Cancer Support and Caregivers Who Are Trail Blazers! - Page 36

JustJo · 03-21-2012, 04:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JustJo

Hello all

Mom got a stomach tube put in yesterday. The plus side is that it will replace the PIC line that has given her such problems and make it easier to clear the recurring blockages that she's getting...the down side is, well, that it's a stomach tube....so one more port, one more (minor) surgery, and one more thing that is depressing the hell out of her.

Ugh...so many things have been discussed that she and I BOTH got this wrong. It is a stomach tube, but it is located between the stomach and what's left of the small intestine, and is to control outgoing rather than incoming.

Evidently it will help them clear blockages, and also allow her to cirucumvent the intestine entirely (at will) when she is feeling discomfort.

So...now she is hooked up to 3 bags....TPN in through the PIC line, the original ostomy bag and now the new one....that I don't even know what to call.

Her TPN is increased to about 20 hours a day, and she will never be off of it.

She is feeling like a monster....with every step of food intake and digestion being controlled by valves and clamps and bags and needles.

On the plus side, this blockage was cleared and she is no longer having any pain.

The chemo will start later this week...since the latest scan shows that the liver lesions are now 11 mm and 8 mm, respectively....when they were so small they didn't even show on a scan a few months ago.

Heavenleahangel · 03-21-2012, 05:08 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by mustangjeano

This is great news. Thanks for sharing with us. I know Jacob will enjoy having his Mom feeling better. Jean

You are sooo right, Jean! I sat on the porch while Jacob rode his bike and he was happy as a little lark! The weather here has been wonderful! I officially can't put any weight on my foot in order for the bones to heal, but given the alternative of *dying*, I would say I am pretty darn blessed! Thank you everyone for the care, concern and best wishes. They really make me smile...

DapperButch · 03-21-2012, 05:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JustJo

Ugh...so many things have been discussed that she and I BOTH got this wrong. It is a stomach tube, but it is located between the stomach and what's left of the small intestine, and is to control outgoing rather than incoming.

Evidently it will help them clear blockages, and also allow her to cirucumvent the intestine entirely (at will) when she is feeling discomfort.

So...now she is hooked up to 3 bags....TPN in through the PIC line, the original ostomy bag and now the new one....that I don't even know what to call.

Her TPN is increased to about 20 hours a day, and she will never be off of it.

She is feeling like a monster....with every step of food intake and digestion being controlled by valves and clamps and bags and needles.
On the plus side, this blockage was cleared and she is no longer having any pain.

The chemo will start later this week...since the latest scan shows that the liver lesions are now 11 mm and 8 mm, respectively....when they were so small they didn't even show on a scan a few months ago.

Oh, Jo this so sucks. I feel so terrible for her.

It is this kind of stuff that worries me (about me). Yes, the CAT scan I had a month ago said there were no tumors. This was really meaningless to me due to the above. That is what my eating (most often successfully), vegan is all about. The hope is that eating in this way (plus doing some other things), will make my body less hospitable to cancer. The hope is that those small tumors don't grow. I am aware, however, that no matter what I do, it could still happen. Additionally, I am aware that there are people who have undetectable tumors that never grow no matter how they eat or what their lifestyle.

You remain in my thoughts, Jo.

JustJo · 03-21-2012, 05:16 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DapperButch

Oh, Jo this so sucks. I feel so terrible for her.

It is this kind of stuff that worries me (about me). Yes, the CAT scan I had a month ago said there were no tumors. This was really meaningless to me due to the above. That is what my eating (most often successfully), vegan is all about. The hope is that eating in this way (plus doing some other things), will make my body less hospitable to cancer. The hope is that those small tumors don't grow. I am aware, however, that no matter what I do, it could still happen. Additionally, I am aware that there are people who have undetectable tumors that never grow no matter how they eat or what their lifestyle.

You remain in my thoughts, Jo.

Thank you Dapper.

I completely hear what you're saying...and it's scary as hell.

The other part of the story though is that my mother has been a Crohn's patient for 50 years....lived on butter, bacon, and....when she was younger....Coke, donuts and chips.

