PTSD and Trauma recovery

[Dragonfly]

This is a great idea. Many thoughts and blessings towards this beginning of support and encouragement for all of us living with ptsd. I have recieved so much love and strength from my fellow BFers on other sites! I really cant express here what some of you have meant in my life. But you already know cause I have been there for you too. That's one of the best parts of it, being understood even in our silence.... Big love to all those who are opening up and sharing. Some of us who have shared elsewhere are coming to the table to share our experiences here too, there are more of us living with it than people realize.

[Goofy]

Just a thought for the group chats...

I attend group sessions for PTSD at the VA. One of the rules of the group is that we don't tell "war stories" that might trigger other participants. What we DO do is discuss how we are doing in our daily lives and triggers we may face and what we can do to help each other and ourselves through the rough times.

I've found that, almost more than anything else, is that there are other folks out there that are going through the same types of things. Much of what I see happening in this thread.

[Dragonfly]

Goofy,
Good point, wanting to know more about your group though...
I am curious as to the specifics of HOW your group discusses triggers and daily dealing without mentioning any of the "war story". In my experiences, my triggers come FROM what happened and that makes it very difficult to discuss without it relating to others what happened to me. Everyone's PTSD is coming from different places and not just from the same shared "war". On other sites we Title our sensitive sharing type posts with "possibly triggering" and/ or write in red. With chat that wont be possible as we are interacting without pre thought out posts and titles.

[Goofy]

Originally Posted by Amelia

Goofy,
Good point, wanting to know more about your group though...
I am curious as to the specifics of HOW your group discusses triggers and daily dealing without mentioning any of the "war story". In my experiences, my triggers come FROM what happened and that makes it very difficult to discuss without it relating to others what happened to me. Everyone's PTSD is coming from different places and not just from the same shared "war". On other sites we Title our sensitive sharing type posts with "possibly triggering" and/ or write in red. With chat that wont be possible as we are interacting without pre thought out posts and titles.

It's true that triggers come from what happened, and that's why we're there in the first place. In my group, many triggers involve anniversary dates of an event, and we bring that up as such. Like, "I have an anniversary coming up and I've realized I'm more anxious, quick to anger..." etc. Others involve situations, smells or events. We bring those up in the same sort of ways, without revealing details. It's kind of difficult to explain the exact "how's" of how we get around it, but we do.

My PTSD stems both from childhood trauma and a situation I was in while in the Army. Since it's a VA group, it's much easier to not reveal histories of situations related to the military because, to some degree, we all have a similar experience. But I've also found that those folks are pretty accepting of non-military related triggers. Once, someone brought up a subject that was a trigger from my childhood. I started to twitch, literally. I told him it was a trigger for me; that it was something that happened when I was young. That's all I needed to say. No one questioned me as to what happened or why it was a trigger. We talked instead about *now*; how it presented itself (anxiety, anger, etc) and how to deal with that.

I bring all of this up because I know that when it was suggested that I start attending the PTSD group that I'm now a part of, that I had so many reservations. I didn't want to tell my stories to a bunch of strangers, regardless of whether they had been through similar situations or not. I didn't necessarily want to hear anyone else's story, lest they trigger me. I've been in the same group for almost a year now, and most days it's a life line. I feel sane, despite the insanity.


I'm not sure if this makes as much sense to you, or anyone else, as it does in my head. But I hope it clarified a bit.

[Goofy]

And I just feel compelled to say that I don't mean in any way to dismiss the people who are sharing their experiences in this thread. I was just throwing out an idea stemming from an earlier post about someone not wanting to share their particular experience and how to navigate around that.

I know for many that sharing their experience(s) is cathartic on some level. But for others it's difficult and downright painful.

[Dragonfly]

Originally Posted by Goofy

It's true that triggers come from what happened, and that's why we're there in the first place. In my group, many triggers involve anniversary dates of an event, and we bring that up as such. Like, "I have an anniversary coming up and I've realized I'm more anxious, quick to anger..." etc. Others involve situations, smells or events. We bring those up in the same sort of ways, without revealing details. It's kind of difficult to explain the exact "how's" of how we get around it, but we do.

My PTSD stems both from childhood trauma and a situation I was in while in the Army. Since it's a VA group, it's much easier to not reveal histories of situations related to the military because, to some degree, we all have a similar experience. But I've also found that those folks are pretty accepting of non-military related triggers. Once, someone brought up a subject that was a trigger from my childhood. I started to twitch, literally. I told him it was a trigger for me; that it was something that happened when I was young. That's all I needed to say. No one questioned me as to what happened or why it was a trigger. We talked instead about *now*; how it presented itself (anxiety, anger, etc) and how to deal with that.

