Identity, Authenticity - Do they conflict?

Turtle · 01-10-2011, 02:52 AM

I want to talk about identity. I've been wanting to talk about it for a while now. I suppose for some time now, I've had an internal debate going about what identity is and what its role is in a human life.- I think our lives are about being and/or becoming more and more authentic as we grow through different stages

I chose the above quote to start this discussion because it contains within it a small definition of identity which I had not heard: *

identity: a way to avoid having to become an authentic person I think identity can be too much of a focus and end up being a distraction, but it doesn't need to be.

I identify as a lot of different stuff. This definition interests me, because I hadn't heard it put that way before, though I did feel a great deal of pressure to identify when I first came out. Yeah, who are you/what are you? Declare yourself and in some groups you know you will no longer be welcome if you declare as the wrong whatever. AND indentifying with a group can be part of the process of figuring out who I am and who I am not, what do I want to be or do - or not.

So I have some questions floating around and I'd love to hear other people's takes on these:

Do you feel the identity or identities you carry are barriers to authenticity or do you think of them as means of expressing your authenticity? I have not been very good at fitting into boxes in my life and I'm cool with that. Forever in between the categoriesand sometimes I have moods that are stronger than usual and I'll think more about trying testosterone or maybe I will get another motorcycle, but usually I'm just regular old me....and when I was 15 and had to put on my bad-ass walk when I went out and I refused to cry - neither one of which was healthy.

Or, to put it another way, what do you feel the relationship is between identity and authenticity? I think much of the time, identity is a vehicle to get to know yourself better, including when "indentity" changes or melds. Identity may define us in a role - student, sister, parent, etc. - and as life goes on we have more and more layers.

Do you feel like identity unites or divides or both or neither? Anyone may choose any direction with this.

What does identity offer you? I have very much enjoyed being at a conference and identifying with a group, going to workshops, discussing, sorting out bits and pieces, and being a part of a large group. And in the end, it's just me in this skin.

What does it take from you? At times, I have been too much about the boots, the jeans, the bad-ass...for me life is way easier and better without the crap.

Do you see your identity as flexible? VERY.

Have you felt pressure to identify? In the past, but not for a very long time.

I have so many mixed feelings at the moment, but do feel some division between my identity and my most authentic self - but I feel like my most authentic self is the person in charge of my identity if that makes sense. I feel like here in this community, I bring both my identity and my authenticity, but then if I hung out with you, you might get a different and equally authentic experience. From where I sit "mixity" is good. Mix it up, try it on, play with it...and be real. YAY!! Thanks NAT!! I believe that we are all works in process.

weatherboi · 01-10-2011, 10:42 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Nat

identity: a way to avoid having to become an authentic person

Do you feel the identity or identities you carry are barriers to authenticity or do you think of them as means of expressing your authenticity?it is a means of expressing how i feel inside. transgendered verbiage is not recognized or understood widely through out this country. that is the barrier. how the world reads me usually comes from a space where they have no knowledge of an identity that is authentic to me.

Or, to put it another way, what do you feel the relationship is between identity and authenticity? *
i think that relationship is relative to each person. for example, a queer person in closet at work or a queer person not out to their family. i don't think this set of circumstances makes a person inauthentic.

Do you feel like identity unites or divides or both or neither?
i have seen it do both. for myself, my identity unifies me, even when the rest of the world reads me as something i am not. i have also seen it divide and create much tension with people i know and love but that is on them.

What does identity offer you?
a safe space in my own mind so i don't get disconnected from my physical self.
What does it take from you?
for a second, i think it takes away opportunity to know certain people but then i think...their loss!!!

Do you see your identity as flexible?
not really flexible...sometimes i am fluid because i can be a swishy kinda guy.

Have you felt pressure to identify?
no...my identity is a very personal part of me that isn't formed through pressure but is formed from a need to align myself with what i see in the mirror and in my mind.
.

I don't really feel a division within myself over my identity and my authenticity. I feel divided outwardly when people judge me for decisions I make regarding my identity, so I am guarded in the company I keep.

Sooo does identity and authenticity conflict??
It could happen if i was to allow myself to recognize identities and labels as a hierarchy/value system but i don't. I try to do my best to be a person of my word and this provides me personal authenticity. When I am not of my word I don't feel authentic. I try not to place a value system on authenticity because we all have circumstances that are different and special so my hope is people provide me with a benefit of the doubt I try and provide them with.

Chazz · 01-27-2011, 11:05 AM

Hi, I'm new here and wanted to say hello.