She became nutrition conscious very late in life....and never took good, regular care of her Crohn's disease....starting and stopping medications randomly, skipping checkups and tests, even taking veternarian grade prednisone at one point for over a year because she was "sick of doctors."

As harsh as it sounds, I think she didn't help herself any. By contrast, you're taking the right steps...eating right, supplements, taking care of your health in general...and trust that will make a difference.

Hugs,
Jo

DapperButch · 03-21-2012, 05:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JustJo

Thank you Dapper.

I completely hear what you're saying...and it's scary as hell.

The other part of the story though is that my mother has been a Crohn's patient for 50 years....lived on butter, bacon, and....when she was younger....Coke, donuts and chips.

She became nutrition conscious very late in life....and never took good, regular care of her Crohn's disease....starting and stopping medications randomly, skipping checkups and tests, even taking veternarian grade prednisone at one point for over a year because she was "sick of doctors."

As harsh as it sounds, I think she didn't help herself any. By contrast, you're taking the right steps...eating right, supplements, taking care of your health in general...and trust that will make a difference.
Hugs,
Jo

Thanks for saying this, Jo. Recently, I have been struggling with seeing the usefulness of not eating the food (read: meat, cheese), that I love. You sharing the part of the story about your mom's tumors originally not showing up, only to show up later reminds me as to why I am doing this. Thank you.

(As an aside, I am aware that not everyone agrees with my belief that eating vegan+fish, helps fight/keep away cancer. No offense/disrespect meant to those who sees things differently.).

Leigh · 03-21-2012, 06:24 PM

I just wanted to show my support for everyone here; I've helped take care of 3 family members in the past who had cancer (all 3 died unfortunately) but I have seen and experienced how hard it can be to care for someone who is ill ~ I offer an ear to listen and a shoulder to lean on if anyone ever needs it :-)

midwest chick · 03-22-2012, 10:42 PM

Just a reminder: Please make sure that your younger family members are educated about gardasill, and the damage HPV can wreck--my niece, Meaganne, will be moving on from this world in the next 24-48 hours due to cervical cancer from HPV, she is 23 years old.

JustJo: I think the term you were looking for is gastric drain--it is frequently placed in the jejunum, but is sometimes placed in the stomach or duodenum. Placement in the areas below the stomach allow for drainage of bile salts, which can ease nausea, vomiting, and irritation.

clay · 03-22-2012, 10:57 PM

Just an update on the claybaby....saw my PCP Internist last week, who ordered a barrage of labs and stool for hemoccult. I have had malaise & fatigue for several weeks, all I want to do is sleep, taking frequent naps, and am exhausted just taking a shower. I am still losing weight, and my appetite sucks except for CRAVING avocados, asparagus, spinach, and Greek Yogurt. I could LIVE on all of those things...seriously...esp. the Greek Yogurt. I LOVE the honey one best of all.
My labs were all okay...except, my hgb. (hemoglobin), hct. (hematocrit), and MCHC are all low. My hgb. is 9.2 (was 11.2) My Transferritin is okay but the % sat. is low and B12 is way ow. SOOOOOO...I am now on a PreNatal Vitamin (these are high in iron) and are for pregnant ladies....grins. I KNEW it...my femme done knocked me up..so she says...I find that funny because I was menopausal and I had a complete hystero in December.....I am on a regimen of B12 shots every week for 4 weeks (3 to go) and then monthly for life my doc says..
I am due new scans and labs in May....with my surgical oncologist.
I am still just so very tired, I yawn frequently, and feel so sluggish. I know I had some major, major (double major abd sugeries) during the 6 hrs period in December...and am still re couping from it..but come on now..I hate feeling sluggish and tired all the time....
Anyway, just wanted to update all of you...
Jo...hugs to you and Rooster..and for your mom.
Take care everyone....my GF is coming to town tomorrow for the weekend, then I am going back to her place for a few days, and taking a few days to hang with my BFF who lives near my GF...I can't wait...I miss my BFF!!!I heart you all....hugs..Clay

clay · 03-22-2012, 10:59 PM

ohhh, Midwest, I am so very sorry. My GF & I send you a big hug and our wishes for energy and peace....Yes, you are correct..everyone needs to think about this for the younger generation...and consider the vaccine. Thanks for posting this.

