Auntie Diva's Story Time

[Diva]

Good evening, boys and girls, and gather 'round for another story from your Auntie Diva.......

Well, boys and girls, today was a very special day....yes.....today was the 18th birthday of the daughter of your cousin ShariBlueberry!!! It's true!

So I was invited to participate in the birthday extravaganza.....and I got in the MomMobile to drive to the north country and The Cheesecake Factory! Yum, boys and girls, YUM! It true! Little tiny elves work in the back ~ just like the North Pole! ~ and build delicious cheesecakes for all the lucky ones who grace their tables and are willing to pay $9.95 or the donation of one's youngest child.....something like that.

Of course, it was raining cats and dogs as I drove northward, and for a majority of the drive, I was going 2 mph. It's true. There was no accident that I ever saw. Your Auntie Diva was pretty sure it was National Granny~On~The~Highway Day here in The Austin Town.

But I eventually got there.....your cousin ShariBlueberry had passed out in the bread basket in a yeast coma, and little cousin Ambrosia was climbing over the seats, going from booth to booth.

But I digress.

We had a lovely meal, even if the waiters did switch off.....we ended our meal with Ricardo ~ who allowed me to slide his tip into his pocket...but that's another thread, boys and girls. I just said, "Get out the crackers" as he was quite the handsome Latino young man.

Digression #2.

So....as we were enjoying our cheesecakes, I commented to your cousin Ambrosia that she was an Aquarian.......and, as a matter of fact.....SO WAS AUNTIE DIVA'S EX~HUSBAND......

And I asked her, "So you know what THAT says, right"?

And without missing a beat, your cousin Ambrosia replied, "That I'm a bastard?"



Your Auntie Diva didn't realize cousin Ambrosia had met her ex~husband.


Signed,
Auntie Diva, who is more than pleased to have an EX~husband