develop a business plan, select a location, make purchases, etc. They have never seen an automatic flood of donations to a business that is not a non profit, before in their lives!

I feel alive again. I feel like I am giving back once more. And I feel wanted. I get messages and emails every day from women locally and across the US who are hearing it from friends of friends. Some tell me their life story of how hard it was and still is to be a plus size. I share my own story, of the internal damage and how I had a life threatening eating disorder in my 20s because I wanted to be the "desired image", only to be sexually assaulted after obtaining that goal. When you objectify yourself, your obsession takes so much out of you. I have been very comfortable ever since then, about my weight. Even after my surgery on my stumach, and having lost weight, I will never be a size 8. I am always going to be a size 16 because thats where I feel the most comfortable. I realized it as soon as my weight dipped to 14. I was trying too hard to lose the weight the Drs expected me to lose. I am perfectly happy at 16. Then again, I was happy at size 22 too, but my body hurt with my conditions, from the extra weight.

So here I am, opening up this store and hearing everyone's life story. How sad it is that there is very little difference between the 64 year old telling me her story of growing up fat, and the 16 year old who is in the process of it. A couple have told me they never knew a single person who could say they were comfortable with weight, before they met me.

this little shop of mine is going to be "home" too. My case worker and advisor suggested for me to only sell online and give up the idea of a store front. I refused. This store is important to too many women. and to me. I am going to be doing monthly get togethers too, so we can meet and look at each other and see the beauty in all our shapes and sizes. I want to do a fashion show for a charity but right now, no one wants to do it except one woman. Give me time. They will sign up.

My shops name is The Pretty and Plus Shop. I hope you dont mind me talking about it in here. I am not trying to drum up business. I simply want to share this phenomena of the reaction I am getting!

[Martina]

http://redcfa.wpengine.netdna-cdn.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/Adele-Armani-2012-Grammys.jpg
http://forthoseabouttoshop.ca/wp-content/uploads/2011/06/eIVLh.jpg

[The_Lady_Snow]

http://redcfa.wpengine.netdna-cdn.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/Adele-Armani-2012-Grammys.jpg
http://forthoseabouttoshop.ca/wp-content/uploads/2011/06/eIVLh.jpg



She's AMAzing sexy and sassy and humble, she's easy to like and love!

This thread is great and so full of warm & fuzzy it's nice thanks Jennifer!

[Toughy]

Have you seen her Vogue (I think it's Vogue) pictorial...........they really photo-shopped her.........
edited to add: I think the grammy picture above is photo-shopped

[Mtn]

Have you seen her Vogue (I think it's Vogue) pictorial...........they really photo-shopped her.........
edited to add: I think the grammy picture above is photo-shopped

HUH?.......

[Toughy]

Adele is the cover for Vogue............

here.........what do you think:

https://www.google.com/search?q=adele+vogue&hl=en&prmd=imvnsu&tbm=isch&tbo=u&source=univ&sa=X&ei=l_Y5T8rLDfHViAKvudySDA&ved=0CEcQsAQ&biw=1138&bih=544

[Soft*Silver]

I met the most interesting woman today when i went to pick up some clothes she was donating to the TPAPS shop. Wild hair like fire and it reminded me of Medusa, (the greek legend, not just our site owner!) flaming out in stiff red and black vibrant curls all around her beautiful heart shaped face. Her grey eyeliner stroked easily over her soft grey eyes gave them a wolf look, a soothingly calm wildlife look that contrasted with her flaming riot of hair. Her lips were thin and red but stretched wide in embracing smiles to my spirit. Damn it was wonderful to be in her presence and to be gifted with her clothes. And oh what clothes they were! All in red and black and as wild as she is! But sweet and with an inner peace. I am still reeling with her contrasts!

When i got home and went thru her clothes, my hands slid over them and I thanked my goddesses for bringing me to these women, so I can share with them and them with me. I feel all warm and fuzzy inside when i think of her smile flashing at me as I left....I could feel how happy I made her by simply alllowing her to help other women feel good about themselves thru shared clothes. But its not just clothes. Its shared acceptance of our body images.

She is my wild fire medusa...and I just had to share her with you all tonight...

[Martina]

http://media4.onsugar.com/files/2012/02/07/1/192/1922398/adele.preview/i/Adele-Vogue-2012-Pictures.jpg

It's kinda hard to tell. She doesn't take a lot of full figure photos where you can see the outline of her body, but yes, her waist looks smaller than i would imagine it is.

Here is a fairly recent photo though that i imagine isn't photoshopped. It's not that different from the grammy pic.

http://cdn.sheknows.com/articles/2012/02/adele-voice-vogue.jpg

[Martina]

These are yummy. i think she looks better when they allow her to look fleshy.

http://www.popcrunch.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/02/adele-500x725.jpg

http://culturepop.me/wp-content/uploads/2011/09/adele-vogue-october-2011-uk-issue-3.jpeg

[Soft*Silver]

she is so stunning...I can feel the plumpness in my grasp, and how incredibly sexy that is. I dont see size, I FEEL lust....

[Soft*Silver]

I have been asked to present a talk at a brown bag luncheon for professional women, about my new shop opening up! I cant wait to talk to them about the store, and the whole concept of body image and how women emotionally identify with their physical selves, in such a negative way that we often disassociate from our spiritual Selves.

This is hopefully the first talk of many. I am the Fat Girl Ambassador of my little valley.

I am going to have my first auction on my FB site for the shop this Sunday. I am really hoping it goes well. I need the money to buy some racks for the shop.

Can I ask who and what are your favorite lines of clothing? I know Avenue fits me so well...Lane Bryant doesnt do a thing for me.

[1QuirkyKiwi]

I have been asked to present a talk at a brown bag luncheon for professional women, about my new shop opening up! I cant wait to talk to them about the store, and the whole concept of body image and how women emotionally identify with their physical selves, in such a negative way that we often disassociate from our spiritual Selves.

This is hopefully the first talk of many. I am the Fat Girl Ambassador of my little valley.

I am going to have my first auction on my FB site for the shop this Sunday. I am really hoping it goes well. I need the money to buy some racks for the shop.

Can I ask who and what are your favorite lines of clothing? I know Avenue fits me so well...Lane Bryant doesnt do a thing for me.

I have had a hard time getting trousers to fit; if a pair fit me over the thighs, hips and belly, then the waist is far too big (I’ve an hour glass figure with very wide hips). I’ve no chance getting a pair to the other way round, lol! Since my early teens I’ve made my own clothes to fit (drawstring waist).

I go for Linen Palazzo slacks with a peasant style blouse. Some of my blouses are dressier than others; I’ve made something for almost all occasions, lol!

Good luck with your talk and auction!

[nycfem]

That's so exciting, Miss Tia! I'm loving hearing about this! There was a store like that in New York, Brooklyn to be specific. It was open for a few years and then closed. Maybe New York rents are just too expensive. Thanks for keeping us in the loop about your store. Keep the stories coming! What an adventure!

[MsTinkerbelly]

Adele is the cover for Vogue............

here.........what do you think:

https://www.google.com/search?q=adele+vogue&hl=en&prmd=imvnsu&tbm=isch&tbo=u&source=univ&sa=X&ei=l_Y5T8rLDfHViAKvudySDA&ved=0CEcQsAQ&biw=1138&bih=544

At the Grammy's she looked slimmer in the second dress she wore, but these photos all look photo shopped! That is a shame, because she is a normal size woman and they are really sending the wrong message to young women.

[Licious]

thank you for starting this thread. subscribing :bow:

[Soft*Silver]

I secured my store site today! Its on the MAIN corner of the downtown area of the town next to mine. It is catty corner to two very popular and busy restaurants and is in an 100 year old building with high ceilings that have those precious molded forms! The landlord's last tenant destroyed the place so he has to repair and remodel it. He is now doing it to my specifications! It has a HUGE store window front! I was quivering how excited I was!

When i got home i had an email from a gal who said she hated herself. She gained 100 lbs since she was married. She only wore sweats and felt like a worthless unlovable being. Yet her husband adores her. She was so glad there was going to be a shop where she could go and not feel bad about herself when trying to buy clothes. She is exactly why i want to do this store. I saw photos of her and she is STUNNING. I am not kidding you! As beautiful as they come, could be a plus size model! And she hates herself.
Mirror mirror on the wall, why do I see someone I dont like at all?

[Licious]

I secured my store site today! Its on the MAIN corner of the downtown area of the town next to mine. It is catty corner to two very popular and busy restaurants and is in an 100 year old building with high ceilings that have those precious molded forms! The landlord's last tenant destroyed the place so he has to repair and remodel it. He is now doing it to my specifications! It has a HUGE store window front! I was quivering how excited I was!

When i got home i had an email from a gal who said she hated herself. She gained 100 lbs since she was married. She only wore sweats and felt like a worthless unlovable being. Yet her husband adores her. She was so glad there was going to be a shop where she could go and not feel bad about herself when trying to buy clothes. She is exactly why i want to do this store. I saw photos of her and she is STUNNING. I am not kidding you! As beautiful as they come, could be a plus size model! And she hates herself.
Mirror mirror on the wall, why do I see someone I dont like at all?


This is great news! I am happy to read it, and so glad you can provide pretty clothes to nice, larger, pretty ladies. :) :bow:

[oblivia]

Just wanted to send out a big ol squishy hug to nycfembbw for starting this thread!! :)

I subscribed. Love myself some fat-positivity!!

[Soft*Silver]

and never wear stripes, esp horizontal ones

prints are bad.

so are loud colors

dont draw attention to yourself

keep your hair short and off your face. You have such a pretty face

smile....fat people are jolly

eat before you go out so you wont eat alot when you do go out

no one wants to see a fat person clean their plate publicly

be obsessed with your hygiene because ya know, we smell

control top pantyhose was invented by a baker..for it creates muffin tops

which by the way, are anything but slimming....

[Soft*Silver]

I dont listen to any of the above...anymore...lol...thank goddess!

[nycfem]

There are certain words or phrases that I find oppressive and fat-negative. They are words that I may nod along with but am cringing inside. They are words that I even use at times when talking to people because I know it's their language. Here's my list. Do you have a list of words or phrases that you find to be fat negative?

1) "Overweight." Over WHAT weight? Some ideal determined by insurance companies and patriarchal doctors?

2) "War on Obesity." This is so literally negative and easily morphs into "war on fat people." How about something positive, especially for a phrase that is so often applied to children, like, "Team for Healthiness."

3) "Obese" and "Morbidly obese." When I hear these words, I immediately think of how cold and clinical they are. They are never a compliment, and that says a lot.

And how about fat positive words that we love hearing? Here's my list, and I'd love to know yours:

1) fat (direct, can be used negatively but also down-to-earth)

2) full-figured (feels direct and respectful- of course, as all fat phrases in our culture, can be used negatively)

3) voluptuous (sensual, complimentary, a "feel good" word)

[Gemme]

Rubenesque!!!!!

[Soft*Silver]

many of the women who I am coming in contact with this store, are not advocates for their size. They are blown away by my self acceptance and many flat out loathe themselves. If I used the word fat, I would lose them as customers. But ...I also know, like any change, it needs to be done or the word will continue to hurt them. Its one of those topics I want to do during one of my workshops/get togethers...The Power of Words.

Lots of people are using Curvy. Luscious plushious is a fav saying of mine. Hell, most of my customers cant see themselves as sexy. Some dont want to. Others do. (Lots to sift thru with that)

I dont call myself full figured because I always related that to someone with a fuller bustline, which I dont have. Not that I mind! I dont have the backaches like some of my full figured friends and relatives have!

I use the word overweight and dont feel guilty about it. Its what I was raised with as the polite word to use. It feels good to me and well, I am me and I use whats good for me, as long as I dont hurt anyone in the process of it.

[Soft*Silver]

recently I posted a sexy photo of a plus sized woman in red fishnets and red heels. One of my customers posted "ewww"....

wow, was i slapped in the face with her reality! She doesnt see herself as sexy at all, nor does she see sexy in any plus woman!

shocking to me..this is giving me quite the education! I am going to hold a plus size photo contest locally and one of the categories will be "Sexy"...I cant wait for the reactions, photos, etc!

[Licious]

I have struggled with weight issues most of my life. I am not prone to being thin, though less heavy some times than others. And I have that issue of not feeling so lovely when I am larger. :( Oddly, I see other large femmes as lovely and large butches as handsome, just hard on myself when have extra weight. I came here because I like the positivity and appreciate the thread. Thank you. :bow:

[Licious]

Excuse the double post. I wanted to say, last night I was checking out of CVS and two nice gay boys behind me in line, and saw them buying Vogue and saw Adele on the cover. How great is that! She's so purdy! :)

[LeftWriteFemme]

Excuse the double post. I wanted to say, last night I was checking out of CVS and two nice gay boys behind me in line, and saw them buying Vogue and saw Adele on the cover. How great is that! She's so purdy! :)



I just couldn't resist posting this. If you watch to the end she talks about flashing a whole bunch of folks on the street.....very funny, I love how relaxed and herself she is!

dOojCvo_luo

[Gemme]

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/02/22/my-fat-beautiful-body_n_1294915.html?ref=women&icid=maing-grid7%7Cmain5%7Cdl14%7Csec1_lnk3%26pLid%3D138248

Without fail at noon on every Friday, 30 minutes before my beginning ballet class starts, a mixture of fear and dread ooze into my mind. It starts when I think of getting dressed for class. Despite a well-stocked closet, I am never content with my choices. I spend 20 minutes scouring my closet for a garment that doesn't exist - I am looking for something that will make me invincible. Exasperated, I leave wearing the same men's gym shorts and oversized t-shirt. My nerves don't get any better once I get to class. I am scared to look at my body in a mirror; I am scared to compare my body to my peers. I try to stand in the back rows as far away from the mirrors as possible, and I still occasionally catch a glimpse of my double chin. Or my belly escaping the drapery of my shirt. I am scared that even after working at accepting my body and fighting tooth and nail to get those around me to change their actions and opinions, I will see something repulsive. I can't get through a weekly dance class without having to give myself pep talks. It takes all that I can muster to remind myself that I am beautiful and, more importantly, worthy of being in that class. It takes all that I have to remind myself that I love my body and that I can take pleasure in moving it. I can take pleasure and find beauty in my body.

I loathe classifying these problems (yes, I acknowledge that they're problems) as "body image" problems. "Body image" isn't really about the image of bodies. It's about the holistic relationships we have with our bodies. It's about how bodies look, how they move, what they feel like, and how we treat them. Even if we ignore semantics, conversations about body image almost always come down to health. Most conversations I've had about body image blame the media and advertising for exposing young girls to impossible standards in order to sell products. But more than selling products, these images drive people to unhealthy habits - crash diets, disordered eating, and sometimes even more dramatic actions like diet pills and self-harm.

And yet many of these behaviors have been recommended to me by health professionals. You see, I'm fat. Not "does this dress make me look fat?" fat, but eligible-for-weight-loss-surgery morbidly obese deathfat. I've been fat for as long as I can remember, but the first time I remember my size being an issue was at a check-up. I was 8 years old, and after plotting my height and weight in one of those grids, my pediatrician had one of those "talks" with my parents and me. I was too heavy for my height and age, so he presented me with a Xeroxed list of 10 "helpful tips" for eating.

It was meant to be innocuous, but I became obsessed with that sheet of paper. It was the first time I saw my body as a personal failing, and that list was the way to redeem myself. I followed the rules to a tee, and yet I didn't get any smaller. That simple piece of paper was only the beginning. My adolescence was filled with appointments with doctors and nutritionists, medically facilitated crash diets, and crying fits in dressing rooms. My doctors pathologized my body, and I believed them. I believed that my fat body meant that I was overeating, even when I would leave the dinner table hungry. I believed that I was lazy, unkempt, untrustworthy. I couldn't trust myself.

