What Cracked You Up Today? - Page 6

Ms. Tabitha · 05-28-2010, 10:44 AM

Conversation over morning coffee .. there is never a dull moment!

Kätzchen · 05-28-2010, 12:39 PM

Not much has "cracked me up" today

but my day began just a bit ago, so there's no telling what I will find funny today or what will cause me to laugh or giggle!

Pretty Woman · 05-28-2010, 01:28 PM

Nothing! So far I've had a super stressful, client crazy-making, chaotic day. Maybe that will change.

GoofyLuvr · 05-29-2010, 04:45 PM

1) I saw a woman wearing a sweatshirt with "GUESS" on it. So I asked "Implants?". She hit me.

2) Marriage changes passion. Suddenly you're in bed with a relative.

3) How come we choose from just 2 people to run for President and over 50 for Miss America?

4) Now that food has replaced sex in my life I can't even get into my own pants.

5) I signed up for an exercise class and was told to wear loose fitting clothing. If I HAD any loose fitting clothing, I wouldn't have signed up for the class in the first place!

6) When I was young, we used to go skinny dipping. Now we just chunky dunk.

7) Don't argue with an idiot. People watching may not be able to tell the difference.

8) Wouldn't it be nice if, whenever we messed up in our lives, we could just hit "Control, Alt, Delete" and start all over again?

9) Wouldn't you know it.... brain cells come and brain cells go, but fat cells live forever.

Gemme · 05-29-2010, 04:59 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by GoofyLuvr

I received a check in the mail the other day. I had been expecting it, but it was much larger than I thought it would be. I was just about doing back flips, I was so excited! So, my friend and I went to try to get it cashed. After many tries, I found out the only way to get it cashed was with a hold placed on the funds. My good mood suddenly went south. I had PLANS for that money!!! My friend looked at me, and said "Now, I know all the red has been licked off your candy, but it will be ok."
I looked at her for a second, digesting what she had just said, then busted out laughing. How could I stay bummed after a comment like that?

After all, we ALL know red is the best flavor!

Blade · 05-31-2010, 11:00 AM

2 days ago I put a little box in the cage with a small towel in it for Itty Bitty to sleep in. He shit in it and slept on the floor of the cage. So I took it out and put litter in it.

Today I put a box of litter in the cage with Grumpy and he is shitting in the floor of the cage and sleeping in the litter.
ROFLMSAO!!!

MrSunshine · 06-02-2010, 03:14 PM

Random · 06-12-2010, 03:40 PM

A conversation..

Mitmo: What cha doing?

Me: Preaching my normal spill in a thread..

Mitmo: What thread?

Me:

hahahahahahahahahah Let me go look...

Shoot.. I was totally off thread topic..

So what's new?

Soon · 06-13-2010, 06:16 PM

(on the right)

UofMfan · 06-13-2010, 06:18 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by HowSoonIsNow

(on the right)

Ha! too funny!

waxnrope · 06-13-2010, 06:21 PM

just loooove the turquoise belt!

Kenna · 06-18-2010, 04:53 AM

Doggy Bubble Baths at 6:15am...with two silly muttlies who gladly rolled over in the tub to have their bellies scrubbed and rinsed. As if to say "ya missed a spot, Mom!"

Mitmo01 · 06-18-2010, 05:43 AM

The fact that i dont need an alarm clock when i have 4 felines busting into our room to wake me up right on time to feed them...who knew that kitties work better than the alarm clock lol

Mitmo01 · 06-18-2010, 06:03 AM

I forgot to add one of my coworkers had the funniest t-shirt on yesterday....it said " I have a blackbelt in crazy" lmfao and there was a 70's karate dude on it and it was the funniest shirt ive seen in a long time lololol

Soon · 06-22-2010, 12:12 PM

Scota_Parisi · 06-22-2010, 04:09 PM

This has been cracking me up for a few days..... amazing kid!! Makes all of us Rock Band geeks look like amateurs, that is for sure!

Blade · 06-23-2010, 04:27 PM

An email from a friend, oh my goodness I'm still chuckling....

