Mental Illness

[chefhottie25]

Originally Posted by lipstixgal

I have a question does anybody struggle with weight issues?? I take geodon and a sleeping pill and can't lose any weight and I'm on 1200 calories a day, joined a gym so trying to work out and exercise, Any suggestions??

i also take geodon..and it works wonderfully. however i have had a significant weight gain. like 60 to 70 pounds. i am trying to not let it get me down, i really enjoy being stable so the weight is a small price to pay.

[lilapache]

checking in... started new meds... abilify.... hoping it helps... more meds to be added i guess... moving again... really bad situation developed when i moved here to indiana but i'm glad that i found out after 11 years... so now i'm moving in with other friends and they have found me a place about 3 doors down from them so... *sighs*... i guess its good in a way... bad in others... but i'm staying positive and working my ass off... got a job and been working as much overtime as possible... hey at least i know how to use my manics... hope all is well with ya'll...

will check back in soon...

[Jedi]

Originally Posted by lilapache

checking in... started new meds... abilify.... hoping it helps... more meds to be added i guess... moving again... really bad situation developed when i moved here to indiana but i'm glad that i found out after 11 years... so now i'm moving in with other friends and they have found me a place about 3 doors down from them so... *sighs*... i guess its good in a way... bad in others... but i'm staying positive and working my ass off... got a job and been working as much overtime as possible... hey at least i know how to use my manics... hope all is well with ya'll...

will check back in soon...

Good to see you Apache

[sylvie]

not sure if i fit into this thread but i feel like maybe i do..

this morning, i've decided i finally need to live by the saying in my signature..although i always want to, don't feel i ever do.

i suffer from very low self esteem, firstly.. it's always been a big battle of mine. over the years, i got myself into a rut, and found it hard to climb out.. although, i know i've taken a few steps out, i know i've still a long way to go.

i have an eating disorder, as well.. which is a constant battle of mine, though i feel ive taken some positive steps over the years ...(binge & purge), so i need to work on a healthier me, continue to lose some weight and feel good about myself, and not go back to that inner me that wants to abuse my system and hurt me so no one can see.

i think my main concern, is my having pushed people away through the years when i was in my rut (thats what i call it).. ive come out of my shell some, but i need to more.. i really miss a lot of my friends, i was just in such a bad place at the time.. i have reached out to some family i had pushed away. which felt amazing.. small steps, i guess..

these are all things i feel i need to work on.. i dont feel sad, im generally a happy person but, i do have a lot of sadness deep on the inside that i think kind of takes over at times.. ive never really dealt with issues in my past, i've been very much a suffer it on the insides kind of girl. and some things from my childhood and teen years are extremely painful, therefore i just don't talk about them.

anyway, in saying all this.. i very much seek peace within myself.. forgiveness for myself, and some forgiveness with others.. i want to build my esteem back up, i want to get myself to this positive, happy place and i know there's steps i need to move forward and get myself there..

so, starting now, i work on this.. ♥

[Jedi]

Originally Posted by sylvie

not sure if i fit into this thread but i feel like maybe i do..

this morning, i've decided i finally need to live by the saying in my signature..although i always want to, don't feel i ever do.

i suffer from very low self esteem, firstly.. it's always been a big battle of mine. over the years, i got myself into a rut, and found it hard to climb out.. although, i know i've taken a few steps out, i know i've still a long way to go.

i have an eating disorder, as well.. which is a constant battle of mine, though i feel ive taken some positive steps over the years ...(binge & purge), so i need to work on a healthier me, continue to lose some weight and feel good about myself, and not go back to that inner me that wants to abuse my system and hurt me so no one can see.

i think my main concern, is my having pushed people away through the years when i was in my rut (thats what i call it).. ive come out of my shell some, but i need to more.. i really miss a lot of my friends, i was just in such a bad place at the time.. i have reached out to some family i had pushed away. which felt amazing.. small steps, i guess..

these are all things i feel i need to work on.. i dont feel sad, im generally a happy person but, i do have a lot of sadness deep on the inside that i think kind of takes over at times.. ive never really dealt with issues in my past, i've been very much a suffer it on the insides kind of girl. and some things from my childhood and teen years are extremely painful, therefore i just don't talk about them.

anyway, in saying all this.. i very much seek peace within myself.. forgiveness for myself, and some forgiveness with others.. i want to build my esteem back up, i want to get myself to this positive, happy place and i know there's steps i need to move forward and get myself there..

so, starting now, i work on this.. ♥

I think you fit right in with us. Please come back and share more with us.

[Jedi]

Prozac is one of the drugs I am on. It has been steadily increased lately and I have been noticing that with these increases my strange dreams are becoming more vivid and more apparent. Does anyone else on Prozac experience these crazy dreams? It's not like the dreams are scary or anything like that........just strange and vivid.

[lipstixgal]

Originally Posted by chefhottie25

i also take geodon..and it works wonderfully. however i have had a significant weight gain. like 60 to 70 pounds. i am trying to not let it get me down, i really enjoy being stable so the weight is a small price to pay.

