Friendship Survey - Page 2

Ginger · 06-07-2012, 02:45 PM

I wasn't sure where to post this—I don't think of friendship as a "fluffy" topic,
and it doesn't really belong on the "lifestyles" shelf.
This seemed the best placement, if only by default.

This Friendship Survey is a departure from what is more often, on the site,
a focus on what kind of romantic or sexual partner we are and want.

Instead, the focus here is what kind of friend we are and want.

And who knows, in an indirect way, it might help people
hook up with each other. I know for me, the kind of friend a person is,
tells me what kind of partner she might be.

Of course, it's also just another excuse to talk about yourself.
Or to go off on one point that the survey triggers,
and ignore the rest.

(It's long—so feel free to just pick the items that "speak" to you.)

All good, IMO, as it builds reflection, and I for one,
need that right now.

Friendship Survey

Part 1 of 5: Logistic availability

1) How often do you see your friends in person?

2) How often do you talk on the phone, email, skype, etc. a friend?

3) Is childcare a consideration, when you’re making plans with a friend?

4) Are finances a consideration?

5) Is accessibility or health a consideration?

6) Is your work or class schedule a consideration?

7) Does last-minute planning figure into your friendships, either out of necessity or just because that’s the way you prefer it?

Part 2 of 5: Boundaries, expectations and values

1) What are your thoughts on butch/femme friendships?

2) If your partner didn’t like someone, would you still be friends with that person?

3) Describe a time someone cut you off as a friend.

4) Describe a time you cut someone off as a friend.

5) How would you respond, if you realized a friend had a substance abuse problem?

6) How would you respond, if your friend were in an abusive relationship?

7) If you began to have romantic feelings about your (partnered) friend, what would you do?

8) If you began to have romantic feelings about your (single) friend, what would you do?

9) If your friend had what you considered an annoying, albeit harmless habit, would you tell her?

10) Describe a time that you “outgrew” a friend, if applicable.

11) How many years have you known your oldest friend? How have you managed to stay friends, over time?

12) Do you have any friends who are exes? What’s your philosophy about that?

13) How do you feel about “friends with benefits”?

14) How do your expectations of a friend differ from your expectations of a romantic partner?

15) Describe a time when you really came through for a friend.

16) Describe a time a friend really came through for you.

17) What are a few deal breakers that would stop you being friends with someone?

18) What are the kinds of characters flaws you can overlook in a friend?

Part 3 of 5: How important is it to you that:

1) …your friend’s age is fairly close to yours?

2) …your friend’s educational level is similar to yours?

3) …your friend’s economic situation is similar to yours?

4) …your friend’s religious beliefs are similar to yours?

5) …your friend’s class background is similar to yours?

6) …your friend’s gender identity or sexual preference is similar to yours?

7) …your small or adult children like your friends?

8) …your friends like to include your children, when you hang out together?

Part 4 of 5: Which of the following shared activities with a friend appeal to you?

1) Attending singles events and supporting each other as you scan the environment for someone to flirt with, etc.

2) Exercising; outdoors or indoors

3) Watching movies or videos; at home or in a theater

4) Playing video or electronic games; at home or somewhere else

5) Attending sports events or watching sports on TV

6) Participating in team sports

7) Attending cultural events (museums, concerts, readings, etc.)

8) Shopping

9) Cooking, or eating in restaurants

10) Visiting wildlife centers, going to a county fair, hanging out to watch the dog run in an urban area, bird watching—anything that involves animals

11) Other

Part 5 of 5: What important things has this survey left out?

BONUS QUESTION: In your opinion, has the fact that this survey was created by a femme, affected it in any way?

06-07-2012, 02:45 PM	#1
Ginger Senior Member How Do You Identify?: Femme lesbian Join Date: Mar 2012 Location: East coast Posts: 2,416 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 5,829 Thanked 12,300 Times in 2,057 Posts Rep Power: 21474852	Friendship Survey I wasn't sure where to post this—I don't think of friendship as a "fluffy" topic, and it doesn't really belong on the "lifestyles" shelf. This seemed the best placement, if only by default. This Friendship Survey is a departure from what is more often, on the site, a focus on what kind of romantic or sexual partner we are and want. Instead, the focus here is what kind of friend we are and want. And who knows, in an indirect way, it might help people hook up with each other. I know for me, the kind of friend a person is, tells me what kind of partner she might be. Of course, it's also just another excuse to talk about yourself. Or to go off on one point that the survey triggers, and ignore the rest. (It's long—so feel free to just pick the items that "speak" to you.) All good, IMO, as it builds reflection, and I for one, need that right now. Friendship Survey Part 1 of 5: Logistic availability 1) How often do you see your friends in person? 2) How often do you talk on the phone, email, skype, etc. a friend? 3) Is childcare a consideration, when you’re making plans with a friend? 4) Are finances a consideration? 5) Is accessibility or health a consideration? 6) Is your work or class schedule a consideration? 7) Does last-minute planning figure into your friendships, either out of necessity or just because that’s the way you prefer it? Part 2 of 5: Boundaries, expectations and values 1) What are your thoughts on butch/femme friendships? 2) If your partner didn’t like someone, would you still be friends with that person? 3) Describe a time someone cut you off as a friend. 4) Describe a time you cut someone off as a friend. 5) How would you respond, if you realized a friend had a substance abuse problem? 6) How would you respond, if your friend were in an abusive relationship? 7) If you began to have romantic feelings about your (partnered) friend, what would you do? 8) If you began to have romantic feelings about your (single) friend, what would you do? 9) If your friend had what you considered an annoying, albeit harmless habit, would you tell her? 10) Describe a time that you “outgrew” a friend, if applicable. 11) How many years have you known your oldest friend? How have you managed to stay friends, over time? 12) Do you have any friends who are exes? What’s your philosophy about that? 13) How do you feel about “friends with benefits”? 14) How do your expectations of a friend differ from your expectations of a romantic partner? 15) Describe a time when you really came through for a friend. 16) Describe a time a friend really came through for you. 17) What are a few deal breakers that would stop you being friends with someone? 18) What are the kinds of characters flaws you can overlook in a friend? Part 3 of 5: How important is it to you that: 1) …your friend’s age is fairly close to yours? 2) …your friend’s educational level is similar to yours? 3) …your friend’s economic situation is similar to yours? 4) …your friend’s religious beliefs are similar to yours? 5) …your friend’s class background is similar to yours? 6) …your friend’s gender identity or sexual preference is similar to yours? 7) …your small or adult children like your friends? 8) …your friends like to include your children, when you hang out together? Part 4 of 5: Which of the following shared activities with a friend appeal to you? 1) Attending singles events and supporting each other as you scan the environment for someone to flirt with, etc. 2) Exercising; outdoors or indoors 3) Watching movies or videos; at home or in a theater 4) Playing video or electronic games; at home or somewhere else 5) Attending sports events or watching sports on TV 6) Participating in team sports 7) Attending cultural events (museums, concerts, readings, etc.) 8) Shopping 9) Cooking, or eating in restaurants 10) Visiting wildlife centers, going to a county fair, hanging out to watch the dog run in an urban area, bird watching—anything that involves animals 11) Other Part 5 of 5: What important things has this survey left out? BONUS QUESTION: In your opinion, has the fact that this survey was created by a femme, affected it in any way?