My Best Friend [Archive] - Butch Femme Planet

Diva

01-30-2010, 10:49 AM

As trite as the thread title sounds, I don't mean for that in the creation of this thread.

But something struck me on someone's post on The Bucket List thread......before they died, they wanted a best friend. And I thought to myself how sad that was that she didn't have a best friend.

So, I thought it might be an interesting conversation to speak to the things which constitute what a 'best friend' is to you. What are the qualities important to you for 'best friend status'? You don't have to say who your best friend IS unless You just want to do so (I'm going to tell You!). And if Your partner is Your best friend, that's all well and good (and perfect, if You ask me), but that's not really what I'm after here.....(no offense intended)

That being said.............

My best friend is ShariBerry.
We met in 2003 when I had a party at my house. She and some others drove up from Austin. Now, at the time, we both were distracted and the friendship didn't 'launch' right away.

It wasn't until I moved to Austin that we reconnected and found that we had a lot of the same values, and we fed each other's spirits. It was so easy with her, I can't even remember WHEN it happened. And I could never understand why someone who is young enough to be my daughter (technically....I'm 18 years older than she is) would even WANT to be my best friend!

But she is an old soul.....and I am a young one....and they sorta met in the middle at 47 or so.... :cheesy:

I don't think there is a THING we don't talk about......and when my ass needs kicking, she kicks it....and vice versa. I know I can tell her ANYthing and it stops there. I trust her with my life. I know she has my best interests at heart.

We talk almost daily and we tell each other we love the other before the call is over.

There are 3 people on this planet that I would lay down my life for.........and Shari is one of them.

Blade

01-30-2010, 10:54 AM

I have had a few best friends in my life, you now at different ages and stages. I'll be back with more in a while. Great thread topic Diva.

Just_G

01-30-2010, 11:05 AM

Great thread Nizzle!

I have several different best friends, as I hang out with several different groups of people and there are different things that I am close to each one of them about.

First there is Cheech....he is the guy I can talk to about girls; we do a boy's night out a couple of times a month so we can talk about certain things that only WE get about each other. We are a lot alike in so many ways and have similar mindsets when it comes to a lot of things.

Second, there is Dawn....she is my best friend that I can talk to about anything and she does not judge me. She will tell me what she thinks, and it might not be what I want to hear, but she tells me anyway because our friendship allows that....needs that. She has been awesome about calming down when I get all worked up and start freaking out about going back to school. Her partner Jen is helping me with some grants and scholarship stuff. It is great when your best friend's partner is someone you get along with...sometimes that doesn't happen and it puts a strain on the relationship.

Third, there is my sister....while I don't talk to her about girls or let her know how stressed out I am about school (because I don't want her to worry about me), she is the one I talk to about family stuff, and we are karaoke buddies. She always looks out for me, and if anyone fucked with her, they would have to answer to ME! :baseball:

I have a lot of really close, tight knit friends....some knit wit friends :winky:....but I hold my friends very dear to my heart and would do anything I could for any of them within limits of the law and my means. I have a couple from this site...you know who you are....and at times I have referred to them as a best friend. I don't have just one....there are no rules that say you can't!

Andrew, Jr.

01-30-2010, 01:08 PM

I have some very close friends. The ones who stand by me no matter what. The kind that defend me, and tell it how it is. The ones who help me out when I need it, or tell me to get off my ass. At the end of every conversation we all tell each other that we love each other. It is our cardinal rule.

It is very sad that some folks have no idea of what it is to have a close friend of either femme or butch or ftm/mtf, etc.

Andrew

IrishGrrl

01-30-2010, 02:03 PM

The reason I dont have a bestfriend right now..is because so many times I"ve met femmes, and been on the recieving end of such catty behavior, I wash my hands of them. I'm distrustful of those who smile in your face, and talk behind your back. I'm distrustful of those who always have drama going on around them..always a bicker with others. Judgemental..passive agressive..fakes. Nope, I'd rather just have my periferal friends..thanks. Neither do I look for pity. I'm quite happy with the way things are. The wish for a best friend is the wish to find someone who is honest in thier dealings, can have a grown up conversation, and be real.

IttyBittyFem

01-30-2010, 03:25 PM

Funny how a year can change things . . . . .

My two sisters (one a year older than I - the other a year younger than I) have ALWAYS been my best friends. We could go to each other for anything.

As young children, we fought. Someone borrowed a dress without asking <screaming> Mom - tell her to give it back. Who borrowed those shoes <shouting> Mom - one of the girls took my shoes and now they're all scuffed up. Who looked at my Diary <yelling> Mom - someone was looking at my Diary, I can tell by the way it was put back.

