[Turtle]

I want to talk about identity. I've been wanting to talk about it for a while now. I suppose for some time now, I've had an internal debate going about what identity is and what its role is in a human life.- I think our lives are about being and/or becoming more and more authentic as we grow through different stages

I chose the above quote to start this discussion because it contains within it a small definition of identity which I had not heard: *

identity: a way to avoid having to become an authentic person I think identity can be too much of a focus and end up being a distraction, but it doesn't need to be.

I identify as a lot of different stuff. This definition interests me, because I hadn't heard it put that way before, though I did feel a great deal of pressure to identify when I first came out. Yeah, who are you/what are you? Declare yourself and in some groups you know you will no longer be welcome if you declare as the wrong whatever. AND indentifying with a group can be part of the process of figuring out who I am and who I am not, what do I want to be or do - or not.

So I have some questions floating around and I'd love to hear other people's takes on these:

Do you feel the identity or identities you carry are barriers to authenticity or do you think of them as means of expressing your authenticity? I have not been very good at fitting into boxes in my life and I'm cool with that. Forever in between the categoriesand sometimes I have moods that are stronger than usual and I'll think more about trying testosterone or maybe I will get another motorcycle, but usually I'm just regular old me....and when I was 15 and had to put on my bad-ass walk when I went out and I refused to cry - neither one of which was healthy.

Or, to put it another way, what do you feel the relationship is between identity and authenticity? I think much of the time, identity is a vehicle to get to know yourself better, including when "indentity" changes or melds. Identity may define us in a role - student, sister, parent, etc. - and as life goes on we have more and more layers.

Do you feel like identity unites or divides or both or neither? Anyone may choose any direction with this.

What does identity offer you? I have very much enjoyed being at a conference and identifying with a group, going to workshops, discussing, sorting out bits and pieces, and being a part of a large group. And in the end, it's just me in this skin.

What does it take from you? At times, I have been too much about the boots, the jeans, the bad-ass...for me life is way easier and better without the crap.

Do you see your identity as flexible? VERY.

Have you felt pressure to identify? In the past, but not for a very long time.

I have so many mixed feelings at the moment, but do feel some division between my identity and my most authentic self - but I feel like my most authentic self is the person in charge of my identity if that makes sense. I feel like here in this community, I bring both my identity and my authenticity, but then if I hung out with you, you might get a different and equally authentic experience. From where I sit "mixity" is good. Mix it up, try it on, play with it...and be real. YAY!! Thanks NAT!! I believe that we are all works in process.