Quote:

Originally Posted by midwest chick

Just a reminder: Please make sure that your younger family members are educated about gardasill, and the damage HPV can wreck--my niece, Meaganne, will be moving on from this world in the next 24-48 hours due to cervical cancer from HPV, she is 23 years old.

JustJo: I think the term you were looking for is gastric drain--it is frequently placed in the jejunum, but is sometimes placed in the stomach or duodenum. Placement in the areas below the stomach allow for drainage of bile salts, which can ease nausea, vomiting, and irritation.

midwest chick · 03-23-2012, 03:51 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by claybaby

ohhh, Midwest, I am so very sorry. My GF & I send you a big hug and our wishes for energy and peace....Yes, you are correct..everyone needs to think about this for the younger generation...and consider the vaccine. Thanks for posting this.

Thank you....gardasill is not administered to women over 30, so it's important to get the series prior to that...forgot to mention it earlier.

JustJo · 03-27-2012, 08:33 AM

I know you all have to be so sick of hearing from me

Yesterday evening I had a long talk with my mother, who was having a total meltdown. It was incredibly stressful trying to be there for her as she was raging and crying and scared and all of the other stuff that goes along with knowing your days are numbered and that you're in pain.

Anyway....trying to figure out next steps...and spoke to the doctor this morning. She has 2 months "if we're lucky." She cannot go home, period. She cannot eat food, period. She will have horrible pain from here on out and they will do their best to help control it, period.

Fuck.

They believe they can get her off the IV pain meds, which she is hitting every 15 minutes religiously, and onto oral and patches for pain. They believe they can get her strong enough to fly down to me.

And then it's on me, period.

I have a call in to hospice.

This also means I get to have my crazy, fucked up narcissist of a sister in my house so that she can say her "devoted daughter and where's my share of the loot?" goodbyes.

I am angry, upset and just feel sick myself.

So...welcome to 50. First task of the next half century....help your momma die.

Fuck.

mustangjeano · 03-27-2012, 02:14 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JustJo

I know you all have to be so sick of hearing from me

Yesterday evening I had a long talk with my mother, who was having a total meltdown. It was incredibly stressful trying to be there for her as she was raging and crying and scared and all of the other stuff that goes along with knowing your days are numbered and that you're in pain.

Anyway....trying to figure out next steps...and spoke to the doctor this morning. She has 2 months "if we're lucky." She cannot go home, period. She cannot eat food, period. She will have horrible pain from here on out and they will do their best to help control it, period.

Fuck.

They believe they can get her off the IV pain meds, which she is hitting every 15 minutes religiously, and onto oral and patches for pain. They believe they can get her strong enough to fly down to me.

And then it's on me, period.

I have a call in to hospice.

This also means I get to have my crazy, fucked up narcissist of a sister in my house so that she can say her "devoted daughter and where's my share of the loot?" goodbyes.

I am angry, upset and just feel sick myself.

So...welcome to 50. First task of the next half century....help your momma die.

Fuck.

Jo, my heart goes out to you and your Mom. I can certainly understand how she wants to stay in her home and not be dependant on anyone else but that just isn't an option at this point. I salute you for being willing to be there for her at this most difficult time and have her at home with you. This will probably be the toughest thing you have ever done and yet I bet that you will be glad that you were there for her. Keeping you all in my thoughts and prayers. Jean

DapperButch · 03-27-2012, 03:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JustJo

I know you all have to be so sick of hearing from me

Yesterday evening I had a long talk with my mother, who was having a total meltdown. It was incredibly stressful trying to be there for her as she was raging and crying and scared and all of the other stuff that goes along with knowing your days are numbered and that you're in pain.

Anyway....trying to figure out next steps...and spoke to the doctor this morning. She has 2 months "if we're lucky." She cannot go home, period. She cannot eat food, period. She will have horrible pain from here on out and they will do their best to help control it, period.