Ah, those were the days!

Then one day - we realized we were adults . . . where did the time go? My sisters then became more than just sisters. We became each others confidant - supporters - best friends.

Once a month, a mandatory "Sisters Day". Didn't really matter what we did, dinner, shopping, sitting at each others kitchen tables with a cup of tea. For years, we kept this routine. Three way calls - another necessity. God forbid someone had news, we didn't share it unless all three of us were on the phone together.

Years passed - our devotion to one another never waivers. Then . . .

DEATH: We lost our beloved Father, the leader of the family, the one man that could do no wrong, our everything. It destroyed us all.

We all mourned differently - we have lost loved ones over the years, but never did we lose someone that hit us with this magnitude.

We all knew we needed space - just a little bit of time to all work through this on our own. Only a few months went by . . . . then . . . .

CANCER: First one sister - one month later, the other sister. A few months later, then Mom. Cancer sneaked in to them all.

We hadn't learned how to cope yet, a piece of our hearts had gone with Dad, we're still not complete, how do we now tackle this? We are still going through it with Mom. Death and Cancer has torn each one of us away from one another. More separation . . . .

My sisters needed a different type of support than I could offer. They leaned on spouses, other victims they met through treatment.

My life took a different turn, a horrible accident at work has temporarily disabled me. Healing I'm told, will take close to 2 years.

More change, I became single again. I needed my sisters. They were fighting Cancer. More separation . . .

Mom's Cancer has spread. The Mastectomy didn't catch it all. So now we're preparing. All in different ways again. More change. More separation . . .

Fear has now set in. Fear that we will drag each other down even further keeps us apart.

I miss my Sisters, they were my best friends, we could go to each other for anything.

I know we'll drift back. Once we all come back from this very dark and black place we know as grief, we'll come back to one another.

Until that day, I remain lost - solitary - alone.

One day, it will all come back, come back as it should be, come back as we've all learned our lesson on how to cope individually, we'll come back.

My message to all of you, tell your best friend how much you love them. Hold on to one another when difficult times arise, don't let go for a minute. As a best friend, you want to save them from the darkness. Allow them to come with you. Should you let go, you'll become sequestered. Hold on to one another and never let go.

shariberry

01-30-2010, 03:41 PM

I have 3 types of best friends.

I have a best friend from high school. Even though we don't talk often or see each other hardly EVER, when we do reconnect, it's like old times right away. I couldn't imagine my life without her.

I have Diva :) who is my all-of-the-time best friend. In 2003 I saw her slump from her chair so gracefully without spilling a drop of her wine, and I knew she was the one for me. We judge each other honestly, kindly and forgivingly, and our quirks balance each other out. When we get together, we are like a two-femme comedy team-she makes me laugh constantly. AND I know she will snatch those diamond earrings off in a second to defend me (be very frightened).

I also have Chad, who is my partner/best friend. He makes me feel safe and loved and we take care of each other. We share our hopes and dreams and fears.

Blade

01-30-2010, 03:52 PM

My best friend in school was a neighbor. I guess how it originated was we were the only girls in the neighborhood and she had 2 brothers so we either played with each other or with the boys. She out grew that, I didn't cuz I was one of the boys.

Well we didn't start out as friends, actually her brother came in my yard and said I had been talking about him and I said I didn't even know him or his name even. So he jumped me there in the driveway, my Dad sitting on the porch. So I kicked his ass, (his brother 5 yrs older than me pulled me off of him) he was like 18 and we were 13 and he went home and got her. I told her I didn't know her either, but if she wanted to take up for her brother, she wasn't the first but she could sure be next. I guess she didn't like the idea someone would stand up to her, so she started talking do you know so and so at school or have you had Ms so and so yet for Math.LOL

We hung out talked about everything in the world. Stayed in trouble together and basically wreaked havoc in the neighborhood. She was in chorus and I was in band. She was from a broken home and loved spending time with my family as it was in tact. She was boy crazy I was girl crazy and she knew it but never talked about it back then. I haven't talked to her in probably 20 yrs now but I bet if I found her phone number and when she answered the phone, I said HEY CHIK-FIL-A she'd know exactly who it was and we'd talk for days.

QueenofQueens

01-30-2010, 03:59 PM

To be clear, I am posting as a mod.

We have received reports from this thread and I have to say, it makes me sad to see social intrigues played out under guise of positivity. I recall these sorts of painful games from when I was a little girl. I never understood them then and I still don't. Maybe that's why those who I count as friends are few and far between and they are absolutely precious to me.

