The Loft: Butches and Femmes in their 40s, 50s and over.

[SweetJane]

Originally Posted by SaltyButch

Ahh nice to see so many "seasoned" ladies and gents....this thread is a great place to discuss what our generation faces....look forward to some enlightening discussion. Here's a question to start things off....Do you think we as "older" persons should be limited to a particular age range when dating?

Very good question, Salty.

I, for one, don't think that we should be limited--within reason, of course. This is especially true for older femmes. Here in the B-F community, we often are subjected to traditional het social rules; ie femmes only date older butches. For some of us, that's just fine. For others, that's very uncomfortable on many levels.

Let me explain. When you are dipping into your sunset years, the number of available older butches is quite limited. That means your dating pool is smaller than a thimble. That can make some of us resign ourselves to an easy chair and watch life pass us by.

For myself, in general I prefer the energy of younger people, butch or femme, straight or gay. Their fresh view on life, their raw courage to try new things, their stamina amazes me. That's one reason I've covered music for so long. Younger people keep me young and keep me looking forward toward the next sunrise.

But to date? I prefer someone a bit younger (or someone who has that same youthful attack on life). But my cut off is about 20 years my junior. Once someone is in their 40s the age and generational barriers dissolve. It's a matter of personal charisma and, of course, integrity.