Today Is.....

Diva · 05-04-2010, 06:34 AM

NJFemmie · 05-04-2010, 06:42 AM

Q. What Do You Call A Frightened Scuba Diver?
A. Chicken Of The Sea.

Q. What Do You Get When You Cross A Chicken And A Pit Bull?
A. Just The Pit Bull.

Q. What Do You Get When You Cross A Chicken With A Bell?
A. An Alarm Cluck.

Q. What Do You Get When You Cross A Chicken With A Dog?
A. A Hen That Lays Pooched Eggs.

Q. What Do You Get When You Cross A Chicken With A Race-Horse?
A. A Hen That Lays Odds.

Q. What Do You Get When You Cross A Ghost With A Chicken?
A. A Poultry-Geist.

Q. What Goes Peck, Peck, Peck, Boom?
A. A Chicken In A Mine Field.

Q. Why Did The Chicken Cross The Playground?
A. To Get To The Other Slide.

Diva · 05-04-2010, 06:53 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by NJFemmie

Q. What Do You Call A Frightened Scuba Diver?
A. Chicken Of The Sea.

Q. What Do You Get When You Cross A Chicken And A Pit Bull?
A. Just The Pit Bull.

Q. What Do You Get When You Cross A Chicken With A Bell?
A. An Alarm Cluck.

Q. What Do You Get When You Cross A Chicken With A Dog?
A. A Hen That Lays Pooched Eggs.

Q. What Do You Get When You Cross A Chicken With A Race-Horse?
A. A Hen That Lays Odds.

Q. What Do You Get When You Cross A Ghost With A Chicken?
A. A Poultry-Geist.

Q. What Goes Peck, Peck, Peck, Boom?
A. A Chicken In A Mine Field.

Q. Why Did The Chicken Cross The Playground?
A. To Get To The Other Slide.

I will not laugh at these.
I will not laugh at these.
I will not laugh at these......

....for I know that it only encourages You.

Ok, I may have laughed a LITTLE. Like a mini~snicker. Or a tiny chortle.

NJFemmie · 05-04-2010, 07:08 AM

Billy's mother was called into the school one day by the principal. "We're very worried about Billy," he said. "He goes round all day cluck, cluck, clucking." "That's right," said Billy's mother. "He thinks he's a chicken." "Haven't you taken him to a psychiatrist?" "Well, we would, but we need the eggs."

Diva · 05-04-2010, 07:14 AM

..............................................

Diva · 05-04-2010, 07:19 AM

Chickens are important. I rest my case....

Albert Einstein:
Whether the chicken crossed the road or the road crossed the chicken depends upon your frame of reference.

Ralph Waldo Emerson:
It didn't cross the road; it transcended it.

M.C.Escher:
That depends on which plane of reality the chicken was on at the time.

Freud:
The fact that you thought that the chicken crossed the road reveals your underlying sexual insecurity.

Bill Gates:
To purchase Chicken 2.01a, which will both cross roads and calculate the energy it used. There are bugs, yes, but if you uninstall Traffic 2.0 and Farmer 1.2 it will run. If it freezes at WhiteLine 2.0, we have a patch ...

Harpo Marx:
Honk! Honk! Honk!

Jackie Mason:
Whaddaya want, it should just stand there?

Fox Mulder:
It was a government conspiracy.

Jack Nicholson:
'Cause it ***** wanted to. That's the ****** reason.

Nietzsche:
Because if you gaze too long across the Road, the Road gazes also across you.

Richard M. Nixon: The chicken did not cross the road. I repeat, the chicken did not cross the road.

George Orwell:
Because the government had fooled him into thinking that he was crossing the road of his own free will, when he was really only serving their interests.

Plato:
For the greater good.

Pyrrho the Skeptic:
What road?

Colonel Sanders:
I missed one?

Jean-Paul Sartre:
In order to act in good faith and be true to itself, the chicken found it necessary to cross the road.

Arnold Schwartznegger:
It vill be back.

Jerry Seinfeld:
Why does anyone cross a road? I mean, why doesn't anyone ever think to ask, "What the heck was this chicken doing walking around all over the place anyway?"

Dr. Seuss:
Did the chicken cross the road?
Did he cross it with a toad?
Yes the chicken crossed the road,
but why he crossed, I've not been told!

NJFemmie · 05-04-2010, 07:20 AM

Okay... I have something that I think will entertain you.

http://www.bk.com/en/us/campaigns/subservient-chicken.html

go ahead... tell it what to do!

NJFemmie · 05-04-2010, 07:47 AM

(heh, pardon the pun)

redrose · 05-04-2010, 07:50 AM

today is,,, such a boring day,,,

Tommi · 05-04-2010, 06:47 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Diva

Oy Oy Oy,,,,

This is just what I need. Poster size for me...

