what NOT to do in a relationship....... - Page 31

PearlsNLace · 03-21-2013, 09:38 PM

Don't forget to listen with your heart.

TheMerryFairy · 03-22-2013, 01:13 PM

Don't forget your own worth!

Enchantress · 03-22-2013, 01:18 PM

Never use sensitive issues, thoughts or ideas that have been shared in an intimate and trusting venue, against the sharer. It's awful, and will surely make one party feel emotionally unsafe. And, if that happens, all bets are off (the relationship too).

Novelafemme · 03-22-2013, 01:29 PM

Don't be a dick!

clay · 03-22-2013, 05:34 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Enchantress

Never use sensitive issues, thoughts or ideas that have been shared in an intimate and trusting venue, against the sharer. It's awful, and will surely make one party feel emotionally unsafe. And, if that happens, all bets are off (the relationship too).

Echoing your sentiments exactly!

StrongButch · 03-22-2013, 05:52 PM

1) blame someone for your behavior 2) assume 3)fail to listen to what they need 4) play the victim 5) get others involved 6) intentionally hurt them 7) try to get them angry

JAGG · 03-23-2013, 09:04 AM

Don't assume. Give the other person the opportunity to show you who they are.

Admin · 03-23-2013, 10:40 AM

Folks -

We are getting reports about some of the language being used in here. Can we please dispense with the "douchebags" and "dicks"?

Here is the thing about language on this website: Cursing is fine, but we need folks to be a lot more thoughtful about using gendered language.

This thread has HUGE potential to be used for negativity so folks need to be super careful about what they post. I dont want to see this thread shut down.

Thanks

dixie · 03-24-2013, 08:54 AM

Do not.....take them for granted or treat them as "less than".

Do not......miss an opportunity to tell them how you feel, or even give them a compliment or a positive affirmation.

Sweet Bliss · 03-24-2013, 10:10 PM

Remember to use your best manners... it shows respect to others...

to be helpful ... it shows a caring nature ...

to be forgiving... it shows you know how

to spend your time together.... together

Duchess · 03-24-2013, 10:16 PM

Never text serious conversations.

Duchess · 03-24-2013, 10:21 PM

Don't ignore your intuition.

AtLast · 03-24-2013, 10:27 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Duchess

Don't ignore your intuition.

Absolutely never ignore your intuition!

TheMerryFairy · 03-24-2013, 10:47 PM

Don't stop saying "I love you"

~ocean · 03-24-2013, 10:53 PM

don't forget to say you are sorry ~

Enchantress · 03-24-2013, 11:00 PM

Never use the phrase "I'm fine".

When you say it, you're rarely 'fine'. So, why not speak the truth. Tell your lover exactly what you're feeling. They're (most likely) not a mind reader. And, when you use 'fine', in my estimation, you're simply saying go to hell or something a bit more unsavory ...

Duchess · 03-25-2013, 12:09 PM

Don't lose yourself. If your partner can't appreciate who you are, keep it moving.

Ascot · 03-25-2013, 12:15 PM

Don't lose sight of your limits. Don't be unclear when expressing them. Do not fault someone for pushing them too firmly if they've not been clearly delineated. (All of this presumes you know your limits and does not speak to those limits that sometimes spring up and punch us in the neck sans warning.)

Duchess · 03-25-2013, 12:32 PM

Don't include your partner in major purchases to show a sign of togetherness, like buying a house, unless they are creditworthy and your relationship is solid.

Glenn · 03-25-2013, 12:51 PM

Don't be anybody's secret side thing. Don't let your fellow brothers and sisters get played. Be fair. Don't make them do anything you would'nt want done to you. We should be looking out for each other in such a nasty world. Don't ever let cheating be an option. Make sure you've moved on first from your lasr relationship, before you even think about starting to date. If they cheat, they're done. Absolutely no exceptions.

