Quote:
Originally Posted by ruthie14
Well, my own 2 cents is.... that if you are NOT ready for a relationship.. then you should NOT be dating. Dating to me means that you are trying to find someone who you might want a LTR with. Doesn't mean you will find them, or that you won't date ppl that you don't fit with. That is to be expected. We met on a dating site and , quite frankly, I wasn't really sure we were going to date at all. I was perfectly content to do the friend thing and get to know her. She made the approach, wanting to call it dating, sexy talk, asking questions that, INHO , you ask a potential partner, not a friend. She kept asking for sleep overs and when push came to shove, well, she just wanted to sleep and nothing more. If she just wanted a friend or a cuddlepartner... then just tell me. I would have let her know that friendship would be fine but anything more leads to gfs for me. I am always upfront with how I am. No pretense. No games. If I like you, I like you, If I don't , I don't lead you to believe otherwise. I dunno, maybe time will give me a perspective I just can't see in this moment. Right now I am confused and hurt. Hard to look to much beyond that right now.
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you make some good points. Instead of everyone making assumptions or risking miscommunication, maybe you just come out with your expectations in the beginning. What's wrong with saying "I'm looking for a relationship eventually"?
I'm sorry you're hurting, I know what that feels like. For me, I'll date only—no relationships or commitments which I make very clear. Anyway, I hope you'll feel better. But you're not an idiot—just seems to me, there was lack of clear communication.
take care ruthie,
j
it always gets better