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Kobi
05-10-2012, 04:31 PM
TIME‘s newest cover image — of a woman breastfeeding her 3-year-old son — is causing quite a stir.

The magazine’s cover story addresses the issue of attachment parenting, saying that the popular method, promoted by Dr. Bill Sears, “drives some mothers to the extremes.”

But before most people have had a chance to read the actual story, they are reacting — strongly — online, on Facebook and on Twitter to the bold image of a young blonde mom nursing her son, who is standing on a chair.

“When you think of breastfeeding, you think of mothers holding their children, which was impossible with some of these older kids,” explains photographer Martin Schoeller.

“I liked the idea of having the kids standing up to underline the point that this was an uncommon situation.”



http://img2.timeinc.net/people/i/2012/cbb/blog/120521/time-magazine-300.jpg



So what do you think?

~ocean
05-10-2012, 04:50 PM
GOT MILK ?

SugarFemme
05-10-2012, 04:50 PM
As I was looking at what you posted Kobi, I commented to my daughter that Dr. William Sears is EXACTLY who I got advice from when she was born. I too practiced attachment parenting (With the exception of the long-term breast feeding) with my daughter from the time she was born. What I got from day one was a baby who slept through the night. Was never colicky. Did not throw tantrums. Was secure in her surroundings. Maybe I was lucky. But my daughter is now almost 19 and is so "together". We have a very close and loving relationship. She is fearless and smart. Takes on challenges and is always striving for better. She is open, aware of those around her and a gentle soul. Honestly, I give a lot of the credit to Attachment Parenting. I am so glad I bought that book before she was born.

It's a shame that all people are going to see is a Mom breastfeeding her child on the cover and react before they have read the article. Attachment Parenting is SO much more than that.

I have traveled quite a bit around the world and breast feeding is nowhere viewed the same way it is in the US. It is seen as a totally natural and normal thing and they are very accomodating. And no one is offended when a woman feeds her child in public. In the States, many times people acted offended when I was feeding my daughter in public. Their problem, not mine. I was feeding my hungry child. What is more natural than that??

Beloved
05-10-2012, 04:56 PM
Breastfeeding is natural and normal. Our culture has a disturbing view on breastfeeding. The WHO recommends breast feeding until at LEAST 2.

My motto while nursing was if you don't like it don't look. I never really covered. I covered as much as I could with my shirt but I never put a blanket over her. I was always waiting for someone to confront me but it never happened. I did get some strange looks.

Chancie
05-10-2012, 05:06 PM
Breastfeeding is natural and normal. Our culture has a disturbing view on breastfeeding. The WHO recommends breast feeding until at LEAST 2.

My motto while nursing was if you don't like it don't look. I never really covered. I covered as much as I could with my shirt but I never put a blanket over her. I was always waiting for someone to confront me but it never happened. I did get some strange looks.

I completely agree with you.

I support every mother's right to breastfeed in public.

But there's something about the Time cover which is a little disturbing to me.

It is true that I don't know anything about attachment parenting, but

The editors did choose an image where the child seems so knowing.

The_Lady_Snow
05-10-2012, 05:06 PM
I'd like to read the article first because I, me, don't view a woman breastfeeding her child odd, I think this country has issues with a womans breasts being nothing but fun bags.

Beloved
05-10-2012, 05:11 PM
Attachment parenting can mean a lot of things. Some basics are breastfeeding, co-sleeping, baby wearing, NOT doing cry-it-out, etc. Some people do some things, not others. That's just a very basic explanation.

SugarFemme
05-10-2012, 05:14 PM
http://www.attachmentparenting.org/principles/principles.php

Kobi
05-10-2012, 05:15 PM
Looking up "attachment parenting". Hard to know what they mean by "extreme" when you dont know what the philosophy is or what they they are espousing and why.

The cover picture itself seemed to have been deliberately staged to evoke a certain reaction.

Julien
05-10-2012, 05:27 PM
The cover picture itself seemed to have been deliberately staged to evoke a certain reaction.



I completely agree with you. I thought the same thing when I saw it.

Kobi
05-10-2012, 06:31 PM
Did a brief review of the theory and some of the methodology. Saw some stuff where some folks swear by it, some call it "antifeminist tryanny", some say it is unrealistic.

I dunno. Am not a parent and never aspired to be one. Just reading this stuff sucked all the energy out of me. And, I'm thinking as a 24/7-365 thing, the only thing I would be attached to is a straight jacket.

The article comes out tomorrow. Might have to go check out a copy to see what they are calling "excessive".

girl_dee
05-10-2012, 06:34 PM
the staged photo annoyed me, the story/breastfeeding does not.

grenade
05-10-2012, 07:16 PM
I nursed my baby. She never spent a night in a crib, always beside me. That's where I wanted her. She never had colic. Was an amazing baby, people would remark on how intelligent she was on a daily basis. I started weaning her at a year. I then became pregnant with my son. She had to go cold turkey at 14 months. "no mo' milk" She never left my bed and 36 weeks later we had another bed mate. I nursed him for a year. We never used bottles or formula. This was right for us. This is what felt natural. I actually had a lot of negative comments from family for nursing so long and allowing them to sleep with me. It was frustrating and cut down on my dinner party list. I still did what I felt was right for us. I'm a little embarrassed to say that they were 6 and 7 before I made then sleep in their own rooms. They'd still sleep with me now if I let them. My back and sex life will not tolerate a puppy pile anymore.

There is no perfect way to parent. We all have ideas and notions of what is best. I use my intuition and logic and hope for the best. And though I breastfed I do not judge those that choose not to. It's all about what is right for YOU and YOUR child.

Personally, I would not nurse a child as old as the one shown on the magazine. I have to wonder if the mother may be the one attached to nursing more than the child.

MissItalianDiva
05-10-2012, 07:20 PM
I personally believe some theories within the attachment parenting theory are useful but like most other things there are some things I personally disagree with such as co-sleeping but this is just my personal opinion and of course I am sure it works for others.

As for this photo on the cover. I am agitated and disappointed with Time Magazine for their poor choice. This looks as if it was intentionally done to provoke folks and of course benefit them. This is only aggravating America's lack of tolerance for breastfeeding. I will not bother to read this article and contribute to Time Magazines poor taste.

I am pro breastfeeding and don't believe it is appropriate for anyone but the mother to decide when and how a child is weaned.

grenade
05-10-2012, 07:23 PM
yeah, I'm not gonna read it either.

princessbelle
05-10-2012, 07:41 PM
My first thought when viewing this, was that Time/the media have been doing the same crap for quite a long time: shaming us, mocking us and trying to make breast feeding look or be perceived as bad or perverted.