True friendship is a rare commodity. It is not necessarily synonymous with social success. In my opinion, neither true friendship nor social success should be lorded over anyone or trumpeted in a way that is hurtful. Who among us can't remember the terrible pain caused by the feeling of exclusion from a clique or social scene? Do we really need to re-enact that as adults who are members of an already marginalized group? Really?

This is a general reminder to all thread participants to keep all personal issues private. These forums are NOT a place to work out issues via passive aggressive posts. Please try to work out your issues privately, with adult conversations. If you are unable or unwilling, that is your choice, but veiled references to other community members, splashing drama and taking swipes in these forums is not an acceptable alternative.

WORK EET OUT! YOU CAN DO EET!

xox
QoQ

Sachita

01-30-2010, 04:11 PM

I read that too and my heart leaped. Thank you for starting this thread.

I have two best friends. They are my sisters. It's that simple. Its not because they are my sisters but truly my closest friends. I can tell my sisters anything and no matter what, any time, any hour if one of us says "we need you" everything is dropped, no questions asked and we go.

What I always hoped for and wanted was a partner & lover that was also my best friend. People talk about this and I think it would be so unbelievable to wake up each day and see the smile of a person that totally fulfills you in every way.

Diva

01-30-2010, 05:28 PM

When I was in elementary school, my best friend was Leslie .....we both loved music and would sing together all the time. We were in the same class in 2nd, 4th and 5th grades, went to the same church and she lived just down the street from me, so of course, we had sleep~overs all the time.

We went to different high schools and even though we still went to the same church, we sorta drifted apart. When my Dad passed away 3 years ago, she was at the funeral, and afterwards, we sat and talked as though no time had passed. I love when that happens!

I also had a dear friend in high school ~ Claire ~ I named my oldest child, Melody Claire, after her. She was a free spirit and the one who 'encouraged' me to pierce my own ears. With a corsage pin! (How my ears didn't fall off, I do NOT know!) We went to different colleges, but wrote often. She was my maid on honor when I got married, and when she got married, I was pregnant with Melody Claire and I sang for hers.

Then we got busy in our own lives and lost touch. But we found each other by accident, really, when I was living in Dallas. She lived in a Ft. Worth suburb. Of course, now I hate her because she looked about the same! ;) But again.....we didn't miss a beat. And over lunch, I came out to her and she didn't bat an eye. I will always love her for that.

Strappie

01-30-2010, 07:18 PM

I am fortunate to have a "few" best friends. I would be here all night telling you about each one. When I talk about them tears form in my eyes, my heart warms, and the words don't ever give them justest as to what they mean to me.

I know a best friend is someone you can tell your inner thoughts to and they won't judge you unless of course they are scolding you *smirk*

I love my besties with ALL my Heart and soul...

Corkey

01-30-2010, 07:32 PM

My best friend listens without judging
My best friend holds my truth
My best friend makes me laugh
My best friend keeps me honest
My best friend calls me on my shit
My best friend heals me
My best friend keeps my secrets
My best friend lets me act an ass when I feel like it
My best friend soothes my soul
My best friend kicks my ass when needed
My best friend loves me unconditionally
My best friend is my wife.
:givingarose:

Diva

01-31-2010, 07:37 AM

Blade

01-31-2010, 09:21 AM

My best friend got married and moved out west right after she graduated. Bring in best friend #2. This was in TN. We met in college at the pool tables. She was straight but very much a redneck woman! She used GD every sentence and I'd NEVER heard a woman talk like that before in my life. LOL course life had only been 18 yrs at that point. We hit it off right from the start. We camped, partied, rode the mountains, went to Parksville and Knoxville and Chattanooga partying at every bar we stopped at. We chose our classes to be Tue/Thur classes so we'd have 4 days a week to party. We spent almost every night together somewhere either her parents house or my parents house or throwing out lounge chairs and sleeping bags somewhere in the mountains. At the time I cooked at a place in the am and was the bartender at night down stairs in the same place. Many nights we threw the sleeping bags on the dance floor and slept in the bar.We had the same name and it was hilarious when the phone would ring in the early AM and my dad would come to the door open it both of us sit straight up in the bed, and he says,--------telephone and at the same time we'd say which one, he'd say GD it I don't know just one of ya answer the phone! LOL Eventually my parents moved and we got a rental place on the TN river. Those were the times of our lives. As you that know me can imagine, my love of fishing and back then partying. We invented stuff to cook, the local bars were always full of construction workers and there was always a singer. If someone asked her to dance and she for whatever reason didnt want to be out there she'd motion and I'd cut in and finish the dance with her LOL. We sang, we had similar religious beliefs, we were just having fun being rebellious as we were both raised so strictly. Then she moved back to her parents after about 3 yrs and married a guy from there. We still touch base occasionally, but we certainly had a blast finishing growing up together. I tell people I was raised in SC, but I grew up in TN, but that is another story all together in my journey in the school of hard knocks.

amiyesiam

01-31-2010, 09:59 AM

Andrew, Jr.

