01-09-2011, 09:17 PM | #101 |
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Me: Hey, honey! They found a 112 year old ship in Michigan.
Ebon: Oh, hey! Was it Noah's Arc? Me: No, smartass. It's the L.R. Doty. Ebon: Uh huh. Me: *reads from the article* It's been perfectly preserved by the cold water. And was the largest wooden vessel to not be accounted for. Ebon: Yeah. Didn't they think to look in the water before now? Me: *swats at him* Me: Did you know that there's a Wisconsin Underwater Archaeology Association? Ebon: Wow! Me: No, actually, it's WUAA. *over-pronounces it* Ebon: |
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01-10-2011, 03:53 AM | #102 |
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My mantras for 2011 -
"I can't fix stupid." "My money is on crazy." |
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01-10-2011, 08:47 AM | #103 |
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conversation about me having made coffee yesterday
me..I aint a good coffee maker sweet..it's easy just read the bag me...I did it said 1 tablespoon sweet...teaspoon me...no says tablespoon...how bout you go make us some good coffee sweet...grumbling something as she went to trump me on the tablespoon vs teaspoon Moments later sweet...CALEB sweet...CALEB YOU USED THE WHOLE BAG OF COFFEE FOR ONE POT? me...cracking up no I didn't sweet...well the bag is empty.... me...
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01-11-2011, 05:02 PM | #104 |
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Damon as He's going in the kitchen to make cookies-
Him- want me to make you some cookies? me- will you make both kinds? Him- was gonna Him fumbling around in cabinet Him- I can't make these cookies dammit! me-oh good gravy- why not? Him- cuz we ain't got no eggs me- it needs eggs?? I thought it came with all that? Him- uh, nooooo- it doesn't me- who knew? Him- well I guess I'll brave the ice and go to the store tomorrow and buy cookies!
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01-11-2011, 05:30 PM | #105 | |
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Grin.. My mom and dad actually are cousins... hehe BUT they didn't become cousins until mom was three and dad was one, so I don't think it counts...
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01-12-2011, 10:27 AM | #106 |
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After having introduced a friend to The Big Bang Theory…….. Deb: OMG, Sheldon reminds me so much of you! Kobi: huh? Deb: Sheldon is you! Kobi: Sorry, I still don’t get it. Deb: People, except for the inner core, seldom know what Sheldon is saying. How often do people say to you…you are speaking in tongues again? You both have an uncanny ability to be devoid of expression regardless of the situation. Sheldon sees the world in formulas and probabilities. You see it in behavior patterns and human nature. You both can dish out the funniest sarcasm but when done to you, you haven’t a clue. Kobi: *trying to decide if I am supposed to feel insulted or uplifted* Deb: Sheldon dresses better tho. Kobi: * me picturing Sheldon* Ok I’m quite sure that was meant to be a dig. Deb: *giving hug* But I love your uniqueness. Kobi: * Sighs. Has no freakin clue what just happened.*
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01-12-2011, 08:48 PM | #107 |
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Fur real....
Two men answered my ad on freecycle about the (semi-creepy) shed I want to vanish from the back yard (and yes, Scoote agreed )
Unfortunately, it was already getting dark when they showed up...and Scoote was at work. So there I am, in the back yard, in the semi-dark, with two strange men. I do not particularly care for this. Shadow (our mini-dachshund), trots out....barks twice. Man #1: Hi puppy Shadow barks once more, then runs for the doggy door, looking over his shoulder as he goes. Great watch dog. Conversation and shed inspection continues. Banshee (our boy kitty who is the size of a small pony) approaches. Me: Hi Banshee boo boo Banshee: Meow...and starts to purr Man #2 (stepping out of the shed): Hi kitty Banshee hisses, snarls, puffs his tail up and starts to walk stiff-legged towards both men. Man #1: Dammmmnnnnnn.....you don't need a dog with a cat like that.
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01-13-2011, 06:19 PM | #108 |
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Miss Pink likes to sleep with a fan on for the noise, but I don't like it blowing on me while we sleep....so we compromise...
Miss Pink: "I have the fan on but it's not blowing on the bed" Me: "Oh that's great, that'll work" Miss Pink: "What we really need in here is a noise machine" Me: (grinning into her hair as we snuggle) "We have one,it's name is Pinky" Miss Pink: "Fucker"
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01-14-2011, 11:39 PM | #109 |
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In a discussion about issues with my job..