I have not read this article but i have heard a woman speak on Attachment Parenting ideas and ideology at a woman's conference at Tenova not long ago. I found it quite fascinating and a lot of it was smart parenting, imo. I didn't agree with all of it, but so what, to each his/her own. I seriously doubt that many women would breast feed a child until the age of three. I know some do but truth be known, it's nothing new. That is the only part i have a problem with.

Is this photo another form of exploitation of women? Making breastfeeding look abnormal or strange. Maybe i'm off base here, but at first glance it appears that way to me.

always2late
05-10-2012, 07:54 PM
I breastfed my son, in public when necessary...and I totally support every woman's right to feed their child whenever and wherever they have to. After all...that is what breasts are FOR...so this stupidity about it somehow being distasteful or "obscene" for a woman to be engaging in a completely natural act is absolutely ridiculous!! That being said...I am disturbed by the cover photo. It seems it was staged to provoke a reaction and has little to do with the subject of the actual article.

PumaJ
05-10-2012, 07:57 PM
Great cover:-) Certainly goes against the image of breasts pushed by our dominant culture:-)

I'm an advocate for natural birth (unless medically contraindicated), breastfeeding on demand, & attachment parenting.

SugarFemme
05-10-2012, 08:19 PM
Setting Attachment Parenting aside....there are many women that nurse their children until 3 due to financial issues. Sometimes, that is all those children have. It is such a touchy issue to decide what is an appropriate age for a child to be weaned. I personally see nothing wrong with it. I would not do it. But I would never judge others that do.

Rockinonahigh
05-10-2012, 08:27 PM
I'm glad I dont read time mag,Its just dosent seem right to brest feed a three year old.When I had my kids I refused to brest feed them( my choice),as for brest feeding its a persons choice...but if it must be done in public do it as privatly as possable.This is my opinion only not to rain on any one elses idea of the issue.No more to be said form me.

SweetJane
05-10-2012, 09:19 PM
I was a La Leche League leader. I breastfed both of my children. Both until they were about 2 1/2. By that time it wasn't for food or antibodies as much as it was at bedtime to calm them from a busy day or when they were ill. I also practiced attachment parenting, but we never called it that---it was simply good mothering, being attentive to your child, realizing their was a reason why they cried, and putting their needs first as you slowly helped them to become very independent human beings---and both of mine were.

I did support other mothers who nursed their children far longer than that. It was their particular choice and usually varied from child to child.

I nursed my children in public, usually under a pretty shawl.

But I never could understand why some people thought even knowing what your child was doing under that shawl was somehow offensive. Especially, since some of these same people wore clothing that showed more than I ever did.

I never wanted to feed my babies in a public restroom. How would you like to have spaghetti in a bathroom?

I do think the Time cover was provocative and meant to create controversy. That's a sad shame really because it puts a lot of mothers in a bad light because they choose to nurse a child beyond a year and it casts a cloud over the content of the article about attentive mothering.

SugarFemme
05-10-2012, 09:43 PM
I agree 100% with everything you said:)




I was a La Leche League leader. I breastfed both of my children. Both until they were about 2 1/2. By that time it wasn't for food or antibodies as much as it was at bedtime to calm them from a busy day or when they were ill. I also practiced attachment parenting, but we never called it that---it was simply good mothering, being attentive to your child, realizing their was a reason why they cried, and putting their needs first as you slowly helped them to become very independent human beings---and both of mine were.

I did support other mothers who nursed their children far longer than that. It was their particular choice and usually varied from child to child.

I nursed my children in public, usually under a pretty shawl.

But I never could understand why some people thought even knowing what your child was doing under that shawl was somehow offensive. Especially, since some of these same people wore clothing that showed more than I ever did.

I never wanted to feed my babies in a public restroom. How would you like to have spaghetti in a bathroom?

I do think the Time cover was provocative and meant to create controversy. That's a sad shame really because it puts a lot of mothers in a bad light because they choose to nurse a child beyond a year and it casts a cloud over the content of the article about attentive mothering.

Scuba
05-11-2012, 12:05 AM
Color my clueless I guess but mothers have been nursing their children since the beginning of time. It's how baby's get fed. Whoa and get this the wee one gets all of the appropriate nutrients and antibodies necessary for sustaining it's life. And God forbid we should demonstrate effective methods for parental bonding in public. Do we gasp and close our eyes in horror and shame when we see a kitten nursing? Someone want to tell mamma Polar Bear she really should find a more appropriate place to nurse her young? Sound ridiculous? It should...

Funny how SOCIETY sexualizes/objectifies and shames women all in the same sentence.

I am SO over the patriarch and it's ignorant agenda that I just cringe anymore when articles like this are published. It's high time some people just get over themselves and grow up.

**steps off soapbox**

Thank you for the 5 minutes...

Scoobs :)

SugarFemme
05-11-2012, 01:18 AM
Kudos to you for this post. I agree with you that the sexualization of feeding your child is inappropriate. And that Time Magazine would stoop so low is sensationalist reporting nonsense. What they call "Extreme Parenting", is being done in MANY cultures all over the world currently. And because it is not a part of Western Culture it is wrong according to the naysayers. What an arrogant, closed minded, and provincial attitude towards parenting and women. Not only is it sexist, but it is classist as well.





Color my clueless I guess but mothers have been nursing their children since the beginning of time. It's how baby's get fed. Whoa and get this the wee one gets all of the appropriate nutrients and antibodies necessary for sustaining it's life. And God forbid we should demonstrate effective methods for parental bonding in public. Do we gasp and close our eyes in horror and shame when we see a kitten nursing? Someone want to tell mamma Polar Bear she really should find a more appropriate place to nurse her young? Sound ridiculous? It should...

Funny how SOCIETY sexualizes/objectifies and shames women all in the same sentence.

I am SO over the patriarch and it's ignorant agenda that I just cringe anymore when articles like this are published. It's high time some people just get over themselves and grow up.

**steps off soapbox**

Thank you for the 5 minutes...

Scoobs :)

Breathless
05-11-2012, 02:29 AM
I breast fed both my children, because I was lucky enough to physically be able to. I covered up, a little, as I was uncomfortable being stared at, but I was not about to allow my child to sweat like crazy while trying to nurse. I absolutely support and encourage breast feeding for the nutritional value, and bonding opportunity that it provides. I totally disagree when it is done for shock value and attention.

Beloved
05-11-2012, 04:54 AM
http://www.flickr.com/photos/21013206@N04/7175802318/

girl_dee
05-11-2012, 05:22 AM
one thing about the photo, it got our attention

always2late
05-11-2012, 06:16 AM
ex·ploi·ta·tion (ksploi-tshn) n.
1. The act of employing to the greatest possible advantage
2. Utilization of another person or group for selfish purposes
3. An advertising or a publicity program.

