Femmes: what makes you feel sexy?

[Gemme]

Originally Posted by deeds

curtsy..lol

I won't come in here anymore.. I appreciate, understand and respect a Femme who keeps sacred and private places with themselves..tho I wanna know what turns her on so I can be all that and more for her in private places...

But this isn't a 'what turns you on' thread. Feeling sexy or confident with one's body really has nothing to do with anyone but that person, in most cases. It's the feeling of satin on her skin or the smell of her favorite perfume or doing something that may be ordinary but it's just for her so that makes it special. It's not about sex, necessarily. One can feel sexy without having sex or feeling the need to do so.

There are 'what turns you on' threads on the site if you search for them but if you are that interested in someone, why not ask that person? The things that turns one person on is a turn off for the next.

[Gemme]

Originally Posted by fatallyblonde

Starting my first new thread :nervous:

anyway, I am interested, my fellow femmes, in what makes you feel sexy. Not in a general sort of way... but what you find helps you come back to yourself when you feel run down, or frumpy, or rejected or out of touch (or all of the above!)... how do you get back to a feeling of sensuality and sexiness that gives you a morale boost and makes you feel strong once more?

For me, I find if I take the time to set my hair in curlers and then do a nice brush out, this really gives me a massive boost. My hair looks good, which means I feel a lot better about how I look and that gives me confidence. Without styling my hair really doesn't do anything and a lot of my self-esteem is attached to being well-presented so even just doing my hair can make me feel a lot more in control and therefore a lot more confident.

Another thing is, if I am really run down and stressed out and exhausted and don't feel like my body is properly mine anymore, if I can afford it I go and get an hour or two hour full body massage. Having my aches and pains soothed away and being coaxed into reconnecting with my physical self through touch really is restorative for me and again, it gives me confidence that makes me feel present in my body and that makes me feel sexy.

Of course, it isn't necessary or important to feel sexy all the time... sometimes I just want to slob around in my pajamas with a cup of tea and be a quiet little recluse and that, in its own way, can be just as restorative and soothing to me as feeling like a bombshell does.

What works for you?

For those who aren't sure, this is the OP's intention and desire for the thread.

[deeds]

Originally Posted by Gemme

For those who aren't sure, this is the OP's intention and desire for the thread.

*putting on my dress and hiking up my skirt*sneaking in..again..
I believe I understand you Gemme I do agree wholeheartedly that it is about you feeling sexy for and within your own body..This is not the "what turns me on thread"
And that's good advice if interested in someone just ask them,precisely because of femme uniqueness,but that could open up a whole new thread in and of itself.

[Sweet Bliss]

I don't mind if peeps other than Femme's read the posts, but this is a thread exclusively for Femme discussion, not the general public.

I think some folks just can't resist making comments about topics that don't pertain to them. Reading the first original post will tell us who the OP is addressing. Since this is a very personal and sometimes painful journey back to ourselves, I think I will refrain from posting in here about my journey back to wholeness.

It's not a lark or instructions on how to get a Femme's attention or get into her head so it will turn on "command". This is an example of how to piss me off when I'm exposing my vulnerable side in public. So not happening. Great question. It's a journey, a process, and for each Femme, unique. Be nice if we had Femme Sacred Centers to retreat to when we are raw and exposed. Fully funded and covered by insurance, lol. We could call it Sisters Inc.

[Medusa]

That thing where I'm making dinner, hair knotted up in a messy bun on top of my head, pots bubbling and steaming and I feel this presence behind me.

Maybe there are hands on my waist and hot breath on the back of my neck as I feel his inhale and the hairs on my neck stand at attention. Or maybe it's a quick kiss on the cheek or pat on the ass as he passes by to take the garbage out.

The affirmation of my way of being is sexy and if that is happening while I'm in the service of food prep (or any random home-making activity, really), it lets me know he is seeing me in my element and loving it. That's fucking sexy to be desired while doing what you love.

<3

[MsTinkerbelly]

I'm 55 and not in great health...so most days I struggle to even care what I look like when I leave the house.