I'm not one to label myself. My persona is in balance with my inner being. These days, I don't give "identity" much thought unless someone else brings the issue up, or it's pertinent to a conversation.

It's a relief not to be self-preoccupied, though I do think that identity self-preoccupation is a necessary part of the "coming-out" process. It's not something we do to ourselves. It's a feature of growing up in the false duality of masculine/feminine and imposed heterosexuality. It is possible to get stuck in self-preoccupation, but coming out the other side of that is a huge relief.

DomnNC · 01-27-2011, 12:14 PM

Interesting questions and responses. I define me, I define my identity and I did that a long time ago even in high school and before. I know what my identity is and I don't need anyone to validate that, period. As long as I'm true to MY chosen identity then I'm being authentic to myself and others. It's just that simple to me.

Andrew, Jr. · 01-27-2011, 03:53 PM

I know who and what I am for as long as I can remember. I am not sure I really understand the authenticity and identity conflict. What does this mean?

Greyson · 10-24-2012, 01:11 PM

Yet another thought provoking thread started by you Nat. Thank you. I don't know how I missed this one up until today. I was looking for an appropriate thread to post a link to an article about a young genderqueer student at UC Berkeley. The article speaks to "Multiple Identites."

I know for me as a Queer person with multiple identies sometimes in the LGBTQ community I think some of the whole of who I am does get muddled. I am not only a gender, race, class, I am "other" which at times seem to have divergent needs.

For me my identities assist in my becoming more and more authenic. I am a viable part of the whole. (IMO we all are.) If I have no self understanding, self knowledge, self acceptance how does it color the whole of which I am a part?

Anyway, here is the link to the article about the young person who is part of our LGBTQ community and more.

__________________________________________________ ___________

“Queer students here hold multifaceted identities and belong to multiple communities,” Rosas said, adding “many of whose lives are impacted by decisions such as these.”

http://newscenter.berkeley.edu/2012/10/23/33306/

Nat · 10-25-2012, 06:11 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Greyson

Yet another thought provoking thread started by you Nat. Thank you. I don't know how I missed this one up until today. I was looking for an appropriate thread to post a link to an article about a young genderqueer student at UC Berkeley. The article speaks to "Multiple Identites."

I know for me as a Queer person with multiple identies sometimes in the LGBTQ community I think some of the whole of who I am does get muddled. I am not only a gender, race, class, I am "other" which at times seem to have divergent needs.

For me my identities assist in my becoming more and more authenic. I am a viable part of the whole. (IMO we all are.) If I have no self understanding, self knowledge, self acceptance how does it color the whole of which I am a part?

Anyway, here is the link to the article about the young person who is part of our LGBTQ community and more.

__________________________________________________ ___________

“Queer students here hold multifaceted identities and belong to multiple communities,” Rosas said, adding “many of whose lives are impacted by decisions such as these.”

http://newscenter.berkeley.edu/2012/10/23/33306/

Greyson - have I mentioned lately that you're awesome?

01-10-2011, 02:52 AM	#1
Turtle Senior Member How Do You Identify?: A mixity Preferred Pronoun?: whatever Relationship Status: chillin Join Date: Aug 2010 Location: in a really really cute little place Posts: 2,144 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 2,442 Thanked 4,529 Times in 1,220 Posts Rep Power: 21474854	Great Topic, Nat! I want to talk about identity. I've been wanting to talk about it for a while now. I suppose for some time now, I've had an internal debate going about what identity is and what its role is in a human life.- I think our lives are about being and/or becoming more and more authentic as we grow through different stages I chose the above quote to start this discussion because it contains within it a small definition of identity which I had not heard: * identity: a way to avoid having to become an authentic person I think identity can be too much of a focus and end up being a distraction, but it doesn't need to be. I identify as a lot of different stuff. This definition interests me, because I hadn't heard it put that way before, though I did feel a great deal of pressure to identify when I first came out. Yeah, who are you/what are you? Declare yourself and in some groups you know you will no longer be welcome if you declare as the wrong whatever. AND indentifying with a group can be part of the process of figuring out who I am and who I am not, what do I want to be or do - or not. So I have some questions floating around and I'd love to hear other people's takes on these: Do you feel the identity or identities you carry are barriers to authenticity or do you think of them as means of expressing your authenticity? I have not been very good at fitting into boxes in my life and I'm cool with that. Forever in between the categoriesand sometimes I have moods that are stronger than usual and I'll think more about trying testosterone or maybe I will get another motorcycle, but usually I'm just regular old me....and when I was 15 and had to put on my bad-ass walk when I went out and I refused to cry - neither one of which was healthy. Or, to put it another way, what do you feel the relationship is between identity and authenticity? I think much of the time, identity is a vehicle to get to know yourself better, including when "indentity" changes or melds. Identity may define us in a role - student, sister, parent, etc. - and as life goes on we have more and more layers. Do you feel like identity unites or divides or both or neither? Anyone may choose any direction with this. What does identity offer you? I have very much enjoyed being at a conference and identifying with a group, going to workshops, discussing, sorting out bits and pieces, and being a part of a large group. And in the end, it's just me in this skin. What does it take from you? At times, I have been too much about the boots, the jeans, the bad-ass...for me life is way easier and better without the crap. Do you see your identity as flexible? VERY. Have you felt pressure to identify? In the past, but not for a very long time. I have so many mixed feelings at the moment, but do feel some division between my identity and my most authentic self - but I feel like my most authentic self is the person in charge of my identity if that makes sense. I feel like here in this community, I bring both my identity and my authenticity, but then if I hung out with you, you might get a different and equally authentic experience. From where I sit "mixity" is good. Mix it up, try it on, play with it...and be real. YAY!! Thanks NAT!! I believe that we are all works in process.