Does the mother in the cover photo actually nurse her child in the manner depicted in the photo? Or was it staged to provoke a reaction? I have no idea. However, if it WAS staged, then it is an example of exploitation. Do I have a problem with a woman nursing in any way or manner she sees fit? No. Do I have a problem with a woman nursing her child beyond the "accepted" age as prescribed by society? No. Would I have a problem with a magazine depicting a cover photo of a woman publically nursing her child in whatever manner SHE chooses? No. Do I have a problem with a magazine staging a photograph of a woman nursing in order to provoke a reaction or sell their issue? Yes.

Kobi
05-11-2012, 06:57 AM
The cover got our attention.

The story, however, is about Motherhood not breastfeeding. I want to read it cuz it is supposedly about mothers who go to the "extreme". I want to know what is is considered "extreme" and who is doing the determination.

In the current War on Women, this kind of stuff makes me real edgy.

girl_dee
05-11-2012, 07:33 AM
ex·ploi·ta·tion (ksploi-tshn) n.
1. The act of employing to the greatest possible advantage
2. Utilization of another person or group for selfish purposes
3. An advertising or a publicity program.

Does the mother in the cover photo actually nurse her child in the manner depicted in the photo? Or was it staged to provoke a reaction? I have no idea. However, if it WAS staged, then it is an example of exploitation. Do I have a problem with a woman nursing in any way or manner she sees fit? No. Do I have a problem with a woman nursing her child beyond the "accepted" age as prescribed by society? No. Would I have a problem with a magazine depicting a cover photo of a woman publically nursing her child in whatever manner SHE chooses? No. Do I have a problem with a magazine staging a photograph of a woman nursing in order to provoke a reaction or sell their issue? Yes.

Regarding your last statement (((( FC ))))) i would venture to say the magazine would deny using it to sell issues but rather to bring attention to the subject at hand, motherhood. We all know anything regarding a breast will sell anything.


THIS is what kills me;

(Rant)

Way back when women stayed home, cooked cleaned and had the house to manage ( i am not talking about abusive, repressed women, but about women who felt happy and content doing so, not those who wanted to work outside the home and were not allowed to) hubby/kids/dog to feed, get kids to appointments/lessons, after school snacks, PTA, volunteer at school, homework etc.. all this was fulfilling to her, this was her part, this was her pride, this was what she did. THEN they said no, to be a *real woman* you have to go get a job, only they didn't tell her she STILL had to do the house, manage the kids, feed the masses, be a soccer mom/ideal wife ALL after working 8 hours a day. So the kids went off to day care, mamere's, crazy aunt loo-loos while mom went off to work. Baby is 6 weeks old? That's old enough for day care! The kid is 12, and a latch key kid now, all so mom can be a (what society deemed) *real woman*. Now this can work out of course, but the notion that we have to do it ALL to be a *real woman* KILLS me. SOOOOOOO then they say nope too many kids in day care, too many kids home alone after school, too many husbands complaining that they have to share housework now, too many kids home playing on the internet while mom is at work, kids eating breakfast and lunch at school, fast food for dinner, SO now, mom you need to stay home and nurture and coddle your babies, how can you even THINK of bringing a 6 week old to a day care center? So if you don't go to work and stay home with your babies you are a now *real woman*.

HOW about society keep their mouths shut and let women/parents decide WHO WHEN HOW WHAT WHERE they want to bring up their younguns... and stop putting demands on us in order that we may be *real women*?

(/rant)

Kobi
05-11-2012, 08:00 AM
Regarding your last statement (((( FC ))))) i would venture to say the magazine would deny using it to sell issues but rather to bring attention to the subject at hand, motherhood. We all know anything regarding a breast will sell anything.


THIS is what kills me;

(Rant)

Way back when women stayed home, cooked cleaned and had the house to manage ( i am not talking about abusive, repressed women, but about women who felt happy and content doing so, not those who wanted to work outside the home and were not allowed to) hubby/kids/dog to feed, get kids to appointments/lessons, after school snacks, PTA, volunteer at school, homework etc.. all this was fulfilling to her, this was her part, this was her pride, this was what she did. THEN they said no, to be a *real woman* you have to go get a job, only they didn't tell her she STILL had to do the house, manage the kids, feed the masses, be a soccer mom/ideal wife ALL after working 8 hours a day. So the kids went off to day care, mamere's, crazy aunt loo-loos while mom went off to work. Baby is 6 weeks old? That's old enough for day care! The kid is 12, and a latch key kid now, all so mom can be a (what society deemed) *real woman*. Now this can work out of course, but the notion that we have to do it ALL to be a *real woman* KILLS me. SOOOOOOO then they say nope too many kids in day care, too many kids home alone after school, too many husbands complaining that they have to share housework now, too many kids home playing on the internet while mom is at work, kids eating breakfast and lunch at school, fast food for dinner, SO now, mom you need to stay home and nurture and coddle your babies, how can you even THINK of bringing a 6 week old to a day care center? So if you don't go to work and stay home with your babies you are a now *real woman*.

HOW about society keep their mouths shut and let women/parents decide WHO WHEN HOW WHAT WHERE they want to bring up their younguns... and stop putting demands on us in order that we may be *real women*?

(/rant)


Um, at the risk of elevating your blood pressure even further.....dont forget mothers are now being blamed for the obesity rates. ;)

Apocalipstic
05-11-2012, 08:02 AM
I bet a lot of people are buying Time Magazine and talking about Time Magazine about the controversioal cover. There is no bad publicity.

About mothering and breast feeding? Its nobody's damn business. People need to stop being offended over every damn thing.

girl_dee
05-11-2012, 08:08 AM
Um, at the risk of elevating your blood pressure even further.....dont forget mothers are now being blamed for the obesity rates. ;)


yaknow what they say...

If it's not one thing it's your mother

dark_crystal
05-11-2012, 08:40 AM
I think breastfeeding is appropirate anytime and anywhere and i think employers should do everything possible to accommodate breastfeeding mothers

However, i am a little disturbed over the debate because there is starting to be some shaming behavior directed at mothers who are not able to breastfeed.

A climate is emerging where formula in a bottle seems to be looked at as the equivalent of antifreeze

There are very valid reasons why some mothers feed formula

girl_dee
05-11-2012, 09:16 AM
i once saw a show where a woman was still breastfeeding her 5 year old. The child was assessed as having delayed behaviors because she had no independence developed.

dark_crystal
05-11-2012, 09:29 AM
Breastfeeding is natural. All mammals breast feed their young...until they're old enough for solid foods.

When I had my son, one of the things they told me was that not only was it good for the baby, especially early on, but that it also was helpful because it made your uterus contract in order to expel all the afterbirth.

I don't agree that it's emotionally healthy to continue feeding your child after they reach an age where they have teeth and can eat solid foods. I don't believe we were built for that. When people used to have more children, they did not keep breast feeding all of them, they were weaned when the next one came along. This feels privileged, and something that has been created for parents with too much time (and money) to navel gaze.