Thanks for all the fun stuff Diva and the
thread posters

Tommi

05-04-2010, 06:42 AM	#2
NJFemmie Senior Member How Do You Identify?: The original lime-twisted femme Preferred Pronoun?: I answer to most things, especially lesbian. Relationship Status: Still loving my Mare ;) Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: New Jersey Posts: 4,683 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 1,343 Thanked 11,421 Times in 2,977 Posts Rep Power: 21474856	Q. What Do You Call A Frightened Scuba Diver? A. Chicken Of The Sea. Q. What Do You Get When You Cross A Chicken And A Pit Bull? A. Just The Pit Bull. Q. What Do You Get When You Cross A Chicken With A Bell? A. An Alarm Cluck. Q. What Do You Get When You Cross A Chicken With A Dog? A. A Hen That Lays Pooched Eggs. Q. What Do You Get When You Cross A Chicken With A Race-Horse? A. A Hen That Lays Odds. Q. What Do You Get When You Cross A Ghost With A Chicken? A. A Poultry-Geist. Q. What Goes Peck, Peck, Peck, Boom? A. A Chicken In A Mine Field. Q. Why Did The Chicken Cross The Playground? A. To Get To The Other Slide. __________________

05-04-2010, 07:08 AM	#4
NJFemmie Senior Member How Do You Identify?: The original lime-twisted femme Preferred Pronoun?: I answer to most things, especially lesbian. Relationship Status: Still loving my Mare ;) Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: New Jersey Posts: 4,683 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 1,343 Thanked 11,421 Times in 2,977 Posts Rep Power: 21474856	I'm persistent .... Billy's mother was called into the school one day by the principal. "We're very worried about Billy," he said. "He goes round all day cluck, cluck, clucking." "That's right," said Billy's mother. "He thinks he's a chicken." "Haven't you taken him to a psychiatrist?" "Well, we would, but we need the eggs." __________________

05-04-2010, 07:19 AM	#6
Diva Timed Out How Do You Identify?: Diva Preferred Pronoun?: Diva Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Chez Diva Posts: 11,879 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 9,263 Thanked 17,175 Times in 5,239 Posts Rep Power: 0	Chickens are important. I rest my case.... Albert Einstein: Whether the chicken crossed the road or the road crossed the chicken depends upon your frame of reference. Ralph Waldo Emerson: It didn't cross the road; it transcended it. M.C.Escher: That depends on which plane of reality the chicken was on at the time. Freud: The fact that you thought that the chicken crossed the road reveals your underlying sexual insecurity. Bill Gates: To purchase Chicken 2.01a, which will both cross roads and calculate the energy it used. There are bugs, yes, but if you uninstall Traffic 2.0 and Farmer 1.2 it will run. If it freezes at WhiteLine 2.0, we have a patch ... Harpo Marx: Honk! Honk! Honk! Jackie Mason: Whaddaya want, it should just stand there? Fox Mulder: It was a government conspiracy. Jack Nicholson: 'Cause it *** wanted to. That's the **** reason. Nietzsche: Because if you gaze too long across the Road, the Road gazes also across you. Richard M. Nixon: The chicken did not cross the road. I repeat, the chicken did not cross the road. George Orwell: Because the government had fooled him into thinking that he was crossing the road of his own free will, when he was really only serving their interests. Plato: For the greater good. Pyrrho the Skeptic: What road? Colonel Sanders: I missed one? Jean-Paul Sartre: In order to act in good faith and be true to itself, the chicken found it necessary to cross the road. Arnold Schwartznegger: It vill be back. Jerry Seinfeld: Why does anyone cross a road? I mean, why doesn't anyone ever think to ask, "What the heck was this chicken doing walking around all over the place anyway?" Dr. Seuss: Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a toad? Yes the chicken crossed the road, but why he crossed, I've not been told! Last edited by Diva; 05-04-2010 at 07:22 AM.

05-04-2010, 07:20 AM	#7
NJFemmie Senior Member How Do You Identify?: The original lime-twisted femme Preferred Pronoun?: I answer to most things, especially lesbian. Relationship Status: Still loving my Mare ;) Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: New Jersey Posts: 4,683 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 1,343 Thanked 11,421 Times in 2,977 Posts Rep Power: 21474856	Okay... I have something that I think will entertain you. http://www.bk.com/en/us/campaigns/subservient-chicken.html go ahead... tell it what to do! __________________

05-04-2010, 07:47 AM	#8
NJFemmie Senior Member How Do You Identify?: The original lime-twisted femme Preferred Pronoun?: I answer to most things, especially lesbian. Relationship Status: Still loving my Mare ;) Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: New Jersey Posts: 4,683 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 1,343 Thanked 11,421 Times in 2,977 Posts Rep Power: 21474856	One for the road.... (heh, pardon the pun) __________________

05-04-2010, 06:34 AM	#1
Diva Timed Out How Do You Identify?: Diva Preferred Pronoun?: Diva Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Chez Diva Posts: 11,879 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 9,263 Thanked 17,175 Times in 5,239 Posts Rep Power: 0

05-04-2010, 07:14 AM	#5
Diva Timed Out How Do You Identify?: Diva Preferred Pronoun?: Diva Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Chez Diva Posts: 11,879 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 9,263 Thanked 17,175 Times in 5,239 Posts Rep Power: 0	*..............................................*

05-04-2010, 07:50 AM	#9
redrose Member How Do You Identify?: femme Preferred Pronoun?: she Relationship Status: at peace Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Philippines Posts: 291 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 62 Thanked 252 Times in 123 Posts Rep Power: 276025	today is,,, such a boring day,,, __________________ ... death leaves a heartache no one can heal, love leaves a memory no one can steal ... http://youtu.be/N0SgLJEtaok

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