02-01-2010, 01:05 PM

Growing up I had walls up between my siblings and myself because of the disfunction caused by my bio-father. It is the divide and conquor theory in action (he was in the army). However, when my beloved sister, JoAnn, came down with skin cancer, it just changed everything. And I mean every little thing.

Words were said that were long overdue. And we held each other like we never did before. I even kissed my sister on her cheek. Before she was nervous around me, and then she realized how silly it was. I was her adorable little brother. I was different, but I made it perfectly clear to everyone how important my sister was to me. I was the first one to donate blood, and be denied. I was the first one to offer bone marrow, and denied. Everything I could offer to save her life, I would have done in an instant. I was just too sickly to do because of my diabetes or something else going on with my health.

When she died, it was like a chunk of my heart went with her. I miss her each and every day. I get it. I messed up. I left people out of my life for whatever reason, but now I am trying to include everyone. Those who wish to decline, that is on them - not me.

My lesson is that people come first in every little or big thing. Life is just too short. I never ever want to be caught like this again. Never. Ever.

Andrew

Lady Jewel

02-01-2010, 01:26 PM

My Grandma Ruth was my best friend, my teacher, my sister, my mentor, and my soulmate. She listened without judgement. Taught without lecturing. Gave without expecting anything in return. Shared unconditionally with an open spirit. The world was her child that she loved. My Grandmother was everything a best friend should be. Gawd, I miss her.

Jewel

Diva

02-01-2010, 02:32 PM

NJFemmie

02-01-2010, 02:51 PM

My best friend listens without judging
My best friend holds my truth
My best friend makes me laugh
My best friend keeps me honest
My best friend calls me on my shit
My best friend heals me
My best friend keeps my secrets <--although sometimes, not so much, lol
My best friend lets me act an ass when I feel like it
My best friend soothes my soul
My best friend kicks my ass when needed
My best friend loves me unconditionally
My best friend is my wife.
:givingarose:

Precisely why Mare is my bestest friend, evah.

Deborah

02-01-2010, 03:07 PM

You may not know me but I am not the type to get all sappy on a public forum and those that read my post know I am a professed 'hater' but reading about everyones best friends made me so sad that I had to do this post partly because in my way of thinking my best friend although she is gone will see this somehow and know she will always be a part of me.

You see my best friend is Rebecca, we met in 7th grade she was the new girl coming in the middle of the semester...and she was so pretty...and shy. Now me I wasn't shy (although I have learned to be reserved) so I just quite confidently told her there are 2 boys in the 7th grade and they cant both be my boyfriend so since she was so pretty I knew one of them could be hers...we spent the remainder of the school year trading those two boys back and forth about every 2 weeks...life went on... and that was where my career dancing for juke box quarters in the bowling alley started, Rebecca and I at 13 years old...

I was in her wedding, I was Godmother to her son, I was there when her 4 year old daughter had open heart surgery, I was there through her divorce...I was there through every surgery, every heartbreak, every up and down. Unfortunately the downs were more than Rebecca could handle...as a young teenager she was a cutter, as an adult she was an alcoholic...she tried to be happy but it eluded her...she just couldn't see it or appreciate it...she was ill and there was no one but Rebecca that could help her and she just wasn't strong enough...she gave up that fight a year ago this month by getting into her car in her closed garage and turning on the ignition.

I know at that moment she didn't believe she was loved enough to stay here and fight the fight...but I hope she knows now that I loved her then so very much and did all those 44 years and as the anniversary of that night comes and goes I love her still...and miss her more than I can say...hold those you love dear as I am sure you all do and never miss a chance to tell them...

I love you and miss you Rebecca, till we meet again. :rrose:

SuperFemme

02-01-2010, 03:24 PM

YouTube- Queen - 'You're My Best Friend'

Diva

02-01-2010, 05:09 PM

Gemme

02-06-2010, 12:47 AM

Like the Berry, I have friends that fall into different categories, but I'm only going to talk about one now.

There is Jeff (not her real name but is part of a family joke). We've known each other for so long, we argue about WHEN we met. She says it was one year and she was NOT on crutches. I say it was the year before and she WAS on crutches. She spent a lot of time crutches, for the record.

Tomato. To mah toe.

