[AtLast]

Originally Posted by honeybarbara

sorry I'm a bit confused. Of course if you get married you have to go through the same legal ritual of divorce if you end it. It's a legal contract involving notice to the gov't about your status. If that should change, you have to declare it. like if you job changes. or you move and you still wish to vote.

So I'm kinda lost. it's all exactly the same. You have to undo what was done. after falling out. which makes things hellish.

I can't imagine the kind of hoop jumping inki and I have been doing for a year through four different countries to get it *undone* but with extremely sore feelings and deep feelings of hurt and rejection at the same time, rather than a sense of joy and certainty. dear god that sounds like hell on earth to me.

I hope, if it ever happens I can be as civil as my parents were. They screwed up. But they didn't fight over the kids, they never fought in front of us, they shared one lawyer between them to save costs.

I so like hearing this! when I did work as a family therapist with divorcing couples, what transpired betwen the partners not only in front of the kids, but in manipulating the kids was the most difficult challenge in the work. many people do not go there, but so often, this is the exception. Kudos to your parents! also, it is obvious that that modeling would be an asset for you if you did find yoursekves in a dissolution.
and there was a *lot* of serious wounding between the two of them. Both felt completely betrayed, ignored, disliked and belittled.

But they got over it and are good friends now.

Yup, can happen!

I think that shows a different kind of commitment, especially as they did it initially (trying to get along through a divorce) because of the kids. My hat off to them.

Mine, too!

I have been wondering how same-sex divorces would play out. One problem I am having is with this one being a celebrity oriented one in which privacy is just not going to happen. Guess, I want to see how just we commoners handle it. We don't really have the experience of a legally sanctioned marriage, let alone divorce. I see some key differences just due to our lack of having this right which has influenced our relationship history.