YES. Privileged. That is what I was trying to say! Thank you!

Rockinonahigh
05-11-2012, 10:07 AM
Regarding your last statement (((( FC ))))) i would venture to say the magazine would deny using it to sell issues but rather to bring attention to the subject at hand, motherhood. We all know anything regarding a breast will sell anything.


THIS is what kills me;

(Rant)

Way back when women stayed home, cooked cleaned and had the house to manage ( i am not talking about abusive, repressed women, but about women who felt happy and content doing so, not those who wanted to work outside the home and were not allowed to) hubby/kids/dog to feed, get kids to appointments/lessons, after school snacks, PTA, volunteer at school, homework etc.. all this was fulfilling to her, this was her part, this was her pride, this was what she did. THEN they said no, to be a *real woman* you have to go get a job, only they didn't tell her she STILL had to do the house, manage the kids, feed the masses, be a soccer mom/ideal wife ALL after working 8 hours a day. So the kids went off to day care, mamere's, crazy aunt loo-loos while mom went off to work. Baby is 6 weeks old? That's old enough for day care! The kid is 12, and a latch key kid now, all so mom can be a (what society deemed) *real woman*. Now this can work out of course, but the notion that we have to do it ALL to be a *real woman* KILLS me. SOOOOOOO then they say nope too many kids in day care, too many kids home alone after school, too many husbands complaining that they have to share housework now, too many kids home playing on the internet while mom is at work, kids eating breakfast and lunch at school, fast food for dinner, SO now, mom you need to stay home and nurture and coddle your babies, how can you even THINK of bringing a 6 week old to a day care center? So if you don't go to work and stay home with your babies you are a now *real woman*.

HOW about society keep their mouths shut and let women/parents decide WHO WHEN HOW WHAT WHERE they want to bring up their younguns... and stop putting demands on us in order that we may be *real women*?

(/rant)

I couldnt agree more about all you have said.

Sachita
05-11-2012, 10:50 AM
As Dee pointed out the pic gets your attention. beyond the content of the article I'm sure it was meant to strike a chord and sell issues. Kudos to Time for taking risk even if it is the most natural thing in the world.

I breast fed my son the first 6 months. I may have gone to a year or teeth but it just wasn't an option. I had to resume work after 8 weeks and back then the pumps were not nearly as fancy as they are today. I use some daycare but could depend on my family too. I hated using daycare and I think its sucks that a woman can't have that choice if she wants it. I think its France where the government supplements a mother for up to a year for maternity leave. But our system is so screwed up, we are raped in health care and a tax system that supports corruption rather then support american families.

Abigail Crabby
05-11-2012, 11:11 AM
I see nothing wrong with breastfeeding in public, attachment parenting and more.

We are more than sexual beings, we are Mothers who (ok some don't always) love their children and do what is best for them.

Screw Time for trying to exploit something natural and beautiful if that's what they are doing I've not read the story and guess I will have to go buy the issue to find out...

The_Lady_Snow
05-11-2012, 11:27 AM
I watched an interview with Mom, child, Time Magazine person and the doctor who advocates this type of patenting. Mom looked and seemed pretty ok with her and her family's choice to breastfeeding till the age the child is at. She was weaning him now, she also stated that this was not for everyone and both her and the doctor said it was a choice some mothers could make and if you can't you can apply some of the parenting not all.

I personally feel the picture taken was marketing and the controversy ran amok.

What I will NEVER understand is why people have to sexualize, pervert, be so crude regarding a mother and her child and their choice.

The comments that have been made were so disgusting and ugly.

If you have MSNBC on your phone you can watch the interview on there.

Novelafemme
05-11-2012, 12:10 PM
Oh Holy Hell, how did I miss this one!!

With my first daughter I breastfed until she weaned herself at 7 months. Awesome! She also preferred to sleep in her crib and didn't like to be held a lot. She is still somewhat touch sensitive unless I tackle her. ;)

With Sophia all rules flew out the window. She wanted to be strapped to my body 24/7...seriously! She nursed until she was 3&1/2 and would have joyously continued had I not weaned her. The kid LOVED nursing!! And honestly, I really didn't give it a second thought because it was something she loved and it was such a wonderful bonding experience for us both. We would rock and hum songs and she would twist my earlobe around in her fingers. I would practice extended breastfeeding again in a heartbeat were I to have another baby and that was our chosen path.

I also nursed my daughters anywhere and everywhere. I wasn't some militant mom who was out to defy social norms, but I did see value in my baby eating when and where she wanted to and me not having to cover her up in the Tucson heat with something so other humans don't have to experience the vile shame that is my breast. GASP!

Have I been shamed for all of this? You betcha! Not so much by family, even though by the time Sophia was 3 they were all "uh...you're STILL nursing her??" but many times strangers would express their displeasure...to which I would always smile and ask if they would like to eat their lunch/breakfast/dinner in the bathroom. I also had a partner who thought it was disgusting and asked me to not ever talk about that part of my parenting philosophy.

Ultimately, you just have to do what feels right and FUCK everyone else's opinions. Our breasts are not just fun-bags. Feeding babies is what they are there for, dammit!

I also co-slept with Sophia because I worked crazy long hours and she missed me. Today she is unbelievably smart, totally independent and very healthy...as is my oldest!

Shamers be gone. Mom's, do what speaks to your heart and stand firm to your convictions! I haven't read the article and probably won't because I've lived through it in real time. ;)

Gotta go graduate now. XOXO, Novela

Cin
05-11-2012, 12:26 PM
As Dee pointed out the pic gets your attention. beyond the content of the article I'm sure it was meant to strike a chord and sell issues. Kudos to Time for taking risk even if it is the most natural thing in the world.

I breast fed my son the first 6 months. I may have gone to a year or teeth but it just wasn't an option. I had to resume work after 8 weeks and back then the pumps were not nearly as fancy as they are today. I use some daycare but could depend on my family too. I hated using daycare and I think its sucks that a woman can't have that choice if she wants it. I think its France where the government supplements a mother for up to a year for maternity leave. But our system is so screwed up, we are raped in health care and a tax system that supports corruption rather then support american families.
In Quebec mother, father and/or adopting parent can without fear of losing their job have a year unpaid leave and receive from the provincial government 55% of their pay weekly. Mother gets an additional 18 weeks before the birth, the father 5 weeks. Adoptive parents can have a total of 70 weeks. If you are pregnant and can’t work because your job is deemed dangerous to your pregnancy for any reason you can leave as soon as you are pregnant and receive CSST (workman’s comp –90% of your salary) for the duration as well as 52 weeks after the birth of the child. Gotta love the French mind set.

EnderD_503
05-11-2012, 12:57 PM
Funny how SOCIETY sexualizes/objectifies and shames women all in the same sentence.