The point is, we've known each other since grade school. We're both Geminis and, for 5 days each year, we are the same age. We both love the written word and reading and talking and thinking and theorizing about things that are inconsequential to anything and anyone. I can only be like that with her. I can also have an entire conversation with her without saying a word. Silence is not weighted or timed with her. It just is.

She was the one who never wanted kids and I wanted a huge house full of the little buggers. Fast forward....she has my heart nephew (the happiest accident she's ever had) and I, minus one miscarriage, have none. Both of us are divorced, although I have one up on her. As the older of the two, I guess it's my job to do things 'more' than her.

She wanted to work for a museum, to travel the deserts and to be a fantastical archeologist. She has always had such passion for it; I just KNEW she'd be excellent at it. Plus, she's got good German blood in her and tans in a heartbeat, the brat. Her skin can take the desert.

I wanted love. I wanted a family. I wanted to save all of the children of the world, but my hopes of going into social work were dashed very early on. I would have liked to become independently wealthy getting that family and saving those kids, but I wouldn't be picky, as long as everything I wanted happened. Oooopsie. *wry grin*

If either of us were to win the Lottery, I know EXACTLY who we would bestow the money to and in EXACTLY the order we'd do it and neither of us would give it to the other first. We're linked like that. She's one of those, like some of you have mentioned, that can pick up right where we left off. We can even pick up the exact conversation we were having then.

Her mother was my surrogate mother and, for a short time, I lived with her family. They are a big family, in every way, and they enveloped me into their core....the safety of their womb....with no thought whatsoever. Many years earlier, they'd done what they could to minimize the time I spent at home and to keep me safer. They knew something wasn't right, though I never said a word about what was happening.

She and her mom are the ONLY reasons I went to college. The only reasons I've become more than a welfare check. Without either of them, but especially Jeff, I'd have given in to my demons a long time ago. And that's the best friend you could ever have.....one who gives enough of their soul to keep yours intact when you need it.

I have more to say but I'm at work and I need to skidaddle.

suebee

02-06-2010, 08:59 AM

Throughout the years I've had different "best friends". There was Judy throughout grade school and Jr. High, and then when we went to different high schools I made friends with Karen, Bev and Paula. The four of us were inseparable. Three of us went to live in the same city to go to school and our friendship continued for years. Since then I've always had a number of really close friends - friends I would trust my life with. As a matter of fact I did so litterally when I had surgery for lung cancer a couple of years ago, and named Mary and Pat as co-medical trustees - you know, In case anything went wrong.

I think I went through a long period as an adult wondering why I didn't have A best friend. Then I came to realize that each of my friends occupies a different place in my heart - fills a different need - allows me to be a little more of who I am. I am blessed. I truly am.

But yet again the Universe decided to bless me.

My best friend now is my beloved Ima Dandy. She's my heart and soul. We like doing the same things. It's the little things that count: walking on the beach as often as we can, hunting for bargains, cuddling while we watch a video, dreaming what to do to make the house truly OURS.

It doesn't get much better than this.

I'm one lucky :floatbee:

IttyBittyFem

02-07-2010, 03:39 AM

SnipMy best friend now is my beloved Ima Dandy. She's my heart and soul. We like doing the same things. It's the little things that count: walking on the beach as often as we can, hunting for bargains, cuddling while we watch a video, dreaming what to do to make the house truly OURS.

It doesn't get much better than this.

I'm one lucky :floatbee:

Indeed, this is refeshingly touching. I just adore a happily ever after story. Thank you for sharing. :)

RNguy

02-07-2010, 07:21 AM

Sachita

02-07-2010, 08:13 AM

VERY COOL BUDDY
I agree, your best friend should be your wife!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Mine surely is.

It sounds so cliche, right? lol

and although I haven't had a lot of relationships I never thought it was possible to have everything in one person.

I am on this amazing journey with a wonderful man. (wolfwalker) and each day we seem to reach deeper and deeper into each others soul. It's romantic as hell but the most exciting part of this is the friendship we are building. For me this is the foundation of everything we do. Never have I ever felt like I could share everything. This is extraordinary.

I've said it in another thread... when you find this I think that the friendship is the real glue that keeps a marriage together. When you stop wanting to make each other happy or stop sharing your deepest secrets, no matter what it is, you can kiss it all goodbye.

Hack

02-07-2010, 09:38 AM

Because of my line of work, I tend to know a ton of people, but I only keep a very close circle of friends. And the people I trust I can count on one hand.

That said, nearly all my close friends are people I met through my work. I tend to gravitate toward creative or political types. And they tend to be low maintenance friends who don't get all bent out of shape if I go weeks without seeing them because I'm too busy at work. They get what I do, and know it is important to me.

