Big Butch Love

[Shystonefem]

Originally Posted by randrum

This is a great thread. To read everyone's, both butch and femme alike, responses is enlightening.

I've never thought of myself as big until the last couple of years. Technically speaking, based on BMI and height-weight charts, I have always been overweight. Even in peak physical condition in high school and college (I was a swimmer).

I have naturally big shoulders, that are a source of pride really. I like how they look. And I have always been muscular. But over the last few years I've developed a gut. It's a sore spot for me.

I workout regularly. Lift weights, run, yoga, etc. I try to eat right, though I'm a sucker for pizza, burgers, and beer. Lol.

Life would be easier if I just accepted that I have the gut. If I was just happy with the body I'm in, because really there is nothing wrong with it. But even if I accepted it, it doesn't mean other people would.

My dad always comments about my size. My mom tells me every time she sees me that I need to "lose the gut". Or will give me a look when I'm eating something she doesn't approve of.

So that leads me to a bad place. If my parents can't accept my size, how am I going to find a woman to love me in spite of it? Honestly, it's why I haven't even put myself out there to find a gf. I figured I didn't stand a chance.

I never have seen it that way. People tell me that I am small but I don't feel that way. I actually don't like being called small.....

My mother told me, every single day, how fat I was (at the time, I was a size 7).... She was thin (a size 3). What I am trying to say is that what one person appears to see is not what the rest of the world sees.

So what if you have a beer belly? You are still the same person.... just sayin.