The MirriFemme-Webutchster New BFP Dictionary

[tuffboi29]

So donating money to the dictionary cause may or may not keep me from being described in it?What if I bribed the arthor with chocolate and a bottle of finely aged red wine?



*slips the arthor with a bar o' *

*whispers* We can keep this between us...I won't tell if you won't.

[Arwen]

Originally Posted by tuffboi29

So donating money to the dictionary cause may or may not keep me from being described in it?What if I bribed the arthor with chocolate and a bottle of finely aged red wine?



*slips the arthor

Originally Posted by tuffboi29

with a bar o' *

*whispers* We can keep this between us...I won't tell if you won't.

Dear Briber,

While the staff here as the MirriFemme-Webutchster New BFP Dictionary does appreciate the gifts, we must maintain our stance that all are subject to being lampooned.

Hopefully, when one does find oneself in a definition, one will be in the plus category rather than the minus.

As they say, Defined is as Defined does...

Cordially Yours,

The Staff of the MirriFemme-Webutchster New BFP Dictionary

[Arwen]

Whatzhyzname/Whatzhername Medical Condition (from the Amnesiac -- Non memorabliam)

This cry can be heard from individuals of the Butch persuasion as well as those individuals of the femme persuasion. Often found in a certain age category, this is the call of the terminally forgetful.

Frequently this hits certain individuals of the Butch persuasion in the Home Depot or at the ballpark while those individuals of the femme persuasion seem to suffer more often at the grocery store or the MAC counter.

A certain look steals across one's face when this affliction strikes. They are out and about. Someone walks up to them cheerfully calling them by name. They even ask them about their partner/cat/dog/bootblack.

There could be an aroma of smoke or even a small plume of white rising from the back of the cranial protection as the gears start spinning in a mad effort to recapture the name of the person in front of them.

A kind person, recognizing this problem, would immediately stick their hand out and say, "Hi! Do you remember me? I'm __________" thereby eliminating the grey matter overload occurring in front of them.

However, there is a sadistic variety of person who will stand there continuing to talk knowing that this person has no clue who they are.

The sadistic type will ask the sufferer about their partner by name. They will inquire after each pet and child also by name. They may even offer condolences for a co-worker's dead plant. With each comment, their infernal glee is fed by the look of "deer in the headlights" as the Whatzhyzname/Whatzhername sufferer goes deeper and deeper into the cobwebbed filled corners of their mind.

The staff at MirriFemme-Webutchster's New BFP Dictionary would like to encourage everyone to be kind to those older or more forgetful. Otherwise, karma is gonna suck when you get there.

[Arwen]

Unnecessarybumpitis, Medical term (from the Greek GottaPokeTheBearious)

This condition occurs mainly in those who feel ignored or slighted in some way. These sufferers are unique in that they like attention. One of the ways they seek this attention is to do what is known as bumping a thread.

Bumping A Thread is when one (either an individual of the butch persuasion or an individual of the femme persuasion) posts in a thread simply to bring it to the top of the front page and/or the attention of previous posters.

It is thought that those who like to bump threads also like to poke people who are meditating or napping. Some field researchers say those who suffer from Unnecessarybumpitis also have been seen to sneak up behind sleeping felines and yell "BOO."

No known cure at this time but some efficacy has been noted by gently playing along with these unfortunate enough to suffer from chronic Unnecessarybumpitis.

No examples are necessary at this time.

[tuffboi29]

Whereas I now realize I can't possibly bribe the staff...I would like to post a request for the finished product of the Dictionary.
I have waited unpatientiently long enough.

Thank you,
The Briber