My closest friends are straight males. I have few close female friends.

IttyBittyFem

02-07-2010, 09:44 AM

As I read each unique testament, your memories so moving, I see such an abundance of pure unconditional love.

I'm humbled by each and every one of you that contributed your own extraordinary story of love with your best friend.

I look upon all of you, truly, as extended 'Family'. This past year has been a bit more challenging for me. During this time, I recognize I've been leaning on all of you for extra support. Through your personal experiences of joy you so courageously have been expressing, you've made my heart smile. Thank you all so very very very much for keeping my spirits up.

DoubleXL

02-24-2011, 08:41 PM

I think I am so very fortunate that one of my best friends is my exwife, PinkieLee. I would never in a million years thought that she would be one of my biggest supporters, the world's greatest cheerleader and always provide a shoulder to cry on after we parted ways several years ago. But I guess after putting up with me for over 7 years, she decided I was still worth the effort. Who else would bring a stash of beer to your mother's funeral because they knew you were going to need one after dealing with your family all day!!! Now, that is a true friend. I love you PinkieLee, you are one of the most wonderful women I know!!:missu:

lionpaw

02-24-2011, 10:55 PM

My best friend loves me unconditionally.
My best friend showed me how much more enjoyable life is with positive thinking.
My best friend showed me how not to own other peoples' crap as mine.
My best friend showed me how to slow down and smell the roses of life.
My best friend let me be me.
My best friend let's me know when I've been wrong.
My best friend showed me how to laugh again.
My best friend showed me how to be strong.
My best friend has my back.
My best friend is my wife.

Stud_puppy1991

05-26-2011, 12:52 PM

I have a few good best friends. They have seen me at my worst, and I have seen them at theirs. We do everything together and we share everything. My main best friend is Cherico, and she and I have a tight bond. I first met her when i was a junior in high school and she was a sophomore. I met her at our school's S.T.R.I.D.E. club. (Students and Teachers Respecting Individuality, Diversity, and Equality club.) I went over to talk to her and the rest is history. I had a huge crush on her at one point, and we ended up going out. She is also the first one i ever came out to. We were the most "interesting" couple, seeing a butch with a victorian goth, but it was a good relationship. However, it died down, because it was just too awkward for her. But, our bond is still tight. She is my rock. She's stuck by me through everything. Especially when i lost my dad.
She and I are like sisters, but we are great. I'm the March Hare, She's the Mad Hatter.

Gemme

05-26-2011, 09:51 PM

Today is my best friend's birthday!

:danceparty:
:birthday:

Amber2010

06-21-2011, 08:29 AM

Precisely why Mare is my bestest friend, evah.
I am very very lucky because I have a wonderful best friend and have had her for most of my life. We can go weeks hey even months not talking and then we pick up right where we left off. I never feel like I have to watch what I say or how I say things. She gets me every time. I feel lucky and blessed to have her in my life and I thank God every single day for her...
TJ you are the best thing this world has to offer.... I love you very much!

Ms. Tabitha

06-21-2011, 10:01 AM

I have a friendship with a select few I have met on this site and I'm proud to call them friends. They are a phone call away for a quick hello or to share something funny. They have also been known to drive you to the hospital and for you to come out of surgery. When these friends are not feeling their best, sprite and chicken soup magically appear.

Lynn (Txscharmr) and Shannon, not on this site, are my "BFF's". These two people have not only been there for me through the good and bad times, but they have seen me at my worst and my best and I love them both very much. T is also my best friend and my greatest love. We have shared so much over the past, almost 6 years. We have a very strong foundation and an unconditional love and respect for one another. We can share our deepest secrets and fears.

I am very blessed to have these unselfish loving people in my life!!
:rrose:

VuDu

06-21-2011, 02:16 PM

I am very very lucky because I have a wonderful best friend and have had her for most of my life. We can go weeks hey even months not talking and then we pick up right where we left off. I never feel like I have to watch what I say or how I say things. She gets me every time. I feel lucky and blessed to have her in my life and I thank God every single day for her...
TJ you are the best thing this world has to offer.... I love you very much!

Awwww *tosses in some hearts and shyt*

Exactly what I needed to read today.

My bestie is one in a million. I know that I can 911 her at any time, day or night, and she is right there for me. Growing up together has made us close but the laughter and love we share makes us instoppable (terror & trouble lol).

Amber2010

07-21-2011, 05:46 PM

Awwww *tosses in some hearts and shyt*

Exactly what I needed to read today.

My bestie is one in a million. I know that I can 911 her at any time, day or night, and she is right there for me. Growing up together has made us close but the laughter and love we share makes us instoppable (terror & trouble lol).

