Waldo's Guide to Being a Singular Sensation

[Waldo]

Hey you fabulous people!

I'm sorry people, I've not been feeling all that Fabulously Singular lately. Well, mostly I've not been singular and there have even been a few days when I've not been feeling fabulous. But I'm back in the saddle.

Lesson #3: Learning to take, and give, a sincere compliment.

DISCLAIMER: I am not speaking about a compliment from a stranger or some lecherous random you've just met. I'm discussing compliments from friends, family, lovers or acquaintances.

Compliments are hard to hear because they come from a lens that we don't have the privilege of seeing through. Someone else is accessing you and making a comment they believe imparts worth. We can choose to "pshaw" the compliment and degrade the person making it, or we can choose to believe that they see something in or about us as valuable.

Let's just give people the benefit of the doubt and accept the compliment with grace, even if you don't feel that way about yourself. "No, I'm not", "Oh, not really", "Don't be ridiculous" or my personal fav "You HAVE to say that!" are not acceptable responses when someone compliments you.

A simple "thank you", "you're too kind" or "you're kind to say so." will, however, convey that you value their kindness without appearing to be too vain. If you're really just not feeling it you can even go as far as saying "you're a dear for saying so, but I'm just not feeling it today".

Until next time...

W

[msW8ing]

Umm what happened to #2 did I miss it?

[Waldo]

Originally Posted by MsW8ing

Umm what happened to #2 did I miss it?

It's up there: http://www.butchfemmeplanet.com/foru...1&postcount=24

[msW8ing]

Thank you I appreciate it

[Diva]

This is a nice thread.....

I don't care for dining out alone, but I have. I've never noticed anyone staring, but if I notice someone staring (anywhere, not just a restaurant), I usually stare back. It's a fun sport.

My voice teacher called me on my inability to accept a compliment in college. She told me if she ever heard me deny a compliment she would fail me for the semester. That sorta gets Your attention!!! And besides ~ if I deny someone that compliment ~ I am basically saying, 'You don't know what You're talking about!'.........an insult. So when it was explained to me like that, I learned [the very difficult lesson] to be gracious.

I've been living alone now for 4 years...... I have received great happiness being back in my childhood home and nurturing myself.

Thanks for this thread, Waldo!

[Apocalipstic]

Originally Posted by Waldo

Hey you fabulous people!

I'm sorry people, I've not been feeling all that Fabulously Singular lately. Well, mostly I've not been singular and there have even been a few days when I've not been feeling fabulous. But I'm back in the saddle.

Lesson #3: Learning to take, and give, a sincere compliment.

DISCLAIMER: I am not speaking about a compliment from a stranger or some lecherous random you've just met. I'm discussing compliments from friends, family, lovers or acquaintances.

Compliments are hard to hear because they come from a lens that we don't have the privilege of seeing through. Someone else is accessing you and making a comment they believe imparts worth. We can choose to "pshaw" the compliment and degrade the person making it, or we can choose to believe that they see something in or about us as valuable.

Let's just give people the benefit of the doubt and accept the compliment with grace, even if you don't feel that way about yourself. "No, I'm not", "Oh, not really", "Don't be ridiculous" or my personal fav "You HAVE to say that!" are not acceptable responses when someone compliments you.

A simple "thank you", "you're too kind" or "you're kind to say so." will, however, convey that you value their kindness without appearing to be too vain. If you're really just not feeling it you can even go as far as saying "you're a dear for saying so, but I'm just not feeling it today".

Until next time...

W

My Grandmother told me the same thing when I was 11. Always accept the compliment with grace and say "Thank you!"

Originally Posted by pajara2

Lesson #4 (?) If you're into the arts. If there's an exhibit that you really like, find out what time they have guided Docent tours of it and go. It gives you someone else (or sometimes several someone elses) to discuss pieces and their interpretations.

Same with book clubs. Every local library usually has some kind of monthly book club.