What makes me feel sexy...that stretch your body, love the skin you're in feeling? I think the closest I come to that feeling is after I shower, shave, lotion and put on something soft and pretty. I know my Kasey likes that I smell yummy and feel good, but it's really for me.

[Soft*Silver]

Like Tinkerbelly, I am almost 60 (on Jan 15th), have had several major surgeries in the last few years and deal with chronic acute pain every day. I struggle to feel sexy. I try at best to feel good. However, my husband certainly has ways to help ease me into the sexy zone. And like Medusa said, it is the moments stolen out of context of the situation, that claws away the pain and allows me moments of femmeness once again.

My favorite is when he comes home from work(he works midnites) and steals in next to me and wakes me slowly to his hands over me, gently touching but Touching. I do not wake to pain. I wake to Him. I love that he helps me forgets, has found a way to get me back in my skin without pain, and feel my womanness.

[Kätzchen]

When ever my Sweetheart tells me "Whatever you want, baby" I feel so loved, so understood, and terribly sexy. When I recently made an Salted Caramel Apple pie, it was late at night and we were both hanging out in the kitchen, I fed him a spoon of the pie, and the look he gave me, while feeding him, just melted my heart and made me feel so sexy....

[Wh1ms1]

Hi. My name is Wh1ms1, I am a 54 yo femme. I have been a nurse and a massage therapist.
When I want to feel sexy I pamper myself. I talk a long hot bath with scented epsom salts. Aka magnesium sulfate. Magnesium is vital for the body and is best absorbed through the skin. It is a mild euphoric, helps relieve anxiety, tension, and pain. Oh, and it is a natural antidepressant.0 Then I use my favorite scented lotion, powder, and perfume. It always makes me feel sensual...like a tigress on the prowl...I also like to be clean shaven, soft, and smooth. I put on make up, and I too love to play with make up. It is an art form. Then I like to choose something lacy and sexy to wear under and something lacy and feminine over. I pick the jewelry that best matches my outfit for the day...and voila'! I am ready to go out and dance my heart out.

[Wh1ms1]

Hmmm...reading down...I see a lot of replies about your butch's reaction to you. I would have to look back...ok, wayyy back...in my memory to pull up one of those. Lol. It always made me feel sexy when my butch's eyes would go a little wide and light up when I made an appearance all dressed up. It made me feel sexy when they would put a warm hand on my back...or possibly a bit lower if we were in private. Simple courtesies never failed to make my heart stutter a bit, but I think what really made me feel special is when he/she (I like trans men as well) would do something or say something or give me something that showed they had spent time actually thinking about who I am and what I like. I'm not talking about expensive things. One of my lovers gave me a little book to write poetry in. I am still finding notes that she wrote to me, throughout the book. It still makes me feel special, even though we parted ways long ago. Because for that period of time she truly loved me and knew who I was.

[girl_dee]

my big fat juicy brain makes me feel sexy.

[candy_coated_bitch]

Wearing my bralette around the house with just a cardigan.

[introverted1]

Boots...really hot and sexy boots.

[Medusa]

I've always felt so sexy when I am luxuriating in my "get ready" process.

The extra-long soak in the tub where you exfoliate your entire body, shave and moisturize until your skin is buttery smooth, and take extra time bathing with luscious bath oils and candles. Then you step out and apply all manner of creams, lotions, and (LIGHT!) scent and slip into your silkiest unmentionables (or none!) before brushing out your hair and painting your face with your darkest of kohl eyeliner and your signature red lipstick.

Maybe you are burning a candle and playing sultry jazz in the background but your mind is on your lover and all manner of touching and kissing and caressing. I love taking extra time to choose clothing that highlights my hourglass shape and shoes that allow me a little extra firmness in my gams because I *know* he loves to watch my legs when I walk in heels.

At the end of the process of primping and preening, I always feel so tingly with excitement at how pleased my lover will be. But also? I love doing it for myself just as much. I love the anticipation and the buzz I get from the service of "put on your most beautiful self".

It's a happy place.

