Quote:
Originally Posted by Waldo
Hey you fabulous people!
I'm sorry people, I've not been feeling all that Fabulously Singular lately. Well, mostly I've not been singular and there have even been a few days when I've not been feeling fabulous. But I'm back in the saddle.
Lesson #3: Learning to take, and give, a sincere compliment.
DISCLAIMER: I am not speaking about a compliment from a stranger or some lecherous random you've just met. I'm discussing compliments from friends, family, lovers or acquaintances.
Compliments are hard to hear because they come from a lens that we don't have the privilege of seeing through. Someone else is accessing you and making a comment they believe imparts worth. We can choose to "pshaw" the compliment and degrade the person making it, or we can choose to believe that they see something in or about us as valuable.
Let's just give people the benefit of the doubt and accept the compliment with grace, even if you don't feel that way about yourself. "No, I'm not", "Oh, not really", "Don't be ridiculous" or my personal fav "You HAVE to say that!" are not acceptable responses when someone compliments you.
A simple "thank you", "you're too kind" or "you're kind to say so." will, however, convey that you value their kindness without appearing to be too vain. If you're really just not feeling it you can even go as far as saying "you're a dear for saying so, but I'm just not feeling it today".
Until next time...
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My Grandmother told me the same thing when I was 11. Always accept the compliment with grace and say "Thank you!"
Quote:
Originally Posted by pajara2
Lesson #4 (?) If you're into the arts. If there's an exhibit that you really like, find out what time they have guided Docent tours of it and go. It gives you someone else (or sometimes several someone elses) to discuss pieces and their interpretations.
Same with book clubs. Every local library usually has some kind of monthly book club.
I'm too big a people watcher to give a rat's ass if people look at me 'cause I'm alone somewhere. I am really good at giving sincere compliments, part of what makes me such a successful flirt I think. And I'm getting better at accepting them.
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Great ideas! I am jealous you will be close to the Murfreesboto Library, I love it!
and
You are one of the sweetest complimenters I know
and yes, a successful flirt. Pondering my own flirtational skills and planning to dust them off someday. Heh.