Scorp · 06-28-2010, 08:39 PM

Toofrufru · 06-29-2010, 09:10 AM

I was due for an appointment with the gynecologist
later in the week.
Early one morning, I received a call from the doctor's
office to tell me that I had been rescheduled for that morning at 9:30 am. I
had only just packed everyone off to work and school, and it was already
around 8:45 AM...
The trip to his office took about 35 minutes, so I didn't have any time
to spare. As most women do, I like to take a little
extra effort over hygiene when making such visits, but this time I
wasn't going to be able to make the full effort.

So, I rushed upstairs, threw off my pajamas, wet the
washcloth that was sitting next to the sink, and gave myself a quick wash
in that area to make sure I was at least presentable. I threw
the washcloth in the clothes basket, donned some clothes, hopped in the car and raced to my appointment.

I was in the waiting room for only a few minutes when I was called in.
Knowing the procedure, as I'm sure you do, I undressed, hopped up on the
table, looked over at the other side of the room and pretended that I
was in Paris or some other place a million miles away.

I was a little surprised when the doctor said, 'My, we have made an
extra effort this morning, haven't we?'I didn't respond. After the appointment, I heaved a sigh of relief and went home. The rest of the day was normal - some shopping, cleaning, cooking.

After school when my 6 year old daughter was playing, she called out
from the bathroom, 'Mommy, where's my washcloth?' I told her to get another one from the cupboard.

She replied, 'No, I need the one that was here by the sink, it had all my glitter and sparkles saved inside it.'

Never going back to that doctor. Ever.

Soon · 07-01-2010, 03:24 PM

...."He's so deep in the closet he's finding Christmas presents."

05-28-2010, 01:28 PM	#103
Pretty Woman Junior Member How Do You Identify?: Femme Preferred Pronoun?: She Relationship Status: Trying to be true to myself Join Date: May 2010 Location: New York Posts: 73 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 45 Thanked 171 Times in 56 Posts Rep Power: 17333	Nothing! So far I've had a super stressful, client crazy-making, chaotic day. Maybe that will change. __________________ She packed up her potential and all she had learned, grabbed a cute pair of shoes and headed out to change a few things

05-29-2010, 04:45 PM	#104
GoofyLuvr Member How Do You Identify?: queer femme :) Preferred Pronoun?: Well golly gee whiz, I bet she would do it! Relationship Status: completely, totally, head over heels in love :) Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Maine!!! Posts: 122 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 139 Thanked 162 Times in 53 Posts Rep Power: 163	I received an email today, made me laugh, thought I'd share. It's titled "Life Thoughts By Ducky" 1) I saw a woman wearing a sweatshirt with "GUESS" on it. So I asked "Implants?". She hit me. 2) Marriage changes passion. Suddenly you're in bed with a relative. 3) How come we choose from just 2 people to run for President and over 50 for Miss America? 4) Now that food has replaced sex in my life I can't even get into my own pants. 5) I signed up for an exercise class and was told to wear loose fitting clothing. If I HAD any loose fitting clothing, I wouldn't have signed up for the class in the first place! 6) When I was young, we used to go skinny dipping. Now we just chunky dunk. 7) Don't argue with an idiot. People watching may not be able to tell the difference. 8) Wouldn't it be nice if, whenever we messed up in our lives, we could just hit "Control, Alt, Delete" and start all over again? 9) Wouldn't you know it.... brain cells come and brain cells go, but fat cells live forever.

06-02-2010, 03:14 PM	#107
MrSunshine Senior Member How Do You Identify?: The Gardner Preferred Pronoun?: Ummmm Relationship Status: Nah Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Sunshine State, State of Sunshine Posts: 2,616 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 1,577 Thanked 3,891 Times in 1,155 Posts Rep Power: 21474855	I can't stop watching this.