[girl_dee]

i have been thinking about this thread, its so super delicious. i do feel that this question is not for me, as i don't feel sexy is what i am.

Gosh i <3 all of you.

i realize that i do not think of myself as sexy at all. i DO think all of you are. Each one for different reasons. i love hearing about your sexy self.

i don't really *do* makeup very often. (is Burt's bees lip balm make up? It IS tinted), i don't do heels, lingerie or anything like it. Give me a white crew neck Tee to sleep in and i am in my comfy place (maybe that is sexy in itself?)

But if i did have to reach for something i would say when when my energy is confidence, assertiveness, boldness, almost to the point of cockiness, ..... in my favorite Levis, and leather clogs, on a low humidity day (BIG hair)

Femme Swagger.

[Gemme]

Originally Posted by girl_dee

i have been thinking about this thread, its so super delicious. i do feel that this question is not for me, as i don't feel sexy is what i am.

Gosh i <3 all of you.

i realize that i do not think of myself as sexy at all. i DO think all of you are. Each one for different reasons. i love hearing about your sexy self.

i don't really *do* makeup very often. (is Burt's bees lip balm make up? It IS tinted), i don't do heels, lingerie or anything like it. Give me a white crew neck Tee to sleep in and i am in my comfy place (maybe that is sexy in itself?)

I disagree, dee. I do think you have sex appeal and I think it's absolutely sexy for you to be comfy in your white tee. I actually like that look for us girls anyway.

But if i did have to reach for something i would say when when my energy is confidence, assertiveness, boldness, almost to the point of cockiness, ..... in my favorite Levis, and leather clogs, on a low humidity day (BIG hair)

Femme Swagger.

Ooooh, Levis. See? That's exactly what we mean and is most definitely femme swagger! Good on you!

[Gemme]

The day's certainly nowhere near over but I can tell you that I felt extraordinarily sexy when I left the gym this morning. My hair was up in a bun, I was sweaty and my face red but damn, did I feel good. Confident, strong and totally capable of kicking ass. When I feel those things, I am sexy.

[Gayandgray]

Like MsTinkerbelly and Soft*Silver, my spouse is not in good health at all. She is 74 and struggles everyday just to get up and do basic tasks. I'm going to be 48 in June and I'm so busy working fulltime and caring for her that I have pretty much forgotten how to feel sexy! I used to be very feminine when we first got together, always all made up, nails done, super ladies my hair, etc. yet I always had my tomboy side. Ever since my butch became disabled it seems like the feminine side of me sort of slipped into the background. Here lately though, I'm trying to get more in touch with my inner femme.
I've lost a little weight and I now feel sexy when I'm fresh from the shower, lotioned up, smelling lightly of coconut, wearing a teeshirt dress around the house. Or when I paint my toenails a baby pink or baby blue and my hair is up in a ridiculously high messy bun. Then I feel very sexy.

[Medusa]

Sometimes it's my own bedhead that does it for me!

Padding to the coffeepot in bare feet with my ever-present red toes and that crazy mass of red hair billowing all huge and wild and wavy, I feel really sexy yawning and stretching the sleep away and greeting the day as a ferocious and wildly-satisfied thing.

I guess you could say that satisfying sleep (even if short) and bedhead are a sexy feeling!

[Soft*Silver]

you know...feeling powerful IS amazingly sexy for me. When I would ride my 1200 lb mare and she was all full of herself and yet listened to ME, and the sweat on the inside of my thighs against the saddle warmed me, and the sweat coming down off my helmet burnt my raw cheeks, DAMN I felt sexy. When I would slide off her, and feel the thud of my boots hit the ground and she would bow her head and rub against me, DAMN I felt sexy.

Its all in feeling in control of your own power...I do love that feeling

Originally Posted by Gemme

The day's certainly nowhere near over but I can tell you that I felt extraordinarily sexy when I left the gym this morning. My hair was up in a bun, I was sweaty and my face red but damn, did I feel good. Confident, strong and totally capable of kicking ass. When I feel those things, I am sexy.