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Old 08-18-2021, 05:16 PM   #1
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Old 08-28-2021, 10:30 PM   #2
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I guess it always takes someone to go first! I will.

I have thought for many, many years that the site should have a maximum amount of posts allowed by any one person per day? week? month?

I am only speaking for myself, but I find it quite boring, and frustrating and insensitive that I see the same few names or name monopolizing almost every topic on the board. That, I am aware, is what has driven many people away. I can only imagine how many people I do not know of, whose reasons for staying away are the same.

If there is anything that can be implemented to achieve this goal, and possibly bring back some of our previous members who have strayed, that would make me very appreciative.

Thank you for "listening" and reading this.
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Old 08-29-2021, 09:46 AM   #3
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I guess it always takes someone to go first! I will.

I have thought for many, many years that the site should have a maximum amount of posts allowed by any one person per day? week? month?

I am only speaking for myself, but I find it quite boring, and frustrating and insensitive that I see the same few names or name monopolizing almost every topic on the board. That, I am aware, is what has driven many people away. I can only imagine how many people I do not know of, whose reasons for staying away are the same.

If there is anything that can be implemented to achieve this goal, and possibly bring back some of our previous members who have strayed, that would make me very appreciative.

Thank you for "listening" and reading this.
Do you think that limiting the amount of posts each person can post in a day, week or month would increase traffic to the site? Which threads do you see those returning people posting in? Is it possible that limiting posts per person could have the opposite effect and we might end up with even less posts? There are so few already, I wouldn't care for less. Although I don't post much at all anymore, I need this community in my life, even if it's just to be assured that everyone is still having lunch and buying stuff.
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Old 08-29-2021, 10:07 AM   #4
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Do you think that limiting the amount of posts each person can post in a day, week or month would increase traffic to the site? Which threads do you see those returning people posting in? Is it possible that limiting posts per person could have the opposite effect and we might end up with even less posts? There are so few already, I wouldn't care for less. Although I don't post much at all anymore, I need this community in my life, even if it's just to be assured that everyone is still having lunch and buying stuff.
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Old 08-30-2021, 03:38 AM   #5
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afemmenatalie, yes I know what you mean. It can be annoying and to me seems like desperate pleas for attention if it’s done over and over again.

Although it can be annoying I just ignore it and I don’t think there should be a limit on posts. There could be times when a discussion gets going where multiple posts are warranted. And imposing limits because one or a few people can’t use common sense doesn’t seem like a great solution to me. I also don’t think it’s what is keeping people away. I think the main reason is most people prefer social media type sites these days. Personally I detest them but I am in the distinct minority.

I sure wish there was more than just word games and what’s for dinner but there aren’t many posting much these days including me. I can’t even remember the last time I saw an actual Butch-Femme related discussion.

I’m an old dinosaur and much prefer this forum style of site over the newer snazzier social media sites that have a lot of cool features but where I find it nearly impossible to have an actual conversation and very hard to find anything more than a day old. I like this old format. I wish more people did and that the old software could keep up. It is what it is. I’ve been left behind in the dust. In more ways than one lol.

Long live vbulletin lol.

Thanks so much Angie for all you have done and do. So sorry you had to deal with such a big mess recently.
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Old 08-30-2021, 01:46 PM   #6
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I believe that the site needs to allow more people to be offended and I think being offensive requres more thought ( and often humour ) than being constantly agreeable.

Cut the crude and you may just cut to the bone of an idea worth considering. It also makes for more interesting reading and if you can raise the blood to boiling, you may just have said something worth saying.

Really, there only just so many ways to heat up tater tots.

Take a shot at heating up a poitical, social or religious conversation.
If you're any good at it, try to be amusing at the same time...but go for the main artery and express what's really liable to cause your next stroke.

Save yourself.
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Old 08-30-2021, 08:02 PM   #7
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I enjoy reading everyone's ideas. I think limiting posts may not produce the outcome that is wanted only due factors such as time of day and number of new posts. I think this current format is very well structured and allows people to easily follow different forums and post with ease. I post every day in a few different threads and sometimes in some additional threads if there is something new or interesting. I like to read what others are having for dinner or what is on their agenda. I get great ideas and like to know how everyone is doing.
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Old 08-30-2021, 10:29 PM   #8
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I don't know about anyone else, but when I log on, I go through my email which has recent posts to threads to which I am subscribed. I'll go down the list and post to the ones that strike my fancy and some days, that's all of them, which leads to a long list of Last Poster: Gemme. I suppose how that can be annoying to some but eh, too bad, so sad my friends. If you don't want one person to hog the posts, then post more yourselves.