03-21-2013, 09:38 PM	#601
PearlsNLace Member How Do You Identify?: queer Preferred Pronoun?: They/Them & her/she Relationship Status: Lucky, very lucky Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Portlandia, Oregon Posts: 427 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 875 Thanked 1,286 Times in 315 Posts Rep Power: 6505517	Don't forget to listen with your heart. __________________ YOU are Unique and Unrepeatable AND your not alone. thetrevorproject.org

03-22-2013, 01:18 PM	#603
Enchantress Senior Member How Do You Identify?: A complex confection. Preferred Pronoun?: Miss Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: The land of milk and honey. Posts: 2,169 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 741 Thanked 3,420 Times in 1,200 Posts Rep Power: 21474853	Because without trust, you've got nothing ... Never use sensitive issues, thoughts or ideas that have been shared in an intimate and trusting venue, against the sharer. It's awful, and will surely make one party feel emotionally unsafe. And, if that happens, all bets are off (the relationship too). Last edited by Enchantress; 03-22-2013 at 01:21 PM. Reason: If someone is brave enough to share something difficult, then shouldn't it be cherished?

03-22-2013, 05:52 PM	#606
StrongButch Member How Do You Identify?: I see the world thru a lens Preferred Pronoun?: Yes Boss Relationship Status: Chillin out with awesome women Join Date: Jan 2010 Location: San Francisco Posts: 1,376 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 4,018 Thanked 4,183 Times in 1,180 Posts Rep Power: 21474853	Not 1) blame someone for your behavior 2) assume 3)fail to listen to what they need 4) play the victim 5) get others involved 6) intentionally hurt them 7) try to get them angry __________________ Life is like music,so it can be played in many different styles.

03-23-2013, 09:04 AM	#607
JAGG Infamous Member How Do You Identify?: Butch Preferred Pronoun?: JAGG Relationship Status: =) Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Tulsa (cat free zone) Posts: 6,093 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 18,651 Thanked 17,531 Times in 4,137 Posts Rep Power: 21474858	Don't assume. Give the other person the opportunity to show you who they are. __________________ I don't want to spend my life with someone I can live with, I want to spend my life with someone I can't live without.

03-24-2013, 10:16 PM	#611
Duchess Senior Member How Do You Identify?: Absolute Femme Preferred Pronoun?: She Relationship Status: Toe curling :-) Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Atlanta Posts: 2,382 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 1,792 Thanked 5,592 Times in 1,521 Posts Rep Power: 21474854	*Never text serious conversations.* __________________ *無料のライブ*

03-22-2013, 01:13 PM	#602
TheMerryFairy Senior Member How Do You Identify?: Pansexual/Sapiosexual femmey dyke who likes to crossdress now and then Preferred Pronoun?: She/her OR ze if I'm crossdressing Relationship Status: Floating and walking My path, happy in life. Join Date: Dec 2012 Location: On my Merry Fairy way! , Canada Posts: 3,630 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 8,727 Thanked 8,694 Times in 2,987 Posts Rep Power: 21474852	Don't forget your own worth!

03-22-2013, 01:29 PM	#604
Novelafemme Timed Out - TOS Drama How Do You Identify?: ........ Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: ........ Posts: 2,402 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 4,981 Thanked 8,925 Times in 1,834 Posts Rep Power: 0	Don't be a dick!

03-23-2013, 10:40 AM	#608
Admin Administrator How Do You Identify?: Queer High Femme Preferred Pronoun?: She/Her Relationship Status: Married to JD. Join Date: Oct 2009 Location: The Planet Posts: 1,686 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 394 Thanked 5,625 Times in 1,013 Posts Rep Power: 21474853	Folks - We are getting reports about some of the language being used in here. Can we please dispense with the "douchebags" and "dicks"? Here is the thing about language on this website: Cursing is fine, but we need folks to be a lot more thoughtful about using gendered language. This thread has HUGE potential to be used for negativity so folks need to be super careful about what they post. I dont want to see this thread shut down. Thanks

03-24-2013, 08:54 AM	#609
dixie Infamous Member How Do You Identify?: I usually just poke it with a stick. Preferred Pronoun?: Bitch Relationship Status: Intertwined deeply Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: We're all a little mad here. Posts: 6,627 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 10,972 Thanked 21,384 Times in 4,808 Posts Rep Power: 21474858	Do not.....take them for granted or treat them as "less than". Do not......miss an opportunity to tell them how you feel, or even give them a compliment or a positive affirmation.