I bring all of this up because I know that when it was suggested that I start attending the PTSD group that I'm now a part of, that I had so many reservations. I didn't want to tell my stories to a bunch of strangers, regardless of whether they had been through similar situations or not. I didn't necessarily want to hear anyone else's story, lest they trigger me. I've been in the same group for almost a year now, and most days it's a life line. I feel sane, despite the insanity.


I'm not sure if this makes as much sense to you, or anyone else, as it does in my head. But I hope it clarified a bit.

Yes, total sense.... except the part where "a subject came up". Thats the part I meant when I asked how do you discuss triggers without triggering someone accidentally.... Not meaning telling your stories, or asking each other why what happened, but I meant like a guideline maybe for avoiding the subjects completely so as to NOT trigger someone.

And wow, I dont want to have anyone sharing personal stuff to be viewed as a 'pissing contest' to someone else, that must have been a terrible experience to feel like someone wanted to "top" how bad their experience was and compare themselves to others. Now I am really leary to join a support type group other than the one I have already participated in online.

I hope there are clear guidelines for the PTSD room. Sadly my craputer isnt as compatible with the chat here as I'd thought it was at first. It freezes and crashes. Hope there will be after thoughts that make it to the forums for us readers.

Peace and Healing thoughts for all...

[Andrew, Jr.]

It never crossed my mind that our "war stories" were pissing contests. Is this a military thing? I just don't see it at all. To me, pain is pain. No matter the origin.

[Apocalipstic]

Very respectfully,

To be honest, I feel like the tread I started has been hijacked. There is now a trauma group on chat I don't have access too, and guidelines on what we can discuss.

I know everyone means well, but I need this and I feel like it is being taken away and I am being chastised for wanting an open space.

I wanted a place we could share day to day stuff that freaks us out due to PTSD and trauma. I don't think it helps anyone for us to share in secret, I go to therapy for that.

I wanted people not to feel so alone, and now I feel incredibly alone. Nauseated in fact.

Is there something better I can name a thread that is open for us to discuss daily stuff where people who are not comfortable to actually share can at least know they are not the only one. I hate the idea of a secret password.

I need a thread for discussion and support and this one seems to have been led in a completely different direction.

Seriously, if you need this thread to be a private group chat 2 hours a week, great, but help me know what to name a thread that those of us who are past being afraid or just don't care can use.

[Princess4u]

Originally Posted by apocalipstic

Ah Thank you for explaining!

I am not a mental health professional, so I would not want to be seen in any way as a facilitator...just a friend discussing with anyone who wants to.

Originally Posted by Andrew, Jr.

It never crossed my mind that our "war stories" were pissing contests. Is this a military thing? I just don't see it at all. To me, pain is pain. No matter the origin.

That is my point Andrew...but what I am saying is that there are those out there who feel validated for some reason...thinking they have suffered worse...there is no "worse" its all worse....!!! I suppose to me what is boils down to...is how one copes with things...and we all have coping issues...or we wouldnt be here..and we need support and friends not to feel minimized or degrated. Sorry if that wasnt stated more clearly....I guess I see us as a community who needs to sticky by one another not push us apart. If we didnt need support, again we wouldnt have reached out to this thread. Again, I thank those who started it and who post here...becase it is a horrible place to be when you feel alone, as we all have experienced.

[Princess4u]

Originally Posted by Goofy

Just a thought for the group chats...

I attend group sessions for PTSD at the VA. One of the rules of the group is that we don't tell "war stories" that might trigger other participants. What we DO do is discuss how we are doing in our daily lives and triggers we may face and what we can do to help each other and ourselves through the rough times.

I've found that, almost more than anything else, is that there are other folks out there that are going through the same types of things. Much of what I see happening in this thread.

Goofy, you are soooo very right!! I think all too often it isnt about telling "war" stories but needing to compare and see who suffered worse trauma...sad thing is that nothing is won w the proverbial "pissing contest" everyone has suffered isnt that sad enough....why keep reliving it....lets help eachother to move forward not backwards and be a SUPPORT not a demon to one another....I am so glad you pointed this out and have the professional background to support it..that means a great deal....thank you