So many people walk in and out of our lives...
A Best friend is there FOREVER ....
No mattter what else is going on in my life
I know you are there... It makes life a little easier even on the worst
days of my life...
Yes we are trouble... but the best kind.... "giggles"

rubygirl

07-21-2011, 07:23 PM

I have been very lucky through out my life with having many friends. However, the one that means a lot to me is a friend I met when I was 7. She and I were each other's shadow. We even looked like twins. Our families knew each other so playing with her was easy to do. There were so many similarities between the two of us. Now, we are very different but that doesn't matter. Neither our differences, nor time, nor life can change how we feel about each other. We have gone years without talking but that first time we reconnected was as if no time had passed. It is because of this dear friend that I came to realize my true sexuality. Without knowing it, my bf changed me for the better.

bigbutchmistie

07-21-2011, 07:33 PM

I have good friends. I wouldnt say a best friend. I guess its cause I believe one's partner should be their best friend... :)

atomiczombie

07-21-2011, 07:56 PM

My best friend doesn't consider me hys best friend, but hy is mine nonetheless. Hy is my best friend because I can tell hym ANYTHING and hy won't judge me. Hy understands me in ways no one else can. Hy always has my back and supports me no matter what is going on in my life. When we don't talk for a while, usually when I am shutting out the whole world, hy calls from time to time just to check up on me and let me know hy cares. Whatever happens in my life, I know I can count on hym and he won't abandon me. I have other friends, a few I consider super close, but none that are really dedicated to me and have my back the way hy does. And I love hym for it. I will always be there for hym no matter what cause hy is an extraordinary person.

msW8ing

07-30-2011, 08:11 AM

My best friend started as a date. We quickly realized that our "connection" wasn't romantic but soulful on so many levels. We've been through some shit and always had and will have each others back. Catch each other when we fall or stumble. She's been there when I came out and my family turned thier backs on me. She was there to watch my kids grow, my biggest supporter when I was working 2 and 3 jobs and just felt I couldn't do it another second she somehow knew what to say to give me the strength to continue the fight. I was there when her son passed of SIDS, her daughter and drug addiction, her husband (who has become like a brother to me now) was diagnosed with CHF and she with her illness. We're so connected we has ESP..when I need her she calls without me saying a word and visa versa..it's just like we "know". I'd kill or die for her in a heartbeat without regret or hesitation and she for me. She calls my kids hers. And is just as fiercly protective of them as I. And doesn't hesitate for a second if they need an ass kicking. When my first grandbaby was born and I lived 5 states away and couldn't be there she went to the hospital (even though she can't stand the mama or that family) and took pics for me. Although we've only known each other for 10 or so years it feels as if we've been connected our entire lifetime. To simply refer to one another as a "friend" just doesn't seem enough for us. So we call each other "soul sister" because if ever anyone made us feel whole it is one another.

T4Texas

07-30-2011, 09:52 AM

Most of my closest best friends have been gay men as opposed to women. My very best friend was a gay man that I went to high school with. We came out to each other in our senior year and that cemented a friendship that would last for years. We both went through a lot of hard times and even though I moved a few states away, we kept in touch and when he started working as a long distance truck driver, he would occasionally make it to Houston and we would spend some time together. He became ill in 1996 with an aids-related cancer and when things got bad, I drove to Florida and sat with him at the hospital for three days before he passed away. He knew I was there because he smiled real big when I came into the room, but he spent most of the time drugged up so there was no time to catch up or to say those things you want to say to a person at such times. I just sat with him and talked to him for those three days, feeling that he heard every word. I told him how much I loved him and recounted some of our adventures and promised him I wouldnt leave him. The sad thing was that his own mother lived less than 50 miles from the hospital and she wouldnt even come to see him. I keep his picture in my bedroom and I will never forget him. He was my very best friend.
My current best friend is a woman I have known for about 30 years now. We dated for about a year at one time and then later I was there with her through her numerous relationships and all the ups and downs that go with them. We met in the early 80s at a Christmas party of a mutual friend and that night she came to sit by me and we started talking and talking to the point that her GF was giving me the evil eye across the room. *laughs*. It was like an instant connection and after all these years, the connection is still there and we can both make each other laugh like crazy or be deadly serious. She's a great person and I'm glad to have her in my life.