I can't rely on a conventional understanding of health to fix my body image issues because my body image issues stem from those conventional understandings of health. To find peace with my body I've had to reject mainstream medical wisdom. I screen my health care professionals, and I set firm boundaries. I am not interested in weight loss, and I will not step on a scale. I don't care about a new diet regimen; I care about eating. I've learned to love my body - I love the look of my body; I love the way my squishy, soft flesh feels. I have embraced my fat. I do this because I care about my body. I care less about the image of my body, and I care more about my relationship to my body.

When I stand at the barre to begin my weekly ballet class, I am reminded that loving my body is both difficult and important. As we go through the usual warm-up routine I feel my muscles stretch and flex. I am present in my body, and I appreciate the grace and flow of movements. As we transition into leaps and jumps, I am reminded of that power in my body. My hearty legs can push my body in the air again and again in rapid succession. I land easily each time.

I am still scared that even after working to accept my body I will catch a glimpse of myself in the mirror and find something ugly. So far, I've only seen my body. My fat, beautiful body.


When Jenn Leyva was 16, her dad told her that he'd buy her a car if she lost weight. She cried, finished her calculus homework, and is now a New York based fat activist and a senior at Columbia studying biochemistry. She authors Fat and the Ivy, a fat blog about social justice, feminism, science, health, and fa(t)shion.

[LeftWriteFemme]

KSMgTcj1dE4



lAgiAtqdNz8&feature=relmfu




Just love Dawn French!.......and Cher!

[Leigh]

I am slowly learning to not only love my body, but everything about it no matter how much weight I may have on me right now (and how much I may/will lose in the future). This is the only body I will ever have and even if I lose weight, the fact is still that I will have this body forever and I have to take care of it no matter how big (or small) I am!

[nycfem]

I was with my thin gay male sign language tutor today* and we were doing an exercise with verbs. So we got to "don't want," and he signed, "I don't want to be fat." We did the exercise about a month ago and he said the same thing last time, after struggling to think of anything else! What a shame that it is people's worst fear, and that even when speaking with a fat woman, he couldn't come up with one other thing that he doesn't want in life!


*I work at a school for deaf children.

[Leigh]

I have to admit it is pretty sad when someone's worst fear is being fat, there much worse things in this world then that but as we all see by society they make it out to be one of (if not *the*) worst thing in the world and its not

[Gemme]

I was with my thin gay male sign language tutor today* and we were doing an exercise with verbs. So we got to "don't want," and he signed, "I don't want to be fat." We did the exercise about a month ago and he said the same thing last time, after struggling to think of anything else! What a shame that it is people's worst fear, and that even when speaking with a fat woman, he couldn't come up with one other thing that he doesn't want in life!


*I work at a school for deaf children.

How about:

I don't want pizza for dinner.

I don't want to go to the movies.

I don't want to get diabetes/cancer/gingivitis/pick a condition.

I don't want to do my homework.

That makes me a bit sad that that's all he could come up with.

[nycfem]

Sadly, a lot of people don't know why saying this stuff is problematic and just how much we hear it!

Shit people say to fat people:

Part 1
Shit You Say to Fat People (Part 1) - YouTube

Part 2
Shit You Say to Fat People (Part 2) - YouTube


What lines hit home most for you and what lines would you add?

[nycfem]

Today on the train there was a man talking to himself and holding something that looked like a crowbar, which, is not too unusual on the nyc subways. When I got up to get off the train, he yelled at me, "Die, you fat girl!" Of course, everyone looked at me, and I saw a little boy say to his mom, "That's kinda mean, right?" (a cute, sweet response). When I got off, I thought about how most of what the man had been saying had been gibberish and yet he still knew to zero in on my fat! It made me feel self-conscious, and I even wondered whether my puffy coat was just adding too much puff to me (but its so warm!). These little things that go on in a fat girl's daily life add up to make me feel fierce about needing some fat positivity. Anyone feeling me out there?

[clay]

hey my sweet and gorgeous friend!!!! His brain was probably fried on drugs and/or alcohol...and being he is an unknown entity..he had NO CLUE just what a truly beautiful soul he was choosing to diss on...and since he is an anonymity anyway his opinion doesn't bear weight.....
I do feel how it probably does hurt...BUT in the long run...one or two small and narrow minded people in this huge world matters NOT! What does matter is that gorgeous smile of yours...the truly huge heart of yours, and that delicious woman you are! I mean every bit of this with the utmost respect, both to you, and to BB!
So, next time someone says something mean..let that huge heart of yours beat proudly, flash one of those killer smiles, and flip your hair back and say why thank YOU for realizing, and validating I AM a truly gorgeous woman!!! and shake every ounce of your beauty as you walk away!!! I heart you beautiful!!! YUMMMMMM

[Spirit Dancer]

http://i5.photobucket.com/albums/y196/njneere/Greetings/beautiful-you.jpg

[Spirit Dancer]

Her swagger is a beauty of untold dimensions
She holds her head high, walks tall and proud
Her swagger draws attention for the confidence she exudes
Who you ask is that beauty? Why that beauty is you!
RG©

[stonebutchinpa]

http://redcfa.wpengine.netdna-cdn.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/Adele-Armani-2012-Grammys.jpg
http://forthoseabouttoshop.ca/wp-content/uploads/2011/06/eIVLh.jpg

I LOVE Adele! I think she is gorgeous and stunning. She has such a wonderful attitude about herself. She is incredibly beautiful inside and out. :cheer:

This butch would fling hymself on stage just to get to her...or better yet swim to England to get close to her lol

[1QuirkyKiwi]

I LOVE Adele! I think she is gorgeous and stunning. She has such a wonderful attitude about herself. She is incredibly beautiful inside and out. :cheer:

This butch would fling hymself on stage just to get to her...or better yet swim to England to get close to her lol

If you swim across to the UK, please don'y bring the snow! Please and Thank you! :cheesy:

[1QuirkyKiwi]

Today on the train there was a man talking to himself and holding something that looked like a crowbar, which, is not too unusual on the nyc subways. When I got up to get off the train, he yelled at me, "Die, you fat girl!" Of course, everyone looked at me, and I saw a little boy say to his mom, "That's kinda mean, right?" (a cute, sweet response). When I got off, I thought about how most of what the man had been saying had been gibberish and yet he still knew to zero in on my fat! It made me feel self-conscious, and I even wondered whether my puffy coat was just adding too much puff to me (but its so warm!). These little things that go on in a fat girl's daily life add up to make me feel fierce about needing some fat positivity. Anyone feeling me out there?

hey my sweet and gorgeous friend!!!! His brain was probably fried on drugs and/or alcohol...and being he is an unknown entity..he had NO CLUE just what a truly beautiful soul he was choosing to diss on...and since he is an anonymity anyway his opinion doesn't bear weight.....
I do feel how it probably does hurt...BUT in the long run...one or two small and narrow minded people in this huge world matters NOT! What does matter is that gorgeous smile of yours...the truly huge heart of yours, and that delicious woman you are! I mean every bit of this with the utmost respect, both to you, and to BB!
So, next time someone says something mean..let that huge heart of yours beat proudly, flash one of those killer smiles, and flip your hair back and say why thank YOU for realizing, and validating I AM a truly gorgeous woman!!! and shake every ounce of your beauty as you walk away!!! I heart you beautiful!!! YUMMMMMM

I agree with Clay on this! There are days when even the most confident, self assured, carefree spirit has moments of weaknesses.

Are they that insecure that they must project their feelings and anxieties onto others?

[deedarino]

What is it exactly, this thing ugly?
I see you hide your eyes
For a moment I believe while I nurse my wounds
Soon the illusion will fade and the truth is evident
Ugliness resides in the heart,
From this you cannot hide.

[LeftWriteFemme]

etrJgiWJnMg


My plan was to post something with KD Lang, to help put a smile on nycfembbw's face, (I don't know that KD makes her smile, but she makes me smile....) while I was watching it I realized that Graham in a very quiet way teased Jennifer Hudson about her 80 pound weight loss, I found it interesting and thought you might find it interesting too.

[LeftWriteFemme]

Oh, my Fucking Whatnot.......here is part 1......having posted part 2 above and here in part 1 is all the stupid things people say to folks about their weight, so damned depressing

QZtI0DB9XTc

[nycfem]

The Biggest Loser

http://www.womanist-musings.com/2010/05/jillian-michaels-knows-what-fat-is-all.html

[LeftWriteFemme]

That's a great blog, thanks for posting it. I often wonder what makes people so angry and or frightened of fat, I wonder this same thing about why gay is so frightening and or anger producing......seems strange, neither of these things is catching if you know what I mean!

Strangely it puts me in mind of this bit of satire....

bUhLIjlTNSk

[Leigh]

Its truly amazing how people think that being fat is like one of the worst things ever ~ I can think of things WAY worse than having some extra meat on their bones *shakes head*

[1QuirkyKiwi]

Beauty and comfort within one's own skin does not come from a gym, a perfect hair day or mimicking models from fashion magazines..... It comes from inside and it is a constantly changing vision. I wake up in the morning, feeling sexy and sensuous. It feels ecstatically satisfying wiggling and sashaying my soft, plentiful, desirable curves. My more than attractive ample, full, soft, sensuous, voluptuously feminine body yearning to be caressed, squeezed, adored and worshipped.

Ideals in western culture are ridiculous, unattainable and very sad; impossibly svelte women whose skin appears to have been shrink-wrapped to their bones. These women appear to live a life where food cannot be enjoyed, made reachable, and that is not normal or healthy. They have to be underweight and famished. Aren't there enough people starving in the world? So why deliberately encourage this?

It’s time to enjoy our fuller figures again! It’s time to enjoy all figures and shapes. Let's honour, worship and enjoy womanhood, softness and roundness. A woman totally squashes her personality with the preoccupation of her weight; it's become an issue. A negative one!

There is a biological reason why women are supposed to have fuller figures. The female hormones cause fat to be stored on the hips, breasts, belly, bum and thighs; this acts as a protective measure in ensuring that there are enough reserves to continue nursing a child during lean times. Our bodies haven’t adapted to an abundance of food that we have today.

The fashion for thinness tends to be a phenomenon of modern-day Western society, although there has been a recent trend for women to under go cosmetic surgery to have buttock-implants, breast implants and calf implants thereby emulating a curvy figure; all of which nature has already provided.

[nycfem]

http://media-cdn.pinterest.com/upload/116952921542814034_YntyORam_b.jpg

[1QuirkyKiwi]

Beauty and comfort within one's own skin does not come from a gym, a perfect hair day or mimicking models from fashion magazines..... It comes from inside and it is a constantly changing vision. I wake up in the morning, feeling sexy and sensuous. It feels ecstatically satisfying wiggling and sashaying my soft, plentiful, desirable curves. My more than attractive ample, full, soft, sensuous, voluptuously feminine body yearning to be caressed, squeezed, adored and worshipped.

Ideals in western culture are ridiculous, unattainable and very sad; impossibly svelte women whose skin appears to have been shrink-wrapped to their bones. These women appear to live a life where food cannot be enjoyed, made reachable, and that is not normal or healthy. They have to be underweight and famished. Aren't there enough people starving in the world? So why deliberately encourage this?

It’s time to enjoy our fuller figures again! It’s time to enjoy all figures and shapes. Let's honour, worship and enjoy womanhood, softness and roundness. A woman totally squashes her personality with the preoccupation of her weight; it's become an issue. A negative one!

There is a biological reason why women are supposed to have fuller figures. The female hormones cause fat to be stored on the hips, breasts, belly, bum and thighs; this acts as a protective measure in ensuring that there are enough reserves to continue nursing a child during lean times. Our bodies haven’t adapted to an abundance of food that we have today.

The fashion for thinness tends to be a phenomenon of modern-day Western society, although there has been a recent trend for women to under go cosmetic surgery to have buttock-implants, breast implants and calf implants thereby emulating a curvy figure; all of which nature has already provided.




***This was part of an article I'd written about 5 or 6 years ago for an online BBW magazine. Here's another exert from that article...

In Te reo Maori the word Puku means; belly, uterus/womb. Kopu means womb wisdom, belly laughs, gut feelings, and pelvic power. For women embracing the centre of their bodies and celebrating the wisdom of their feminine nature. Embracing the wisdom from ancient cultures and our fore Mothers of ages ago.

Voluptuous, curvy BBWs in tropical countries are regarded as feminine, fertile, desirable and sexy to name a few qualities. In Polynesian, African and some Asian cultures, round bellies are a more sexually desirable attribute than big breasts. In recent years the excessive pursuit of western fashions for small female body size may have longer term detrimental effects in Polynesian and African women.

The Japanese say: "Hara de kangaenasai." Which literally translates as: “Please think with your belly.” In the west the phrase is: “Trust your gut.” Hara; gut, belly: Whether we’re speaking English or Japanese, the body’s centre is home to our centre of being. It’s the oracle already situated inside us. A woman's belly is sexy! A woman's belly in the morning light is sexier!

The Laughing Buddha is based on a wandering Chinese monk, Budai (Hotei, in Japanese) who lived centuries ago and was believed to be the “Buddha to come”. The statue’s plump figure has been described to suggest contentment, magnanimity and plenitude. Folklore has it that rubbing his pot belly brings good fortune and wealth.
But he’s more than just a good luck charm favoured by Chinese restaurateurs and businessmen. The Laughing Buddha’s big belly is a symbol of tolerance; also, that prosperity and wealth can go hand-in-hand with enlightened awareness.

[Soft*Silver]

oh my gracious! I SO want to do this on the wall of my store!


http://i5.photobucket.com/albums/y196/njneere/Greetings/beautiful-you.jpg

[Soft*Silver]

I have been rather busy putting the store together. Today a shipment of shoes came in that are to DIE for. I had posted some of them on the web and actually were asked by a few of my thinner friends if they were reserved only for the "fatties" because they were so pretty. Really? You calling my customers and me "fatties"?

I am not amused by how people are feeling adventurous in the use of slang terms for fat around me. Its like they have been given permission to use words maybe they always thought but never dared to say out loud in front of me. And they say it with an activist twist but a prejudist smirk. I did not give them permission to have fun saying "naughties".

I have to literally hold my breath in to keep myself from reacting. I count..one, two, three, four, five....then i respond with "still not acceptable, try a different tone or word".

[Soft*Silver]

Even tho I have lost alot of weight, I am still overweight by standards of the Cultural Norm. However, this is exactly where my body feels the most at ease and normal. So this is where I want to stay. I am somewhere between a 16 and an 18.

I have been told my surgery was a failure because I didnt get skinny.

even tho my surgery was NOT for weight loss, but to correct a life threatening hernia that compromised my lungs and my heart.

I can breath and I have much more stamina now and I am not getting chest pains and even my back issues are better because my body is not exhausted. I sleep better, and no longer have hallucinations (usually, lol) when i sleep. So...

my surgery was a failure?

[Soft*Silver]

My store opens May 1st. I have purchased my racks, all my ticket guns, registers, signages, etc. Well, BVR has and I have kicked in as much as I can. (Bureau of Vocational Rehab).

An extraordinary thing is happening. I am able to pick up the smaller store next to me. I am considering putting in a men's resale shop.

Immediately I am asked if its going to be for pudgy men. (I told you, i am hearing ALL the damn words)

I havent decided yet but I know I will carry larger clothes for men. My sub is a larger man. WAY larger. So yes, I will.

I get giggles over that. People have said they want to come and sit so they can see the customers come in.

Seriously?

Good lord, I had no idea what lurked in people's minds! I am seeing people that I thought I knew, in whole other lights! I will say most of the people saying these things are not close friends of mine but more acquaintances. But still, my one eyebrow goes up and my mouth twists sideways and i feel like a momma about to scold her bad child, when I hear shit like this...

[Soft*Silver]

I was going to do a modeling event, with several women wearing clothes from my shop. However, I had to cancel that because I am able to move my fixtures and the clothing into the store that week. It will be chaos. And i wont have the energy nor the focus to do both.