My bipolar disorder is not that bad and I need to lose weight I'll stop taking it!! I crave everything especially at night lol just did a Jenny Craig dance tape and I was out of breath and even joined a gym!! I'll try tonight to just take my lunesta and clonzapam no geodon for a while. Although the doctor says that it shouldn't be the geodon that causes weight gain, that particular drug is not suppose to cause weight gain!! I don't know. I'm getting depressed about the weight gain..goint to google that drug and see what comes up!!

[JinxdGirl]

Just a quick note and I'll come back another time.

Diagnosis [plural]:
PTSD
Borderline Personality
Bi-Polar Rapid Cycling NOS
Atypical Depression
Anxiety NOS
PMDD

Meds:
Lamictal 200 mg - daily
Effexor XR: 250 mg - daily
Xanax: 1 mg - prn

Therapy:
Weekly w/ Ol' Glass Ass

I am a hot mess it seems. Oh well. More to come, I'm certain.

[Jedi]

Originally Posted by JinxdGirl

Just a quick note and I'll come back another time.

Diagnosis [plural]:
PTSD
Borderline Personality
Bi-Polar Rapid Cycling NOS
Atypical Depression
Anxiety NOS
PMDD

Meds:
Lamictal 200 mg - daily
Effexor XR: 250 mg - daily
Xanax: 1 mg - prn

Therapy:
Weekly w/ Ol' Glass Ass

I am a hot mess it seems. Oh well. More to come, I'm certain.

Thanks for joining us and please post more soon.

[chefhottie25]

just checking in...hope everyone is well. I have been working a lot, which used to be a stressor and trigger symptoms. I happy to report that i am handling the stress well...no episodes. saw my doctor last week. she changed my sleeping pill to elavil. The ambien would have me waking up and eating in the middle of the night and not remembering it the next morning. the new med seems to be working. i have been sleeping well and not feeling lethargic the next morning. that's all i have to report. all is well here.

[lipstixgal]

I am taking lunesta and was eating in the middle of the night but I knew it, that's weird why do those pills do that?? I take Geodon, and klonopin but the lunesta will be gone by Sunday so it will have to be Ambien!!

[JinxdGirl]

I am ..
a self injurer with 18 months of abstinence.
an abuse survivor.
not weak because of mental illness.

I come from a family riddled with mental illness, it's as much nature as lack of nurture in my case. I am well medicated and managing well, but this hasn't always been the case. I do not work. I am on SSD and SSI and have been for 8 years. I will have to remain on these benefits for the foreseeable future, in some capacity, for the insurance. Affording my medication and therapy would be impossible without the assistance of the government. I rarely tell anyone about my disability status unless they are an integral part of my everyday existence, because people can be horribly judgmental and/or use that information as ammunition when things don't go their way.

I have been in therapy/counseling off and on for 21 years. If you did the math, you will know that I started at the age of ten. I do not count my kindergarten year of spending an hour with the school psychologist every day, nor do I count the family therapy that was court ordered and my family attended only one session.

I have attempted suicide more times than I can count, starting around the age of eleven. I have been hospitalized 3 times, the first at the age of 13 and the last at age 24.

I was diagnosed with PMDD at 31. Diagnosed as Bi-Polar at the age of 21. Diagnosed with PTSD at 20. Diagnosed with atypical depression at 19. Diagnosed as Borderline at 15. Diagnosed with anxiety at 11.

I've been on so many different combinations of medicine I can't even remember them all. I do recall, however, my parents telling me that they would not pay for medicine for me because I just needed to stop seeking attention. After all, anything that could have ever been wrong with me was my own doing and had nothing at all to do with the lifetime of abuse and neglect that I was going through/coping with/barely surviving/survived. Please note the sarcasm in that last sentence.

In summation, I am mentally ill. Being judged and stigmatized because of that fact irritates me. I am mentally ill, however I am not the last 12 psychotic girlfriends you had. I shouldn't have to pay for whatever they may have done to you. Discounting anything about me because of my diagnosis is unfair, I am still capable of loving, feeling, parenting, caring, anger, disappointment and anything else so many seem to negate because I am "crazy". I did not wake up one day, when I was 10, and say "Hey! I think I'll be batshitcrazy for the rest of my life!". I control what I can control. I take my medication. I journal daily. I participate in therapy. I cannot wish this away. I've tried. I will not let it define me.

I am mentally ill. But, I am so much more than a laundry list of diagnosis. I am strong, loving, intelligent, witty, fun, friendly, flirty, femme. I am Jinx!

[chefhottie25]

just wanted to check in. hope everyone is doing well. i have been a little down since i broke my foot. i hate having my mobility restricted. i get to go back to work full time on thursday...i am sure that will cheer me up.

[naturlover_52]

back in the land of the living and the real world after a weeks stay in another mental place....but glad I went....and got the help to recover....and working on NOT relapsing AGAIN....and also taking things 1 day at a time...meds were changed again...and gonna see what this new one can do to help....abilify on top of the Effexor XR and the Trazadone.
living in the here and now and working ON moi....and getting healthy and happy.
trying for SSI again...hope 3rd time is the charm.

thanks all