I am SO over the patriarch and it's ignorant agenda that I just cringe anymore when articles like this are published. It's high time some people just get over themselves and grow up.

What I will NEVER understand is why people have to sexualize, pervert, be so crude regarding a mother and her child and their choice.


I haven't read the article (I don't read Time magazine, but I'll see if it's on their website), but I agree very much with these two statements. When it comes to breastfeeding North American society seems to have this uncanny desire to try to sexually objectify and shame women, and portray breastfeeding as some kind of kinky activity between mother and child with an invisible hetero cismale spectator.

At the same time, the cover makes me wonder about the intentions behind designing the cover. I don't know, but something about the way the bodies are posed seems like the cover is purposefully trying to sexually objectify/shame/pervert breastfeeding. Maybe if I read the article more would be clarified, but it makes me wonder if that is typically how the mother in the article breastfeeds her child, if this is a natural pose, or if it was staged that way for a purpose. And if their bodies were posed/staged, then that does disturb me. Not because of the act of breastfeeding itself, but because it then becomes another example of sexualising women's bodies in the media for the purpose of attracting the hetero cismale gaze. So instead of talking women's relationships with their children and the social stigmas against breastfeeding, we're back to a conversation with the hetero male spectre in the background...

Apocalipstic
05-11-2012, 01:18 PM
Selling magazines...plain and simple.

Glenn
05-11-2012, 01:18 PM
As a regular member of a few hetero-male sites, where feminism is usually frowned upon, and because the child is a boy, I think many hetero-men may view this cover picture as symbolic of the sissification of American men by modern women(for which there seems to be a growing belief and angst).

The_Lady_Snow
05-11-2012, 03:06 PM
As a regular member of a few hetero-male sites, where feminism is usually frowned upon, and because the child is a boy, I think many hetero-men may view this cover picture as symbolic of the sissification of American men by modern women(for which there seems to be a growing belief and angst).

DING DING DING..

The photograph itsel brings out some pretty fucked up thinking.

It's what's happening to women and breastfeeding there's some weird reactions to where mothers making a choice are being singled out for feeding their child.


It's a choice that these women make it shouldn't be degraded, it should be celebrated because they say fuck you and your assumptions I'm nurturing my child the way and she/he pleases.

My cubs are all grown and still curl up next to me like when they were babies. Parenting is something that comes with no garuantees of success, no instructions, no manuals, we just do it and hope we don't ingrain the shit our parents did.

We hope they are evolved and hope through them change comes, breastfeeding or not...

Quintease
05-11-2012, 03:39 PM
I wouldn't do it but I don't have a problem with it.

Society has got to get over their revulsion of women's bodies.

Kobi
05-11-2012, 04:34 PM
At the same time, the cover makes me wonder about the intentions behind designing the cover. I don't know, but something about the way the bodies are posed seems like the cover is purposefully trying to sexually objectify/shame/pervert breastfeeding. Maybe if I read the article more would be clarified, but it makes me wonder if that is typically how the mother in the article breastfeeds her child, if this is a natural pose, or if it was staged that way for a purpose. And if their bodies were posed/staged, then that does disturb me. Not because of the act of breastfeeding itself, but because it then becomes another example of sexualising women's bodies in the media for the purpose of attracting the hetero cismale gaze. So instead of talking women's relationships with their children and the social stigmas against breastfeeding, we're back to a conversation with the hetero male spectre in the background...


The cover was staged for effect. The photographer, Martin Schoeller, explains his vision as:

When you think of breast-feeding, you think of mothers holding their children, which was impossible with some of these older kids,” Schoeller says. “I liked the idea of having the kids standing up to underline the point that this was an uncommon situation.”

Capturing various attached parents — and their reasons for attachment parenting — was Schoeller’s biggest goal for the sitting. “It was important to show that there’s no stereotypical look for a mom who practices this kind of parenting,” Schoeller says.

http://lightbox.time.com/2012/05/10/parenting/#1



As a regular member of a few hetero-male sites, where feminism is usually frowned upon, and because the child is a boy, I think many hetero-men may view this cover picture as symbolic of the sissification of American men by modern women(for which there seems to be a growing belief and angst).



Cant say that I follow this line of reasoning r.e. the "sissification of American men" in regards to the photo. I'm thinking men who have a "sissified" problem are more likely to be those who were taught to believe women are meant to be barefoot, pregnant, silent, pieces of property and indentured servants who are supposed to worship the ground they walk on. Thats a patriarchy and privilege issue for another thread. ;)

I went looking for the magazine which was supposed to hit the newsstands today. It isnt here yet.

Cin
05-11-2012, 04:44 PM
As a regular member of a few hetero-male sites, where feminism is usually frowned upon, and because the child is a boy, I think many hetero-men may view this cover picture as symbolic of the sissification of American men by modern women(for which there seems to be a growing belief and angst).


Cant say that I follow this line of reasoning r.e. the "sissification of American men" in regards to the photo. I'm thinking men who have a "sissified" problem are more likely to be those who were taught to believe women are meant to be barefoot, pregnant, silent, pieces of property and indentured servants who are supposed to worship the ground they walk on.


I would say not following this line of reasoning is probably a good thing. However, it doesn't make it any less a reality and a problematic one at that. The men you are talking about who think women should be barefoot, pregnant and silent also don't go for women making sissies out of boys and have considerable angst over the detrimental effect modern women are having on men. Thus this current attack on women's rights.

aishah
05-11-2012, 04:56 PM
women tamed dot com (don't really care to give them hits from here) is one of a BUNCH of anti-feminist websites discussing how women are trying to make sissies out of boys, if anyone's not familiar with that rhetoric. it's a very common thread in conservative thought nowadays.

along with the sexualization of women's bodies, there's this whole undercurrent of oedipus complex/sexualization of the mother/son relationship that kind of drifts underneath breastfeeding discussion (particularly past the age of 1) a lot of the time, and i think it ties into the blaming of women for "sissifying" men. it's disgusting that that is what shapes popular opinion about breastfeeding, but it does. that's the first thing i thought of when i saw the cover of time.

i agree with others who've said it's staged and used to create shock value. i don't read time, partly because of stunts like this. i don't think there's anything wrong with breastfeeding or not breastfeeding, and i think women should be able to feed their kids anywhere they want.

princessbelle
05-11-2012, 06:48 PM
snip~

i agree with others who've said it's staged and used to create shock value. i don't read time, partly because of stunts like this. i don't think there's anything wrong with breastfeeding or not breastfeeding, and i think women should be able to feed their kids anywhere they want.

Already posted here but wanted to high five this.

I'm sick to death of some people saying we don't mother correctly or we don't breastfeed long enough or we breastfeed too long. Measure, measure, measure, constantly.