Ta da!

Also, I really wish the emails from the last two months were able to be resurrected but that's my fault for not copying the really important ones elsewhere.
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Old 08-31-2021, 01:20 AM   #9
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Originally Posted by Cin View Post
Do you think that limiting the amount of posts each person can post in a day, week or month would increase traffic to the site? Which threads do you see those returning people posting in? Is it possible that limiting posts per person could have the opposite effect and we might end up with even less posts? There are so few already, I wouldn't care for less. Although I don't post much at all anymore, I need this community in my life, even if it's just to be assured that everyone is still having lunch and buying stuff.
Cin,
Thank you for writing your thoughts.
It is not that I think that limiting posts by the same person(s) would increase traffic to the site. What I think it will do, is encourage some people to return and be able to comment and perhaps even have an intelligent discussion about something meaningful.

Of course it is possible that limiting posts per person could have the opposite effect and we could end up with fewer posts, but perhaps more discussion! There's a thought for you!

I would like to think I need this community in my life too, but not the way it is right now. If I want to know if people are eating lunch, I can walk by a restaurant at lunch time and look in. As for people buying things, I can look at the cashier's lines in stores, or look at the stocks on any given day to see how commerce is doing. I do not look to this site to provide me with this information.
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Old 08-31-2021, 02:03 AM   #10
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afemmenatalie, yes I know what you mean. It can be annoying and to me seems like desperate pleas for attention if itís done over and over again.

Although it can be annoying I just ignore it and I donít think there should be a limit on posts. There could be times when a discussion gets going where multiple posts are warranted. And imposing limits because one or a few people canít use common sense doesnít seem like a great solution to me. I also donít think itís what is keeping people away. I think the main reason is most people prefer social media type sites these days. Personally I detest them but I am in the distinct minority.

I sure wish there was more than just word games and whatís for dinner but there arenít many posting much these days including me. I canít even remember the last time I saw an actual Butch-Femme related discussion.

Iím an old dinosaur and much prefer this forum style of site over the newer snazzier social media sites that have a lot of cool features but where I find it nearly impossible to have an actual conversation and very hard to find anything more than a day old. I like this old format. I wish more people did and that the old software could keep up. It is what it is. Iíve been left behind in the dust. In more ways than one lol.

Long live vbulletin lol.

Thanks so much Angie for all you have done and do. So sorry you had to deal with such a big mess recently.
------------------
BullDog,

Thank you for writing your thoughts and sharing your perspective.

Multiple posts to facilitate a discussion are perfectly acceptable and would be warmly received. It's the one word posts, emoticons, or copying of articles without any commentary which is annoying when it happens incessantly. It almost seems like the poster has nothing to say, but wants to post something. I am guilty of playing word games on the site as it is one way to use my brain and interact with others.

I tend to think the main reason people prefer social media type sites is because they can post pictures of their lunches or dinners, share recipes, talk nonsense and take meaningless surveys. I can not say I am fond of them either, except when there is something cat-related.

There are many topics listed to encourage a discussion of Butch-Femme related issues/interest.

I am a well-aged woman who prefers this forum style over the zippier sites that interest youngsters and those folks who are more casual than me!

VBulletin continues to enjoy a long life. A new version was introduced in October of 2020!
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Old 08-31-2021, 03:14 AM   #11
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------------------
BullDog,

Thank you for writing your thoughts and sharing your perspective.

Multiple posts to facilitate a discussion are perfectly acceptable and would be warmly received. It's the one word posts, emoticons, or copying of articles without any commentary which is annoying when it happens incessantly. It almost seems like the poster has nothing to say, but wants to post something. I am guilty of playing word games on the site as it is one way to use my brain and interact with others.

I tend to think the main reason people prefer social media type sites is because they can post pictures of their lunches or dinners, share recipes, talk nonsense and take meaningless surveys. I can not say I am fond of them either, except when there is something cat-related.

There are many topics listed to encourage a discussion of Butch-Femme related issues/interest.

I am a well-aged woman who prefers this forum style over the zippier sites that interest youngsters and those folks who are more casual than me!

VBulletin continues to enjoy a long life. A new version was introduced in October of 2020!
Yes I understand what you mean in terms of the types of posts you find annoying. I am glad you brought it up. I wish that type of behavior would change but Iím not sure it will. I also donít see how limiting posts would solve it and donít think it would be fair to limit everyone due to one or a few people.

As to the suggestion to post more, I have zero interest in spamming the front page with a bunch of meaningless one liners just so I can see BullDog after each thread. Thatís what bugs people. No one has a problem with genuine responses to threads.