10-24-2012, 01:11 PM	#6
Greyson Infamous Member How Do You Identify?: Transmasculine/Non-Binary Preferred Pronoun?: Hy (Pronounced He) Relationship Status: Married Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: SF Bay Area Posts: 6,589 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 21,132 Thanked 8,146 Times in 2,005 Posts Rep Power: 21474858	Yet another thought provoking thread started by you Nat. Thank you. I don't know how I missed this one up until today. I was looking for an appropriate thread to post a link to an article about a young genderqueer student at UC Berkeley. The article speaks to "Multiple Identites." I know for me as a Queer person with multiple identies sometimes in the LGBTQ community I think some of the whole of who I am does get muddled. I am not only a gender, race, class, I am "other" which at times seem to have divergent needs. For me my identities assist in my becoming more and more authenic. I am a viable part of the whole. (IMO we all are.) If I have no self understanding, self knowledge, self acceptance how does it color the whole of which I am a part? Anyway, here is the link to the article about the young person who is part of our LGBTQ community and more. __________________________________________________ ___________ “Queer students here hold multifaceted identities and belong to multiple communities,” Rosas said, adding “many of whose lives are impacted by decisions such as these.” http://newscenter.berkeley.edu/2012/10/23/33306/ __________________ Sometimes you don't realize your own strength until you come face to face with your greatest weakness. - Susan Gale

01-27-2011, 11:05 AM	#3
Chazz Member How Do You Identify?: cisBUTCH Preferred Pronoun?: hey Relationship Status: Single - gave up the farce Join Date: Jan 2011 Location: New York Posts: 265 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 103 Thanked 756 Times in 189 Posts Rep Power: 8194252	Hi, I'm new here and wanted to say hello. I'm not one to label myself. My persona is in balance with my inner being. These days, I don't give "identity" much thought unless someone else brings the issue up, or it's pertinent to a conversation. It's a relief not to be self-preoccupied, though I do think that identity self-preoccupation is a necessary part of the "coming-out" process. It's not something we do to ourselves. It's a feature of growing up in the false duality of masculine/feminine and imposed heterosexuality. It is possible to get stuck in self-preoccupation, but coming out the other side of that is a huge relief.

01-27-2011, 12:14 PM	#4
DomnNC Timed Out How Do You Identify?: Male Preferred Pronoun?: He/Him Relationship Status: Widow Join Date: Sep 2010 Location: Permanently Banned 11/15/2011 Posts: 1,223 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 2,618 Thanked 2,582 Times in 837 Posts Rep Power: 0	Interesting questions and responses. I define me, I define my identity and I did that a long time ago even in high school and before. I know what my identity is and I don't need anyone to validate that, period. As long as I'm true to MY chosen identity then I'm being authentic to myself and others. It's just that simple to me.

01-27-2011, 03:53 PM	#5
Andrew, Jr. Timed Out How Do You Identify?: Me Preferred Pronoun?: He Relationship Status: Unavailable Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Over the Rainbow in a House Posts: 5,072 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 16,004 Thanked 5,249 Times in 2,216 Posts Rep Power: 0	I know who and what I am for as long as I can remember. I am not sure I really understand the authenticity and identity conflict. What does this mean?