Open Letter: Dear Femme

[Passionaria]

WOW, I so appreciate this.

Sisters VS competitors

In the Pollyanna of my heart, where the world resides in a flow of goodness I deeply desire to see women, femmes as my sisters. In this place we have ethical boundaries, kind intentions, create a support system where we take joy in watching each other blossom into the most beautiful flowers we can be. A place where our hearts are safe, and trust is an abundant commodity. I have met a few femmes who I can honestly share this space, and I love them for this.

I am somewhat new to this community, and I have to say I have been shocked by some of the things I have witnessed in the name of getting the butch. I don't know why, because straight women do it all the time. I guess I had hoped that a group of women with no men involved would just "do better". Were women after all why can't we figure it out?????

I think the story may be, we're humans and being loved is a basic human need. We all want it but are conditioned to believe we don't automatically deserve it, just because we were born, which I think is the truth. We are taught to compete and fight for it, be pretty enough, sexy enough, Susie homemaker enough, just the right blend of innocent and naughty, and if we're the best f*** ever, we will surely be loved. So I agree this is a tall order to fill, and it's exhausting to be worthy of love. How can we not be afraid, afraid of not being worthy. It's like the golden carrot or something I'll try harder, just love me. I think that is where the competition come from.

I think it is important to note, that we did not create these conditions, we were born into them. So, do we owe allegiance to these false pretenses? What purpose does keeping women in competition serve on a sociological level? Control of women??????

Maybe the real power is in loving our selves so completely that we believe we deserve to be loved, just because we exist. Then what is there to compete about?

Passionaria