I'm too big a people watcher to give a rat's ass if people look at me 'cause I'm alone somewhere. I am really good at giving sincere compliments, part of what makes me such a successful flirt I think. And I'm getting better at accepting them.

A

Great ideas! I am jealous you will be close to the Murfreesboto Library, I love it!

and

You are one of the sweetest complimenters I know and yes, a successful flirt. Pondering my own flirtational skills and planning to dust them off someday. Heh.

[Apocalipstic]

Originally Posted by apocalipstic

My Grandmother told me the same thing when I was 11. Always accept the compliment with grace and say "Thank you!"



Great ideas! I am jealous you will be close to the Murfreesboto Library, I love it!

and

You are one of the sweetest complimenters I know and yes, a successful flirt. Pondering my own flirtational skills and planning to dust them off someday. Heh.

Gahhh Murfreesboro

[dixie]

Originally Posted by Waldo

Hey you fabulous people!

I'm sorry people, I've not been feeling all that Fabulously Singular lately. Well, mostly I've not been singular and there have even been a few days when I've not been feeling fabulous. But I'm back in the saddle.

Lesson #3: Learning to take, and give, a sincere compliment.

DISCLAIMER: I am not speaking about a compliment from a stranger or some lecherous random you've just met. I'm discussing compliments from friends, family, lovers or acquaintances.

Compliments are hard to hear because they come from a lens that we don't have the privilege of seeing through. Someone else is accessing you and making a comment they believe imparts worth. We can choose to "pshaw" the compliment and degrade the person making it, or we can choose to believe that they see something in or about us as valuable.

Let's just give people the benefit of the doubt and accept the compliment with grace, even if you don't feel that way about yourself. "No, I'm not", "Oh, not really", "Don't be ridiculous" or my personal fav "You HAVE to say that!" are not acceptable responses when someone compliments you.

A simple "thank you", "you're too kind" or "you're kind to say so." will, however, convey that you value their kindness without appearing to be too vain. If you're really just not feeling it you can even go as far as saying "you're a dear for saying so, but I'm just not feeling it today".

Until next time...

W

That's a really good one. It's also something I have been learning to do better at. It's easy if someone says "oh that's a cute top" or something general like that. However, if they're complimenting something about me then it's actually really uncomfortable because I obviously don't see what they see. I used to be really bad to mumble and say "nah..." while looking at my shoelaces but I'm getting better at just saying thank you. It really tickles me and makes me feel good when folks say something, it just feels kinda odd because I feel that they should be saying it to someone else, not me. I like giving compliments though.

[Rockinonahigh]

Singular dineing is something I do now and then,at home I cook for my son and myself,recently a couple of gay boys opened a coffee shop thats on my way home from work, so now and then I have a meal there..the food is good to.When I eat at home usely I eat sitting in my recliner and my son goes to his room to eat while watching tv.Unless we have gone out for a meal I cant remember when we have sat at the table to eat.

[pajama]

Lesson #4 (?) If you're into the arts. If there's an exhibit that you really like, find out what time they have guided Docent tours of it and go. It gives you someone else (or sometimes several someone elses) to discuss pieces and their interpretations.

Same with book clubs. Every local library usually has some kind of monthly book club.

I'm too big a people watcher to give a rat's ass if people look at me 'cause I'm alone somewhere. I am really good at giving sincere compliments, part of what makes me such a successful flirt I think. And I'm getting better at accepting them.

A

[Glenn]

I will definitely dine alone somewhere if the environment and food is pleasant, where there is a sense of comraderie, and compliments are freely received and given, where there is also a femme waitress who does'nt mind a dirty old Italian butch patting her on her behind

[The_Lady_Snow]

Originally Posted by popcorninthesofa

I will definitely dine alone somewhere if the environment and food is pleasant, where there is a sense of comraderie, and compliments are freely received and given, and the femme waitress does'nt mind a dirty old Italian butch patting her behind for a job well done

RUDE!!!!!!!!

That kind of behavior will get your bootie thrown out the restaurant!