Friends of Bill W.

[LeftWriteFemme]

August 8


Stand Hear


The spins and pirouettes I have preformed in an attempt to avoid facing the music, were impressive but futile and ultimately delayed the beauty possible for me in this life. When I stop my running and turn on my heel there is a world of harmony waiting to take me for a turn out on the dance floor. Melody is not what I was expecting. I was so sure I would be drummed out of my life, not trumpeted in. My surety set in motion much of my convoluted activity and caused me great distress. It is high time I listen with eyes open and my reactions leashed; allowing the tune to introduce me to life and lead me to my bliss.





Let bad habits run away from home; pack their bags when you can

*

DON’T BE

Don’t be stupid.
Don’t be crazy.
Don’t be anything out of the ordinary.

Don’t be angry.
Don’t be hateful.
Just don’t be that way.

Don’t be sad.
Don’t be mopy
Smile fore the camera and pretend for everyone.

I often wondered why I felt like dyeing
And it took me years to understand why,
Don’t be, equals = Death.

Don’t feel.
Don’t cry.
Don’t love
.
Life is about action, presence and content.
You’re wrong if you break the rules
And dead if you keep them.

So please don’t be Them.
Look back when you have to
But step out of the grave.

[LeftWriteFemme]

August 9



Pick up Your Hammer and Saw

The task infers the tool. I know this, yet I resist clearly mapping my insanity. I look into the well of my despair then quickly I look away, I fear informing G-d what I need lest the need be filled. I need to believe that a power will heal me, but if I am provided with the force of life, I shrink from the prospect. This too, must be added to the list of my emotional woes and mental shortages. This too, will be healed. I look at my problems and then realize, that like the moon, who pulls the water from dry shore to dry shore, solutions are installed in heaven and earth if I know what the problem is.





Experiment, start living a dream


*
COMFORT AND WILLINGNESS

Closer than comfort is willingness.
Comfort is at the skin
But willingness is under it.

I can live without comfort
But not without willingness
Both are unseen but felt deeply.

Willingness drives to the destination
And comfort settles me in once there.
Comfort is a gift like warmth,
Willingness is a gift like breath.

I have been tempted to let go of willingness
To hold onto comfort.
True willingness brings true comfort
Never the other way around.

No matter where I have to go
Willingness will take me there,
I hope comfort will follow.

[Soft*Silver]

Next Sunday, I am going to give my first lead since my relapse nov 13 2008.

How grateful I am...

[LeftWriteFemme]

Hey Friends of Bill, Jimmy, Lois and so on who are going to the Reunion,

I spoke to the GSR of the gay meeting in Little Rock and she explained to me that the only gay meetings are Friday and Sunday evenings. We had hoped that there were day time meetings that we could visit while in town, but alas this will not work out. So I purpose that folks PM me and let me know when they would like to meet. Tommi and I are morning people and 7:45 AM Friday morning has been suggested, but if there is a time that would be better please let me know.

Thanks very much,

Sherrie

[LeftWriteFemme]

August 10




Michal Rovner


I have numbered all the blocks in my ancestral walls. This has enabled me to recreate them stone by stone everywhere I go. It all fits to create the tomb I now have to learn to leave. I must change the equation and reorder the numbers allowing these rocks to be recycled and find a wonderful useful life as a stairway out of this pit of despair. What was once an edifice to lives unlived is now able to facilitate elevation, a restoration of a level playing field. It was not wrong for me to catalog the stones and there was no way for me to leave them behind, but nothing matches the satisfaction of using them to build a life, except for the ability to live in it.






Take a look at yourself from a distance


*
THE SEDUCTION OF SOBRIETY

I was seduced away from my duties
As an alcoholic by the promise of sobriety,
Allegiance to my disease was sidelined.

Alluring stability and beguiling integrity
Curried favor with my desperate heart,
Pulling me from the arranged marriage of addiction.

How could I cling to the corpse of dependence
When sanity shimmered just out of reach,
Then not out of reach but within my grasp.

I couldn’t resist the golden flicker of life.
I had been bound to death
Unable to see an alternative.

My loyalty to loss and grief slipped from me
And I limped into the daylight,
Like the widow of the night.

I have been lured to my senses
By a love like no other,
The love of life.

[Tommi]

Originally Posted by LeftWriteFemme

Hey Friends of Bill, Jimmy, Lois and so on who are going to the Reunion,

I spoke to the GSR of the gay meeting in Little Rock and she explained to me that the only gay meetings are Friday and Sunday evenings. We had hoped that there were day time meetings that we could visit while in town, but alas this will not work out. So I purpose that folks PM me and let me know when they would like to meet. Tommi and I are morning people and 7:45 AM Friday morning has been suggested, but if there is a time that would be better please let me know.

Thanks very much,

Sherrie

So, looks like we don't have many early risers in the crowd. Maybe some will want to just meet and do the infamous AA Coffee style meeting somewhere in the lobby/lounge, and chat. A meeting is were two or more gather, so, see ya'll in Little Rock..8 days away for U/s.

So Easy Does It, and get lots of rest and avoid screaming H.A.L.T. too loud. If the sights and sounds get overwhelming, grab one of us.

Tommi

[LeftWriteFemme]

August 11




Hoover’s Fault


When happiness is hard work I have to learn to look for the lie. There must be a lie for happiness flows unrestrained when not dammed. What was built too far up river for me to see, dries out my once liquid existence; leaving me to flounder in the shallows. I can’t allow myself to flop in the muck of waters muddied with deceit. I will permit myself to look for clear bright prospects from melting glaciers and accustom myself to the invigoration of a life lived under a loving watchful eye.






Keep water near by

*

KILLER SQUIRRELS
AND OTHER SOBER DRAMA

I can tell you stories to make your hair curl.
Death defying fifth steps,
Speaking commitments with microphoned podiums,
Sponsees with killer squirrels trapped in the house.

The courage and sheer determination
Needed to face plague, after crisis, after pestilence
And yet sober mind and willing heart these travails
Are surmounted and we live on.

Tears turn to laughter with rescue and remedy
How strong we feel as the cape is passed
When one time panic prone sponsees
Become the model of calm and stable sponsors.

Hoards of relatives at holidays,
Interaction with bankers, police officers
And all manner of people in shiny shoes
Are handled with grace and boundaries.

Porch loving skunks, children becoming teenagers,
Are faced with humor and wit.
Things which in years gone by would have sent us screaming
To the phone are now casual asides during after meeting discussion.

Life does keep spinning on
But we learn how to stand still.

[TenderKnight]

Hey all!

Just an FYI, San Diego's Feeling Good confrence is coming up. http://www.feelinggood.org

It's held during Labor Day weekend and is a huge confrence with a lot of GLBT focus. I'll be volunteering and if anyone else volunteers, there is a wave for the confrence fee. I believe that for every 4 hours of volunteer work you get the rest of the day free.

There are lots of things planned including speakers and work shops. I am looking forward to it! If anyone wants to come by and say hello or hang out, that would be pretty cool too.

Hope that everyone that is going to Little Rock has an AWESOME time and I hope that the AA meeting gets put together ok, I know that those kind of things kinda happen as they should anyway

On a personal note, I am considering going into a residentialprogram here in San Diego.. The more I pray about it and share about it the better it feels and I will take whatever the next indicated step is for me.. Now, it's heading to Point Loma for a TB test.. lol

Love and Light to everyone on this thread and around the rooms.

-Tony, who has 20 days as of today.. A fucking maricle.. lol