Fuck.

They believe they can get her off the IV pain meds, which she is hitting every 15 minutes religiously, and onto oral and patches for pain. They believe they can get her strong enough to fly down to me.

And then it's on me, period.

I have a call in to hospice.

This also means I get to have my crazy, fucked up narcissist of a sister in my house so that she can say her "devoted daughter and where's my share of the loot?" goodbyes.

I am angry, upset and just feel sick myself.

So...welcome to 50. First task of the next half century....help your momma die.

Fuck.

I'm very, very sorry, my friend. Know I will be thinking of you and I am around if you want to talk.

Tommi · 03-27-2012, 06:44 PM

Hey Jo,

Hope you are okay today. This is the crises we never see coming, and it drags, yet drowns out all sound and reality with the rush of knowing the outcome.

This time next year, the spring flowers will start to bloom , the color will come back into your landscape, and your Mom will not be hurting and suffering.

and ...as for your sister, the drama of her trauama will be different next year, and you can send her Birthday and Holiday cards, and not hear the Me Me Me what about wonderful me.

Well, if you want to get away to Disneyland , just call.

Keep us posted Jo

clay · 04-01-2012, 09:43 PM

Jo:
Please know Miss Scarlett * I are holding you & mom, Rooster, & Snack...close in our hearts..and we send you white light energies and peace...and we walk this journey with you, in spirit!!

Having walked this one in 1998 for 3 months with my own mom, I can empathize with you..on so many levels...and no words, nothing can ever prepare one for this kind of journey...BUT somewhere, deep down, inside, are some incredibly amazing "reserves" of strength, patience, understanding, and peace that will come to you when you need them most!! Believe in this journey that there is some amazing bonding that will occur..and the time spent will be priceless..

What helped me most was I was holding my mom, whispering in her ear, giving her permission to go when she was ready, assuring her I would be okay, and to ascend when she was ready to go...as most folks do when they are transcending! The beauty for me was that I came into this world in her arms, and she left this world in mine.....a full circle we shared...completely rounded...and THAT is where my peace came from..we began and ended in one another's arms....and we saw archangel Michael just before she transcended, so he helped her to transition.

My mom was diagnosed with stage IV liver/lung/bone cancer..she lived 3 months! I lived in her home and gave her every detail of her care 24/7as she had asked for me...I was a Nurse for 21 years!!

Anyway, this is about YOU and your heart now...I am with you, Jo..my friend!!! May you, Rooster, and Snack be ever closer and know Miss Scarlett & I send you much love, prayers, and support!! Hug your mom also.... Clay

Quote:

Originally Posted by JustJo

I know you all have to be so sick of hearing from me

Yesterday evening I had a long talk with my mother, who was having a total meltdown. It was incredibly stressful trying to be there for her as she was raging and crying and scared and all of the other stuff that goes along with knowing your days are numbered and that you're in pain.

Anyway....trying to figure out next steps...and spoke to the doctor this morning. She has 2 months "if we're lucky." She cannot go home, period. She cannot eat food, period. She will have horrible pain from here on out and they will do their best to help control it, period.

Fuck.

They believe they can get her off the IV pain meds, which she is hitting every 15 minutes religiously, and onto oral and patches for pain. They believe they can get her strong enough to fly down to me.

And then it's on me, period.

I have a call in to hospice.

This also means I get to have my crazy, fucked up narcissist of a sister in my house so that she can say her "devoted daughter and where's my share of the loot?" goodbyes.

I am angry, upset and just feel sick myself.

So...welcome to 50. First task of the next half century....help your momma die.

Fuck.

SweetJane · 04-01-2012, 10:26 PM

JustJo,
This is tough. I had to do that with my mother when I was 21. I went home to take care of some of her needs and missed her passing. She had wanted someone to be there and I wasn't. I carried that guilt for a long time.

Be with your momma while you can. Be strong for her.

When it is done, you can have your own meltdown.

Know that we will be here for you through it all.

Our prayers are with you.