06-12-2010, 03:40 PM	#108
Random Senior Member How Do You Identify?: femme Relationship Status: Married Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: back in the land of trees and snow Posts: 2,072 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 8,017 Thanked 5,327 Times in 1,378 Posts Rep Power: 21474855	A conversation.. Mitmo: What cha doing? Me: Preaching my normal spill in a thread.. Mitmo: What thread? Me: hahahahahahahahahah Let me go look... Shoot.. I was totally off thread topic.. So what's new? __________________ ~Volunteer~ "It gets in your blood"

06-13-2010, 06:16 PM	#109
Soon Infamous Member How Do You Identify?: femme Relationship Status: attached Join Date: Dec 2009 Location: . Posts: 6,896 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 29,046 Thanked 13,094 Times in 3,386 Posts Rep Power: 21474858	confirmed heterosexual anti gay voting GOP Congressman Schock at the Whitehouse Picnic (on the right) Last edited by Soon; 06-13-2010 at 06:21 PM. Reason: spelled his name wrong

05-28-2010, 10:44 AM	#101
Ms. Tabitha Member How Do You Identify?: Hey Lady Preferred Pronoun?: Female Relationship Status: Married ~ 4-1-13 Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Central Texas Posts: 1,440 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 980 Thanked 3,581 Times in 1,040 Posts Rep Power: 21474853	Conversation over morning coffee .. there is never a dull moment!

05-28-2010, 12:39 PM	#102
Kätzchen Member How Do You Identify?: As a very feminine woman. Join Date: May 2010 Location: Near smoke signals in the sky. Posts: 16,209 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 29,450 Thanked 33,610 Times in 10,707 Posts Rep Power: 21474868	Not much has "cracked me up" today but my day began just a bit ago, so there's no telling what I will find funny today or what will cause me to laugh or giggle!

05-31-2010, 11:00 AM	#106
Blade Infamous Member How Do You Identify?: TG Preferred Pronoun?: He Relationship Status: once in a while someone amazing comes along...and here I am! Join Date: Jan 2010 Location: Down on the farm Posts: 5,501 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 9,855 Thanked 14,412 Times in 4,058 Posts Rep Power: 21474857	2 days ago I put a little box in the cage with a small towel in it for Itty Bitty to sleep in. He shit in it and slept on the floor of the cage. So I took it out and put litter in it. Today I put a box of litter in the cage with Grumpy and he is shitting in the floor of the cage and sleeping in the litter. ROFLMSAO!!!

06-13-2010, 06:21 PM	#111
waxnrope Timed Out How Do You Identify?: Permanently Banned 5/27/2011 Preferred Pronoun?: hy ho, hy ho; he, she, it, whatever Relationship Status: Going slow ... Join Date: Apr 2010 Location: in her orifices ... la frontera Posts: 1,433 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 6,414 Thanked 2,957 Times in 952 Posts Rep Power: 0	just loooove the turquoise belt!

06-18-2010, 04:53 AM	#112
Kenna Senior Member How Do You Identify?: Fiery, Sassy, Tough As Nails, Femme Tomboy Preferred Pronoun?: She Relationship Status: I am your favorite hello and hardest goodbye. Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: NC & CO Posts: 4,806 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 4,624 Thanked 12,191 Times in 3,779 Posts Rep Power: 21474856	Doggy Bubble Baths at 6:15am...with two silly muttlies who gladly rolled over in the tub to have their bellies scrubbed and rinsed. As if to say "ya missed a spot, Mom!" __________________ **************************** She has been through hell, so believe me when I say, fear her when she looks into a fire and smiles. ~E.Corona~

06-18-2010, 05:43 AM	#113
Mitmo01 Member How Do You Identify?: Disobedient Thing... Preferred Pronoun?: Rebel Soul in the blood..Heathen as well Relationship Status: Marked and Loved....I Belong to Her.... Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Omaha Posts: 984 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 1,523 Thanked 1,354 Times in 579 Posts Rep Power: 927729	The fact that i dont need an alarm clock when i have 4 felines busting into our room to wake me up right on time to feed them...who knew that kitties work better than the alarm clock lol

06-18-2010, 06:03 AM	#114
Mitmo01 Member How Do You Identify?: Disobedient Thing... Preferred Pronoun?: Rebel Soul in the blood..Heathen as well Relationship Status: Marked and Loved....I Belong to Her.... Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Omaha Posts: 984 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 1,523 Thanked 1,354 Times in 579 Posts Rep Power: 927729	I forgot to add one of my coworkers had the funniest t-shirt on yesterday....it said " I have a blackbelt in crazy" lmfao and there was a 70's karate dude on it and it was the funniest shirt ive seen in a long time lololol