But while I was looking for models, I had people turn me down because they were not ok having people look at their bodies. It made me realize it wasnt the clothes that they thought were going to be featured, but their size.

In runways, models are suppose to be invisible, literally human hangers for the fashion.

but my models were saying THEY were the focus, and not the fashion.

Interesting...

and painful...

[Soft*Silver]

I hope I am allowed to do this..if not, please just delete this post. I dont want to break policy but I was hoping to offer my FB page for the store to those on BFP.

http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100003486122806

[LeftWriteFemme]

nFwgEevvncs

[Soft*Silver]

I started bringing fixtures into the store. And a cash register. And signage. And mannequins. Oh lord. It is now REAL.

Did i get a chance to measure? No. Too much happening at one time today for me to concentrate on measuring a wall. I feel like my head is going to explode, how different this reality is.

I am really lucky to have so many people supporting me in this adventure. The woman i got the fixtures from is giving them to me to use before I pay for them! BVR will cut her a check but rather than wait for it, she said to just take them. This allows me to get the place started months before it would if I had to wait for BVR gov to process stuff.

I am sitting in the dark in rose cottage, feeling content, watching the light disappear outside while I type out words to people across the world. Life is good...

[Soft*Silver]

I am about to head out to get more fixtures, two more loads for sure. Thank heavens the dually truck bed is huge!

My house is so tore up..clothes, boxes, packaging materials, candles, signages, vases, etc all over the place for the store. I am feeling pretty overwhelmed that my house will never be cleaned again. I am one of those people that has to have things in their place and nothing is in it and there are many things in here now that dont have a place! LOL

I am setting up a web page soon too. I will be listing my inventory piece by piece and offering them for sale so people long distance can buy as well. And, take part in our online events. I plan on hosting some pretty incredible events with speakers and activities. Time to get the gals together! I also have a blogger who is going to be posting called "Chubby Girl". I love her wit and sense of self! And people are also gonna be able to purchase either steam punk or moody romantic jewelry from me, from two incredible local artists!

Am I still the same girl who was curled up on the couch last year and feeling like I would never have a purpose again?

I have to share with you, that there was one person on BFP that never left my side, never gave up on me, always stayed close and always believed in me. Without his help, i dont know what I would have done. I love him so much,and always will. Our friendship is as deep and rich as any i have ever had in my life. Imma gonna put a cowboy hat in a doorway so he can always be part of the blessings of my new store...

[1QuirkyKiwi]

LOVING A BIG BEAUTIFUL WOMAN


I won't ever be ashamed to be seen with you.

I won't ever be embarrassed by your size.

I won't ever hide you away out of sight.

I won't ever find you unattractive at any weight.

I won't ever find you unattractive or anything less than sexy.

I won't ever allow others to put you down.

I won't ever tolerate you putting yourself down.

I won't ever take you where you can't be accommodated.

I won't ever let anyone show you disrespect.

I won't ever let a day go by without telling you how beautiful, loved and special you are.

[istolurboxers38]

I love this thread. I am just now really learning to really love being comfortable in my own skin. I just recently joined a gym with my kids and we play raquetball and lift weights. It is really cool they support me and help me out in keeping track of the weights I lift so I can see the progress. I like being fluffy there is more of me to love

[Leigh]

I miss coming to this thread, I'm a big girl and damn proud of it too ......... my new attitude is take me as i am or don't take me at all :)

[nycfem]

That's great that you are learning to love being comfortable in your own skin! I feel so comfortable in my body when I am exercising and love to spend hours at the gym working out. It is great to realize how strong we are and work up a good sweat. That's very sweet about your kids! :)

I've never really played raquetball. Sounds fun!

I love this thread. I am just now really learning to really love being comfortable in my own skin. I just recently joined a gym with my kids and we play raquetball and lift weights. It is really cool they support me and help me out in keeping track of the weights I lift so I can see the progress. I like being fluffy there is more of me to love

[Soft*Silver]

I use to love playing raquetball! But the action is too fast for me now and I hit with my bad arm, so no can play anymore. Someday!

We just got back from hauling huge boxes of every kind of hanger you can imagine, into the store's storage. And fixtures. So many diff ways to hang clothes! I got a special gold bar and chain so i can hang it off the ceiling high to hang my wedding and evening gowns. Beautiful!

I still have another load to do. The couple I am getting this stuff from were scrabbling so I had to call it a day. If I tried to do a second load I think they would have divorced,lol. Moving things out from one's dream crashing (she had to close down her store) is so stressful. So Monday I go back...

I was dancing with the mannequin's yesterday. Tralalalala....my own music, my own theme song...a cross between Rocky and Bambi's theme songs..lol

[Soft*Silver]

thanks to a wonderful benefactor, I was able to layaway two beautiful showcases for my jewelry. Not only am I selling store bought jewerly, I have local artists who are making/designing special lines for my store that cannot be purchased anywhere but in my store!

Here is what one of them looks like! They light up and lock!

http://i297.photobucket.com/albums/mm216/softness57/422750_3488530380380_1485088108_33041116_150338944 0_n.jpg

[1QuirkyKiwi]

My Doctors Surgery has recently been taken over by a new set of GPs; there's a part of me this is nervous because they see my size and weight and automatically assume I'm unhealthy.

The precious GP at my practice was a locum covering for my old GP who has sold the practice after having a baby. He was insisting my weight was an issue on two grounds;
1. Was my blood work (he reckoned my Cholesterol would be high and my Liver Function Tests would be high also).
2. That I had Arthritis in my Spine.

He sent me for another MRI and I cheekily added to the request form that a copy of the results go to my Consultants.

My MRI test results do not show any signs of Arthritis at all! Both my Consultants showed me the scan of my Spine. What is clearly seen is my complicated form of Spina Bifida Occulta. My joints (including my Pelvis) are clear; meaning no sigh of deterioration leading to Arthritis.

Both of my Consultants have said that my Spine (despite my SB) is very strong and well looked after.

My blood results (except my Hb, RBC and Ferritin levels due to my Alpha-Thalassaemia, which are always in my boots, which are down stairs in the shoe cabinet, lol!) are well within normal and healthy ranges. My Cholesterol is 3.3 and my fasting Glucose Serum is 3.6. The UK range is 2.5 - 7.8.

My hope is that my new GP will see these results and not judge me on my size and weight!

I've always believed that being a BBW doesn't mean that the woman's health is bad. It's not possible to see what's going on inside our bodies, but, being fat is not necessarily a time bomb waiting to go off!

Mis Tia, Good Luck with your new venture! I hope the shop is a great success! :)

[nycfem]

So true! And I am so happy to hear your news. Thanks so much for sharing.

Luckily I don't have medical issues that require frequent trips to the doctor, but for those who do, many doctors take the easy way out of helping us, blaming weight on issues that have nothing to do with the actual issue. I wouldn't say I have a "fat positive" doctor per se, but he also has never used my weight as a reason not to successfully address any problem that I've had over the years. My weight is not brought up unless I bring it up. I'm thankful for that, and it's a big reason why I keep him! What a danger it is for all the people who have to go to doctors and hear the same trite diet advice and fat phobic, ignorant shaming, while treatable problems are left not addressed. It's no wonder fat people sometimes avoid the doctor because of this! Each of us is worth finding the right doctor!


I've always believed that being a BBW doesn't mean that the woman's health is bad. It's not possible to see what's going on inside our bodies, but, being fat is not necessarily a time bomb waiting to go off!

[istolurboxers38]

I have struggled with my weight most of my life. My parents were one that filled my plate and made me finish everything. I am so happy that the kids are participating in my new transformation. I dont want to loose that much or be a stick but become healthier. I have a hard time playing raquetball with my knee it has the arthritis and have to experiemtn with cortozone shots. Has anyone had those? I need to know what to expect. I told the doc I would try it once if it didnt help I wouldnt go back. I am trying to leave my old life and my past and become a new person. Does anyone else have a list of things they want to change?

[Soft*Silver]

when I had no medical coverage after first returning to Ohio, I went to a free clinic. I could barely move, the pain was excruciating. I shuffled. I couldnt sit for any period of time and actually had to lay on floors if i went places, if the time last more than an hour. Life was horrible for me and I was so depressed. I needed medication to ease the back spasms and to get me back on thyroid meds, anti depression meds, etc. medicines that would allow me to live without feeling like a walking tomb of pain.

I had a Dr at this free clinic who would not focus on my symptoms. He focused on my fat. He said he wanted me to lose weight before he would give me meds. I was told to give up all animal products and go on a vegetarian diet. That was all nice but I had no money for food at the time and was getting free food from the churches and veggies was not part of their plan. He scolded me everytime I came in. I wept often. I begged for meds. He gave me synthroid finally and that was it.

When i got into the Bureau of Vocational Rehab, BVR, my case manager took one look at me, picked up the phone and ordered my medicines for me thru that Dr and paid for them. If not for her intervention, he would have punished me forever for being fat. As soon as I had my meds in me and they were working, I started losing weight. I was more active and my metabolism increased. But it wasnt the weight. i had MEDICAL CONDITIONS that caused my pain. My weight didnt cause them!

I look back on those days and wonder how I survived. And its amazing I survived and how far I have come in a few years! Fatopia now! LOL

[nycfem]

Hi, I am a cortisone success story. It was a miracle for me. Years ago I developed a progressively more excruciating pain in my left hip such that I began to use a cane! This went on for a year! Of course, family and "friends" told me I'd better lose weight or expect to live this way forever. I went to my doctor, and he told me I had bursitis in my hip and gave me a single quick shot of cortisone before I could even think twice about it. The pain went away what felt like over night, and it NEVER came back, EVER (Everyone still told me that this was only temporary, that I really needed to "lose the weight" or it would come back. Guess what, it's been almost ten years and not a moment of pain!). It was a reminder to me not to avoid a doctor because everyone around us ascribes our health problems to our weight. And, for those who don't yet have one, finding a doctor who doesn't only see through the "fat is the problem" lens is worth all the frustration so that we can be healthiest as possible at whatever weight we are!

I have a hard time playing raquetball with my knee it has the arthritis and have to experiemtn with cortozone shots. Has anyone had those? I need to know what to expect. I told the doc I would try it once if it didnt help I wouldnt go back.

[istolurboxers38]

Thank you NYC Femme I been a CNA and worked around ppl that have gotten the shots, but they have all had other things wrong with them too. I never knew if it helped or didnt and I know one person it didnt help. I really hope that it helps. My weight goes up and goes down, I think I just have gotten to the point I need to stop fighting it. If I loose it I loose it if not then oh well. It just gets hard sometimes because some people wont stop to see the person on the inside if you dont look a certain way on the outside.

[1QuirkyKiwi]

So true! And I am so happy to hear your news. Thanks so much for sharing.

Luckily I don't have medical issues that require frequent trips to the doctor, but for those who do, many doctors take the easy way out of helping us, blaming weight on issues that have nothing to do with the actual issue. I wouldn't say I have a "fat positive" doctor per se, but he also has never used my weight as a reason not to successfully address any problem that I've had over the years. My weight is not brought up unless I bring it up. I'm thankful for that, and it's a big reason why I keep him! What a danger it is for all the people who have to go to doctors and hear the same trite diet advice and fat phobic, ignorant shaming, while treatable problems are left not addressed. It's no wonder fat people sometimes avoid the doctor because of this! Each of us is worth finding the right doctor!
Thank you!

I’ve had Doctors in the past that have been more accepting of Plus Size patients. There is a trend in the UK in recent years where children and adults of normal weight and above are being targeted as unhealthy with no existing health issues.

A recent trend here is GPs being Fat phobic and using it as a prognosis for a person’s ill health. They have targets to meet on certain health issues; for every target they achieve they receive a large sum of money. Healthcare here has changed for the worst.

Back home, we have a 3 tier health system with those who can’t afford health care being subsidised. Unfortunately, a lot of health care professionals prefer to work overseas. When I decide to return home to live, I will be forced to lose weight, yet, NZ is one of the countries with the highest population of people who are Plus Size. The majority are Polynesian. Somehow, I’m expected to change my DNA and lose weight to live in my home country. It’s ludicrous!

[LaneyDoll]

What is clearly seen is my complicated form of Spina Bifida Occulta.

I have this too!!! Do you find that when your back hurts, it hurts really, really, really bad?

:sparklyheart:

[1QuirkyKiwi]

I have struggled with my weight most of my life. My parents were one that filled my plate and made me finish everything. I am so happy that the kids are participating in my new transformation. I dont want to loose that much or be a stick but become healthier. I have a hard time playing raquetball with my knee it has the arthritis and have to experiemtn with cortozone shots. Has anyone had those? I need to know what to expect. I told the doc I would try it once if it didnt help I wouldnt go back. I am trying to leave my old life and my past and become a new person. Does anyone else have a list of things they want to change?

when I had no medical coverage after first returning to Ohio, I went to a free clinic. I could barely move, the pain was excruciating. I shuffled. I couldnt sit for any period of time and actually had to lay on floors if i went places, if the time last more than an hour. Life was horrible for me and I was so depressed. I needed medication to ease the back spasms and to get me back on thyroid meds, anti depression meds, etc. medicines that would allow me to live without feeling like a walking tomb of pain.

I had a Dr at this free clinic who would not focus on my symptoms. He focused on my fat. He said he wanted me to lose weight before he would give me meds. I was told to give up all animal products and go on a vegetarian diet. That was all nice but I had no money for food at the time and was getting free food from the churches and veggies was not part of their plan. He scolded me everytime I came in. I wept often. I begged for meds. He gave me synthroid finally and that was it.

When i got into the Bureau of Vocational Rehab, BVR, my case manager took one look at me, picked up the phone and ordered my medicines for me thru that Dr and paid for them. If not for her intervention, he would have punished me forever for being fat. As soon as I had my meds in me and they were working, I started losing weight. I was more active and my metabolism increased. But it wasnt the weight. i had MEDICAL CONDITIONS that caused my pain. My weight didnt cause them!

I look back on those days and wonder how I survived. And its amazing I survived and how far I have come in a few years! Fatopia now! LOL

Hi, I am a cortisone success story. It was a miracle for me. Years ago I developed a progressively more excruciating pain in my left hip such that I began to use a cane! This went on for a year! Of course, family and "friends" told me I'd better lose weight or expect to live this way forever. I went to my doctor, and he told me I had bursitis in my hip and gave me a single quick shot of cortisone before I could even think twice about it. The pain went away what felt like over night, and it NEVER came back, EVER (Everyone still told me that this was only temporary, that I really needed to "lose the weight" or it would come back. Guess what, it's been almost ten years and not a moment of pain!). It was a reminder to me not to avoid a doctor because everyone around us ascribes our health problems to our weight. And, for those who don't yet have one, finding a doctor who doesn't only see through the "fat is the problem" lens is worth all the frustration so that we can be healthiest as possible at whatever weight we are!


After my accident last year I was given an Epidural Cortizone Injection. It's not usually done on SB suffers and only has a 50% of success; on my it only worked about 30%, lasting for a few days. I suffered the worst headache I've ever had for nearly a week afterwards. I'm not sure if it was an allergic reaction to the steroid used or from the actual Epidural itself (a common side affect). Either way, I'm in no hurry to have any more in the future, although I've been refered for pain management.

Both my Consultants admitted that my size prevented my from being permenantly paralysed or worse!

[1QuirkyKiwi]

I have this too!!! Do you find that when your back hurts, it hurts really, really, really bad?

:sparklyheart:

When my back is in spasm the pain is unbearable! Then I need crutches to walk and I'm a hooligan on them! LOL! I have constant pain which is managable a lot of the time. I have a tethered Spinal Cord which caiuses further issues.

I'm fortunate that I have a strong back and I do a lot of Yoga to help with pain management. When I was a competitive swimmer in my teens, I would get severe cramp in my back and legs. I took up Iyengar Yoga which helped to relax my muscles.

May I ask; have you had any treatments for your SBO?