Miss Scarlett · 04-02-2012, 04:14 AM

(((((Jo))))) Honey, i am so sorry to read this...yes, i've been there too and i wish i had some magic words to make this easier for you...

my Mom died from Pancreatic Cancer in 2007, She never talked with me about what she was feeling...this haunted me earlier this year...i think she was trying to avoid a similar meltdown to the one your mom had. Still not knowing how she was feeling bothered me. No one understands how this feels until they've walked this painful and frightening path...

There was nothing that could be done for Mom and i felt so helpless. She made me promise i'd help her die if she ever got to the point where she couldn't take it any more. Hospice was simply amazing for us and i hope they will be the same for your mom.

And NO i am certainly NOT sick of hearing you post about your mom...you have to talk about this...and i'm here if you need a shoulder or an ear...

Like Clay said, we're holding you close...sending much love, light, energy and prayers to you, your mom, your family and Snack...

Quote:

Originally Posted by JustJo

I know you all have to be so sick of hearing from me

Yesterday evening I had a long talk with my mother, who was having a total meltdown. It was incredibly stressful trying to be there for her as she was raging and crying and scared and all of the other stuff that goes along with knowing your days are numbered and that you're in pain.

Anyway....trying to figure out next steps...and spoke to the doctor this morning. She has 2 months "if we're lucky." She cannot go home, period. She cannot eat food, period. She will have horrible pain from here on out and they will do their best to help control it, period.

Fuck.

They believe they can get her off the IV pain meds, which she is hitting every 15 minutes religiously, and onto oral and patches for pain. They believe they can get her strong enough to fly down to me.

And then it's on me, period.

I have a call in to hospice.

This also means I get to have my crazy, fucked up narcissist of a sister in my house so that she can say her "devoted daughter and where's my share of the loot?" goodbyes.

I am angry, upset and just feel sick myself.

So...welcome to 50. First task of the next half century....help your momma die.

Fuck.

JustJo · 04-02-2012, 08:21 PM

Thank you so much everyone.

Mom will not be able to go home with hospice care after all. The hospital room has been blocked to all but family, her roommate has been moved, and my sister is spending the night in the other bed for tonight.

They have basically said their goodbyes....mom knows her affairs are all in order....and she is leaving us very soon.

I have believed for some weeks that she was holding on for two things....to have decisions resolved and confirmed about her things and her property....and to see my sister.

Both of those have been accomplished....and now we wait.

socialjustice_fsu · 04-02-2012, 08:38 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JustJo

I know you all have to be so sick of hearing from me

Yesterday evening I had a long talk with my mother, who was having a total meltdown. It was incredibly stressful trying to be there for her as she was raging and crying and scared and all of the other stuff that goes along with knowing your days are numbered and that you're in pain.

Anyway....trying to figure out next steps...and spoke to the doctor this morning. She has 2 months "if we're lucky." She cannot go home, period. She cannot eat food, period. She will have horrible pain from here on out and they will do their best to help control it, period.

Fuck.

They believe they can get her off the IV pain meds, which she is hitting every 15 minutes religiously, and onto oral and patches for pain. They believe they can get her strong enough to fly down to me.

And then it's on me, period.

I have a call in to hospice.

This also means I get to have my crazy, fucked up narcissist of a sister in my house so that she can say her "devoted daughter and where's my share of the loot?" goodbyes.

I am angry, upset and just feel sick myself.

So...welcome to 50. First task of the next half century....help your momma die.

Fuck.

Precious Jo,

I wanted to echo what so many other wise and kind folks have said to you. Calling in hospice is an excellent move. They will get the pain under control and the team will likely even offer to help you deal with your sister if you ask the social worker about this. Reach out. These are highly trained people. Embrace them and let them rally around YOU.

Choose your battles wisely. Do what you feel you need to do. Let 'us' surround you with love and validation.There are 5 universal statements that might help ease your mothers transition and your acceptance of what is to come. They are, "I forgive you." "Will you forgive me?" "Thank you." "I love you." And, "Goodbye." Next year at this time the robins and this glorious spring shall return. Your life will look different from what it is now. It is all transient.

