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Old 10-06-2010, 08:04 PM   #1
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Default if i could leave them with one lesson...

my son... when he was about 16... asked me...
if i could only teach him one thing... what is the most important lesson he needed to know to make it...

it caught me by surprise... but after only a minutes thought i decided to tell him my thoughts on effort and rewards being equal...
his stepmom... my ex... ever practical... immediately spoke up with 'protect you credit'...

what about you? what do you think is the most important advice a youngster should heed?
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Old 10-06-2010, 09:15 PM   #2
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As Polonius told his son Laertes in Hamlet, "To thine own self be true."
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Old 10-06-2010, 09:50 PM   #3
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Learn to love and accept yourself first. Then the capacity to love and accept others will be yours.
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until you come face to face with your greatest weakness. - Susan Gale
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Old 10-06-2010, 09:51 PM   #4
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The message my father gave to me is one I have lived by my whole life. He said:

"There are only two things in this world that no one can take away from you; your knowledge and your integrity. You can choose not to learn and you can choose to compromise your integrity, but neither can be taken from you."

What he was trying to tell me was to be a lifelong learner; before you engage in something new, take the time to increase your knowledge about it and then use that knowledge to guide your choices and actions.

As for integrity, it's all about the truth; be honest in all your dealings. Never give anyone a legitimate reason to doubt what you are saying (i.e. lying). Own your mistakes. Some people will doubt you anyway based on falsehoods or misinterpretations; that is on them, but if you have maintained your integrity, you can sleep with a clear conscience knowing that such doubt is not based in fact, but rather, in conjecture.

These two premises have served me well.

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Old 10-06-2010, 11:31 PM   #5
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Default

good msgs all the way around...

i think its interesting that all of these ideas are so different but could be argued for any one of them to be the most important creed ever...


was also thinking that now... my son will be 21 next month... and... i think he does well with being true to himself... i respect his integrity... he worries about his credit and keeps up his bills...

but...

i wish that he did love himself more... and put more faith in himself... he had his heart broken more than a year ago... and.. i think it about kicked his ass... hoping he will snap out of it...
and...
my advice to him about getting out what you put in has fallen on dead ears i think... i dont think he has any idea about tomorrow... or even care...
someone pointed out a recent NYT article about 20 being a new stage of adolescence... if my kid is any indicator... i believe it...

i asked him tho... after i posted this thread.... and he quoted both mine and janines words to me... so... maybe all hope is not lost... he is a good boy... and will grow up when he is ready i guess...

Last edited by rlin; 10-06-2010 at 11:32 PM. Reason: misquoted
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Old 10-07-2010, 12:02 AM   #6
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Be the one you want to love.
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Old 10-07-2010, 12:23 AM   #7
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Hope for the best...but always be prepared for the worst
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Old 10-07-2010, 12:36 AM   #8
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What goe up comes down
Nothing lasts forever. If you think you'll be riding that "high" forever, you will be in for a big surprise. The exact opposite is true. What goes down, will surely come up. What is lost will be found. How can you not be happy forever with that advice!
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Old 10-07-2010, 05:54 AM   #9
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For every action, both positive and negative, there are consequences, both positive and negative. What you do with those actions and consequences are what shape you as a person. We are the sum of our choices big and small. How we handle this will either give us heaven or hell on earth, it is our choice.
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"So you'll die happily for your sins. You'd rather die in guilt then live in love?" Timothy Leary
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Old 10-07-2010, 06:06 AM   #10
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I don't remember her exact words, but my mother always used to say "make sure you learn how to take care of yourself, don't let anyone, man or woman, 'take care' of you."

In so many words, she was trying to say be independent.
The last time she said this to me, she died about 3 weeks later.
She was a very wise woman.
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Old 10-07-2010, 10:46 AM   #11
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Don't be afraid of change. Embrace the unknown.
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Old 10-07-2010, 11:03 AM   #12
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Don't ever fuck with anyone crazier then you are and always be the craziest person in the room. Sure she was drunk, but it was still good advice....

Credit is a good one. I have explained to my kids how it works - no one ever did for me. So is being independent, and the importance of education.

"Do what you love and the money will follow" is something I've told my kids over the years when they've asked what they should be when they grow up.
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Old 10-07-2010, 12:02 PM   #13
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Be kind...
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Texting while driving is a real KILLER!!!


‎"It takes hundreds of nuts to hold a car together...but it takes only one nut to scatter them all over the highway..."
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Old 10-07-2010, 12:55 PM   #14
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Default There's never just one thing with me, but for now...

Love with all your heart, but don't lose your mind in the process.
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Old 10-07-2010, 01:02 PM   #15
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Never be afraid to let someone know you love them.. Doesn't matter if they love you back...If you love someone make sure you tell them


oh..

Protect your credit...
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Old 10-07-2010, 02:58 PM   #16
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i look at all these words and wish like hell i wouldve lived by each one...
damn... life would be even more wonderful now!!!
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Old 10-07-2010, 03:03 PM   #17
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another very practical one I'd tell my younger self - start putting money in an IRA (and/or 401K) as early as possible.

no, retirement isn't on a 20 year old's mind much, but they will never regret starting early to save for it.
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Old 10-07-2010, 03:16 PM   #18
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Respect yourself or no one else will.

Plan for the worse. If it doesn't happen feel blessed. If it does happen feel ready.
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Old 10-07-2010, 03:40 PM   #19
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Quote:
Originally Posted by turasultana View Post
another very practical one I'd tell my younger self - start putting money in an IRA (and/or 401K) as early as possible.

no, retirement isn't on a 20 year old's mind much, but they will never regret starting early to save for it.
i have read that a huge majority of millionaires actually followed your advice
they bought a house young... and made really safe investments young...
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