[LaneyDoll]

When my back is in spasm the pain is unbearable! Then I need crutches to walk and I'm a hooligan on them! LOL! I have constant pain which is managable a lot of the time. I have a tethered Spinal Cord which caiuses further issues.

I'm fortunate that I have a strong back and I do a lot of Yoga to help with pain management. When I was a competitive swimmer in my teens, I would get severe cramp in my back and legs. I took up Iyengar Yoga which helped to relax my muscles.

May I ask; have you had any treatments for your SBO?


No, I have not. I am in between primary care MDs at the moment and really am so stretched for time that I keep putting it off.

Typical for me ;)

:sparklyheart:

[Soft*Silver]

so my landlord STILL has not done the carpets but he has made me a key finally. Progress! LOL.

I got to spend an entire day with horses yesterday. if you know me, you know how much I love horses and need them in my life. Well, today I cant walk. I cant sit up. I am in so much pain but its glorious pain! People who knew me before my surgery all squealed over the weight I had lost.But then they all said, "gee, we thought you would get skinny"

seriously? Another round of "your surgery was a failure. Doesnt matter that I can breath and my stumach isnt coming out of my mouth anymore...geee...

so tomorrow I go into my store ("my store" omg..it sounds so good!) and start to put together my office. Photos, files, decor, etc. I need to make it my special place.

Maybe i am emotional...but honestly I just wanted to cry when i typed "my store"...

I am so glad I have this place to come to and talk about it too. It means so much to me that there is a group of people who understand and can relate to why this is so important to me

[Toughy]

Thank you!

<snip>

A recent trend here is GPs being Fat phobic and using it as a prognosis for a person’s ill health. They have targets to meet on certain health issues; for every target they achieve they receive a large sum of money. Healthcare here has changed for the worst.

Back home, we have a 3 tier health system with those who can’t afford health care being subsidised.

<snip>



What you are saying about how GPs are paid is not really true. Here is a link that explains how docs in the UK are being paid under the new contract.

http://www.bma.org.uk/press_centre/pressgps.jsp#.T2jtiBHy_Qg

How general practice is funded

Almost all funding in the current contract is practice-based. This means that payments are made to the practice and not to individual GPs. Expenses - for example, rent, utility bills and staff wages - are taken out of this funding pot and the amount remaining, after the cost of providing clinical services has been taken out, makes up the pay available to the GP partners.

The funding formula is extremely complex and funding is distributed to practices according to the weighted needs of their population - for example a practice with a large elderly population, and therefore a greater workload, will get more funding than a practice with a relatively young, healthy population.

GP practices receive their funding through several major streams, though the main ones are the Global Sum, the Quality and Outcomes Framework (QOF), and Enhanced Services:

Here is an abstract from Health Affairs (www.healthaffairs.org)

Quality Incentives: The Case Of U.K. General Practitioners
Peter C. Smith and Nick York

Abstract

The United Kingdom is implementing major changes to the national contract for general practitioners (GPs). A central plank of the new arrangements is an ambitious scheme to reward high-quality care. Each general practice will be scored on 146 performance indicators according to the measured quality of care it delivers, and its accumulated score will determine the magnitude of the quality payment it receives. About 18 percent of practice earnings will be at risk. This paper describes the incentive scheme, discusses its potential benefits and risks, and draws out the implications for evaluation.

One of the things that has happened under this new contract is the significantly increased number of folks being diagnosed with diabetes. It has been written up in several medical journals.




It is my understanding that New Zealand has a two-tiered payment system, although I have not done recent research on their system. (I lived in NZ in early 2000 and received health care there...)



There are plenty of inaccuracies about how nationalized health care works in other countries being said in the US. I just hate seeing more put out there.

[1QuirkyKiwi]

What you are saying about how GPs are paid is not really true. Here is a link that explains how docs in the UK are being paid under the new contract.

http://www.bma.org.uk/press_centre/pressgps.jsp#.T2jtiBHy_Qg

How general practice is funded

Almost all funding in the current contract is practice-based. This means that payments are made to the practice and not to individual GPs. Expenses - for example, rent, utility bills and staff wages - are taken out of this funding pot and the amount remaining, after the cost of providing clinical services has been taken out, makes up the pay available to the GP partners.

The funding formula is extremely complex and funding is distributed to practices according to the weighted needs of their population - for example a practice with a large elderly population, and therefore a greater workload, will get more funding than a practice with a relatively young, healthy population.

GP practices receive their funding through several major streams, though the main ones are the Global Sum, the Quality and Outcomes Framework (QOF), and Enhanced Services:

Here is an abstract from Health Affairs (www.healthaffairs.org)

Quality Incentives: The Case Of U.K. General Practitioners
Peter C. Smith and Nick York

Abstract

The United Kingdom is implementing major changes to the national contract for general practitioners (GPs). A central plank of the new arrangements is an ambitious scheme to reward high-quality care. Each general practice will be scored on 146 performance indicators according to the measured quality of care it delivers, and its accumulated score will determine the magnitude of the quality payment it receives. About 18 percent of practice earnings will be at risk. This paper describes the incentive scheme, discusses its potential benefits and risks, and draws out the implications for evaluation.

One of the things that has happened under this new contract is the significantly increased number of folks being diagnosed with diabetes. It has been written up in several medical journals.




It is my understanding that New Zealand has a two-tiered payment system, although I have not done recent research on their system. (I lived in NZ in early 2000 and received health care there...)



There are plenty of inaccuracies about how nationalized health care works in other countries being said in the US. I just hate seeing more put out there.

My cousin works for the same NHS I’m talking about and has done for many years. He has known of the financial incentives being paid to GPs. Several Locum Doctors have been prosecuted in recent years for misusing funds.

In NZ Primary Care (GPs) and medications on the list of the New Zealand government agency require co-payments, but are subsidised, especially for patients with community health services cards or high user health cards; low income families and the disabled. Surgeries and other medical treatments are paid for by health insurance schemes for members privately. Those that can be for treatment, do.

[Toughy]

Me in this color

My cousin works for the same NHS I’m talking about and has done for many years. He has known of the financial incentives being paid to GPs. Several Locum Doctors have been prosecuted in recent years for misusing funds.

This statement is different from your original statement. Fraud exists in every health care system and is a very small percentage of the cost of health care. There are fraud task forces in the UK that address that issue. It's not some huge percentage of GPs that commit fraud. It's more like several as you said. If I remember correctly, in the entire US, the large overwhelmingly majority of fraud is committed by less than 100 clinicians.

In NZ Primary Care (GPs) and medications on the list of the New Zealand government agency require co-payments, but are subsidised, especially for patients with community health services cards or high user health cards; low income families and the disabled. Surgeries and other medical treatments are paid for by health insurance schemes for members privately. Those that can be for treatment, do.

My picky point was you said a 3 tiered system. My understanding (and what you describe) is a two-tiered system. What you describe is pretty much the same as it was when I lived there. I had co-pays for both primary care and prescriptions and all I payed was the co-pay. I thought overall I received great care in NZ.



As I said I hate inaccuracies. Anyway....back to the fat positive talk

[1QuirkyKiwi]

Me in this color




As I said I hate inaccuracies. Anyway....back to the fat positive talk


No disrespect intended in this discussion; having been raised in NZ and living in the UK for the past 5 years my statements are not inaccurate. They are based on my own knowledge and experience as well of that of my cousin, as I mentioned before.

He has asked several of the Doctors he works with, how the system ‘really works’ and not what is detailed on the internet.

[Toughy]

No disrespect intended in this discussion; having been raised in NZ and living in the UK for the past 5 years my statements are not inaccurate. They are based on my own knowledge and experience as well of that of my cousin, as I mentioned before.

He has asked several of the Doctors he works with, how the system ‘really works’ and not what is detailed on the internet.




I do believe the British Medical Association.....they negotiated the contract with the government on behalf of doctors..........is a highly reputable organization. What they say is factual.

Health Affairs is the leading journal of health policy thought and research. The peer-reviewed journal was founded in 1981 under the aegis of Project HOPE, a nonprofit international health education organization. Health Affairs explores health policy issues of current concern in both domestic (US) and international spheres.

Neither of my references are from just any place on the net. Both are highly respected and are factual. Your opinion is not fact.....no disrespect intended.

[1QuirkyKiwi]

I do believe the British Medical Association.....they negotiated the contract with the government on behalf of doctors..........is a highly reputable organization. What they say is factual.

Health Affairs is the leading journal of health policy thought and research. The peer-reviewed journal was founded in 1981 under the aegis of Project HOPE, a nonprofit international health education organization. Health Affairs explores health policy issues of current concern in both domestic (US) and international spheres.

Neither of my references are from just any place on the net. Both are highly respected and are factual. Your opinion is not fact.....no disrespect intended.

On this matter, it’s best if we just agree to disagree! …And as you say; back to the fat positive talk.

[ButchEire]

I have to speak to this, as a person with their name on several published research studies. Kiwi is correct, or rather her cousin is. The system at large, in the United States and from what she said, in the UK and NZ IS driven by funding, not finding. Statistics can be contorted and distorted to fit any argument and unfortunately, that is typically the case.


No disrespect intended in this discussion; having been raised in NZ and living in the UK for the past 5 years my statements are not inaccurate. They are based on my own knowledge and experience as well of that of my cousin, as I mentioned before.

He has asked several of the Doctors he works with, how the system ‘really works’ and not what is detailed on the internet.




I do believe the British Medical Association.....they negotiated the contract with the government on behalf of doctors..........is a highly reputable organization. What they say is factual.

Health Affairs is the leading journal of health policy thought and research. The peer-reviewed journal was founded in 1981 under the aegis of Project HOPE, a nonprofit international health education organization. Health Affairs explores health policy issues of current concern in both domestic (US) and international spheres.

Neither of my references are from just any place on the net. Both are highly respected and are factual. Your opinion is not fact.....no disrespect intended.

[Toughy]

Big whoopeee you are an author on published papers.............so am I.

This is NOT fat positive based and let's not derail this thread anymore.

[ButchEire]

I was simply responding to what you wrote. Yes, author of books, several thousand articles, published studies and a practicing psychotherapist. As a published researcher, you should also recognize just how contorted and manipulated the medical system is.
I'm done here, didn't need to derail, but I also don't like the idealism placed on any medical association.

Big whoopeee you are an author on published papers.............so am I.

This is NOT fat positive based and let's not derail this thread anymore.

[Gemme]

:blink:

So, how 'bout them Longhorns?

:blink:

[1QuirkyKiwi]

:blink:

So, how 'bout them Longhorns?

:blink:

It reeeeaaally depends on the style of 'em! The Shorthorns are easier to fit into tight spaces, :| but.....the Longhorns offer more in the way of durability... :D

...That is, unless you're talking about the Texas Longhorns; if so, what 'bout 'em? What assests do they have? ;) LOL!

[Toughy]

since I am puter ignorant and can't do it in this post...........

I uploaded a picture of a herd of longhorns on a friend of mines ranch outside Midland TX.

go to my gallery

[1QuirkyKiwi]

This afternoon at the Disabled Arts Studio, a new comer gave me a big hug as she was leaving. She told me she likes me because I’m soft, cuddly, laugh a lot and have a proper body. I had to fight back the tears…

*Hankie please...

[Licious]

I am not around any fat positive people that I know of per se, but I would say that now new roomies I have are not fat prejudiced. So this is a good start. I feel accepted, not judged on a daily basis. I am still working on feeling sexy at this weight, and liking how my body looks. Thank you all for the help, I really appreciate it.

[1QuirkyKiwi]

I am not around any fat positive people that I know of per se, but I would say that now new roomies I have are not fat prejudiced. So this is a good start. I feel accepted, not judged on a daily basis. I am still working on feeling sexy at this weight, and liking how my body looks. Thank you all for the help, I really appreciate it.



You’re welcome! :) It makes a big difference (no pun intended, lol!) when we BBWs are accepted for who we are and not how others believe we should be, and we have the support of other BBWs.

It’s very positive that you are gently working on feeling sexy and liking how your body looks as a BBW is a very sensuous and seductive feeling from within. This radiates outwards and people will see you as a ray of sunshine!

I hope we see more of you in this thread. :)

[Soft*Silver]

oh gracious! I love this phrase! Imma gonna use it!


This afternoon at the Disabled Arts Studio, a new comer gave me a big hug as she was leaving. She told me she likes me because I’m soft, cuddly, laugh a lot and have a proper body. I had to fight back the tears…

*Hankie please...

[Soft*Silver]

I have not been around because My chrissy has hit his head and given himself a concussion. He is deathly afraid of hospitals and combined with his symptoms of personality change and confusion, I have been beside myself. No work was done on the store except for some forms I created while in the house watching and observing him so he didnt die on me.

[Leigh]

Hi everyone, just wanted to come in and say hi :)

[1QuirkyKiwi]

oh gracious! I love this phrase! Imma gonna use it!

It's great, isn't it? That phrase has been whirling around my head ever since the young Lady said it to me, lol!

[Soft*Silver]

ok today was a better day. Chrissy is himself again and I can relax. He wont go to a Dr damn him! He was traumatized as a youth by some Drs so he has cause for his anxiety but still....

my landlord broke the toilet in the store. (rolls eyes and laughs) of course he did! Little things that are driving me crazy!

I set up a 2 week time period to accept consignments. I had one women contact me, who is obviously very poor, and she told me how awful it was for someone her size to try to find clothes cheap in thrift stores. She is excited about my Helping Bin, where I am going to put harder worn clothes in there, for 25 cents to a $1, proceeds going to 4 different charities I will support locally. Its all she can afford she says to me.

I tell her, honey, introduce yourself when you come in, cuz I have some 50% off coupons for my store, that I will let YOU use on the Helping Bin clothes.

She squealed, she was so excited!

This store is going to be so good for my heart....

[SugarFemme]

I LOVE this quote...but change "flaw" to something more positive.





http://sphotos.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ash4/s320x320/419710_293060997427716_224723384261478_723786_6393 88991_n.jpg

[cara]

Oooh! I musta missed this forum earlier. So glad I found it! :D

This fat chick today decided to get serious about checking something off her bucket list...eventually. I signed up for a 10K walk/run this summer! I will likely be walking it, but it's the first step towards participating in a triathalon *and* the STP bike series (It's a 200-mile bike ride between Seattle and Portland).

Am I crazy? Perhaps. But I'm sooo excited! :) :) :)

:stillheart:

[Soft*Silver]

I dropped by that gal's (the one I posted about just recently) home today and surprised her with an Easter outfit for free, out of my store. She cried and laughed and giggled as she tried it on....it looked so good on her, but her smile from ear to ear was the best thing on her...

[Soft*Silver]

I finally got it! He steamed my rugs and is putting in a whole new toilet and has moved most of his stuff out of there...thank heavens! LOL. Now I need to focus on moving in and this sign!

So the measurements are 90" long and 50" high for where this sign goes. Do not try to match colors. Do as you will for whatever you sign up for. I know Claybaby wants to do the letter BEAU. So the rest are up for grabs. Who else would like to do this? I will be posting this in the Scrapbook and crafting thread and would like to organize it there if thats ok with everyone. So please join me there if you would like to do this project for the ladies of my store!

http://i5.photobucket.com/albums/y196/njneere/Greetings/beautiful-you.jpg

[Bad_boi]

Big girls make me happy. That is all.

[1QuirkyKiwi]

Big girls make me happy. That is all.

Welcome to the Lounge! Will you be joining us more often?

[1QuirkyKiwi]

I am one very Happy’n’Fat Kiwi! LOL!

I met one of my new GPs today; she seems very nice and very thorough. She’s a former Neurology Consultant and wanted to see me for a routine check-up and examination as she’s new…

She’s over ridden my Spinal Orthopaedic Consultant’s decision to send me to a Neurologist he recommended that I be referred to for my other back issues. She feels, in her medical opinion, that I’d be better suited with another Neurologist who specialises in SB and other inherited Spinal problems and who also deal with other issues of the Spine in people with SB, etc.

