Stone Femme?

[*Anya*]

As always, I speak for myself & my own experiences:

For 10 years my Stone Butch would not allow me to perform oral sex on her. Fucking her or touching her breasts were out of the question. She did feel comfortable masturbating in front of/with me.

I guess during this time I could have been considered a stone femme but it was not my own true sexual identity. Oh god, here goes: I love to eat pussy & I missed it somewhat but there were other obvious benefits in my relationship.

During our 11th year, she was a little tipsy & somehow I wound up fucking her & she liked it but it was a very, very rare experience thereafter and she never wanted to discuss it. It just did not fit with her own sexual identity or self-image. That was OK with me.

Did I love doing it-yes I did! Maybe I have a smidgen of femme top in me but that does not feel comfortable for me at all in my own self-image. I am open to just about anything but am not overtly aggressive sexually. I feel very shy sexually really and have to feel totally comfortable and safe with my sexual partner in order to let myself go. That letting go is very, very hard for me. Stems from my puritanical, rigid upbringing I am sure.

How can I be open to anything on one hand but am never the one to "make the moves"? I have no idea, if you can figure that one out, I'd be glad to know.

I really do hope it is OK to be so honest. I have no idea why I am-scares me a little. The Internet is forever. I just have not found so many like-minded souls before & at least for now, it is bubbling out of me. I think I better put a cork in it.