Seriously? Know what? Pretty darn sure we WOMEN can figure it out and have over a billion years ago. QUIT measuring us!!!

Leave us alone, Time, and quit trying to make us look bad, no matter which side we are on. We do the best we can with the resources and time that we have with our kids.

Geeze.

BrutalDaddy
05-11-2012, 07:08 PM
Got no issues at all with a mother breastfeeding her kid. Not my place at ALL to decide when it should stop, etc. I do have questions on when I wonder where you have to draw the line due to having been exposed to a five year old eating a waffle then looking at the mom and saying, "I'm thirsty!" So mom lifts off half the top and kid grabs a tit and begins sucking away. Customers were very uncomfortable and I could totally understand why. Pump it out and put it in a bottle? Is it really different then just spending time with the child, reading, cuddling, listening to music, etc.? Yet it isn't my decision to make and I get that.

With that said I do have a major problem with the cover in regards to how things can be "percieved". Normally I don't give a shit. I go against society's standards of "norm" with how I look and the fact I'm in the wrong body, etc. Yet each single time I look at this cover I can't help but think of how this is simply "legal" child porn for some pedophile to jack off to.

Seriously. There are so many ways to get a point across then this, in my opinion. Nothing more then a way to garner attention (for the magazine) and give pedophiles a chance to get off with a magazine that won't get them thrown in jail just because the picture is being touted as an "educational" tool.


Just a Tool,
Brute.

girl_dee
05-11-2012, 07:33 PM
Already posted here but wanted to high five this.

I'm sick to death of some people saying we don't mother correctly or we don't breastfeed long enough or we breastfeed too long. Measure, measure, measure, constantly.

Seriously? Know what? Pretty darn sure we WOMEN can figure it out and have over a billion years ago. QUIT measuring us!!!

Leave us alone, Time, and quit trying to make us look bad, no matter which side we are on. We do the best we can with the resources and time that we have with our kids.

Geeze.








You said just what i was trying to convey (only in pretty puffy pink font) that when we were stay at home moms we were unfit, when we went to work we were unfit, now we are back at home nursing our babies and we are yet wrong again.

Blah!

BrutalDaddy
05-11-2012, 07:57 PM
You said just what i was trying to convey (only in pretty puffy pink font) that when we were stay at home moms we were unfit, when we went to work we were unfit, now we are back at home nursing our babies and we are yet wrong again.

Blah!


I do find it almost amusing that there seems to be no satsifying the whole "what makes a perfect mother" scenerio. My mom did the very best she could with what she had and considering the sperm donor was a dick, she did pretty damn good in my mind.

Damned if you do. Damned if you don't. Screw what society feels if you're doing the best you can for your own. That's my view.

Brute.

SugarFemme
05-11-2012, 08:04 PM
When my daughter was a baby, my Mom was always giving advice. shes on the breast too long. Shes on the bottle too long. She should be potty trained. She should be done with binky....all these "shoulds". I parented by instinct and my childs needs. But, the best advice I ever got was from cousin....."as long as your kid isn't drinking out of a bottle, sucking on a binky , or wearing diapers when they are 21, quit worrying about the shoulds as it all evens out". Of course it was said with tongue in cheek, but he was right.





Already posted here but wanted to high five this.

I'm sick to death of some people saying we don't mother correctly or we don't breastfeed long enough or we breastfeed too long. Measure, measure, measure, constantly.

Seriously? Know what? Pretty darn sure we WOMEN can figure it out and have over a billion years ago. QUIT measuring us!!!

Leave us alone, Time, and quit trying to make us look bad, no matter which side we are on. We do the best we can with the resources and time that we have with our kids.

Geeze.

girl_dee
05-11-2012, 08:19 PM
I do find it almost amusing that there seems to be no satsifying the whole "what makes a perfect mother" scenerio. My mom did the very best she could with what she had and considering the sperm donor was a dick, she did pretty damn good in my mind.

Damned if you do. Damned if you don't. Screw what society feels if you're doing the best you can for your own. That's my view.

Brute.

Exactly.....how often have you seen or heard the term deadbeat mom? Not very.

~ocean
05-11-2012, 08:27 PM
^ 5 cajun :))))) ** kicks the June Cleaver act off the stage ** lol

princessbelle
05-11-2012, 08:40 PM
Exactly Dee!!!!!

And the more i think about this the madder i get. They print this right before Mother's Day with the headline "Are you Mom enough"

You know, here is a good opportunity to share a story regarding what Mother's Day is all about....praising our moms. But, instead they take the route of trying to shame us, divide us, make us feel less than no matter what we think of the picture.

Wouldn't it have been lovely to show the beauty of mothers and how many, if not most try and try and try to do good by our kids. Our decisions to work or not work, breastfeed or not, the struggles, the decisions, the kisses, the hugs, the love, the goodnight stories, the open arms...

Mothers are to be honored this week. None of us were perfect, IMO. But, damn it we freaking tried. It would have been nice, oh powerful Time, to have read stories about moms that actually pulled us all together and made us proud of our diversity, perseverance and love for our kids.

Just really pisses me off.

Off soap box.

goodlilfemme
05-11-2012, 09:09 PM
im whole heartedly for a woman breastfeeding her child in public private hell do it in the line in the grocery store if your child needs it but the cover of a magazine come on people there's better things to put on the cover . breastfeeding is natural and there's nothing wrong with it till someone puts a picture like that one on the cover ofa magazine.
I breastfed my son, in public when necessary...and I totally support every woman's right to feed their child whenever and wherever they have to. After all...that is what breasts are FOR...so this stupidity about it somehow being distasteful or "obscene" for a woman to be engaging in a completely natural act is absolutely ridiculous!! That being said...I am disturbed by the cover photo. It seems it was staged to provoke a reaction and has little to do with the subject of the actual article.

4verNlove
05-11-2012, 09:47 PM
I breastfed my son solely for five months, no water, no formula...just breast milk...so, as one can imagine...I fed him in all kinds of places....a ladies room in a department store, my truck....but I have to say..I neve encountered anyone discriminating...hmmm. now this was 30 years ago...lol...perhaps, it was a time when breastfeeding was becoming popular again...don't know, but I found strangers to be supportive..I did try to be discreet...(cover us with a light blanket....It was a wonderful experience...extremely tiring, but wonderful...he fed every 3 hours all that time...(he's graduating Med. school next week) <smile>...and regarding the photo in the magazine?....what bothered me the most was the rise they tried to get out of publishing it....and they did...pros and cons....Me? It's all individual...If that's what one wants and needs...it doesn't affect me...I did what I could...and am grateful....Love you Bobby!!!! Congrats...!!!!

julieisafemme
05-11-2012, 09:56 PM
I did not read the whole thread yet. I just had to chime in. I breastfed my daughter until she was 3 1/2. I initiated the weaning. She was not pleased. She still remembers it! I did not shroud my child in a shawl. My child did know that it was my body and she did not lift my shirt whenever she wanted. I see that as teaching a child boundaries. We all have our physical space.