She wasn’t bothered about my weight and knew it isn’t a problem for me and my Blood Pressure is normal. So, with this and my annual blood test results being excellent, I’m Fat and Healthy! LOL! :cheesy:

[Bad_boi]

Welcome to the Lounge! Will you be joining us more often?

It is always possible.

[1QuirkyKiwi]

I came across this article on one of the UK’s online newspapers and had to share it after reading it…

The article starts with the headline; 'I love the word FAT': The larger-than-life fashion bloggers, celebrating plus-size style in a big way.”

The article also has links to a handful of Fat Positive Blogs…

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-2124172/I-love-word-FAT-The-larger-life-fashion-bloggers-celebrating-plus-size-style-big-way.html

[nycfem]

Check out this funky plus size website for puffy grrls:

http://www.dominodollhouse.com/index.php

[nycfem]

Special thanks to LeftWriteFemme for posting this on my wall :)

http://26.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lyu47aYCEG1qj6wguo1_500.jpg

[1QuirkyKiwi]

My recent trip away over Easter with just me and my Backpack brought back memories of when I did a lot of Backpacking in my early 20s for work and pleasure. My fondest memories are of my time in Indonesia, Backpacking with a belly! LOL!

I am fat! I have belly that wobbles when I walk and a bum that echoes my movements. Don’t get me wrong, this is not some life-altering confession a la alcoholics anonymous: Rather, it’s an easy way for you to picture me, climbing up a rope, bum over end into the back of a rocking Indonesian fishing boat, desperately trying not to bounce into the propeller and retain,….. well, at least a crumb of dignity. I have a plus-size body….. Backpacking is always adventurous but it takes on many new twists when a plus-size body, SBO and crutches meets rickety transport, bamboo bridges, and tiny locals who find all westernised people… let alone those with wobbly bellies….. startling!

Let’s take the tiny upright women of central Lombok who are less than half my size. Whether in the multi-coloured chaos of the local markets, the golden rice fields, or the white washed lanes of small villages, my appearance invariably produces animated discussions in Sasak and wild gestures toward me. The boldest of the group comes up to me and slaps my thick arm, uttering more exclamations. Gestures of eating, offers of rice follow.... One old woman pats her hips, expands them large with her hands and then follows her breasts, producing proportions that would make Dolly Parton proud! LOL! The message is always the same; a good breeder. The scene is replayed throughout the islands Polynesia, the Caribbean and southern Europe…

Size is frankly acknowledged and appreciated….. a refreshing change from the weight police. When I learned how to thresh rice, the women circled my waist with their hands and said, “Stay! You are a good worker!” “ But I would eat too much rice, and then there would be more work.” I replied. “Ah yes!” The women nod sagely, ever the wise housekeepers. The Indonesians always appreciated my pride when I come back from a day clambering around the fields with and without my crutches, knowing that I did the best work I could.

They can imagine how hard it is at my size to avoid falling, breaking a delicate bamboo bridge or slipping down a muddy slope. The only murmur of discontent . . . and more often riotous laughter . . . was on local transport, where a combination of my size and innate clumsiness could have proved disastrous. I took up three seats, and with my legs up to my chin, a huge backpack, crutches and my late beloved cat, it took a while to untangle me! LOL! My most fervent wish when squashing past startled locals in their tiny minivans, aiming for an unlikely looking space at the back, is: “Please don’t let me get stuck!” LOL!

[Soft*Silver]

I am battling a slow case worker at BVR who is holding up the progress of my store so much that I have had to report him to his supervisor twice now this past month. The third time happened yesterday. He dared send me an email saying he needed my address, which has not changed in the 3 years I have been working with them. He has not sent me the items I need, nor issued the monies I need, nor approved the purchases I need! I am beginning to panic!

However, the supervisor and I talked yesterday and she assured me she can still get these things to me in time and will be addressing his insufficient work with me, today. I await a phone call.

he has literally put me two weeks behind. I tried to be hopeful about it, but I cant even take consignments without the items he is holding up!

But, the store will open..its just a matter of when. And two weeks off isnt bad. I need to breathe....just breathe...lol

[aishah]

I am battling a slow case worker at BVR who is holding up the progress of my store so much that I have had to report him to his supervisor twice now this past month. The third time happened yesterday. He dared send me an email saying he needed my address, which has not changed in the 3 years I have been working with them. He has not sent me the items I need, nor issued the monies I need, nor approved the purchases I need! I am beginning to panic!

However, the supervisor and I talked yesterday and she assured me she can still get these things to me in time and will be addressing his insufficient work with me, today. I await a phone call.

he has literally put me two weeks behind. I tried to be hopeful about it, but I cant even take consignments without the items he is holding up!

But, the store will open..its just a matter of when. And two weeks off isnt bad. I need to breathe....just breathe...lol

you can do it, miss tia! you are awesome :)

[nycfem]

I love hearing about your adventures! I have not travelled much in my life and am so intrigued by any culture that values a fat woman. I wonder where in the world would be the best place to visit in terms of a full-figured woman not being automatically judged as being unhealthy and unattractive. Conversely, I wonder what the worst places are. Any thoughts?

My recent trip away over Easter with just me and my Backpack brought back memories of when I did a lot of Backpacking in my early 20s for work and pleasure. My fondest memories are of my time in Indonesia, Backpacking with a belly! LOL!

I am fat! I have belly that wobbles when I walk and a bum that echoes my movements. Don’t get me wrong, this is not some life-altering confession a la alcoholics anonymous: Rather, it’s an easy way for you to picture me, climbing up a rope, bum over end into the back of a rocking Indonesian fishing boat, desperately trying not to bounce into the propeller and retain,….. well, at least a crumb of dignity. I have a plus-size body….. Backpacking is always adventurous but it takes on many new twists when a plus-size body, SBO and crutches meets rickety transport, bamboo bridges, and tiny locals who find all westernised people… let alone those with wobbly bellies….. startling!

Let’s take the tiny upright women of central Lombok who are less than half my size. Whether in the multi-coloured chaos of the local markets, the golden rice fields, or the white washed lanes of small villages, my appearance invariably produces animated discussions in Sasak and wild gestures toward me. The boldest of the group comes up to me and slaps my thick arm, uttering more exclamations. Gestures of eating, offers of rice follow.... One old woman pats her hips, expands them large with her hands and then follows her breasts, producing proportions that would make Dolly Parton proud! LOL! The message is always the same; a good breeder. The scene is replayed throughout the islands Polynesia, the Caribbean and southern Europe…

Size is frankly acknowledged and appreciated….. a refreshing change from the weight police. When I learned how to thresh rice, the women circled my waist with their hands and said, “Stay! You are a good worker!” “ But I would eat too much rice, and then there would be more work.” I replied. “Ah yes!” The women nod sagely, ever the wise housekeepers. The Indonesians always appreciated my pride when I come back from a day clambering around the fields with and without my crutches, knowing that I did the best work I could.

They can imagine how hard it is at my size to avoid falling, breaking a delicate bamboo bridge or slipping down a muddy slope. The only murmur of discontent . . . and more often riotous laughter . . . was on local transport, where a combination of my size and innate clumsiness could have proved disastrous. I took up three seats, and with my legs up to my chin, a huge backpack, crutches and my late beloved cat, it took a while to untangle me! LOL! My most fervent wish when squashing past startled locals in their tiny minivans, aiming for an unlikely looking space at the back, is: “Please don’t let me get stuck!” LOL!

[1QuirkyKiwi]

I love hearing about your adventures! I have not travelled much in my life and am so intrigued by any culture that values a fat woman. I wonder where in the world would be the best place to visit in terms of a full-figured woman not being automatically judged as being unhealthy and unattractive. Conversely, I wonder what the worst places are. Any thoughts?

Thank you! I’ve noticed a huge change in the past 20 years to the attitudes of fat women in various cultures. If you’d asked me these questions 10 years ago, I would have said unreservedly Polynesia, Africa and Indonesia as the best fat friendly places to travel. Sadly, these cultures are now succumbing to the ‘fat is bad and unhealthy’ mentality. There are still people within these cultures who enjoy and accept us fat ladies, but, it’s being pushed behind doors.

Italy enjoys the womanly figure and is accepting; at least they are where my Nonna is from on the Tuscan/Ligurian border. In Norway, I’ve experienced fat positivity, but, not so much in Sweden…

Russia was my biggest shock! I was treated as though I was a Goddess and worth my weight in gold! (That’s a lot of gold, there! LOL!).

Africa was a dream come true! There, a woman’s belly, bum and thighs are deemed the most seductive and attractive….. The bigger the better! A woman can have enormous breasts, yet, they will not be gawked at in the same way. My thighs and belly were often the source of much admiration…

The truth is, I’ve experienced a fair mix of positive and negative acceptance around the world. What has made the difference is how I’ve handled it and handled myself in response to the negativity and myself as a Fat woman with pride and confidence (without being arrogant).

For me, the worst place is here in the UK. I’ve been met with some of the most hurtful and insulting comments and gestures from just walking down the road, minding my own business.

[nycfem]

I'm on break from work this week (I work at a school) so I'm rereading this thread and jumping back where I've had a thought but felt like I didn't have time to post :)

istolurboxers38 posted (snip):

I have a hard time playing raquetball with my knee it has the arthritis

This made me think about exercise for larger people in general and what works / doesn't work. I love to exercise and by experimentation and research over the years have found ways to minimize the chances of injury as a fat girl.

Here are my thoughts on exercise for bigger women, not as a professional, but as a fat woman who loves to get physical in a big way!

1) Swimming is great when available. Exacerbation of knee issues (e.g. arthritis) can be minimized by doing the front stroke and the back stroke and avoiding the breast stroke. I've been told and found that kicking in water doesn't tend to cause problems while doing strokes in which the leg is pushing at an angle (e.g. breast stroke) does. I like to swim laps and then stretch in the pool. For instance, for the past week I've been having lower back pain due to having lifted too much weight and pulled something (a rarity for me but oh so annoying when it happens) at the gym. So yesterday I did laps for half an hour and spent another half hour just stretching in the water. A plus for big swimmers is that we don't get cold as easy. I see smaller people shivering but I've got that extra layer of fat that keeps the water comfortable. I have read about fat, long distance cold, open water swimmers who say the same thing. And, of course, we are more buoyant. :) I have had times in my life where I would regularly swim a mile or two a day in one to two hours. So much for all fat people being sedentary and incapable of serious, regular exercise. Yes, people can be fit and fat :)

2) I love to use a stationary bike. I find it helps to choose a medium level (not too high and not too low- as either extreme, I find, negatively impacts the knees). When we are on a bike, we are not bearing down on our full weight, so aside from swimming, I find it to be the best exercise for larger women in terms of not being injured. We have natural butt padding which helps me go longer distance. I can bike hard (where I'm sweating and breathing hard) for up to three hours (Usually I do one hour.). I also lift weights or do arm exercises sometimes while I bike which gets the heart rate higher.

3) Regular walking (ideally not on a treadmill) is relatively low injury. Jogging and running, on the other hand, put a lot of weight on the knees for larger women, and I find it riskier and don't do it.

4) I stretch and do floor exercises for a minimum of 30 minutes every time I go to the gym. Stretching after long work-outs feels fantastic and, again, minimizes injury for me.

Anyone else have thoughts on exercise? I also like the kind of exercise that 1QuirkyKiwi described: getting physical in the context of an adventure. While off this week from work, for three days in a row I went hiking / rock climbing / walking at the New York Botanical Garden in the Bronx, going off the designated paths at times (I'm incorrigible.). It was so much fun to be negotiating the forest and sliding down rocks. Extra padding can be a real plus :)

[aishah]

i've found that in light of my disabilities and being fat, i have a hard time with stuff like hiking and rock climbing. i do like walking (as long as it's mostly flat i can walk for a long time with my cane). swimming is awesome...sadly, i don't have a complex swimming pool anymore. i might see about going to the community pool this summer. it's a bit expensive though. i also liked biking when i was going to the gym...it's nice because you can kind of do something else (like read) while you're doing it. i like yoga but have had a hard time getting into doing it regularly.

i love dancing and hula hooping. sometimes they are painful if i'm not moving around a lot (if i'm just staying in one place) but for the most part they are one of the least painful, most low impact exercises i know. and they're really fun and burn a lot of calories (~600 an hour for hooping). :) so that's most of what i do nowadays.

[nycfem]

This is so interesting! You've stayed in such a variety of different places and cultures. What part of Africa is most fat accepting, do you think? My brother's husband is from South Africa, and I've never been there.

That sucks about how hard it is in the UK. And yet, I admire the self-confidence you clearly possess and unwillingness to accept the fat-shaming and negative stereotypes. How did you manage not to drink the Koolaide?

Thank you! I’ve noticed a huge change in the past 20 years to the attitudes of fat women in various cultures. If you’d asked me these questions 10 years ago, I would have said unreservedly Polynesia, Africa and Indonesia as the best fat friendly places to travel. Sadly, these cultures are now succumbing to the ‘fat is bad and unhealthy’ mentality. There are still people within these cultures who enjoy and accept us fat ladies, but, it’s being pushed behind doors.

Italy enjoys the womanly figure and is accepting; at least they are where my Nonna is from on the Tuscan/Ligurian border. In Norway, I’ve experienced fat positivity, but, not so much in Sweden…

Russia was my biggest shock! I was treated as though I was a Goddess and worth my weight in gold! (That’s a lot of gold, there! LOL!).

Africa was a dream come true! There, a woman’s belly, bum and thighs are deemed the most seductive and attractive….. The bigger the better! A woman can have enormous breasts, yet, they will not be gawked at in the same way. My thighs and belly were often the source of much admiration…

The truth is, I’ve experienced a fair mix of positive and negative acceptance around the world. What has made the difference is how I’ve handled it and handled myself in response to the negativity and myself as a Fat woman with pride and confidence (without being arrogant).

For me, the worst place is here in the UK. I’ve been met with some of the most hurtful and insulting comments and gestures from just walking down the road, minding my own business.

[1QuirkyKiwi]

I'm on break from work this week (I work at a school) so I'm rereading this thread and jumping back where I've had a thought but felt like I didn't have time to post :)

istolurboxers38 posted (snip):



This made me think about exercise for larger people in general and what works / doesn't work. I love to exercise and by experimentation and research over the years have found ways to minimize the chances of injury as a fat girl.

Here are my thoughts on exercise for bigger women, not as a professional, but as a fat woman who loves to get physical in a big way!

1) Swimming is great when available. Exacerbation of knee issues (e.g. arthritis) can be minimized by doing the front stroke and the back stroke and avoiding the breast stroke. I've been told and found that kicking in water doesn't tend to cause problems while doing strokes in which the leg is pushing at an angle (e.g. breast stroke) does. I like to swim laps and then stretch in the pool. For instance, for the past week I've been having lower back pain due to having lifted too much weight and pulled something (a rarity for me but oh so annoying when it happens) at the gym. So yesterday I did laps for half an hour and spent another half hour just stretching in the water. A plus for big swimmers is that we don't get cold as easy. I see smaller people shivering but I've got that extra layer of fat that keeps the water comfortable. I have read about fat, long distance cold, open water swimmers who say the same thing. And, of course, we are more buoyant. :) I have had times in my life where I would regularly swim a mile or two a day in one to two hours. So much for all fat people being sedentary and incapable of serious, regular exercise. Yes, people can be fit and fat :)

2) I love to use a stationary bike. I find it helps to choose a medium level (not too high and not too low- as either extreme, I find, negatively impacts the knees). When we are on a bike, we are not bearing down on our full weight, so aside from swimming, I find it to be the best exercise for larger women in terms of not being injured. We have natural butt padding which helps me go longer distance. I can bike hard (where I'm sweating and breathing hard) for up to three hours (Usually I do one hour.). I also lift weights or do arm exercises sometimes while I bike which gets the heart rate higher.

3) Regular walking (ideally not on a treadmill) is relatively low injury. Jogging and running, on the other hand, put a lot of weight on the knees for larger women, and I find it riskier and don't do it.

