What Do You Miss?

[imperfect_cupcake]

Originally Posted by LaneyDoll

I was chatting with a friend today and asked her "what do you miss most about being with someone?"

I think that, for me anyway, I miss having someone to go home to, to go to bed with (and wake up beside)-to just share a life with.

I had an ex once who would rub lotion on my feet, knees and elbows while we watched a movie together. I miss that little gesture-I am bad to forget to "lotion." lol

It is the little things that I find myself missing.

So, I wanted to ask the same question here...

What things do you miss about being in a relationship?

Not a whole lot, to be honest. I've been single now for almost a year, but the previous relationship wasn't very committed we were just very close friends.

It's been over two years since my marriage broke. It was very hard to be alone and to do without sleeping with someone, having someone to do things with on that level of intimacy. It was incredibly hard.

I still had sex and casual interactions and hanging out. Which I suppose was like a slow weaning off of being so involved with someone. I did a stint on celibacy and no dates for 8 months to just focus on me completely and school.

Now? I don't really miss generic things about relationships. I still miss the level of friendship I had with my exwife and my sexual friendship with T. I don't specifically miss them, I am actually very ok with not being with them lol
But I do miss the level of depth of understanding and linking.

I get very similar with my platonic friends and the casual sex I very occasionally hook up with. But not to quite the same depth. The trade off is, I have a high level of freedom and independence I could never have if I was involved. I never have to explain myself or excuse myself to anyone. And I do start getting irritated/resentful if I have to explain my absence/silence to someone. I feel that's answering to someone and I don't like it.

But I do miss the weekend morning layabouts and sex and having a day adventure, holding hands.

I can have adventures with my mates, I can tell my friends anything at all, be utterly open with them. And they know me incredibly well and thus totally accept me. I can cuddle a bit with them and with my sex friends. I'm far from lonely and I'm pretty content with my life as is. And I don't think I'd be willing to give up my independence for that. But I do miss it a little, now and again.