I don't like that picture. It does not represent my experience of breastfeeding. As far as the acceptable age for nursing? Pfft! I support any Mother to make that decision for herself. I practiced attachment parenting in the way that felt right to me. Children are individual. I don't fault any woman's decision on how to raise their child.

Beloved
05-12-2012, 04:38 AM
I agree the photo was meant to be provoking. There is something about her stance, the look in her eyes, etc. People are talking about the issue which is not a bad thing. The title makes me think the article has something to do with the "mommy wars."

I never nursed in public to get a reaction. I was just doing what needed to be done and at the level I felt was acceptable. It wasn't meant to be a statement or to shock. I do hope that maybe by other mothers saw me maybe it would encourage them to do the same. It's kinda like coming out of the closet, the more people that do it, the easier it is to do yourself.

I have nursed everywhere. Would you rather my child scream bloody murder in a restaurant or nurse quietly? I think most people would choose the latter.

A woman I used to go to a playgroup with was nursing her month old baby in the food court of a mall with a big nursing cover. Someone at the table next her asked her is she could do that someplace else! Unbelievable! He couldn't even see anything. She said no and stayed but said after she left she cried.

It's not up to mom's to make other people comfortable with breastfeeding. It is not perverse, obscene, or sexual. Get over it.

Medusa
05-12-2012, 05:53 AM
I think there is a reason they used a standing male child in the photo.

How do you think the general public would have reacted if the child had been a girl?

girl_dee
05-12-2012, 05:56 AM
I think there is a reason they used a standing male child in the photo.

How do you think the general public would have reacted if the child had been a girl?

Excellent point, not to mention the mom is easy on the eyes.

i feel that the men in the world thing our tits belong to them and that nursing babies ruin their fun/fantasy.

The_Lady_Snow
05-12-2012, 06:33 AM
I think there is a reason they used a standing male child in the photo.

How do you think the general public would have reacted if the child had been a girl?



I think it would of had the same kind of comments and they would of been just as ugly. Her son being in the pic (she has 2) I feel scares the binary thinkers and leads them down the road of perverse crude thoughts and comments.

We seem to hypersexualize children a lot for some odd reason.

The_Lady_Snow
05-12-2012, 06:38 AM
Excellent point, not to mention the mom is easy on the eyes.

i feel that the men in the world thing our tits belong to them and that nursing babies ruin their fun/fantasy.





Exactly, womens bodies are not their own, patriarchal shenanigans and impositions would have you believe that a womans body is for men's enjoyment and we have holes to fill and a set of titties for them to do so as they please.

Quintease
05-13-2012, 11:48 AM
I think there is a reason they used a standing male child in the photo.

Um yes, she had a male child. It happens.

aishah
05-13-2012, 11:55 AM
http://healthland.time.com/2012/05/10/q-a-with-jamie-lynne-grumet/
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/shannon-colleary/time-breastfeeding_b_1510510.html

two really good articles about the model and her kids.

girl_dee
05-13-2012, 12:10 PM
The mom model was breastfed until she was 6. She had this to say about remembering it.


What’s that memory like?
It’s really warm. It’s like embracing your mother, like a hug. You feel comforted, nurtured and really, really loved. I had so much self-confidence as a child, and I know it’s from that. I never felt like she would ever leave me. I felt that security.



Her son in the photo is almost 4, she also has an adopted 5 year old. Interesting woman.

girl_dee
05-13-2012, 12:15 PM
i also love this

"But people have to realize this is biologically normal. It’s not socially normal."


thanks for the links aishah

JAGG
05-13-2012, 12:17 PM
No one can dispute the fact that a mothers milk is what is best for the BABY. Any BABY! Any baby animal until they are old enough to hunt for themselves or eat solid food. And when a baby is hungry it should be fed. No one should take issue with that. That's what breasts are for, but breast feeding a 6 yr old? I find this very disturbing, alarming and beyond strange.Once a child has teeth, they no longer need substance from breast milk, they can get it from food. I haven't read the article , nor do I care to. If it's ok to breast feed a 6 yr old , why stop there ,why not a 16yr old ? Or a 26 yr old? There are plenty of ways to nurture and bond with your kids ,that doesn't involve breast feeding a child who no longer needs it for substance. I find it disturbing, on many levels.

aishah
05-13-2012, 12:19 PM
No one can dispute the fact that a mothers milk is what is best for the BABY. Any BABY! Any baby animal until they are old enough to hunt for themselves or eat solid food. And when a baby is hungry it should be fed. No one should take issue with that. That's what breasts are for, but breast feeding a 6 yr old? I find this very disturbing, alarming and beyond strange.Once a child has teeth, they no longer need substance from breast milk, they can get it from food. I haven't read the article , nor do I care to. If it's ok to breast feed a 6 yr old , why stop there ,why not a 16yr old ? Or a 26 yr old? There are plenty of ways to nurture and bond with your kids ,that doesn't involve breast feeding a child who no longer needs it for substance. I find it disturbing, on many levels.

the model states in the article that she breastfed her older son (who is i think 5 or 6) because he was adopted and the process was really traumatizing for him. she only did it for a short amount of time to help him adjust and connect while he learned english and got settled in. makes sense to me.

girl_dee
05-13-2012, 12:20 PM
the model herself was breastfed by her mother until 6 and she weaned herself.

girl_dee
05-13-2012, 01:13 PM
2 things came to mind a while ago

1) Pacifiers, do people who have issues with "extended" breastfeeding (only called that in America) have a problem with a pacifier? Or is it just the child on the breast that seems bothersome when the child wants to suck ?

2) In this country we drink cows milk. The child stops drinking breastmilk and goes to cow's milk, sometimes at 6 months - a year. Again is it the child attached to the breast that is the issue? Seems like mothers milk would be the better choice, so is it the child's independence we are trying attain?

princessbelle
05-13-2012, 01:53 PM
I never breast fed and the reason i didn't is because i went back to work 6 weeks after giving birth, both times. I did not want to "pump" due to the inconvenience quite honestly and that was the only reason. My kids had formula and they were healthy and i don't really have an issue with either way. I think as long as the child is healthy and thriving, keep doing what you are doing.

Now a pacifier, that is another story...

My oldest never would take one, he actually gagged when i tried to give it to him. My youngest was over 3 before i got him off of that. He called it his "ossie-wass" no clue where that came from but it was comfort to him and he would panic when it wasn't around. So would i :|. Not positive that him getting braces was because of that or not, but that is something that i've heard. The suckling need in every baby is something that they have to have and is an ingrained way of staying alive.