4) I stretch and do floor exercises for a minimum of 30 minutes every time I go to the gym. Stretching after long work-outs feels fantastic and, again, minimizes injury for me.

Anyone else have thoughts on exercise? I also like the kind of exercise that 1QuirkyKiwi described: getting physical in the context of an adventure. While off this week from work, for three days in a row I went hiking / rock climbing / walking at the New York Botanical Garden in the Bronx, going off the designated paths at times (I'm incorrigible.). It was so much fun to be negotiating the forest and sliding down rocks. Extra padding can be a real plus :)

The exercises you describe NYCFEMBBW are excellent, as is Iyengar Yoga (which uses props like blankets and chairs for support in postures. There is a book by Judith Lasater called: Relax and Renew. The Art of gentle Yoga which is excellent. She trained in Iyengar Yoga in Pune, India under BKS Iyengar. She’s also a Physiotherapist). I’m looking to do my training as an instructor in this style…

Tai Chi is also excellent and yep! Enjoying adventures where you’re off the beaten path is so much fun and you feel so energised and great on the inside.

Stairs! Now they are good for gentle exercise….. walking up and down them half a dozen times gets the heart pumping nicely and the lungs working.

Dancing, even if it’s just around the living room to your favourite music, it’s all good!

I've still got thighs the size of mature Oak tree trunks, albeit, toned ones! LOL!

[1QuirkyKiwi]

This is so interesting! You've stayed in such a variety of different places and cultures. What part of Africa is most fat accepting, do you think? My brother's husband is from South Africa, and I've never been there.

That sucks about how hard it is in the UK. And yet, I admire the self-confidence you clearly possess and unwillingness to accept the fat-shaming and negative stereotypes. How did you manage not to drink the Koolaide?

Kenya (one of my favourite places) and Botswana are fat accepting and encourage their women to be fat…

One of my best friends is South African from Durban; when I went there with her on holiday, I was met with some negativity, but, not a lot.

Crikey! Umm… I know my self confidence and comfort about my body comes from fat positive role models from my Maori and Italian Grandmothers and other fat women within my family. My Maori Grandmother was 5’ 10, weighed 35 stone and was very active and healthy until the day she died. My Italian Grandmother was 5’ 6, weighed about 25 stone and was equally fit and healthy, again until she died. I’m 5’7 and weigh a pleasant amount, yet, I’ve always been active.

My role models refused to be stereotyped by western standards of what a fat person is seen as in their perspectives.

My body is my temple; it may not be the ‘ideal’ of what many may feel is attractive, yet, it’s still mine. It’s taken me on adventures I never dreamed of having. It’s helped keep me fed and with a roof over my head when I worked as an Artist’s model at the GSA in Glasgow. It carried my daughter, nourishing her and keeping her safe.

What has been said to me so often and by Butch’s who usually prefer slender Femmes is; my acceptance of and my comfort with my body and my willingness to enjoy life, despite my size, and not make apologies or excuses for being my size. When people ask why I’m fat, I tell them the truth and that I can’t help my genetics, yet, I can try to keep healthy.

Also, I have a few retorts to fire back should the need arise, lol! :angel:

[1QuirkyKiwi]

My brain misplaced this thought... there is (or was. I don't know is it's still the case) a plus size model called Megan Garcia who taught Hatha style Yoga in NYC. She explained how to adapt the Asanas to suit a fat woman's body type and used props as well.

She had a book published called; Mega Yoga.

[1QuirkyKiwi]

I’m sitting here eating a stuffed Avocado and letting my mind musings take a stroll (this can often lead to weird and interesting thoughts and can get me into trouble! LOL!), when I remembered two previous GPs saying that my body shape is that of an Avocado Pear! … It’s between an Apple and a Pear shape. I also remember the huge smile that gave me.

Neither Doctor knew each other, as they were in different countries and when I asked the woman GP who said it, she said that a small percentage of women fall into this category.

If I may ask; are there any other Avocado Pear shapes here?

Are you Pear or Apple shaped?

[aishah]

i'm more hourglass shaped...i'm top and bottom heavy. i carry some weight in my waist but not nearly as much as the rest of me. i love the idea of being avocado shaped! hehe :)

[1QuirkyKiwi]

i'm more hourglass shaped...i'm top and bottom heavy. i carry some weight in my waist but not nearly as much as the rest of me. i love the idea of being avocado shaped! hehe :)

My arms are thick, but, not fat. I have ample breasts, a waist that is shaped like an hour glass, a round belly and very wide hips with large round thighs.

Thank you for sharing. :)

[clay]

just stopping by...to admire all the beautiful ladies in here....you are all truly gorgeous...thru and thru..I heart each one of you!!! :rrose:

[Chancie]

I won an award and

I almost didn't have my picture taken for the press release because

I was afraid of looking fat in the picture.

I do not know how to convey how stressed I was.

I did end up posing in front of a whiteboard full of algebra.

[Ginger]

Hi, I am a cortisone success story. It was a miracle for me. Years ago I developed a progressively more excruciating pain in my left hip such that I began to use a cane! This went on for a year! Of course, family and "friends" told me I'd better lose weight or expect to live this way forever. I went to my doctor, and he told me I had bursitis in my hip and gave me a single quick shot of cortisone before I could even think twice about it. The pain went away what felt like over night, and it NEVER came back, EVER (Everyone still told me that this was only temporary, that I really needed to "lose the weight" or it would come back. Guess what, it's been almost ten years and not a moment of pain!). It was a reminder to me not to avoid a doctor because everyone around us ascribes our health problems to our weight. And, for those who don't yet have one, finding a doctor who doesn't only see through the "fat is the problem" lens is worth all the frustration so that we can be healthiest as possible at whatever weight we are!

I just wanted to chime in and say I'm a cortisone success story too! I had an impingement in my left shoulder that was severe from August of last year through the winter. It was awkward and painful to put on my coat or get dressed in the morning, I couldn't reach up or back with my left arm without severe pain.

Finally I saw a doctor and he gave me a shot of cortisone that provided instant and dramatic pain relief. I know multiple cortisone shots can cause deterioration but that one shot gave me the relief I needed to go into physical therapy and really allow my shoulder to be stretched. I did the exercises at home—still do—and returned to the doctor triumphant.

He admitted I had made great progress but still thought I should have surgery; what he often sees, he said, was progress at first, then the shoulder re-freezes. I said No thanks, that I'd be back if it froze up again but till then I was going to continue my exercises, ice, and stretching.

They are so full of shit sometimes.

[Gemme]

I'm a pear shape; definitely bottom heavy.

[nycfem]

I listened to this again (Thanks LWF) and appreciate the scientific pov so much. We do much needless damage to our minds, bodies, and souls by focusing on dieting and weight loss instead of focusing on being healthy if we want to be healthy. Furthermore, fat is a feminist issue, and women spend so much time together critiquing ourselves and sharing exactly what we are eating to further our weight loss all day. I was reading this great article

http://www.oprah.com/spirit/How-One-Woman-Learned-to-Love-Being-Fat/1

and thinking about how much time is lost to dieting, especially for women. This is supposed to be a feminist site and yet women are congratulated for losing weight, whether that method is healthy or not. Women, for instance, go long periods eating 800 calories a day or even eat 500 calories a day while injecting themselves with a pregnancy hormone. We "thank" them, as long as they are losing weight. One reason that I started this thread is because of how I see "weight loss" being substituted for "health," which may or may not have weight loss as a side effect. I find it easy myself to fall into the "thinspiration" perspective and all the petting that one receives confessing to being "bad" with eating and all the accolades one receives losing any amount of weight. I'm really trying not to these days. As a feminist, this is something I feel strongly about. I know this is not the prevailing view on this site and that this thread is not a popular one, but I deeply appreciate those who have read and contributed. It doesn't matter to me whether people who come here are thin or fat or whether they are on a diet or not on a diet. I just like that there is any interest at all in a perspective that even considers that in our patriarchal culture we perpetuate an anti-woman, anti-fat bias by focusing so much time and energy and celebration of weight loss which we all too easily equate with "health."

nFwgEevvncs

[LeftWriteFemme]

YDakFfLQDF4&feature=related

[aishah]

i'm extremely grateful for nycfembbw & leftwritefemme's posts :)

nycfembbw, your post reminded me of this article...
http://healthateverysizeblog.wordpress.com/2011/10/17/the-haes-files-can-i-love-my-body-and-still-want-to-lose-weight/

it made me take a really hard look at myself and what i mean when i say i love my body.

[1QuirkyKiwi]

I saw this article about BMI and the increasing belief within the Medical profession, who are calling it the Baloney Mass Index, and think it’s out dated…

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-2129695/Body-Mass-Index-The-Baloney-Mass-Index-Official-tests-said-people-worryingly-overweight-detailed-checks-showed-VERY-different-results.html

I posted this in the Body-Positive: We Are ALL Worthy (no diet or weight-loss talk) thread in October last year… http://www.butchfemmeplanet.com/forum/showpost.php?p=446278&postcount=105

One of my best friends is only slightly over weight and is Diabetic and has high Blood Pressure and has had for many years. She’s younger than me by 4 years and yet is very active. When I told her my blood results and BP she jokingly told me I was terrible….. She also told me not to let those results go to my head in the belief I could eat junk foods and get away with it, lol!

I wonder, how much of this is me being vegan for nearly 30 years and how much is my Genetics…?!

[LeftWriteFemme]

i'm extremely grateful for nycfembbw & leftwritefemme's posts :)

nycfembbw, your post reminded me of this article...
http://healthateverysizeblog.wordpress.com/2011/10/17/the-haes-files-can-i-love-my-body-and-still-want-to-lose-weight/

it made me take a really hard look at myself and what i mean when i say i love my body.


Great article!

It makes me think of my mom who lost 130 pounds a number of years ago and spends her life fighting the pounds that creep back. She reduces her food intake and increases her exercise and still those pounds will not go away and they consume her thoughts, her days and eliminate any possible happiness she might have over being thin because of just what the article says, that thin privilege is slipping away from her......it's so sad.

[LeftWriteFemme]

http://a7.sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-ash3/s320x320/558613_400974659921727_100000275898134_1455315_211 2621088_n.jpg

just saw this on facebook and though I'd post it here...I know, preaching to the choir

[LeftWriteFemme]

A culture fixated on female thinness is not an obsession about female beauty. It is an obsession about female obedience.

~ Naomi Wolf

[nycfem]

This is so very true.

A culture fixated on female thinness is not an obsession about female beauty. It is an obsession about female obedience.

~ Naomi Wolf

[Breezy]

Hi, I'm Breezy. I am BBW and have no intention of ever being thin. I'm new here so I hope jumping in like this is ok.Thank you.

[Soft*Silver]

jen sent me a lovely card, with a photo of a naked BBW on it. Its so tastefully done and I adore the photo, so I hung it on the wall next to my desk as art.

It is also the area I spend time with consigners. Some are notably uncomfortable and do all they can to avert their eyes. Some smile as they notice it. Others dont make any facial gestures and thankfully, none have gone screaming from the room. (do any of you remember the article on "what not to do when you meet a lesbian? That last phrase was taken from there..lol)

I plan on getting more art. Clothes and naked. I am discovering that there is a puzzle of responses I get from this photo and I want to offer my customers and visitors ample opportunity to respond to all kinds of shapes. I think we are so bombarded with thinness, we cant see fat as just another shape. We see it in judgemental terms. Bad. Ugly. Distorted. Lazy. And we of size, know these arent true.

Do you have postcards, posters, greeting cards, etc of Positive Women? (the plus sign + means positive, right?) Can you send me some more? PM me for my address if you can...

[1QuirkyKiwi]

Hi, I'm Breezy. I am BBW and have no intention of ever being thin. I'm new here so I hope jumping in like this is ok.Thank you.

Hello Breezy and welcome! :)

Feel free to jump right in, we all did! :cheesy: Our Sofa's are comfy and the company is great..... Oh! And there's Chocolate, too! ;)

[1QuirkyKiwi]

jen sent me a lovely card, with a photo of a naked BBW on it. Its so tastefully done and I adore the photo, so I hung it on the wall next to my desk as art.

It is also the area I spend time with consigners. Some are notably uncomfortable and do all they can to avert their eyes. Some smile as they notice it. Others dont make any facial gestures and thankfully, none have gone screaming from the room. (do any of you remember the article on "what not to do when you meet a lesbian? That last phrase was taken from there..lol)

I plan on getting more art. Clothes and naked. I am discovering that there is a puzzle of responses I get from this photo and I want to offer my customers and visitors ample opportunity to respond to all kinds of shapes. I think we are so bombarded with thinness, we cant see fat as just another shape. We see it in judgemental terms. Bad. Ugly. Distorted. Lazy. And we of size, know these arent true.

Do you have postcards, posters, greeting cards, etc of Positive Women? (the plus sign + means positive, right?) Can you send me some more? PM me for my address if you can...

Having BBW Art on display sounds like a fantastic Idea! :) You saying this reminded me of a woman I worked with a few years ago, who wanted some BBW Art for her bedroom. I hand embroidered two naked BBW's on Cushion covers for her.

A work in progress for myself is hand embroidered naked BBW Art in various poses with bullion Roses on the Bellies, Thighs, Bum and Breasts. In storage I have pencil drawings of Naked and semi-naked BBW Art.

I'll keep a look out for the various cards.

[Breezy]

Hello Breezy and welcome! :)

Feel free to jump right in, we all did! :cheesy: Our Sofa's are comfy and the company is great..... Oh! And there's Chocolate, too! ;)


Thank you 1QuirkyKiwi! I look forward to knowing you all.

:rrose:

[LeftWriteFemme]

I want to preface this post by saying I have not read this article. If it says something horrible and obnoxious I apologize , but I don't have the time to read it and didn't want to risk forgetting about it and not giving all of you the opportunity to read it if you have the time and desire.....it's a 3 pager

The Politics of Fat: We Have to Keep Struggling to Liberate Ourselves from Self-Hatred



http://www.alternet.org/story/154850/the_politics_of_fat:_we_have_to_keep_struggling_to _liberate_ourselves_from_self-hatred

[1QuirkyKiwi]

I want to preface this post by saying I have not read this article. If it says something horrible and obnoxious I apologize , but I don't have the time to read it and didn't want to risk forgetting about it and not giving all of you the opportunity to read it if you have the time and desire.....it's a 3 pager

The Politics of Fat: We Have to Keep Struggling to Liberate Ourselves from Self-Hatred



http://www.alternet.org/story/154850/the_politics_of_fat:_we_have_to_keep_struggling_to _liberate_ourselves_from_self-hatred

Interesting article! We're still a long way off Fat Acceptance; we have celebrities of size who then diet and lose weight after stating that they are happy with their bodies and size. Fair enough if their weight is causing health issues, then all bets are off! But, woman and teenage girls are getting mixed signals from celebrities and with the media constantly bombarding us with images of very slim models and celebrities, how can women feel secure enought to accept themselves when plus size?

Marilyn Wann's FAT!SO? is a good book to read for inspiration and as a general starting point to Fat Acceptance. Why is western culture so fat phobic? And why are other cultures starting to follow these thought processes?

Just my wonderings. Thank you for posting this LWF! :)

[LeftWriteFemme]

PTlmho_RovY&feature

[LeftWriteFemme]

Okay, so I'm not sure if this has been posted before, so if it has I apologize.....but here it is!


http://adipositivity.my-expressions.com/


http://my-expressions.com/up_media/6300/pblog/9437/1333644092.jpg

[Breezy]

I LOVE this photo. I've never seen it before. Thank you for posting it.
I am built like the woman on the far right. :)

[LeftWriteFemme]

vXottBGAQp8&feature=related

[LeftWriteFemme]

All right my darlings, I know you will forgive me for not having read this yet, I hope to read it tomorrow, but I didn't want my over commitments to hold you back from having a chance to read it.......