03-24-2013, 10:10 PM	#610
Sweet Bliss Senior Member How Do You Identify?: I Am Preferred Pronoun?: she Relationship Status: solo Join Date: Mar 2010 Location: the Beach, Pacific side Posts: 4,160 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 5,354 Thanked 7,267 Times in 2,158 Posts Rep Power: 21474856	Remember to use your best manners... it shows respect to others... to be helpful ... it shows a caring nature ... to be forgiving... it shows you know how to spend your time together.... together

03-24-2013, 10:21 PM	#612
Duchess Senior Member How Do You Identify?: Absolute Femme Preferred Pronoun?: She Relationship Status: Toe curling :-) Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Atlanta Posts: 2,382 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 1,792 Thanked 5,592 Times in 1,521 Posts Rep Power: 21474854	*Don't ignore your intuition.* __________________ *無料のライブ*

03-24-2013, 10:47 PM	#614
TheMerryFairy Senior Member How Do You Identify?: Pansexual/Sapiosexual femmey dyke who likes to crossdress now and then Preferred Pronoun?: She/her OR ze if I'm crossdressing Relationship Status: Floating and walking My path, happy in life. Join Date: Dec 2012 Location: On my Merry Fairy way! , Canada Posts: 3,630 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 8,727 Thanked 8,694 Times in 2,987 Posts Rep Power: 21474852	Don't stop saying "I love you"

03-24-2013, 10:53 PM	#615
~ocean Infamous Member How Do You Identify?: femme blows a kiss off my finger tips * Preferred Pronoun?: ~ hey girl ~ Relationship Status: ~ single & content ~ Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Massachusetts ~coastal Posts: 7,905 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 22,958 Thanked 16,045 Times in 4,728 Posts Rep Power: 21474859	don't forget to say you are sorry ~ __________________ ~ Always, ocean

03-24-2013, 11:00 PM	#616
Enchantress Senior Member How Do You Identify?: A complex confection. Preferred Pronoun?: Miss Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: The land of milk and honey. Posts: 2,169 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 741 Thanked 3,420 Times in 1,200 Posts Rep Power: 21474853	Use your words. Never use the phrase "I'm fine". When you say it, you're rarely 'fine'. So, why not speak the truth. Tell your lover exactly what you're feeling. They're (most likely) not a mind reader. And, when you use 'fine', in my estimation, you're simply saying go to hell or something a bit more unsavory ...

03-25-2013, 12:09 PM	#617
Duchess Senior Member How Do You Identify?: Absolute Femme Preferred Pronoun?: She Relationship Status: Toe curling :-) Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Atlanta Posts: 2,382 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 1,792 Thanked 5,592 Times in 1,521 Posts Rep Power: 21474854	*Don't lose yourself. If your partner can't appreciate who you are, keep it moving.* __________________ *無料のライブ*

03-25-2013, 12:15 PM	#618
Ascot Member How Do You Identify?: Preppy Butch artist Relationship Status: Riding solo Join Date: Aug 2012 Location: North of the Emerald City Posts: 1,135 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 179 Thanked 2,487 Times in 549 Posts Rep Power: 21474850	Don't lose sight of your limits. Don't be unclear when expressing them. Do not fault someone for pushing them too firmly if they've not been clearly delineated. (All of this presumes you know your limits and does not speak to those limits that sometimes spring up and punch us in the neck sans warning.) __________________ Now, if I could just find a way to get paid for what I can do with my tongue and a cherry stem.

03-25-2013, 12:32 PM	#619
Duchess Senior Member How Do You Identify?: Absolute Femme Preferred Pronoun?: She Relationship Status: Toe curling :-) Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Atlanta Posts: 2,382 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 1,792 Thanked 5,592 Times in 1,521 Posts Rep Power: 21474854	*Don't include your partner in major purchases to show a sign of togetherness, like buying a house, unless they are creditworthy and your relationship is solid.* __________________ *無料のライブ*

03-25-2013, 12:51 PM	#620
Glenn Senior Member How Do You Identify?: Dear ol butch bones. Preferred Pronoun?: Old G Relationship Status: Too old to play. Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: :rolleyes: Posts: 1,547 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 3,601 Thanked 3,730 Times in 1,095 Posts Rep Power: 21474853	Don't be anybody's secret side thing. Don't let your fellow brothers and sisters get played. Be fair. Don't make them do anything you would'nt want done to you. We should be looking out for each other in such a nasty world. Don't ever let cheating be an option. Make sure you've moved on first from your lasr relationship, before you even think about starting to date. If they cheat, they're done. Absolutely no exceptions.

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