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10-06-2015, 12:09 PM
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#581 |
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Senior Member
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Stonebutch Preferred Pronoun?:
she Relationship Status:
single 
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Old man
an old man in a nursing home is about to celebrate his 101 birthday so all his buddies show up to surprise him. They sneak him in a few things , have a good time talking about old times and deciede to leave. Oh says one of the guys, we have a gift for you, almost forgot. They open the door and in walks a vivacious blond wearing nothing but a smile . They turn and leave with a "have a nice time bud". She walks over to the birthday boy and says, "hey birthday boy I am here to give you super sex. The old man looks up at her and says honey, at my age, I'll take the soup............
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10-06-2015, 09:18 PM
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#582 |
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Senior Member
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lesbian butch Preferred Pronoun?:
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Single 
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Location: in a one horse town in a large state, in the U.S.
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ok ok here we go with a blonde joke......
2 blondes are driving down the highway going to go to Disneyland. Along the way they see a sign that says Disneyland left. So both girls starting crying and turned back around and started driving home.
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10-08-2015, 10:54 PM
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#583 | |
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Timed Out - TOS Drama
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I look in the mirror and it's me Preferred Pronoun?:
she her Relationship Status:
alert Join Date: Sep 2015
Location: not here.
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Quote:
They taste funny. 
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10-09-2015, 11:57 AM
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#584 |
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Senior Member
How Do You Identify?:
old-fashioned queer stone submissive girl Preferred Pronoun?:
mermaid, *very* lucky babygirl Relationship Status:
Saltwater mermaid ♡ 
Join Date: May 2010
Location: CA
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Thanked 6,103 Times in 1,727 Posts
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Why is the number 10 afraid of seven?
Because seven ate nine, and 10 is next.
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Be still when you have nothing to say; when genuine passion moves you, say what you've got to say, and say it hot. D. H. Lawrence 
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10-11-2015, 02:34 AM
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#585 |
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Junior Member
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butch Join Date: Mar 2015
Location: Vegas area
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This morning I was beaten up by a busty woman in an elevator.
I was staring at her ta-tas when she said, "please press one. " So I did. I don't remember much after that. |
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10-11-2015, 08:41 AM
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#586 |
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Member
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human Join Date: Mar 2014
Location: earth
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What happens if you eat yeast and shoe polish?
Every morning you'll rise and shine! |
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01-15-2016, 07:37 PM
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#587 |
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Member
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Valued Relationship Status:
UNO
Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Kansas
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Two Eskimos were sitting in a kayak and got quite chilly. One lit a fire in the craft, but of course it sank.
This proves that you can’t have your kayak and heat it, too. |
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01-22-2016, 08:30 AM
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#588 |
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Member
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OFOS Butch who desires femme company. Preferred Pronoun?:
Handsome devil you. 
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It was an emotional wedding....
Even the cake was in tiers.
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Hair Pulling...... not just for preschoolers. 
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02-19-2016, 12:05 PM
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#589 |
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Senior Member
How Do You Identify?:
old-fashioned queer stone submissive girl Preferred Pronoun?:
mermaid, *very* lucky babygirl Relationship Status:
Saltwater mermaid ♡
Join Date: May 2010
Location: CA
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Thanked 6,103 Times in 1,727 Posts
Rep Power: 21474854 |
What do you feed an invisible cat?
Evaporated Milk.
__________________
Be still when you have nothing to say; when genuine passion moves you, say what you've got to say, and say it hot. D. H. Lawrence
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02-25-2016, 10:46 AM
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#590 |
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Senior Member
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Location: Shenandoah Valley Virginia
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Q: What does a seal get from sitting on the ice too long at the zoo?
A: Polaroids! |
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02-28-2016, 09:12 AM
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#591 | |
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Senior Member
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So the client that inspired this thread was in the state hospital for nearly two years. She recently moved back to the group home and we have restarted our tradition of trading corny jokes. Here's the one she told me this week:
Q: What do you call an alligator wearing a vest? A: An investigator!  Quote:
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03-14-2016, 10:07 PM
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#592 |
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Junior Member
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butch Join Date: Mar 2015
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A blonde lady gets pulled over by a cop who is also blonde. The cop walks to the driver's window and says, "let me see your drivers license." The lady digs in her purse and can't find it. She asks the officer, "what does it look like? I'm not sure I have it." The cop responds, "it's a little square with your picture on it." The lady says, "oh. I have that." Then she pulls out her compact with the mirror and hands it to the cop. The cop looks at it and says, "I'm sorry. Why didn't you tell me you were a cop? You can go."
Hope this one wasn't already posted. 😀 |
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03-22-2016, 06:02 PM
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#593 |
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Member
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OFOS Butch who desires femme company. Preferred Pronoun?:
Handsome devil you.
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I tried to take some pictures of some fog.
I mist
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Hair Pulling...... not just for preschoolers.
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03-27-2016, 08:15 PM
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#594 |
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Senior Member
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Me, myself and I Join Date: Sep 2011
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Q. Why doesn't the Easter Bunny make noise when he has sex?
A. Because he has cotton balls. Q. What do you call a mischievous egg? A. A practical yolker Q. Why did the rabbit cross the road? A. It was the chicken's day off. Hoppy Easter everyone! |
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04-05-2016, 02:55 PM
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#595 |
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Member
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OFOS Butch who desires femme company. Preferred Pronoun?:
Handsome devil you.
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So a dyslexic man walks into a bra.
*Wanted to throw in some levity, the Presidential thread can be very emotional. Breathe.......
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Hair Pulling...... not just for preschoolers.
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04-05-2016, 05:25 PM
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#596 |
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Senior Member
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Stonebutch Preferred Pronoun?:
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two blonds
Two blonds were passing each other on opposite sides of the river when one calls out to the other "hey , how do I get to the other side". The other calls back "you're already there"
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04-05-2016, 05:28 PM
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#597 |
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Senior Member
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Colors
If a bag of oranges is a bunch of oranges and a bag of lemons are a bunch of lemons why aren't grapes a bunch of purples? (groan)
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04-05-2016, 05:58 PM
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#598 |
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Member
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Two antennas met on a roof, fell in love and got married.
The ceremony wasn't much, but the reception was excellent.
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I disapprove of what you say, but I will defend to the death your right to say it. - Evelyn B Hall |
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04-13-2016, 09:39 PM
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#599 |
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Senior Member
How Do You Identify?:
old-fashioned queer stone submissive girl Preferred Pronoun?:
mermaid, *very* lucky babygirl Relationship Status:
Saltwater mermaid ♡
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Knock, knock.
Who's there? Nobody. Nobody who? (Stay silent)
__________________
Be still when you have nothing to say; when genuine passion moves you, say what you've got to say, and say it hot. D. H. Lawrence
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04-14-2016, 01:04 PM
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#600 |
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Infamous Member
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Biological female. Lesbian. Relationship Status:
Happy Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Hanging out in the Atlantic.
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