08-14-2012, 09:39 PM | #41 |
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i would never want to pack but if my butch wanted me to strap it on i would do it without hesitation...(She doesn't just for the record) in my eyes who is strapping, getting penetrated if anyone, penetrating, who is fucking who, on top , on bottom or hanging from the trapeze does NOT define butch or femme, top or bottom. Doing what feels good in the safety and comfort of that special person is what is right. No one can define that for you, not society and certainly not this website. |
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08-14-2012, 10:19 PM | #42 |
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"Lots of femmes pack! " (Maria)
It was a rhetorical question meant to open up the conversation! I find packing femmes hot! Elle*
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08-14-2012, 10:24 PM | #43 |
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No interest in packing by butch or femme.
Now I said packing, not strapping, to be clear and all.
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08-14-2012, 10:24 PM | #44 |
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09-09-2012, 01:17 PM | #45 |
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I do not pack, nor have I ever. I may be young, but I'm fully aware that I don't need to pack to know I am butch. I am just as much of one whether I pack or I don't. We all have things that make us who we are, and we are no more or less without said traits. So, does that make me less of a butch? no. not at all. We were made to be our own versions, not copies of another type. We're all still who we are. I'm still a young, dapper butch, without anything between my legs. I am me, and that's what counts.
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09-09-2012, 01:25 PM | #46 |
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If a butch I am seeing wants to soft pack, I say go for it. It's none of my business really. If she wants me to groove on it, it's going to be disappointing for her because I just don't. It doesn't do a thing for me.
I hear about femmes who scrape it with their nails and share that MOMENT, that acknowledgement of difference, and I think, wow, we are so not the same. Seriously. I love those moments of acknowledgement with butches or femmes. That frisson of recognition of who we are. That delicious exchange. But the softpack as a signifier of gender is not erotic for me. It is not a manifestation of masculinity that I find hot or even interesting. If someone were to wear it and not need me to interact with it in that way, then we'd be good. It wouldn't mean I didn't see them for who they are or that I wouldn't groove on their masculine presentation. |
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09-09-2012, 01:55 PM | #47 |
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As I have always said...packing or not packing doesn't matter to me. I will pack if the femme I am with wants me to, but I don't define me by an addition carried between my legs. I am just ME.
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09-09-2012, 02:14 PM | #48 |
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I pack
I pack on certain occasions depending on what I have plan for us. I love to pack when I go out dancing. I know femmes that love the feel while dancing.
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09-09-2012, 02:21 PM | #49 |
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When I think about it, that moment, reaching for someone -- it's a fun thing. All consensual, of course. Whether doing it slyly in public or not, it's a pleasure.
Just rubbing that high inner thigh in the car or anywhere. Yum. A soft pack, for me, means I won't be going there. There are things we do for the pleasure of our partners that don't do all that much for us. But to fake that I want to reach for her stuff when I don't, no, that would not work. Yet, I'd have to be busy or in a pretty pissy mood not to want to touch a partner between the legs if she wanted it. The softpack is, ironically, a cock block to me. I do not have any interest in it. If it's there, I am not likely to fondle her. |
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09-09-2012, 02:50 PM | #50 |
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My Butch does not pack, and until coming to the Butch-Femme site I had no idea that packing was something some Butches did. I don't judge a Butch by what's in their pants.
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09-09-2012, 04:48 PM | #51 |
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I only pack when I'm going to use it needless to say, it's not a soft pack.
Packing vs. non-packing is about personal preferences of the butch and has nothing to do with being butch enough or this or that kind of butch or whatever the hell people want to come up with. Yes, I've met femmes that pack and butches that do and do not pack all the time, some of the time, only on a Sunday <g>.... Rope-- |
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09-09-2012, 05:28 PM | #52 |
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Getting educated here.
I thought all Butches had to pack or strap on to be in "The Bois Club". Hummm,maybe not.
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09-09-2012, 05:41 PM | #53 |
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I know I spend alot of time in the butch c*ck thread, however that doesn't mean I have to be with someone who does - I accept my butch as they are, whether they pack or not
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09-09-2012, 05:42 PM | #54 |
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When I first came out to the big world other than a fue friends I was told by nearly everyone that if I didnt pack or strap it on I would never really be any kind of a butch.With that in mind I bought whatever it took to fill the toy bag...I spent mucho deniro....wow that good stuff aint cheep.That's been a long time ago,and to tell the truth untill I became a bfp planiteer I never felt I could ever not have or need to strap or pack to intrest anyone in the community.It dosent bother me to do either one way or the other..there is another thing I got from being hear that is being called her isnt a black ball word,I can stull be a big old butch jaust the same.I learn something reading these post that its ok to relax and be me without haveing to fix in a box that i'm expexted to be in.
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09-09-2012, 05:44 PM | #55 | |
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Quote:
I did pack for a few b-f gatherings, but never mainstream. I don't think I would pack again unless it was a turn-on for the femme. I don't mind packing, but it isn't something I need to do currently. |
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09-09-2012, 05:45 PM | #56 |
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I've never actually been with anyone who packs. My ex in San Diego used to think about it but never went shopping. And when I came out 20 years ago, I don't know that we knew much about it in New Zealand. Although, I'm sure there were plenty of butches who did think about it and tried doing it with socks etc.
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09-09-2012, 07:05 PM | #57 |
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09-09-2012, 07:09 PM | #58 |
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09-09-2012, 07:18 PM | #59 |
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i don't care what anyone else does in their pants, that's their beeswax, but for me i have learned along the way that i prefer not to simulate hetero sex. i always thought that's what B-F was, being with a *male* ID'd butch and having heteroish sex. Now i know different. We have an allotment of toys which are great fun, but without engaging in hetero-like sex. Not sure if that makes sense to anyone.
i am so happy that others are seeing they don't lose their butch card for not packing and not being a *he*.. and that a femme is still a femme no matter what her butch has in their pants, or doesn't have. |
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09-09-2012, 07:33 PM | #60 |
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Everyone has their thing and as long as everyone is having safe, happy consensual fun, let the good time roll!
No one should be judged, looked down upon, treated differently, looked at sideways for their kink or their self expression! Especially here. We already get that out there! This is our place to embrace, love and cherish our community of packers, non-packers, hys, shes, butches, femmes, whoever you are. It is you and you should be proud. It hurts that people in our community feel like they are not "butch enough" for not packing, or not in the "boys club". What is this? Since when is there a standard. I am confused. This reminds me of high school labels and it feels yucky.
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