Amber2010

05-25-2012, 08:44 AM

My best friend and I became friends through our teen years. Well she was a teen I was early 20's but just the same we seem to be connected in a way I never had with anyone else. She became someone who I thought of all the time. Someone who just got me. I am a little nutty at times but I figured I am always working and taking care of everyone and she is someone who is there to support me but we mostly support each other. We all have our ups and downs and need someone to grab that phone and call or text and know that you will get an answer no matter the time or day. Someone to never worry about what you say or how crazy it sounds. She will tell me the truth even if it is not the answer I want to hear but still let me make my own decision and support me in it completely even if she knows it is the wrong one. I am the same way with her. It never matters who we are with or what we are doing and we work hard to keep each other grounded. I am so very blessed and thank God every day for giving her to me. I think connections with people true ones are very hard to find. Romance comes and goes but a best friend is here to stay forever no matter the trouble you find or the battles you face. They are there!!!!!!
I love you BFF so very much!

Lady_Di

05-26-2012, 08:25 PM

I can absolutely count on my best friend, absolutely. And she can depend on me for whatever it is she may need, forevermore. I adore her partner and her whole family feels like my family. We have all voiced that we are indeed family of choice for each other, though we still do love our families of origin, we have some issues shall we say... LOL

We met back in Salt Lake City many years ago, both of us going thru a rough time, and we helped each other out. Got thru it and grew in spirit together. We helped each other make so many positive changes in our respective lives. I respect her so dang much. I love her trained legal mind and her compassion for all animals of the planet. Her pet rescue history is epic, she is my hero.

We are truly there for each other. Will drop things in a red hot minute should either of us need something or what not.

Just today, I mentioned what my plans were for tomorrow and Monday, taking a load down to NM from here. And she has offered me her Lexus 4x4, which has a lot more room to pack things into. Which means less for my brother to have to take for me, next week. Might even be able to have it completely done by next weekend, which simply amazes me. I have til the 23rd to get everything out and clean, sparkling. I am ever so grateful for a best friend such as my K. Who I have a feeling will be helping me put the spit and polish on this place, so I can get my deposit back in full.

I am blessed and I know it well, deep down into my very soul.

Sarafemme

11-30-2012, 01:45 PM

I have always struggled with making friends (I'm an introvert who prefers to spend time alone, reading), let alone a best friend.

Two years ago, I met a woman online through a fanfiction-writing Website. Unlike most of the writers there, she was older (31) and a very talented writer. I was instantly drawn to her characterizations, and wanted to get to know her better.

It turned out we had a lot in common: In addition to enjoying writing, reading, and similar music, we were both married to men and childless and felt we had creative callings in our lives. After some months, she finally admitted to me that I was her best friend; she had always felt closer to men as friends and figured she would not have a female best friend again, for some reason. She was gratified that I was the one.

Needless to say, I was elated by this, and quickly returned the feelings. The next few months, we talked to each other in almost-romantic terms (lots of "my girl" and "my love"; anyone reading our communication would have thought we were in a blossoming romantic relationship. Well, it turns out, one of us was....

Quite simply, I developed a huge emotional crush on my friend. I would save endearing comments she had for me in a Word file and look at them when I was feeling down about something. I would long to talk to her every day, and when she wasn't around, I mourned. I wonder if I had done something to upset her.

Meanwhile, irony of ironies, my bestie, who was happily married and had always ID'd as straight, managed to develop a crush on a mutual online (girl) friend of ours. She did and felt similar things that I felt toward her. She told me all of this. My heart broke over and over again.

Finally, my friend called me out on my crush on her, saying she had known about it for a long time, and that to admit I was at least bisexual wouldn't have to change the way I interacted with men and women in my life; that I had, in fact, been living with it for most of my life as it was, but was just unwilling to admit it. She said she didn't feel weird about my crush and just wanted me to be honest with myself about my feelings, and that we were still best friends. (This was also about the time her own girl-crush was waning).

So, despite my crush, we are still best friends. We hope to meet in person someday (we live a 12-hour drive apart). I credit my best friend for helping me face the parts of me I was too scared to face, for helping me become more authentically /myself/, and still loving me anyway. I'm lucky to have 'met' her.

wahya

05-18-2013, 11:40 AM

My bestfriend is a gay man named Mike. We met & grew up in Germany in the early 80's. We have been in constant contact and have lived with each other off and on. Being a military brat .its hard to always to maintain friendships but we have for 32 yrs. I MEAN the best of friends. We learned guitar together written songs together. etc. in 1993 he was diognosed with HIV that crushed me. Of course not as bad as he. But fast forward to now. He is still with us. he is in his last stage of aids and is slowly dying ....just as my heart is. When we talk on the phone. He lives in houston I live in Ma. I went to see him last summer it was horrific. I thought I could handle it. I couldn't. I know it was the last time I would see him alive. I love and trust him. and whasever happens i will always be here for thid wondeful man.