I hold you close to my heart and, in spirit, will walk beside you. Blessings and peace to you, your mom, your family and Snack.

Namaste.

Tamara

Tommi · 04-02-2012, 09:58 PM

JustJo,

I am so glad you and Rooster have had quality time with your Mom in Florida. You worried so much about her, and I know this waiting is the hardest thing to go through.

We will be here and write when you can, as much as you can. You and yours are in our thoughts.

03-22-2012, 10:57 PM	#708
clay Practically Lives Here How Do You Identify?: Butch (Silver Fox) Dom Daddi Preferred Pronoun?: 50 Shades of Clay Darker & Deeper Relationship Status: married to my forever Join Date: May 2011 Location: salt air & sandy beaches Posts: 13,106 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 96,179 Thanked 31,709 Times in 7,724 Posts Rep Power: 21474863	UPDATE Just an update on the claybaby....saw my PCP Internist last week, who ordered a barrage of labs and stool for hemoccult. I have had malaise & fatigue for several weeks, all I want to do is sleep, taking frequent naps, and am exhausted just taking a shower. I am still losing weight, and my appetite sucks except for CRAVING avocados, asparagus, spinach, and Greek Yogurt. I could LIVE on all of those things...seriously...esp. the Greek Yogurt. I LOVE the honey one best of all. My labs were all okay...except, my hgb. (hemoglobin), hct. (hematocrit), and MCHC are all low. My hgb. is 9.2 (was 11.2) My Transferritin is okay but the % sat. is low and B12 is way ow. SOOOOOO...I am now on a PreNatal Vitamin (these are high in iron) and are for pregnant ladies....grins. I KNEW it...my femme done knocked me up..so she says...I find that funny because I was menopausal and I had a complete hystero in December.....I am on a regimen of B12 shots every week for 4 weeks (3 to go) and then monthly for life my doc says.. I am due new scans and labs in May....with my surgical oncologist. I am still just so very tired, I yawn frequently, and feel so sluggish. I know I had some major, major (double major abd sugeries) during the 6 hrs period in December...and am still re couping from it..but come on now..I hate feeling sluggish and tired all the time.... Anyway, just wanted to update all of you... Jo...hugs to you and Rooster..and for your mom. Take care everyone....my GF is coming to town tomorrow for the weekend, then I am going back to her place for a few days, and taking a few days to hang with my BFF who lives near my GF...I can't wait...I miss my BFF!!!I heart you all....hugs..Clay __________________ To find someone who will love you for no reason, and to shower that person with reasons, that is the ultimate happiness. ~Robert Brault

03-27-2012, 08:33 AM	#711
JustJo Infamous Member How Do You Identify?: pushy broad Preferred Pronoun?: she Relationship Status: Follow your heart; it knows things your mind cannot explain. Join Date: Jan 2010 Location: Southeast corner Posts: 5,633 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 24,417 Thanked 25,407 Times in 4,661 Posts Rep Power: 21474856	I know you all have to be so sick of hearing from me Yesterday evening I had a long talk with my mother, who was having a total meltdown. It was incredibly stressful trying to be there for her as she was raging and crying and scared and all of the other stuff that goes along with knowing your days are numbered and that you're in pain. Anyway....trying to figure out next steps...and spoke to the doctor this morning. She has 2 months "if we're lucky." She cannot go home, period. She cannot eat food, period. She will have horrible pain from here on out and they will do their best to help control it, period. Fuck. They believe they can get her off the IV pain meds, which she is hitting every 15 minutes religiously, and onto oral and patches for pain. They believe they can get her strong enough to fly down to me. And then it's on me, period. I have a call in to hospice. This also means I get to have my crazy, fucked up narcissist of a sister in my house so that she can say her "devoted daughter and where's my share of the loot?" goodbyes. I am angry, upset and just feel sick myself. So...welcome to 50. First task of the next half century....help your momma die. Fuck. __________________ I'm not tall enough to ride emotional roller coasters

