Stone--Personal Definitions

[Toughy]

I'm a BDSM masochist and a sexual bottom. Both my late partner and my late gf were big, bad- ass butch tops. That top/bottom dynamic can foster a stone sexual relationship even with couples who don't ID as stone. You know- aggressor/receiver, pitcher/catcher, dominant/submissive. That's how my late partner and I managed to have sizzling, screaming, mind-blowing sex even though we had unresolved issues around reciprocity. We both chalked it up to our sexual D/s dynamic.

I wanted to piggyback on this idea.....

I am not sexually stone, except when I am.

When I am in Top kink space, I am about as sexually stone as you could possibly be. I am totally cock-identified and my clit is not a cock ever. I don't have a clit or breasts.

Outside of Top kink space, it is about the energy between the femme in my (her) bed and me. It's very fluid (from stone to all access) and very satisfying.

I also want to point out there are Femmes who are sexually stone.......meaning they don't want penetration or breasts played with or clit sucked. They get their pleasure from fucking/making love to the butch in their bed.

I also think everyone has sexual boundaries that must be respected. Sexual boundaries is not a phenomenon of Stone id.

[TenderKnight]

Originally Posted by Toughy

I also think everyone has sexual boundaries that must be respected. Sexual boundaries is not a phenomenon of Stone id.

THANK TOU for this post.. I do not ID as stone, although I thought that maybe I was for a while. I do have sexual bounderies, however.. Sometimes I get very frustrated in bed, if I am not strapped. My cock is part of my sexual identity..

I have certain ways I want to be touched, there are also some things that I just don't like to do *to* a partner, because to *me*, it puts me into "lesbian" head space.. I still have memories of being a lesbian, I had a 4 year lesbian relationship.. It is a bad mindfuck for me, because then I feel femininized. I have had partners that don't get it, just as I've had partners that totally get it and enjoy the energy there.

It all comes down to mutual respecting of personal head space and bounderies for me. If a sexual partner asks me not to do something, I don't do it. It doesn't make them any less of a femme, butch, tranguy, cisguy, transwoman, or what ever they ID as.. The point is to connect with my partner and to have a good time.

There are somethings I really *need* to do with a partner I am in a relationship with.. One of those is strapping on one of my cocks and makeing love or fucking with it. If it's a hook up, it's diffrent for me.. The point there is to get off. In a relationship, the point is to share in the experience and maybe eventually, we get to get off too

I hope that my contribution helps add to the convo here.. As I said, I am not stone, but I *get* where being stone comes from and what it's about.

Thank you to all that have posted, I have been enjoying the read

-Tony

[Soon]

Some really wonderful sharing of people's personal definitions of Stone.

Thank you to all who have participated (or will!).

[cuddlyfemme]

This is an awesome thread with wonderful thoughts, comments. Like others, I thought I was a "Femme" for not wanting to give....I used the term "pillow princess" for awhile then realized that since I was much more comfortable with Stone Butches that I was (am) a Stone Femme. Like others, I encountered relationships where after I explained what a Stone Femme was, I was told that wasn't an issue....after awhile it did become an issue. I'm not sure if I would be more willing to give if I was in a D/s relationship since I've never been in one although I probably would be more giving

[DapperButch]

Originally Posted by cuddlyfemme

This is an awesome thread with wonderful thoughts, comments. Like others, I thought I was a "Femme" for not wanting to give....I used the term "pillow princess" for awhile then realized that since I was much more comfortable with Stone Butches that I was (am) a Stone Femme. Like others, I encountered relationships where after I explained what a Stone Femme was, I was told that wasn't an issue....after awhile it did become an issue. I'm not sure if I would be more willing to give if I was in a D/s relationship since I've never been in one although I probably would be more giving

Remember, only do what is comfortable for you. There is nothing wrong with being Stone in any relationship, if that is who you are. Being true to yourself will result in you finding the right partner match.

[Starbuck]

I have read the entire thread and I can tell you all that I have learned a lot! I really appreciate the frankness and honesty with which each member has chosen to speak about their experience with this topic.

[BullDog]

I am a stone butch and lesbian and my butch cock is a female body part.

[cuddlyfemme]

Originally Posted by DapperButch

Remember, only do what is comfortable for you. There is nothing wrong with being Stone in any relationship, if that is who you are. Being true to yourself will result in you finding the right partner match.

You're so right...one has to be true to themself before anything. Thanks for the reminder. I'm very proud of being Stone