~Butch is a Noun~

adorable · 06-17-2010, 07:29 PM

I just finished this book. It took me all of three hours. It's been a long time since a book has actually affected me in some sort of a profound way.

I don't have the words for it at the moment. Other than what a fucking book!!!

And btw for those who have not read the book butch is actually a noun, a verb, and an adjective...so to be clear this isn't a thread about butch being a noun.

It was given to me today at lunch by someone who considers butch to be their gender. Butch and Femme as gender has just confused the hell out of me. After reading this book I GET IT. I really do. Yay me!

The first time we met of course, it was the topic of conversation and I was using the words the way we use them here. Hy understands those words too since hy was raised here just like I was...but what hy said was, no it's different...and hy wanted me to read this book so I could understand how it's different. So I could understand hym. (you have to read that part fast for effect cuz I'm all kinds of excited.)

Has anyone else read it? There is so much in it. There is so much, IN HERE meaning BFP specifically and all the threads, in it...it's amazing to think of it as bigger then us. US meaning hym and I, and (the collective) you and me. Like, there are other people out there that are like us...(insert spaceship icon here and look up into the sky.)

I think because I am isolated here without a B-F community, that I tend to think of this as an online phenomenon. It exists in here. If I want to think about these things I come in here. If I want to talk about gender or IDs or dynamics or emphasis on differences - this is the place.

To have someone else now, right here, right now that says they get it and not only do they get it, they get ME because we both are these strange ducks in a heard of geese that have always lived in this bizarre queerfriendlybutnotreallyinclusiveexclusive city is beyond awesome. We just can't stop talking to each other. How freaking impossible is it to find another one - in the same situation, with the same questions, with the shared experiences of knowing we weren't like anyone else here? <--rhetorical.

Ok so the actual point of this thread would be to discuss this book if you've read it. Or if you have read another book that helped you get something about butch femme or gender or yourself - spill it. I sense a reading rampage about to happen for me.

This book inspired me to buy a pair of faux snakeskin 6 inch heels. I don't know what that means yet. But it's exciting to really get in a meaningful way all that butch is and isn't, unless it is or it's not. Because we know, except we don't, even though we all talk about it, unless we don't and then it is or it isn't.

Fucking.

Brilliant.

Gemme · 06-17-2010, 08:25 PM

Forget Oprah, you've sold me.

I haven't read it...yet. But I look forward to hearing what others have to say that did read it.

Toughy · 06-17-2010, 09:53 PM

I read it when it first came out several years ago. I've met Bear and been at a couple of readings he has done.

It's a great read, with some funny stories.

I am always amazed when folks are new to this idea of gender not being connected to biological sex. I've been having this conversation for at least 10 years.

Soon · 06-17-2010, 09:56 PM

Read it--liked it--affirmed some things about myself and others whom I have datred...it's awesome how some can put our experiences into words!

Strappie · 06-17-2010, 10:02 PM

I think I should read this book.. sounds interesting or confusing however you see it.. lol

Write14u · 06-18-2010, 12:52 AM

Adorable, good thread.
When a friend gave me this book, I remember having the "wow" moment that other people think the way I do. I enjoyed reading it, and I've read it several times.

Toughy · 06-18-2010, 12:55 AM

I would also highly recommend S/He by Minnie Bruce Pratt.

MsMerrick · 06-18-2010, 07:48 AM

Read it, back when it came out ..heard Bear read it .... Great presentation, if you get a chance ever.. don't miss a reading or performance by Bear : )

MsMerrick · 06-18-2010, 07:48 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Toughy

I would also highly recommend S/He by Minnie Bruce Pratt.

Oh yes, seriously yes .. Great book !

