[kannon]

Originally Posted by Semantics

1. People who habitually use a lot of exclamation points in a row make me feel nervous, even through a computer screen. I feel like if I were close to them at that very moment they might be yelling or flailing their arms around.

2. I have a phobia about getting a paper cut in my eye and my friends like to irritate me by making paper airplanes while we're sitting in restaurants.

3. I'm not out at my job because one of the judges is notoriously biased against homosexuals and I don't want it to affect my clients. I resent feeling trapped in the closet by a puritanical old asshole so I always wear very high heels on days when I'm assigned to his courtroom because he's also quite short and towering over him makes me feel authoritative.

4. Sometimes I throw up on airplanes. It always happens when we're taking off so I can't do it in the privacy of the bathroom. The first time it happened I was fifteen and flying to Florida with friends and I didn't know what to do so I vomited down the front of my shirt. It's been almost twenty years since that first incident and a 24 hour fast and Dramamine before flying do wonders.

5. I get regular manicures, which is mostly a waste, because when I'm not working I tend to dress like a twelve year old boy. A twelve year old boy on his way to the skate park with a french manicure and a chignon.

Would this one make it easier?