Fat and Fucking by Rebecca Jorden

http://www.smittenkittenonline.com/blog/04/sexandthebody/fat-and-fucking-by-rebecca-jorden

[clay]

just stopping by to admire all the ladies here.....I LOVE this place...and I could just stay here forever, however, I must get some sleep....just stopped by to say goodnight to the most alluring, sensual, and incredibly beautiful women I know.....siggghhh...you are ALL hearts stoppers for me....smiles...gawd I love BBW's....ask my GF....grins....:wine:
I heart each and every one of you...Clay
PS Miss Scarlett you stole my heart! wink

[not2shygrrl]

WOW......tripped on this vid and had to share it here. I remember singing this when I was a young teenager and thinking at the time how cool that the roller derby queen's buddies called her Spike!! I think I still have a crush on all 5'6" @ 215lb of her !! {wink}

Jim Croce - Roller Derby Queen (Live) [remastered 16:9] - YouTube

[LeftWriteFemme]

I feel this speaks so strongly to the issues of fat and the way that fat people are viewed in this society

http://sphotos.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-snc7/303394_3815685361434_1556587325_3152937_253410955_ n.jpg

[LeftWriteFemme]

http://sphotos.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ash3/s320x320/536388_339739859423087_132957943434614_932960_9849 71565_n.jpg

[nycfem]

Here's a link to Tasha Fierce's blog, Sex and the Fat Girl:

http://www.sexandthefatgirl.com/

It has lots of great links and of course, Tasha's fierce writing!

[nycfem]

http://30.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lovhpcPtaW1r0vqjoo1_400.jpg

[nycfem]

Happy Saturday Night to everyone!

Here's one more link that I enjoy, especially useful to those new to fat acceptance:

http://corpulent.wordpress.com/2010/08/31/new-to-fat-acceptance/

[Licious]

Been absent due to illness. Nice to see the great posts in here, keep it up. :)

[LeftWriteFemme]

ZsNlcr4frs4

[1QuirkyKiwi]

ZsNlcr4frs4

They live in a town north of me; I've heard him sing "On the Street Where You Live" from My Fair Lady with just a Piano accompaniment, he was brilliant! My favourite version is Nat King Cole's. ;)

[1QuirkyKiwi]

ZsNlcr4frs4

I searched and found Jonathan singing "On the Street Where You Live". N7Cxvsdh6tc&feature=related

[Licious]

They live in a town north of me; I've heard him sing "On the Street Where You Live" from My Fair Lady with just a Piano accompaniment, he was brilliant! My favourite version is Nat King Cole's. ;)

Heard of him but first time seeing it. Electrifying. How beautiful and what a great lesson for me, as I still try to get my confidence up. Thank you LEFT WRITE and Kiwi for post and comments.

[LeftWriteFemme]

ZsNlcr4frs4



The reason I posted this is because I was/am furious that the whispered opening comments by that reprehensible Simon Cowl are subtitled in, nothing else is subtitled in.......and then he's all benevolent when this kid proves to be a huge talent and not just huge, fuck Simon Cowl! (It seems that I am still angry about this.....carry on with whatever you were doing, I'll calm down eventually)

[1QuirkyKiwi]

The reason I posted this is because I was/am furious that the whispered opening comments by that reprehensible Simon Cowl are subtitled in, nothing else is subtitled in.......and then he's all benevolent when this kid proves to be a huge talent and not just huge, fuck Simon Cowl! (It seems that I am still angry about this.....carry on with whatever you were doing, I'll calm down eventually)

Simon Cowl is as transparent as your Bank Manager's smile and equally as smarmy! I can't stand the man and the way he treats others; besides Jonathan could diet, but, there's no surgery yet, for a personality or decent human being transplant!

[Leigh]

Yeah Simon thinks he's so wonderful, yet he makes comments sometimes that baffle me to no end

[Licious]

I would love to add some of the marvelous Lounge people to my fb if they are so inclined... please PM me if that sounds agreeable.

Have a good Sunday evening all *hugs*

[1QuirkyKiwi]

jDVUyy0ko1w
Jonathan Antoine is in the final of BGT after a great performance of Caruso. Jonathan’s voice sounds like the Welsh bass-baritone Bryn Terfel, who often sings with Andrea Bocelli.
HfBhrgwIXT4

[LeftWriteFemme]

Have any of you read this article?

http://www.plus-model-mag.com/2012/05/fat-do-people-have-the-right-to-call-you-fat/

[1QuirkyKiwi]

Have any of you read this article?

http://www.plus-model-mag.com/2012/05/fat-do-people-have-the-right-to-call-you-fat/

I've just read it and was filled with anger at the way this lady was treated by a so called friend. It came across as he was jealous of her keeping fit and active despite her size. To him fit and healthy is slim. I admire her for speaking out and writing the article and having the courage to say how she felt.

Personally, I see her a gorgeous and having a zest for life. I hope she doesn't feel the need to conform to the "Thin is in" mentality.

[LeftWriteFemme]

u69cGebScFk&feature=related

[Soft*Silver]

I am going to be able to open my store in the larger store instead of the smaller one! My landlord is almost done fixing up the bigger store and offered me the option to move in there. That would mean delaying the grand opening a couple more weeks. But I am already a month late so a couple more weeks wont hurt. So, I will have 4 times the floor space, and its a much more pretty site too!

I just want to open already! I have so many wonderful women wanting to come in and shop, meet other Positive Women (I call plus sized women because in math, the plus size means Positive!) and enjoy space meant just for them!

Did you know 60% of American women are above the average weight? I just got that statistic from the library research I did today..I will post more stats as i run across them!

[LeftWriteFemme]

Fun, Fattery and Fringe with Love Your Body-Detroit


http://dailyvenusdiva.com/2011/07/21/fun-fattery-and-fringe-with-love-your-body-detroit/

[LeftWriteFemme]

uZVxjH04aIY
I don't know why, but this song always makes me tear up

[1QuirkyKiwi]

Real girls post their 'fatkini' pictures in protest against society's obsession with 'beach-ready bodies'

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-2149540/Real-girls-post-fatkini-pictures-protest-societys-obsession-beach-ready-bodies.html


http://i830.photobucket.com/albums/zz228/earthmonkey1968/article-2149540-1346D490000005DC-304_634x766.jpg


http://i830.photobucket.com/albums/zz228/earthmonkey1968/article-2149540-1346D4A0000005DC-885_634x997.jpg


http://i830.photobucket.com/albums/zz228/earthmonkey1968/article-2149540-1346D489000005DC-620_634x456.jpg

[Leigh]

Those are amazing pictures hun, its about time society got used to seeing us girls out in society and not just skinny gals. I have nothing against anyone's body size, every woman is beautiful in her own way, but when all you see is what society always thinks is "acceptable" the rest of us get lost in the crowd

[Soft*Silver]

I was getting sooo frustrated over this store opening. Mostly, about my landlord switching places on me, and not doing the renovations as promised. He has literally delayed my grand opening by three months! I was suppose to meet with him tonight and he "forgot"...probably because he was suppose to be making progress and nothing was done.

So tonight I went and rented a different location. Same plaza, but a MUCH bigger store front. And its so feminine and charming, old casablanca type fans, gorgeous historic ceiling tiles, and even has a balcony inside, where I can put mannequins. And best of all, its in move in condition! I can start moving my things in the first of June and be ready to open as soon as its all hung and ticketed!

What a relief! After so many ups and downs, I feel this is the best move. And I can get my pretty ladies their store that they have been patiently waiting for!

[Licious]

Thanks for the Pics, Kiwi! Those are great!

And good luck with the opening, Miss Tia, keep us posted.

I am still learning to love myself the way I am at this point in my life and I appreciate this thread. Thank you.

I found a pic that looked fun and happy, so I am sharing.

http://www.mrbestguide.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/03/Clothing-For-Obese-Women.jpg

[Leigh]

I just love the pictures that are being shared, makes me proud to be a bbw and to celebrate all of my curves :)

[nycfem]

Hope everyone is having a lovely weekend!

Please remember you are not "being bad" when you eat something with substance to it.

Don't assume that telling women they lost weight is a compliment.


Don't assume my or any woman's body is your business. E.G. "Are you pregnant?", "You don't look like a BBW to me," and the ever present, "Did you lose weight?"

From a feminist perspective, is it meaningful for women to spend our time together talking about what we ate in measurements throughout the day? Is there anything more meaningful that we could discuss?


Keep up the fat positivity and be fierce, my friends!

http://curvature.files.wordpress.com/2007/05/girth-1.jpg

http://www.rmichelson.com/Artist_Pages/Nimoy/pages/MaxBeaut.htm

[nycfem]

Check out this plus size fashion slide show! Who says full-figured women can't rock high fashion?


http://www.velvetography.com/galleries/volupte/index.html

http://styleproperty.files.wordpress.com/2008/10/velvet4.jpg

[clay]

stopping by to give all you beautiful people a {{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{hug}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}
Dayummm I LOVE this thread!!! Gorgeous and so decadently delish...yummm...
Happy Memorial Dayl..I heart you all..Clay....:rrose:

[LeftWriteFemme]

All I can say is Wow!!! I am thinking I'm going to be needing one of those sheer halter things with the rhinestones circles over the nipples.......

[Soft*Silver]

I had a wonderful Memorial Day with family and friends. My newly married nephew and his bride had a gathering on Sunday and like all good slovak parties, it was ripe with food. We are not timid eaters! LOL. No one ever apologizes for eating heartedly. My sister, who just had stumach surgery, could not eat, and she apologized for not being able to enjoy the food! What a twist for most parties!

I spent Monday working on my third draft of the business plan, submitted to BVR for my funding. I am so proud of it! It reads so well and is a well thought out, thoroughly researched proposal. It is a formality, for they are funding me, but it still had to be done correctly.

and today I put the utilities in my name! I will be able to open mid June! I feel as though I can reach my arm out and actually touch the Grand Opening!

I am loving this thread. I have shared parts of it in my group for the store. I thank you for the lovely images and articles!

[Soft*Silver]

The utilities are in my name for the store and I get the keys on Friday! I have teams of volunteers, customers from my shop and friends and family, coming on saturday and Sunday in shifts to help me move everything from one location to the next. We literally have to walk it up the sidewalk two stores! LOL. The store will be moved and I can finish ticketing and set up my displays and yes, yes, we can open by the 15th!

I am overwhelmed by my customers, who are keeping track of things via my FB group for the store. I have been asked what things I need for the store and they are all trying to figure out what they have to bring to me. The support that is being offered is not like any other I have witnessed before. And its not about me. Its about "us". They want to create a place that is sacred for "us", us wonderful plus sized, curvacious, ample bodied lovelies who have felt isolated and condemned as sojourners for so long...

I am really humbled by all of this...

[Licious]

Thanks for all the pics and articles to read, very encouraging.

I am so happy for you Miss Tia, congrats! Be sure to get pics of the opening for us.

[Leigh]

This thread is truly amazing :)

[Soft*Silver]

I am suppose to get newspaper and tv coverage for my grand opening. So i will make sure I link to those things when they happen.

I dont know if this is permissible or not..please just delete it if its not allowed, but...

I am looking for lace curtains. I need several for windows, alcoves, off the balcony, in the fitting rooms...if anyone has one or a few they would care to sell or donate please let me know. Valances, panels and tiers are all needed and I dont need them to match, they just have to be lace...

[nycfem]

"If you can't imagine fat people being healthy...that's YOUR pathology!"
-from http://blogs.sfweekly.com/exhibitionist/2012/05/weight_of_the_nation_fat_shaming.php
by Marilyn Wann

http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-uEEYP13amQE/TmS5ewGR9hI/AAAAAAAAATg/Hze8Skh8KEk/s1600/YayYou-scale-by-Marilyn-Wann.jpg

[Soft*Silver]

I am so sore...I have been working at the store every day for several hours a day, setting it up, bringing in new consignments, ticketing displaying, etc. I am not opened yet, but I keep the front door open so I can get a breeze into the shop. I had several people walk in to see the shop today! I have found out my shop is the talk of all the VFWs in the area, as well as the weight loss groups and the beauty shops! Holy Moses! People I dont know are telling me how excited everyone is, how closets are being gone through, how pennies are being pinched so they can come buy, how happy they are to have a place that is all theirs! One woman, after five minutes in my store, grabbed my hand and held onto it and started to cry.

This is overwhelming for me. I knew on FB and other internet areas (like here) have been very supportive and excited about the store, but to get it in real life, direct from people in front of me, is truly, literally, overwhelming.

As I said, I am so sore. Every part of my body aches and my legs feel like they are on fire. But its so worth it. Once the store is assembled, the work load is so different. Not so much laborious. More details. Like ticketing, sorting, etc.

I sent a press release to our local LGBT Pride Center. Its going into the newsletter and hopefully on their web site, that my store is opening and welcoming to the LGBT community. I specifically invited the trans folks to come in, MtF, and I would welcome them especially. I have a special day with special hours just for them. Once I get the women's section done, I am adding on the male clothing line too...for bio mens, transmen and butches to shop.

I love my life right now. It is so full...

[Leigh]

I'm not surprised Tia, your an amazing woman and I'm proud to be able to count you among my dearest friends :heartbeat:

[Soft*Silver]

awwww...sweetie, thank you so much! Love you too!


I'm not surprised Tia, your an amazing woman and I'm proud to be able to count you among my dearest friends :heartbeat:

[Leigh]

awwww...sweetie, thank you so much! Love you too!


Your still my cheerleader, and I'll always be in your corner :)

[Soft*Silver]

I need to clarify something I wrote. When I said I have a special day and time for MtFs to come to the store, that doesnt mean they arent welcome at any time in the store. I said it much better in my press release! LOL. Some MtFs, especially those just transitioning, arent comfortable going out in public in female form. Thats why I have the special day and special hours for them. But I dont care if they hang out all day any day with me! Whatever their comfort level!

[nycfem]

"It remains a radical act to be fat and happy in America…Being publicly fat and happy is hard; being publicly, shamelessly, unshakably fat and happy is an act of both will and bravery."– Melissa McEwan

http://goteaminternet.com/img/docs/43208.jpg
Beth Ditto

[nycfem]

http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lwxl8cDbhP1r6ofspo1_500.png

http://cdn.indulgy.com/M5/Ml/c7/206602701625568739UWi4DfNoc.jpg

[LeftWriteFemme]

http://www.thecontrarianmedia.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/07/fat.jpg

No Fatties, Please. Fatties, Welcome! Weight & Hollywood’s Double Standard

http://www.thecontrarianmedia.com/2010/07/no-fatties-please-fatties-welcome-weight-hollywoods-double-standard/

[Soft*Silver]

Are you tired of hearing about the store yet? Today I got in my desk, and some tables, and a bookcase. I also had delivered an electric sign, more fixtures, metal sign stands, a shoe rack seat, and a HUGE mirror, easily 10"' tall! Its enormous! I want women to look in this mirror and feel like a queen!

Every day I am at the store, people walk in and tell me how excited they are that I am opening. This is so amazing to me. All I did was put up a sign and start setting up business and word has traveled amongst the plus size women in my area! They are walking in, making appointments to consign clothes, and taking a tour of the place. They grab a fistful of business cards and away they go, to tell even more people.

Why has no one thought of doing this before? The response to my presence is intense!

I spent the day tagging tiaras! I got in 21 tiaras! I am going to wear one every day I am there! I love it! Who doesnt want to feel like a princess? LOL

I had a meeting with a guy who buys storage lockers...just like the people in Storage Wars. He supplies the best consignment shop in the area (for non plus size women. Mine is the best for plus size women!) with the name brand clothes he gets from those storage rooms. He hasnt had a place to sell the plus sizes and is extremely excited to do business with me! He is passing my name onto the other people who do this too, to get them involved with my store.

Holy Moses! This is getting really exciting and I am so close to opening! I am having a premiere party on the 20th of June for my group members and consignors. Then July 1st I have my grand opening for the public!

