ACOA - Adult Children of Alcoholics

jelli · 07-12-2011, 09:41 AM

Adult Children of Alcoholics

YOU DO NOT HAVE TO ANSWER ANY OR ALL OF THESE ?'s

I am just curious...

How you dealt with being the child of an alcoholic?

Do you still harbor ill feelings?

Have you forgiven your parent/parents?

Did/do you seek counseling?

Do you yourself drink?

If you ARE the alcoholic parent of child/ren...

How does/did your drinking effect your family... ( mainly to any of you that had/have children? )

How have your children come to grips with how you were vs. how you are now?

Did you tend to use alot of emotional head games with your children?

What have you done to try and work things out with your children?

Apocalipstic · 07-12-2011, 11:36 AM

How you dealt with being the child of an alcoholic? Not very well. I have PTSD and other related issues which are related to my childhood.

Do you still harbor ill feelings? Yes I do, though its pointeless. My father is dead now as of a year and a half ago.

Have you forgiven your parent/parents? I am not all that sure what forgiveness is in my instance, but there was a lot more going on than alcoholism.

Did/do you seek counseling? Yes, I am in therapy and getting much better about things.

Do you yourself drink?
I used to drink a lot, but now I drink minimally in social settings only and then pretty rarely. I don't like how alcohol makes me feel any more.

I don't have children.

sylvie · 07-22-2011, 08:57 AM

How you dealt with being the child of an alcoholic? i have always been very passive of his drinking until recently, he has relied on me for years to ensure he is okay, it's started to really affect his health these passed few years and now i find i'm very intolerant to many things i used to take on - and feeling extremely fed up.. i have a lot of issues, including an addiction of my own, to food & an eating disorder - which i am in therapy for and alot of emotional battles i struggle with regarding trust, self esteem, panic, stress etc..

Do you still harbor ill feelings? very much so, i'm full of anger about it, things i have swallowed for years and years - emotions, having to grow up so early in life to take care of him, & the alcohol always coming first - things like that - i feel i'm finally ready to take these feelings on, and to stop enabling him.

Have you forgiven your parent/parents? it goes deeper than the alcoholism, so no.. i've not forgiven, but could i? i'm not sure, right now i'm working through my own issues, and i' m no longer taking his issues on anymore.. i've told him, if he needs medical attention, i'm there.. and if he decides to seek help for his addiction, i'm there with bells on... otherwise, i just can't anymore.

Did/do you seek counseling? i do, i did 4 weeks through my work EAP program, and am now starting soon for therapy for my eating disorder, just awaiting the date, just went for the intake last week. the therapy has been for my eating disorder, as well as my father's alcoholism, my past, etc. But it's certainly helped me come to terms with letting go, and putting me first.

Do you yourself drink? no, i do not drink, at all.. only as a teen on rare occasions, but really am not fond of alcohol whatsoever.

If you ARE the alcoholic parent of child/ren... n/a

07-12-2011, 09:41 AM	#1
jelli Member How Do You Identify?: Femmilicious Preferred Pronoun?: she Relationship Status: And you said I wasn’t your type!!! Join Date: Jul 2011 Location: SC Posts: 836 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 1,758 Thanked 1,079 Times in 377 Posts Rep Power: 16588547	ACOA - Adult Children of Alcoholics Adult Children of Alcoholics YOU DO NOT HAVE TO ANSWER ANY OR ALL OF THESE ?'s I am just curious... How you dealt with being the child of an alcoholic? Do you still harbor ill feelings? Have you forgiven your parent/parents? Did/do you seek counseling? Do you yourself drink? If you ARE the alcoholic parent of child/ren... How does/did your drinking effect your family... ( mainly to any of you that had/have children? ) How have your children come to grips with how you were vs. how you are now? Did you tend to use alot of emotional head games with your children? What have you done to try and work things out with your children? __________________ “Sometimes we make the right decision; sometimes we make the decision right.” “Every conflict is a lesson in self-discovery for both of us. Sometimes it's only hindsight that makes it worth it. For you, I would do it all again.“

07-12-2011, 11:36 AM	#2
Apocalipstic Pink Confection How Do You Identify?: Femme Preferred Pronoun?: She, Her, Ma'am Relationship Status: Dating Myself Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Nashville Posts: 4,266 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 17,195 Thanked 11,383 Times in 2,840 Posts Rep Power: 21474855	How you dealt with being the child of an alcoholic? Not very well. I have PTSD and other related issues which are related to my childhood. Do you still harbor ill feelings? Yes I do, though its pointeless. My father is dead now as of a year and a half ago. Have you forgiven your parent/parents? I am not all that sure what forgiveness is in my instance, but there was a lot more going on than alcoholism. Did/do you seek counseling? Yes, I am in therapy and getting much better about things. Do you yourself drink? I used to drink a lot, but now I drink minimally in social settings only and then pretty rarely. I don't like how alcohol makes me feel any more. I don't have children. __________________

07-22-2011, 08:57 AM	#3
sylvie Senior Member How Do You Identify?: Mr Mtn's babygirl Preferred Pronoun?: girly, she Relationship Status: fiercely protected ♥ Join Date: Jan 2010 Location: Moving home in OR with Him VERY soooon !! Posts: 2,548 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 4,834 Thanked 7,501 Times in 1,850 Posts Rep Power: 21474853	How you dealt with being the child of an alcoholic? i have always been very passive of his drinking until recently, he has relied on me for years to ensure he is okay, it's started to really affect his health these passed few years and now i find i'm very intolerant to many things i used to take on - and feeling extremely fed up.. i have a lot of issues, including an addiction of my own, to food & an eating disorder - which i am in therapy for and alot of emotional battles i struggle with regarding trust, self esteem, panic, stress etc.. Do you still harbor ill feelings? very much so, i'm full of anger about it, things i have swallowed for years and years - emotions, having to grow up so early in life to take care of him, & the alcohol always coming first - things like that - i feel i'm finally ready to take these feelings on, and to stop enabling him. Have you forgiven your parent/parents? it goes deeper than the alcoholism, so no.. i've not forgiven, but could i? i'm not sure, right now i'm working through my own issues, and i' m no longer taking his issues on anymore.. i've told him, if he needs medical attention, i'm there.. and if he decides to seek help for his addiction, i'm there with bells on... otherwise, i just can't anymore. Did/do you seek counseling? i do, i did 4 weeks through my work EAP program, and am now starting soon for therapy for my eating disorder, just awaiting the date, just went for the intake last week. the therapy has been for my eating disorder, as well as my father's alcoholism, my past, etc. But it's certainly helped me come to terms with letting go, and putting me first. Do you yourself drink? no, i do not drink, at all.. only as a teen on rare occasions, but really am not fond of alcohol whatsoever. If you ARE the alcoholic parent of child/ren... n/a __________________ my Mantra: i am letting go of angers, continuing to find forgiveness, welcoming inner peace & deserving of it all. my facebook weight loss page: http://www.facebook.com/asyllyjourney