03-27-2012, 06:44 PM	#714
Tommi Infamous Member How Do You Identify?: Usually "Hello" Relationship Status: Married and Bound to Tommi's kaijira (Ts_kaijira ) Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Suthun.... California that is. Across the ridge from Laguna Beach. Posts: 8,151 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 13,621 Thanked 21,337 Times in 5,968 Posts Rep Power: 21474859	Peace to you Jo Hey Jo, Hope you are okay today. This is the crises we never see coming, and it drags, yet drowns out all sound and reality with the rush of knowing the outcome. This time next year, the spring flowers will start to bloom , the color will come back into your landscape, and your Mom will not be hurting and suffering. and ...as for your sister, the drama of her trauama will be different next year, and you can send her Birthday and Holiday cards, and not hear the Me Me Me what about wonderful me. Well, if you want to get away to Disneyland , just call. Keep us posted Jo

04-02-2012, 08:21 PM	#718
JustJo Infamous Member How Do You Identify?: pushy broad Preferred Pronoun?: she Relationship Status: Follow your heart; it knows things your mind cannot explain. Join Date: Jan 2010 Location: Southeast corner Posts: 5,633 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 24,417 Thanked 25,407 Times in 4,661 Posts Rep Power: 21474856	Thank you so much everyone. Mom will not be able to go home with hospice care after all. The hospital room has been blocked to all but family, her roommate has been moved, and my sister is spending the night in the other bed for tonight. They have basically said their goodbyes....mom knows her affairs are all in order....and she is leaving us very soon. I have believed for some weeks that she was holding on for two things....to have decisions resolved and confirmed about her things and her property....and to see my sister. Both of those have been accomplished....and now we wait. __________________ I'm not tall enough to ride emotional roller coasters

03-21-2012, 06:24 PM	#706
Leigh Infamous Member How Do You Identify?: Femme Preferred Pronoun?: She, Her, etc Relationship Status: Single Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Canada Posts: 7,767 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 9,029 Thanked 13,026 Times in 4,786 Posts Rep Power: 21474858	I just wanted to show my support for everyone here; I've helped take care of 3 family members in the past who had cancer (all 3 died unfortunately) but I have seen and experienced how hard it can be to care for someone who is ill ~ I offer an ear to listen and a shoulder to lean on if anyone ever needs it :-)

03-22-2012, 10:42 PM	#707
midwest chick Member How Do You Identify?: femme Relationship Status: married Join Date: Nov 2011 Location: here. Posts: 398 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 5,201 Thanked 1,678 Times in 338 Posts Rep Power: 21474849	Just a reminder: Please make sure that your younger family members are educated about gardasill, and the damage HPV can wreck--my niece, Meaganne, will be moving on from this world in the next 24-48 hours due to cervical cancer from HPV, she is 23 years old. JustJo: I think the term you were looking for is gastric drain--it is frequently placed in the jejunum, but is sometimes placed in the stomach or duodenum. Placement in the areas below the stomach allow for drainage of bile salts, which can ease nausea, vomiting, and irritation.

04-01-2012, 10:26 PM	#716
SweetJane Member How Do You Identify?: stone femme Preferred Pronoun?: she Relationship Status: always solo Join Date: Sep 2011 Location: New Mexico Posts: 368 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 380 Thanked 815 Times in 198 Posts Rep Power: 4309956	JustJo, This is tough. I had to do that with my mother when I was 21. I went home to take care of some of her needs and missed her passing. She had wanted someone to be there and I wasn't. I carried that guilt for a long time. Be with your momma while you can. Be strong for her. When it is done, you can have your own meltdown. Know that we will be here for you through it all. Our prayers are with you.

04-02-2012, 09:58 PM	#720
Tommi Infamous Member How Do You Identify?: Usually "Hello" Relationship Status: Married and Bound to Tommi's kaijira (Ts_kaijira ) Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Suthun.... California that is. Across the ridge from Laguna Beach. Posts: 8,151 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 13,621 Thanked 21,337 Times in 5,968 Posts Rep Power: 21474859	JustJo, I am so glad you and Rooster have had quality time with your Mom in Florida. You worried so much about her, and I know this waiting is the hardest thing to go through. We will be here and write when you can, as much as you can. You and yours are in our thoughts.