Long Distance - How do you cope?

[Ciaran]

Originally Posted by Arwen

Oh, I think the same of meeting someone in your own town too. 3-6 months before you uproot you or them.

For me, even in same city without the same logistics challenges and risks, I wouldn't uproot for someone inside 6 months nor would I want someone to look to move in with me inside 6 months of dating.

A year plus and then start to consider it .....

[Novelafemme]

Originally Posted by Ciaran

For me, even in same city without the same logistics challenges and risks, I wouldn't uproot for someone inside 6 months nor would I want someone to look to move in with me inside 6 months of dating.

A year plus and then start to consider it .....

I like this rule as well and have only ever lived with two people...the first being my husband of 15 years and the second being an on again/off again boyfriend before I came out, and that was mostly out of necessity and poor judgement on my part.

When I met Katy it was the perfect set of circumstances and I just released all fear and doubt that were clinging on by their nails from past relationships and opened my heart to what the universe had in store. And for the first time in my life I felt nothing but peace around my decision. We had work to do right from the beginning...especially me since I had come from a relationship where I was accused of everything imaginable (some true but mostly not) and I was really struggling to trust myself. I had lost that ability and was scared and frequently on the defense...which is not like me at all.

I guess my point is that when you find something and someone that is worth the blessed offering that is your heart and your love, go into it not only cautiously optimistic but realistic as well. We all have our baggage and finding someone who is "perfect" just isn't going to happen. But when you are willing to let your guard down and do the work it takes to make a truly beautiful communion of hearts and souls work...it is so worth it!