Ebon: Have you started looking for another job?
Me: No. It took me so long to find this one and I don't like job humping. Both: Me: Uh, I mean job hopping. I'm going to bed now. Ebon: Might be a good idea. |
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01-15-2011, 12:14 PM | #110 |
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Me to Sweet..
Me..want me to fix you something to eat? Sweet...no, I'll get something in a bit Me..ok, I don't mind hour later I walk in the kitchen Sweet is cooking her breakfast Me...I'da done that for you Sweet....it's ok, I wanted french toast I look in the pan and see an egg frying Me....french toast? ummm ok...
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Yeah so what if I'm triple dipped in awesome sauce? The best way to predict the future, is to create it. |
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01-15-2011, 05:04 PM | #111 | |
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Damn!! This proves to everyone why you are always asking me where your glasses are!! There WAS french toast on the plate and I was just finishing up the egg as you stepped in the kitchen.... 'cuz you interrupted me, my egg ended up being "lacy". (if anybody wants to know what LACY eggs are...ask Blade ) As I remember the convo.... You asked "why didn't you let me make that for ya?" Me: Because I had a French Toast Kick You: now THAT's a post!! (and you ran off to the computer) What I didn't say was.... I didn't ask you to make French Toast because of you trying to stick to your diet. that's what I get for being nice to ya?
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01-15-2011, 09:21 PM | #112 |
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Papa and I discussing an upcoming conference I'm attending:
Papa: "So, what will you do there?" Me: "Industry stuff, same old shit every year." Papa: "I guess I'll just be hugging my pillows while you are gone." Me: "I guess I'll be hugging mine too, but, there will be ROOM SERVICE!" Papa: "Bitch, you got room service here! I bring you chocolate and Ginger Ale anytime you want." LMAO! Point taken. |
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01-15-2011, 10:29 PM | #113 |
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In the car, driving to the gym:
Me: I don't understand why you take a shower before going to the gym. Rene: Crust on crust leads to barnacles. Me: Andrea
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I am very spoiled! What we think about and thank about, we bring about! Today I will treat my body with love and respect.
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01-16-2011, 07:46 PM | #114 |
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my shower tonight reminded me of this old convo....
Blade: Which of these Muffy Puffers are yours?
Me: huh? Blade: Which of these Muffy Puffers are yours? Me: What on earth is a Muffy Puffer? That sounds like a new kind of sex toy? Blade: (looking at me cross) You know? The blue Muffy Puffers in the bath room? Me: OHHHHHH!!! do you mean the blue scrubbies? Blade: Yeah, MUFFY PUFFERS! Which one is yours? Me: None!! I don't used MUFFY PUFFERS!! (there are so many Muffy Puffers in the bathroom and linen closet, I think Blade bought stock in Muffy Puffers!!) |
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01-16-2011, 08:01 PM | #115 | |
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Cracking up....well I don't know what the hell to call them...all I know is they suds up way better than a wash cloth and they are like a brillo pad and scrub the grunge off my body.
Quote:
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Yeah so what if I'm triple dipped in awesome sauce? The best way to predict the future, is to create it. |
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01-16-2011, 08:25 PM | #116 | |
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When you first asked me, I thought you had an Ex girlfriend named Muffy? Or a girlfriend who left all her Muffy Puffers all over the bathroom? I think they multiply like Tribbles from Star Trek!! |
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01-16-2011, 11:28 PM | #117 | |
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Quote:
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01-17-2011, 08:25 PM | #118 |
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convo from Saturday morning
Jo and I were driving to Hope Depot then to Bob Evans for breakfast before going to beach
cant remember what we were talking about,but suddenly i Me: uh my butt has something to say about that Jo: oh please honey--ur butt ALWAYS has something to say Me: |
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01-25-2011, 09:06 PM | #119 |
Timed Out
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On Our Trip to St Augustine
after driving up after i got off work..we had some dinner then showered and hit the hay
Jo and I were laying in bed cuddling when she said JO: omg honey im gonna be 49 in just a couple of months ME: no problem honey i'll put a downpayment on a ScootAround for you |
01-25-2011, 09:10 PM | #120 | |
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I didn't bother to point out that she's Scoote...and I'm just gonna' make her carry me.
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