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Old 10-14-2012, 09:38 AM   #11
pajama
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Default Communication

Y'all know I am a HUGE flirt. Whether people are in or out of a relationship. Some people I flirt more cautiously with, other more sexually with. Both in or out of a relationship. But often (I try to always but always is a big word) I will touch base with people that are in relationships and make sure I'm not crossing a line. I don't see lines very well.

My point to this, is, for me, whether to incestuously date in my community is based on COMMUNICATION. And communication works both ways. If you tell me you are okay with it, then I expect that to be the truth and will move forward accordingly. If you tell me no, then I will back away.

I haven't always communicated well with my partners, but I tend to do it pretty well with my friends. I had an ex that after appropriate time, we became friends, family again even. I found myself falling in love with her partner. As soon as I realized it, I TOLD HER (the ex). For the 10 years that they were together I respected their relationship and even respected my friendship (even when she confided in me that she was having an affair on her partner). (Whole 'nother thread) So, I guess, in part as Snowy said it comes down to each individuals integrity.

I also agree if one is given the green light, be thoughtful and respectful. It may truly be ok with your friend that you date so-and-so, but that doesn't mean it might not sting a bit if she sees it.

Very thought provoking thread Anya. Thank you.

A
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