06-22-2010, 12:12 PM	#115
Soon Infamous Member How Do You Identify?: femme Relationship Status: attached Join Date: Dec 2009 Location: . Posts: 6,896 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 29,046 Thanked 13,094 Times in 3,386 Posts Rep Power: 21474858	I'm So Much Cooler Online

06-22-2010, 04:09 PM	#116
Scota_Parisi Member How Do You Identify?: Femme Preferred Pronoun?: Mz. Relationship Status: Houston, we have landed. Join Date: Jun 2010 Location: Dathomir Posts: 263 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 624 Thanked 488 Times in 169 Posts Rep Power: 1289935	This has been cracking me up for a few days..... amazing kid!! Makes all of us Rock Band geeks look like amateurs, that is for sure! __________________ “I will love the light for it shows me the way, yet I will endure the darkness because it shows me the stars.” "It is only when we truly know and understand that we have a limited time on Earth and that we have no way of knowing when our time is up that we will begin to live each day to the fullest, as if it were the only one we had." ---Elisabeth Kubler-Ross

06-23-2010, 04:27 PM	#117
Blade Infamous Member How Do You Identify?: TG Preferred Pronoun?: He Relationship Status: once in a while someone amazing comes along...and here I am! Join Date: Jan 2010 Location: Down on the farm Posts: 5,501 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 9,855 Thanked 14,412 Times in 4,058 Posts Rep Power: 21474857	An email from a friend, oh my goodness I'm still chuckling....

06-28-2010, 08:39 PM	#118
Scorp Italian Stallion How Do You Identify?: DNA Usually... Join Date: Oct 2009 Location: In a van, down by the river.. Posts: 2,702 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 1,557 Thanked 4,714 Times in 1,263 Posts Rep Power: 21474855	Next Time Your Door Bell Rings...

06-29-2010, 09:10 AM	#119
Toofrufru Member How Do You Identify?: femme Preferred Pronoun?: Ms as in Ms Fru to you Relationship Status: Not the Marrying kind! Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Sunny Florida Posts: 172 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 95 Thanked 173 Times in 77 Posts Rep Power: 337	Rerun I was due for an appointment with the gynecologist later in the week. Early one morning, I received a call from the doctor's office to tell me that I had been rescheduled for that morning at 9:30 am. I had only just packed everyone off to work and school, and it was already around 8:45 AM... The trip to his office took about 35 minutes, so I didn't have any time to spare. As most women do, I like to take a little extra effort over hygiene when making such visits, but this time I wasn't going to be able to make the full effort. So, I rushed upstairs, threw off my pajamas, wet the washcloth that was sitting next to the sink, and gave myself a quick wash in that area to make sure I was at least presentable. I threw the washcloth in the clothes basket, donned some clothes, hopped in the car and raced to my appointment. I was in the waiting room for only a few minutes when I was called in. Knowing the procedure, as I'm sure you do, I undressed, hopped up on the table, looked over at the other side of the room and pretended that I was in Paris or some other place a million miles away. I was a little surprised when the doctor said, 'My, we have made an extra effort this morning, haven't we?'I didn't respond. After the appointment, I heaved a sigh of relief and went home. The rest of the day was normal - some shopping, cleaning, cooking. After school when my 6 year old daughter was playing, she called out from the bathroom, 'Mommy, where's my washcloth?' I told her to get another one from the cupboard. She replied, 'No, I need the one that was here by the sink, it had all my glitter and sparkles saved inside it.' Never going back to that doctor. Ever.

07-01-2010, 03:24 PM	#120
Soon Infamous Member How Do You Identify?: femme Relationship Status: attached Join Date: Dec 2009 Location: . Posts: 6,896 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 29,046 Thanked 13,094 Times in 3,386 Posts Rep Power: 21474858	This Line: ...."He's so deep in the closet he's finding Christmas presents."