I love my life right now!

[nycfem]

Cool and Useful Merchandise for Big People

http://www.casagordita.com/otherstuff.htm

Worth checking out - some fun links!

[Soft*Silver]

I SO want her!!!! jen, you have created a wish list for me by posting those links! I am also sharing them on my shop's group page!

http://voluptuart.com/wind-p-79.html

[Soft*Silver]

I have had an incredible week at the shop! Its all coming together very well and while I am exhausted, I am thrilled and just cant stop obsessing over what to do next!

Just a few more days and it will be my Premiere Gathering. I invited a small group of people to come in, shop and tour the shop. And then I hand them an evaluation to fill out before they leave. I want to know what they think I did right, and what needs improved. I will take their suggestions and do them before my grand opening!

I now have a rounder of sexy underthings. Corsets, bras, teddies, camisoles, garter belts, etc. All either new or used once/tried on and didnt like for themselves. I even have a hot cop costume! I love it!

One of my biggest thrills is when mothers bring their daughters in. They turn them loose in the store and the kids go wild, so excited to find a whole store just for them! Hoodies, man, I could sell a dozen hoodies a day! LOL. Moms sit in the back, enjoying the comfy area, while the kids pick out clothes. And boy do they BUY! I had three separate families come in this week and from them alone, I can pay next months rent! But the real joy is watching mom be happy instead of shopping with daughters who are miserable because they cant find anything to wear. Or they buy things too tight just to have something. One daughter kept wanting to buy things that were not buttonable, or she couldnt get the zipper up. I had to talk to her about how important it was to look her best, and to do so, best fit is more important than having "something" I assured her so much more was coming in and that she was going to be able to find ALOT of clothes that fit her much better over time. Mom gave me a thumbs up. And the daughter took a shine to me, glad I think, that I wanted her to look good, and not just buy.

I love my life. I love my store...

[Licious]

http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lwxl8cDbhP1r6ofspo1_500.png

http://cdn.indulgy.com/M5/Ml/c7/206602701625568739UWi4DfNoc.jpg



I have been putting my life on hold. Still having problems with that.... Thank you all so much, you are such inspiration and comfort.

Tia your work with your shop is amazing, and I so admire you.

Well, that's all I have to say for now... I read this every time a post...

[Soft*Silver]

My photos are up in my gallery!

[LeftWriteFemme]

My photos are up in my gallery!


Wow, the pictures look great! Congratulations!!!! Wishing you all the best with your fabulous store!!!

[Soft*Silver]

The Premiere Gathering went very well! I got alot of visitors, and they filled out evaluations, ate cookies, shopped, stayed to visit, met each other, laughed, swapped phone numbers, became friends! It was wonderful! Everything I hoped it would be! Such joy!

And I am exhausted! The shop looked wonderful, the racks were full, the place was spotless! One of my customers brought in "P" shaped cookies, in pink and green, for my colors of Pretty and Plus! That was so thoughful and caring!

I am going to play mahjong all day and take the day off from the shop and tomorrow, hit the racks and get ready for the grand opening!

[*Anya*]

The Premiere Gathering went very well! I got alot of visitors, and they filled out evaluations, ate cookies, shopped, stayed to visit, met each other, laughed, swapped phone numbers, became friends! It was wonderful! Everything I hoped it would be! Such joy!

And I am exhausted! The shop looked wonderful, the racks were full, the place was spotless! One of my customers brought in "P" shaped cookies, in pink and green, for my colors of Pretty and Plus! That was so thoughful and caring!

I am going to play mahjong all day and take the day off from the shop and tomorrow, hit the racks and get ready for the grand opening!

MT: your store looks awesome! What a major accomplishment to open your own business! I just love when women do this!

Kudos to you and I wish you much success!

{{{ Hugs! }}}

[Breezy]

Popping in to say hello. I hope you are doing fabulously! :rrose:

[Soft*Silver]

I had a young woman come in today, who was floored that there was a plus size shop in our area. She got on her cell phone and promptly started calling all her friends...as she spoke to them, her other friends started calling her too, because the friends she had just called had called other friends and they were all calling her to find out about this store..lol. It was SO wonderful! We were laughing and giggling together like crazy! Her phone lit up like a 4th of July evening!

She is coming back in tomorrow and bringing some friends with her. I cannot wait! This is going to be so much fun! She has a super personality and I just know we are going to hit it off as friends as well as customers...

[Licious]

I had a young woman come in today, who was floored that there was a plus size shop in our area. She got on her cell phone and promptly started calling all her friends...as she spoke to them, her other friends started calling her too, because the friends she had just called had called other friends and they were all calling her to find out about this store..lol. It was SO wonderful! We were laughing and giggling together like crazy! Her phone lit up like a 4th of July evening!

She is coming back in tomorrow and bringing some friends with her. I cannot wait! This is going to be so much fun! She has a super personality and I just know we are going to hit it off as friends as well as customers...



Yay! Go Tia!

[LeftWriteFemme]

Please forgive me, but I can't resist posting these Graham Norton clips.....

tm45OksOsrw

[LeftWriteFemme]

I have NO idea what show this is, but I thought the dancer is super cool!

SlG-j_lkm74

[Soft*Silver]

One of my customers just sent me this..its what she wrote for our area paper. I didnt know she was a writer for our newspaper! Holy Moses!

With great anticipation, a new store will be opening soon in the Mahoning Valley . The Pretty and Plus Shop, a consignment and resale store catering to Plus size Women, the first of its kind in the area, will be opening July 7, 2012 at 8 State Street in Struthers, Ohio. The store carries clothes sizes large, up to 6x in women’s clothing, as well as accessories, jewelry, and shoes. The Pretty and Plus Shop will also have a small selection of plus-sized men’s clothing and accessories .

Proprietress, Teah Keshock-Crew, states This store is here to help “as well as support women of ample size. We often feel slighted by those of smaller sizes. From childhood to adulthood, we can be victimized by cruelty of strangers and even those we love. My store's credo is we are so much more than just numbers. We are not our dress size, nor how many pounds we weigh, not even our age matters when it comes to measuring our worth. Our value lies within us and how we live our lives...not what size pants we put on! So here is a happy place to come, to feel welcomed and appreciated. We are SO beautiful...and we celebrate our size-diversity!”

The store itself offers many amenities not found in other retail shops! There is a comfortable seating area to sit and meet other consigners/customers, as well as have a cup of free tea or coffee. A play area for children with games and books to keep them occupied while moms shop! Even a rocking chair and a changing table to make moms lives easier! The shop will even have some helpers this summer to keep an eye on the children!

The store will open in July, but Ms Keshock-Crew is now accepting consignments by appointment.

“I had a lady come in today, for the first time. She was so excited that the whole time she was in the shop, she was calling her friends and family, telling them all about the shop! Not only do they want to buy, they have lots of clothes they want to consign too...party clothes, chillin' clothes, church clothes, work clothes! Her enthusiasm with her friends on the phone just tickled me to no end! THIS is exactly why I opened this store! They were all so excited about having a place, an entire place, for our sizes!’ Ms Keshock-Crews stated.

For more information on the store or consignment information, contact (Contact info). There is also a face book group listed under The Pretty and Plus Shop

[LeftWriteFemme]

XBrgtZUBUQE

[LeftWriteFemme]

UjAT93BY6Tg&feature=related

[Soft*Silver]

hah! We are having a beach party all of July at the Pretty & Plus Shop! I have a huge arch that goes over the doorway that is filled with moss and ferns and lights and star fish, fishnetting, etc. The window displays will be filled with sand and seashells and bathing attire and picnic baskets! All summer wear will be 25% off and anyone who sends me a photo to put on my FB group gets 50% off one item! I cant wait! Its going to be wild!

I am SO not ashamed of my fat body in a swimsuit! Let 'em see me! As if clothes ever covers up bulk! Clothes dont make us thinner...anymore than baggy clothes makes a thin person heavier! Its just an illusion to the wearer...so once we accept that, we can either accept what size we are and agree that whatever we wear reflects that size, or we do something to change that size and not pretend clothes can make that difference...

so...me, size 18...is taking photos this week in bathing suits and gonna post them for the world to see! Happy me! And Imma an old woman who is saucily gonna be eating a hot dog in the photos...

dont call me old or fat like its they are bad things...if you only knew what this body knows, you would bow down and revere me....lol

[LeftWriteFemme]

h-BxWV77MGc

I think this girl may be or have gone on to drink the :koolaid: but I thought the blog was good none the less

[LeftWriteFemme]

SNMZRvkLP_s


I think this girl is awesome and I love how her family is her family and embraces who she is!

[Rockinonahigh]

SNMZRvkLP_s


I think this girl is awesome and I love how her family is her family and embraces who she is!


Wow,is all I can say.

[Leigh]

I absolutely LOVE this thread :)

[LeftWriteFemme]

http://www.latinconnoisseur.com/images/BOTERO_THURMBAIL_CLEAR.jpg


http://api.photoshop.com/home_707f499721b3453a94f70932e0a44ddf/adobe-px-assets/3721001b486b4607952ab9d3b468de16

http://madamepickwickartblog.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/06/fat5.jpg

Just 'cause.......

[nycfem]

http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-81qbSpCU8dk/T_ix2JP_grI/AAAAAAAAT5k/nnldFU-or08/s1600/exuberantlyobese.jpg

[LeftWriteFemme]

http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-81qbSpCU8dk/T_ix2JP_grI/AAAAAAAAT5k/nnldFU-or08/s1600/exuberantlyobese.jpg


I've got to say, this made me laugh! Being fat doesn't make me morbid, it was my childhood that makes me morbid!!!

[Licious]

http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-81qbSpCU8dk/T_ix2JP_grI/AAAAAAAAT5k/nnldFU-or08/s1600/exuberantlyobese.jpg


Thank you. I am still struggling with my larger size, and working to love myself and be nice to my body. I want to hide it, I don't want to spend money buying myself *thinking of my body as it, don't want to buy it* nice clothes, have trouble feeling attractive or very sexy, frankly. You women are inspiring! I appreciate this thread so much.

[Licious]

This made me choke up a bit, couldn't help it.


?v=2Q7IzwUa_kI

[LeftWriteFemme]

?v=2Q7IzwUa_kI



What I want to know.....what I really need to figure out is why in all the dozens of times I have listened to this before I never.....ever..... heard the words, "full bodied" I think it must be some kind of a block and I have to tell you that when I listened to this before I always imagined that Ivan was speaking of 'gay twiggy'........I was so wrong. Sometimes it is a blessing to be wrong.

Thank you Licious for giving me an opportunity to see the error of my ways!

[nycfem]

This was such a delight to watch! How did you even find this?

UjAT93BY6Tg&feature=related

[nycfem]

LMAO! This was so smart, funny, and feminist! Loved it!

XBrgtZUBUQE

[Soft*Silver]

tomorrow is the grand opening of my plus sized clothing store. I am exhausted. I have spent the last few days working 9 to 12 hours each day. Not alot for most of you, but for me and my disabilities, its horrible on my poor body. But I wouldnt miss this for anything! It has been so wonderful doing this, meeting everyone, getting such wonderful support, and hearing so many stories from women!

I need to go to bed. I have an early day tomorrow and even tho I have insomnia, by god, I am sleeping tonight! LOL

[Soft*Silver]

the grand opening was more than I ever hoped for! We had tons of customers and sold lots of clothes and so many people made appts to bring in clothes to consign! People loved the shop, and promised to come back again and bring friends with them! From teens to eldery ladies, they all came. I was so proud of my store!

My sister and my niece came for support. Bless their hearts. I couldnt have done this without my family and friends who have been there for me. Including this forum! I will be posting photos later, of the incredible art work the Scrapbooking thread folks made for the store. It says "you are so beautiful" and I have it across the bannisters in the back, so that when people walk in, they see the sign greeting them. Its LOVELY!

I am home, feet up, relaxing. I am BEAT. LOL. But I am so tickled that my store is finally opened!

[LeftWriteFemme]

I ran across these.......thought they were sweet....but the name of the ad campaign caused me to post them here

http://adsoftheworld.com/files/images/eggplant.preview.jpg
http://bp0.blogger.com/_KYXmcfChca4/SGmZ8T6wj_I/AAAAAAAAERE/rMIvNpuc2Ns/s400/MagimixXLFoodProcesor+Grey+Israel.jpg

http://www.designboom.com/weblog/cat/13/view/3245/big-is-in-ad-campaign.html

[Leigh]

I'm starting to really embrace my size, its a slow process but I'm gonna get there no matter how long it takes me :)

[Soft*Silver]

it happened again. And older woman came into my store and after she had touched (and I mean that..touched, not gone through) three racks, she turned to me with tears in her eyes and said "I am so glad you are here"

this astounds me every time.

It also astounds me when I ask women what size they are, so i can help them look, sometimes their faces change, like I just insulted them. I asked them for a number. Not if they had masturbated that morning. But I might as well have! Fear, anger, shame, fierce self protectiveness from cruelty....man it all races across their face. I have learned to hold their eyes and smile...softly...not too much because then it becomes obscene. A soft smile with soft eyes, as tho to say "ease up missus, I mean you no harm"

and sure enough, they ease up. They realize they are safe to say that number out loud. No one is going to laugh. Or taunt. Or sneer. Nor shame.

I watch as people pass by my window display where it is written what sizes we carry. Women sometimes stop in, but sometimes, I see the look change from curious, to that innate sense of fight or flight and they run...women who are obviously plus size. These women, I figure, are so out of body, they cannot even conceive of being seen reading a plus size store window....I could be misreading them but I have seen this occur several times. They turn tail and run away...

I had a dog and her owner come into the store today. Her missus didnt want to come in but I beckoned her. I need to keep a treat bowl for pups in the store!

Some children came in with mom, and they were SO EXCITED I had a play area. And were so good..they picked up after themselves. Mom was SO EXCITED she could shop without kids whining they were bored. I did good!

I had a steady flow of customers all day. My biggest fear was I would create this shop and no one would come. And the people coming, are coming in from very little advertising. Just wait until I get more marketing out there!

Life...is good.

[Beloved]

I am a lurker in this thread. I'm not considered fat, but like many women I just have body image issues. And this thread for me is more than just embracing the fact that you are fat and that there is nothing wrong with it. To me it inspires me to accept and embrace my own body, with it's many "flaws" whatever they may be. So thank you to all of you confident BBW.

Miss Tia, best of luck to you and your store. Sounds like you are enjoying yourself and the community is happy to have you.

[nycfem]

Thanks, Beloved! You and anyone, whether thin or fat or whatever size, are very welcome here to lurk or post! I just wanted to carve out a little space where someone could go to get some body positive energy and support :)

I am a lurker in this thread. I'm not considered fat, but like many women I just have body image issues. And this thread for me is more than just embracing the fact that you are fat and that there is nothing wrong with it. To me it inspires me to accept and embrace my own body, with it's many "flaws" whatever they may be. So thank you to all of you confident BBW.

Miss Tia, best of luck to you and your store. Sounds like you are enjoying yourself and the community is happy to have you.

[nycfem]

One of my favorite artists is Jan Saudek. I love his unapologetic embrace of women's "flaws." Not sure if this image will work but:

http://www.saudek.com/photos/93-01.jpg

In the same way that a scar can be seen as sexy, so too can a roll of fat or a body that has unusual proportions.

[LeftWriteFemme]

http://www.starling-fitness.com/wp-content/FatandBeautiful.jpg

http://www.starling-fitness.com/archives/2005/11/10/fat-and-beautiful/

[LeftWriteFemme]

Okay the guy who writes this is just weird and supportive in that back handed arched eyebrow sort of way......

http://i871.photobucket.com/albums/ab277/nibblypigfashion/beth-ditto-400-121108.jpgthis is Beth Ditto .....not the author of Nibbly Pig

http://nibblypig.wordpress.com/2009/07/17/2-fat-girls-and-1-dd-cup/

[LeftWriteFemme]

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