The Loft: Butches and Femmes in their 40s, 50s and over.

[Blade]

Just a thought for those who do celebrate Christmas, or any holiday where there are gatherings of family and friends. How has your roll changed as you have aged say from a 20 yr old to now. I assume that as kids all we do is play and maybe help put ice in the glasses or something like that. So since you became an adult how has your roll in your holiday traditions changed?

[easygoingfemme]

Originally Posted by Blade

Just a thought for those who do celebrate Christmas, or any holiday where there are gatherings of family and friends. How has your roll changed as you have aged say from a 20 yr old to now. I assume that as kids all we do is play and maybe help put ice in the glasses or something like that. So since you became an adult how has your roll in your holiday traditions changed?

That's a fun question!

I started hosting Christmas when I was about 30, after buying my first home. I didn't know at the time it would be a tradition to last, but it has. I cook a brunch and a massive dinner. For a while I had an open door- home for my family and friends who don't have family. But have downsized back to just my family, especially since my brother and his wife have started having children. ( I have a small house) My parents used to host, and they still like to, but don't want to do it on such a large scale so they host Christmas eve with a more simple meal and my daughter and I go over there for pre-party fun.

A tradition I miss from my younger years celebrating is cooking with my Grandmother. There were certain dishes I always made with her and, while I carry on the tradition of having those dishes, I sure do miss making them with her. However, I live in her house, well, it was her house, and every once in a while when I'm cooking one of her dishes, the light over the oven flickers on and off. It's wild.

[Blade]

As the stages of adult have changed my Christmas traditions have as well, as well as other holidays.

When I became stupid and got married Christmas drastically changed. From my little happy family to a month of going here and there and buying gifts for everyone on earth. Me of course being the events cooridinator, of where we go and what I take. Fixing dishes for 4 different events on my ex's side plus making sure the kids had something to open at each event. Then my family event as well. Finally freedom rang (divorce) and Christmas was at Mom's and I fixed a few of her favorites. About 8 yrs ago we started having Thanksgiving at LTB's house after she got married and started having little ones. I bring 3 items and let whoever wants them take them home so I don't have to eat on it all week.

I spent my early adult years making sure everyone was happy full and content and had all they wanted for Christmas. Now days I still buy for the kids but I'm more into doing things for those who are less fortunate than my family. I love having Christmas for 1 day.

I do miss being an unadult and spending Christmas Eve with my Dad's huge family and all of my 1st and 2nd cousins. My Aunt and Grandma fixed everything none of their adult children were ask to bring anything. Mom was talking about that the other day, saying looking back she felt guilty. I guess she doesn't understand, that is what they loved to do. Take care of and fix these huge meals for their family. Miss going to church Christmas Eve night as well. Was always very moving at the end, everyone carrying a lit candle and walking out to the live nativity scene.

[TempestuousFemme]

The one thing that I've discovered in my 40s is my give a shit button went away lol

[JDeere]

Originally Posted by TempestuousFemme

The one thing that I've discovered in my 40s is my give a shit button went away lol

Mine is starting to fade away...