06-17-2010, 07:29 PM	#1
adorable Member How Do You Identify?: Sarcastically Preferred Pronoun?: She Relationship Status: Unavailable Join Date: Feb 2010 Location: Home of the Yankee's Posts: 752 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 1,708 Thanked 2,643 Times in 590 Posts Rep Power: 12725119	~Butch is a Noun~ I just finished this book. It took me all of three hours. It's been a long time since a book has actually affected me in some sort of a profound way. I don't have the words for it at the moment. Other than what a fucking book!!! And btw for those who have not read the book butch is actually a noun, a verb, and an adjective...so to be clear this isn't a thread about butch being a noun. It was given to me today at lunch by someone who considers butch to be their gender. Butch and Femme as gender has just confused the hell out of me. After reading this book I GET IT. I really do. Yay me! The first time we met of course, it was the topic of conversation and I was using the words the way we use them here. Hy understands those words too since hy was raised here just like I was...but what hy said was, no it's different...and hy wanted me to read this book so I could understand how it's different. So I could understand hym. (you have to read that part fast for effect cuz I'm all kinds of excited.) Has anyone else read it? There is so much in it. There is so much, IN HERE meaning BFP specifically and all the threads, in it...it's amazing to think of it as bigger then us. US meaning hym and I, and (the collective) you and me. Like, there are other people out there that are like us...(insert spaceship icon here and look up into the sky.) I think because I am isolated here without a B-F community, that I tend to think of this as an online phenomenon. It exists in here. If I want to think about these things I come in here. If I want to talk about gender or IDs or dynamics or emphasis on differences - this is the place. To have someone else now, right here, right now that says they get it and not only do they get it, they get ME because we both are these strange ducks in a heard of geese that have always lived in this bizarre queerfriendlybutnotreallyinclusiveexclusive city is beyond awesome. We just can't stop talking to each other. How freaking impossible is it to find another one - in the same situation, with the same questions, with the shared experiences of knowing we weren't like anyone else here? <--rhetorical. Ok so the actual point of this thread would be to discuss this book if you've read it. Or if you have read another book that helped you get something about butch femme or gender or yourself - spill it. I sense a reading rampage about to happen for me. This book inspired me to buy a pair of faux snakeskin 6 inch heels. I don't know what that means yet. But it's exciting to really get in a meaningful way all that butch is and isn't, unless it is or it's not. Because we know, except we don't, even though we all talk about it, unless we don't and then it is or it isn't. Fucking. Brilliant.

06-17-2010, 08:25 PM	#2
Gemme Practically Lives Here How Do You Identify?: Queer Stone Femme Girl of the Unicorn Variety Preferred Pronoun?: She, as in 'She's a GEM' Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: The roads are narrow here Posts: 36,631 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 182,498 Thanked 108,030 Times in 25,667 Posts Rep Power: 21474887	Forget Oprah, you've sold me. I haven't read it...yet. But I look forward to hearing what others have to say that did read it. __________________ Gemme's Journal I'm misunderestimated.

06-17-2010, 09:53 PM	#3
Toughy Senior Member How Do You Identify?: pervert butch feminist woman Preferred Pronoun?: see above Relationship Status: independent entity Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Oakland Posts: 1,826 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 4,068 Thanked 7,653 Times in 1,522 Posts Rep Power: 21474853	I read it when it first came out several years ago. I've met Bear and been at a couple of readings he has done. It's a great read, with some funny stories. I am always amazed when folks are new to this idea of gender not being connected to biological sex. I've been having this conversation for at least 10 years. __________________ We are everywhere We are different I do not care if resistance is futile I will not assimilate www.butchfemmesocials.com/

06-18-2010, 12:52 AM	#6
Write14u Member How Do You Identify?: Butch Preferred Pronoun?: I'm easy Relationship Status: She's some kind of wonderful. Join Date: Dec 2009 Location: I keep my heart and soul in the boondocks Posts: 626 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 240 Thanked 714 Times in 325 Posts Rep Power: 759422	Adorable, good thread. When a friend gave me this book, I remember having the "wow" moment that other people think the way I do. I enjoyed reading it, and I've read it several times. __________________ "I believe in the sweet spot, soft-core pornography, opening your presents Christmas morning rather than Christmas Eve and I believe in long, slow, deep, soft, wet kisses that last three days." -- Crash Davis, Bull Durham

06-18-2010, 12:55 AM	#7
Toughy Senior Member How Do You Identify?: pervert butch feminist woman Preferred Pronoun?: see above Relationship Status: independent entity Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Oakland Posts: 1,826 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 4,068 Thanked 7,653 Times in 1,522 Posts Rep Power: 21474853	I would also highly recommend S/He by Minnie Bruce Pratt. __________________ We are everywhere We are different I do not care if resistance is futile I will not assimilate www.butchfemmesocials.com/

06-17-2010, 09:56 PM	#4
Soon Infamous Member How Do You Identify?: femme Relationship Status: attached Join Date: Dec 2009 Location: . Posts: 6,896 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 29,046 Thanked 13,098 Times in 3,386 Posts Rep Power: 21474858	Read it--liked it--affirmed some things about myself and others whom I have datred...it's awesome how some can put our experiences into words!

06-17-2010, 10:02 PM	#5
Strappie Senior Member How Do You Identify?: Butch Preferred Pronoun?: I know who I am... Doesn't matter Relationship Status: It's a new day.... Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Mpls, MN Posts: 3,283 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 3,813 Thanked 4,946 Times in 1,350 Posts Rep Power: 21474855	I think I should read this book.. sounds interesting or confusing however you see it.. lol

06-18-2010, 07:48 AM	#8
MsMerrick Member How Do You Identify?: Queer Feminist Femme.... Preferred Pronoun?: She Relationship Status: Single and Singular.... Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: New York City.... Posts: 277 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 855 Thanked 645 Times in 166 Posts Rep Power: 4638166	Read it, back when it came out ..heard Bear read it .... Great presentation, if you get a chance ever.. don't miss a reading or performance by Bear : )