As i've said before, whether you breast feed or not and whether you do so until whatever age YOU see fit as a mother and child dynamic, it's YOUR business. Given the context of feeding and nurturing, there is no wrong way in my book.

girl_dee
05-13-2012, 02:29 PM
Belle i was wondering if the breastmilk/formula would come up. It's not the issue at hand, attached parenting is but i do not like when formula moms are judged!

i believe in "nurturing", i believe a mom feeding her baby a bottle can be just as nurturing as a mom breastfeeding.

RockOn
05-13-2012, 03:49 PM
I do not have children but think breast feeding is a normal thing some moms choose to do.

feel free to correct me:
By age three, aren't children well into eating on their own? If this is true, I am not understanding the purpose of this photo.

My curiosity made me wonder. What if this child on the cover were female ... Would it bring out gay-haters in the U.S. to rant this could create lesbians? I do believe the child's gender in photo was selected with tremendous care.

The_Lady_Snow
05-13-2012, 03:50 PM
So after watching a few interviews, learning more about the intent I can now really voice what I strongly feel about this particular way of marketing, because it's what it is marketing.

The magazine stirred up tons of controversy the way the child is posed, it's put Moms against Moms regarding who's the better parent or not. The picture is misleading since I thought it would be about when or when not to breastfeed a child and how Mom's that choose to are literally being bullied in society and shamed for doing what feels right to them.

It's a OLD MAN telling women how to *parent*, how to be *better* Mom's. What the hell does this old guy know and most importantly WHY are we as women listening to this MAN telling us or giving us advice on how to better parent.

I'd rather seek advice from a Mom before some old guy who they could not put on the cover because let's be honest, Mom on the cover is the sexist ideal of a *hot mom*

Thin, blonde, pretty he's not gonna sell covers like she is, throw in a stool and an almost 4 year old child posed into the mix and you have controversy and this magazine sells a bit more, women are dogging out one another on Mother's Day.

It's disgusting sometimes how we allow *men* to display images of us (women) in ways that can be, are demeaning especially to something as important as.

Motherhood.

RockOn
05-13-2012, 03:55 PM
I came into work today. I used my cell phone to reply. Since I am at work, I was only able to read a couple of posts above mine.

I do want to come back when home and read all the other posts.

thanks ...

The_Lady_Snow
05-13-2012, 04:10 PM
I do not have children but think breast feeding is a normal thing some moms choose to do.

feel free to correct me:
By age three, aren't children well into eating on their own? If this is true, I am not understanding the purpose of this photo.

My curiosity made me wonder. What if this child on the cover were female ... Would it bring out gay-haters in the U.S. to rant this could create lesbians? I do believe the child's gender in photo was selected with tremendous care.




I think and feel people would be just as ugly, how anyone can sexualize a child is ridiculous to me since children up to the age of puberty are pretty genderless unless we as parents are enforcing the binary of what boys and girls are "supposed to do"


Anything we do as parents don't "make our kids gay/bi/trans they are either born this way and if they don't know right away they should be given the chance to express or experiment with their sexuality without shaming from a parent.

Anyways that's what I think I could be wrong.. She was selected because she is a parent with 2 sons who practices attachment parenting, it's savy the way the war on women continues in the tiniest of ways especially in the media....

RockOn
05-13-2012, 04:33 PM
Want to clarify ...

LadySnow, I agree that most certainly parents do not make their children gay/lesbian/bi/trans.

I was born gay.

always2late
05-13-2012, 05:13 PM
So after watching a few interviews, learning more about the intent I can now really voice what I strongly feel about this particular way of marketing, because it's what it is marketing.

The magazine stirred up tons of controversy the way the child is posed, it's put Moms against Moms regarding who's the better parent or not. The picture is misleading since I thought it would be about when or when not to breastfeed a child and how Mom's that choose to are literally being bullied in society and shamed for doing what feels right to them.

It's a OLD MAN telling women how to *parent*, how to be *better* Mom's. What the hell does this old guy know and most importantly WHY are we as women listening to this MAN telling us or giving us advice on how to better parent.

I'd rather seek advice from a Mom before some old guy who they could not put on the cover because let's be honest, Mom on the cover is the sexist ideal of a *hot mom*

Thin, blonde, pretty he's not gonna sell covers like she is, throw in a stool and an almost 4 year old child posed into the mix and you have controversy and this magazine sells a bit more, women are dogging out one another on Mother's Day.

It's disgusting sometimes how we allow *men* to display images of us (women) in ways that can be, are demeaning especially to something as important as.

Motherhood.

THANK YOU! This is kinda the point I was trying to make in one of my previous posts..but you said it WAY better than me! :)

I found the photo disturbing...and then I did some soul searching as to WHY I found it so disturbing. And the reason was that is was a staged photo designed to provoke controversy. Hell, I don't care how women breastfeed, or when, or how long...that is entirely up to each individual. And I could care less if they choose to do it while hanging upside down from a tree! However, I DO have a problem with someone posing a woman the way THEY want to and staging a photograph. And then to block in a title that somehow implies that a certain type of "mothering" is better than another. Yeah...I have a BIG problem with that.

The_Lady_Snow
05-13-2012, 05:25 PM
LINKYLOO (http://doublethink.us.com/paala/2012/05/11/today-show-interview-jamie-lynne-grumet-dr-sears/)

The_Lady_Snow
05-13-2012, 05:28 PM
What is ironic to me (not really) is that Dad gets no criticism at all, nor is he being shamed for making this decision as well..

Mysoginy and sexism are a curious thing.... The women and children are the ones always shit on...


http://i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2012/05/11/article-2142937-130A9668000005DC-685_634x424.jpg

tantalizingfemme
05-14-2012, 05:03 AM
I haven't read through the entire thread, so I am apologizing if this has already been covered.....

Is it really the the act of breast-feeding that is the nurturing part, or is it the act of holding the child close to you in a loving way for periods of time? I believe that it can be both, but one does not negate the other.

I breast-fed for about 2 months, but bottles were used at the same time when I was back at work. Does this mean that my relationship and closeness with my son is any different from others who breast-fed their children for longer than I did with no bottle? Nope.

I also don't appreciate that this idea promotes only the closeness of mothers to their children. What about fathers... what about adoptive parents... what about other family members who end up taking care of someone elses child?

I believe that we all do what we find best for our kids...but as others have stated, why do we have to start an us and them controvery again?

I abhor the fact that they chose to stage the cover with the child standing up, when the mother states that she breast feeds-him in a cradling, cuddling fashion.

It's a shame that TIME appears to have taken sides.

Beloved
05-17-2012, 05:13 AM
This article is for those who don't believe there is a benefit for breast feeding after babies get teeth. That is such a misconception.

http://www.usatoday.com/news/health/story/2012-05-11/breastfeeding-rates/54909940/1