Breaking The Stereotype!

[Gayla]

I saw a thread similar to this on another (no, not that one) site and thought it would fit in quite well here.

I am a firm believer in the theory that what we wear, say, think, do, like/dislike does not make us butch or femme. While I don't see it much here these days, there is still the occasional "That's not [butch/femme/trans/etc]" in reference to something one may say. I still have moments when I cringe after hitting the submit button on a post because I realized that someone may read it and think "That's not very butch!". It's almost impossible to not buy into it in some way when it's been such a huge part of our culture for so long. But the truth is, I'm not a stereotype. There many things I do, and don't do, that could be seen as un-butch. There are many things my partner does that could be seen as un-femme. I think it's time we owned up to our differences and celebrate these things are make us individuals and not just a stereotype!

So, without qualification or justification (or fear of ridicule*) please share with us those things about you that break the stereotype!


*I would really like this to be a fun, perhaps silly, maybe empowering, definitely enlightening thread. If it gets ugly, I will personally drive down to The PDX and hold a puppy hostage until June hits the delete button.

[Queerasfck]

Hi I'm E, I'm butch. I can't change my oil and have never changed a tire and I'm okay with that.

[apretty]

Originally Posted by EzeeTiger

Hi I'm E, I'm butch. I can't change my oil and have never changed a tire and I'm okay with that.

that's HOT!

(my dad made me change my oil at 16--you're really not missing much)

[UofMfan]

Originally Posted by June

Hi, I'm June and I'm a Femme. I stuck my hand up a chicken butt this week and want everyone to appreciate this as a traditionally Butch thing to do, but I broke through the stereotypes and just went for it.

Oh you trailblazer!

Hi, I am butch, I can change the oil, tires and the engine if need be, but I rather pay someone else to do it as my time is very valuable.

I scream "like a girl" (maybe because I once was one) when I unexpectedly find large moths in my apartment.

That is all I am willing to share right now and only because I don't want any puppies to be kidnapped or hurt during this exercise.

[Gayla]

Originally Posted by UofMfan

Oh you trailblazer!

I can change the oil, tires and the engine if need be, but I rather pay someone else to do it as my time is very valuable.

I scream "like a girl" (maybe because I once was one) when I unexpectedly find large moths in my apartment.

That is all I am willing to share right now and only because I don't want any puppies to be kidnapped or hurt during this exercise.

Thanks for playing but... the bold parts above are what I meant when I asked people not to qualify or justify. It's really hard for me not to do. "I own womens shoes." (but only two pairs and that's because I kinda have to for work blah blah blah). The reasons why don't matter and it doesn't make me "less butch". I guess I'm just challenging people to not worry about perception and just be honest. My hope is that someone may come to this site, confused because they think they're butch but wear women's underwear, and find a place where they can discover that's ok.

[apretty]

i will drive through alleys and swerve off of the road to check out something that someone's discarded. also, i'd race you to a dumpster.

just now we were picking up e's truck and i 'caught' myself walking 5 steps ahead and readying myself to deal with talking to the mechanic, looking over the bill, whatever the stuff is that you do--if it's your truck. (not sure if that speaks to my femme-ID or it just means i'm controlling/bossy but it's typical-me)

[Mitmo01]

I cry like and wail and hurt at things like hurt animals or crying little kids or if i feel sad--i used ot hate feeling so sensitive and i always have to fight that voice inside that says stop crying you look stoopid

My Woman is the Dom and i like it that way--bossy women are hot

I have long curly hair and it will always be long i wish i could dread it --hey im a beach bum from hawaii and my hair has always been long and usually bleacehd from the sun if i had my way lol

my underwear is like the el cheapo hanes from wally world in all kinds of fantastic colors because i dont really give a fuck about what i wear underneath my clothes since they dont usually stay on long anyway lol and the people that i care about dont give a fuck what i wear underneath my clothes lolol

I do not own womens shoes and no womens clothes but mah woman can rock the hell outta a skirt lol

I wouldnt change the oil on my car for anything id rather someone else do it

but i can change a tire and i can lift heavy shit when i want but im a lazy fucka

[JustJo]

I'm Jo and femme...

I own and use a snowblower. When the electric starter died I just started using the pull-start.

I remodeled my home office - including hanging sheet rock, framing in a window and moving all the furniture alone. This included using power tools...which I own.

I've never had my hand up a chicken, but have had my entire arm up a pregnant cow more times than I can count. Smallest hands on the dairy...tag, I'm it.

When it's time to put the air conditioner in the bedroom window, I just carry it up to the second floor from the basement. It weighs about 60 lbs.

I have ridden a bull. I did not make it to the buzzer.

[SassyLeo]

I'm femme

I can and have assembled furniture

When I was in CA visiting my mom, I troubleshot/repaired and set-up my mom's laptop and wifi (including taking her to Fry's to purchase RAM and then installing it for her)

I just went shopping with Erin at the Leatherman Warehouse sale and purchased several tools for myself (and for gifts)

I kill the spiders in the house

I can dead lift 130 lbs

[betenoire]

My name is Brandy. I am Femme. I think performing cunnilingus is fun.

