Something horrible just happened

[anaisninja]

Originally Posted by Words

I'm sorry this happened to you.

I DO think you're possibly trying a little too hard and that you could be coming off as being needy. My concern though after having read some of your previous posts - and I won't go into details here because I'm not clear as to the rules regarding quoting material from other threads - is that in your (perfectly understandable) quest to get your new life as a lesbian off the ground, you're putting yourself not only at emotional risk, but also at physical risk. I know that personally, if we were to go on a date and you were to tell me a couple of things that I've read in your previous posts, one thing in particular, I'd definitely be thinking, wow, that was a little reckless and that it would leave doubts in my mind as to whether or not we were further date material (I'll pm you and let you know what I'm referring to.)

Anyway, the best advice that I can give you as someone who came out pretty late herself (40) is, what will be, will be. Yes, you have to do your part in terms of making it happen... but you also have to have faith.

Good luck!

Hi Words, I will respond openly to your post because I have nothing to be ashamed of.

The flogging to which you refer in your PM took place at Seattle's Center for Sex-Positive Culture (cspc), during a monthly Women in Kink (WinK) event. All participants in these events are required to complete a new member orientation, which includes all aspects of informed consent. I, and the other two women who were flogged by the practitioner that evening, had complete control over the activities in which we chose to participate. In addition, a volunteer monitored the room to ensure that we were all safe and sound.

While I agree that, insofar as dating is concerned, I may have been trying too hard to please the woman in question, whether or not I choose to participate consensually in BDSM seems irrelevant.

ETA...

Also, I'm not in the habit of blurting out personal details about my love life in my day-to-day life. My real-world friends know me as a low key, friendly, nurturing, no-drama, easy-going person. I joined this site *specifically* so that I could be completely open in a safe space about the confusing life transition I find myself undergoing. I intend to continue doing so, whether or not others approve.