What do YOU need to feel loved?

[Kätzchen]

Originally Posted by adorable

I have been thinking about this for the last few days. Sometimes I think, we think we know - but do we really? Can we actually say or explain our needs to another person?

What makes YOU feel secure and loved?

Is it a way that someone talks to you? That they pay attention to how you feel and are in tune with your emotions? Do they make you feel interesting and special? Is it being able to say nothing and just "be" with that person?

Or is it in gestures? Flowers, breakfast in bed? Notes on the pillow?

Is it routine? Coming home every Friday and knowing that Friday is always pizza night? Making the bed together every morning? Sunday is cleaning day?

What do you need to feel loved the way that you need to be loved?

I think the number one thing that adds to my feelings of safety and security in a loving relationship is when the other person makes time for me and gives me their undivided attention.

For example, they hear me: they listen to me actively and when they respond to me (in the way that they do), it makes me feel loved. Or said differently??? When they care about what bothers me, hurts me or causes me pain or brings me joy or any number of things and they offer comfort to me - in whatever form of natural expression that comes from a heart centered place of genuine care and concern for me??? It's the number one way that I am able to recognise that they truly love me. I need that the most; it's like oxygen to me - knowing that they care about me: This is what causes me to feel secure and loved.