I also pick my nose (it gets itchy up there, fuck off!) like reptiles and amphibians a whole lot, am loud and opinionated, and once punched someone at a bar cuz she sloshed beer on me.

[FutureNOChef]

That's awesome!!! & you know what I would do it in stilletos. You Rock!!!

[CherylNYC]

Stonefemme lesbian here.

I own and repair all seven motorcycles in my backyard.

I ride said motorcycles like an exuberant, half-mad barbarian.

I love to ride said motorcycles on the racetrack. I especially love passing the boy-racer wanna-be's who think girls can't ride.

My hair is long, but mostly styled by my helmet.

I dress in high fetish or vintage high fashion when it suits the occasion, but you're far more likely to find me in jeans and engineer boots with dirt and oil under my fingernails. (It's not as awful as it sounds for my playmates because I'm a stonefemme. Anyway, I clean up well.)

I have worked as a Union carpenter/stagehand. Now I work as a sculptor which means my work clothes are so encrusted with gak that a homeless person would not even touch them.

I have spent a small fortune on my power tools.

I do all home repair except plumbing. EEEEEWWWWWW!

I catch and kill bugs and rodents

I love to camp.

I am a lesbian who does not like dolphin shaped dildos, but I will drop to my knees in a heartbeat for the right butch cock.

[scootebaby]

Originally Posted by June

Hi, I'm June and I'm a Femme. I stuck my hand up a chicken butt this week and want everyone to appreciate this as a traditionally Butch thing to do, but I broke through the stereotypes and just went for it.

its supposed to be a hand??? well that explains the confusion of my butchness lol


[B]of course it could also be bc...
i dont know how to change oil in my car
i wont change the tire on my car unless i HAVE to
ive had a huge crush on patrick swayze since...always
i scream like a girly girl when i see a snake
i hate to break or chip a nail(not long just short and nice)
im not even close to be mechanically inclined
just to name a few...wpouldnt want to lose my butch card altogether..[/B

[SuperFemme]

I have changed my oil.
I do my own taxes.
I boss everyone around.
I am the disciplinarian in my home.
I barter with sales people/plumbers/technicians/mechanics
I belong to MENSA
I was a project manager in a male dominate workplace
I assemble furniture, electronics and troubleshoot all the repairable stuff here.
I read instructions.
I ask directions.

[Gayla]

~ I do not change my own oil.

~ I knit.

~ I'm not really fond of fire and do not grill, use the fireplace, make campfires.

~ My fun reading is mostly books found in the Romance section of your local bookstore.

~ I like chick flicks.

~ I've had a life long crush on Robert Redford because he looks so damn good in a cowboy hat.

~ I own women's shoes.

[FutureNOChef]

After reading most of the posts...I really don't think there is a sterotype here. We all are "outside the box". I as a "femme" do wear my jeans, t's & ballcaps because they are comfortable. However I do wear my lace bras & undies under because I love the feel & love being a woman. I admire, fantasize, drool over a striking Butch, but will also, but don't want to do her, give props to a good looking, well put together femme. I wear, proudly, my stilletos because I can & actually can walk, dance &...well nevermind, that's getting off the subject. We are who we are, we are comfortable in what we wear & do...That's all that matters. I don't think it should come down to "you are butch...go change the oil" or "your the femme...why aren't you in making dinner". All we can hope for is to be happy with ourselves & find someone who complements us, as we do them, in that way.

[The_Lady_Snow]

I hate shopping

I am the boss

I am not into pink

I don't likey any kind of shower gathering, baby showers, wedding showers, bridal showers

I hate dressing up

I hate romantic movies

I can change my oil but, why I can have someone else do it.

I prefer (combat) boots to heels

I have a cock

I love my cock

I love NASCAR, football, and soccer

I hate Lifetime TV

I like snakes

If something goes wrong, my mom calls me and I fix it

I am the family Enforcer on all sides

I suck at baking

I am Daddy

[scootebaby]

Originally Posted by BullDog

I don't like dolphin shaped dildos.

they make those??? holy hell....wonder if it could be displayed


yeah typical lesbian here..i LOVE dolphins--bradford exchange has made a fortune off of me. (didnt realize it was a lesbian thing tho to like dolphins)

i used to wear girl panties but couldnt find ones to fit just right...finally ran across body glove(men panties) cant even tell they are guys..and oooooooh so soft

i cant drive a truck--nor want one

i wore cowboy boots for about2 yrs in mid 90s...so not a boot fan of any kind

and my son tells me a lot if i do something outside the "norm"---"thats not very butch mom" lol

[Jett]

they make those??? holy hell....wonder if it could be displayed

ETA: Oops I was editing and lost my "displayable"! Here it is again, and really hope this lamp was used according to manufacturers recommendations! (or at least unplugged :l )

[Rook]

hmm...
You'd think when someone mentions Dolphin dildo, some outsider might say "aquatic bestiality?"
Up until 5 years ago, i was clueless about dolphin dildoes {heard of 'em, never seen}....
This thread enlightened me that as a lesbian, i'm supposed to love 'em..