would you date someone with significantly different beliefs?

[aishah]

Originally Posted by Silverseastar

I would date someone with different beliefs but not with different VALUES. Beliefs are relative and change over time but values are fixed and won't change.

So someone can believe what they like and as their partner you can see that shift over time but what they value will never change. Just as what they don't value won't change either.

For instance I value good communication, kindness, love in action, family/friends as examples. The way in which I hold those doesn't change for me over time.

However how that is expressed might.

i think this is an interesting post, mostly because i have a pretty defined system of values/principles that i use on a day-to-day basis, that are probably more specific and contextual than what you mean here by values. my partners don't necessarily share this entire list of values, though they do share some. for me it's important that our values not conflict.

re: what others have posted...i loved reading everyone's responses so far. i definitely agree that i wouldn't date someone who i think is unethical, dishonest, or bigoted, but to me being a conservative republican (or having some other specific label) doesn't necessarily mean that one falls into that category.

i also definitely get what was said about other things (goals, plans for the future, money, kids, etc.) often being more important than beliefs when it comes to compatibility. i guess i'm just fascinated by the ways in which beliefs play into compatibility. i definitely do not think it is the only or even the main factor for some folks.

edited to add: i also think the notion of "values" in general is pretty interesting. i don't know that many people who expressly articulate their values to themselves or others...i feel like i don't have a sense of someone's values until i know them very well and it's not one of those things that people usually ask directly. and i've dated people who i'm not sure if they could have said what their values are, if asked.