I donít have anything against word games or whatís for dinner but when thatís all there is then thereís nothing to hold my interest. I could try to contribute other types of content and hope others were interested in joining in. To be honest, I am not sure I have the motivation and I am very busy. So for me I am just accepting that it is what it is. I guess I just posted here because I really like this style of site and wish more people did. Maybe at some point an interesting discussion will arise and in the meantime I wish the word game players and dinner posters well and hope they continue to enjoy the site. They are the ones posting what they want to post and if some of us wish there was other stuff itís up to us to make it happen.
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Old 08-31-2021, 01:32 PM   #12
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just my thoughts..if you would prefer other content..please make it...i would love to hear from newer people if they want to share...it doesn't have to be earth shaking..i appreciate hearing about someone's day, their challenges, struggles or what they had for dinner...it's all relevant and appreciated
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Old 08-31-2021, 03:03 PM   #13
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Cin,
Thank you for writing your thoughts.
It is not that I think that limiting posts by the same person(s) would increase traffic to the site. What I think it will do, is encourage some people to return and be able to comment and perhaps even have an intelligent discussion about something meaningful.

Of course it is possible that limiting posts per person could have the opposite effect and we could end up with fewer posts, but perhaps more discussion! There's a thought for you!

I would like to think I need this community in my life too, but not the way it is right now. If I want to know if people are eating lunch, I can walk by a restaurant at lunch time and look in. As for people buying things, I can look at the cashier's lines in stores, or look at the stocks on any given day to see how commerce is doing. I do not look to this site to provide me with this information.
I have given some thought to your statement that perhaps the end result of limiting posts is that we could end up with fewer posts but more discussion. I suppose it is possible that limiting posts per person might encourage some people, who are silent because of a disdain for emoticons and one word responses, to comment and have intelligent discussions about meaningful things but I have my doubts. I have been on this site and the old dot com site since the late 90s and there were always people who posted one word posts and emoticons. Copying articles without any commentary (something I have been guilty of) is relatively new in the past ten years or so. But this kind of fluff posting has been happening since the inception of discussion boards and still a lot of deep and meaningful conversations covering a variety of topics happened right in amongst these one word posts and emoticons. I never noticed anyone complaining their voice was taken away by people posting too many emoticons or one word responses. There were always people who complained about too much fluff but there were still people posting who were interested in having deeper conversations and they did so regardless. Nowadays, I am sad to say, I don't think there are any people interested in having these types of discussions any longer. The whys are probably as varied as snowflakes. But I doubt that others who have different posting likes and styles going on a posting diet will change that.

I am not interested in walking by restaurants at lunch time or looking at cashier's lines in stores and I would rather poke my eyes out with a sharp stick than look at stocks for any reason. A bizarre obsession for people and their lunches was not my reason for still checking in to this site often. There are still people left on these boards whose posts I have been reading for many years. I have been privileged to read the things about their lives they have chosen to share here. And I am happy to read what they had for lunch or what is on their agendas if they want to share that. I'm happy to know they are still here. I don't care about strangers in restaurants or check out lines. I want a butch femme community in my life in whatever capacity I can have it. Do I miss the discussions about gender, what it means to be butch or femme, female masculinity etc...? You bet I do. Even the heart wrenching, soul crushing difficult conversations I have had, like the one on the other site on a thread called Border Wars. I miss those interactions more than I can put into words. And that's saying something for me because I never have a shortage of words and ways I can put them together. I have been told my posts are too long but that never stopped me. Nothing stopped me. Except the loss of anyone to talk to. That stopped me. No point sending words out into a black hole. So I would be thrilled if people who wanted deep meaningful conversations and had the time for them came back but I don't expect that will happen. I'm not going to get more people posting the things I want to talk about by restricting others from engaging on this site in the ways that bring them pleasure. Just like the bullshit stories we often hear about scarcity and how there isn't enough of whatever to go around, it isn't true. There is enough to go around for everyone, if they want it. Write the post you want to read, be the change you want to see, light a candle rather than curse the darkness, in other words, platitude platitude platitude, blah blah blah. (Sorry, can't help myself, I do so love a good platitude. Truthfully I've rarely met a platitude I didn't like).
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Old 08-31-2021, 03:50 PM   #14
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Good post Cin. I feel the same. I do really miss the old discussions. I am tempted to say I miss the "good ole days" but people were lamenting the loss of the "good ole days" 15 or 20 years ago, lol. I would probably join in if there was a good conversation already but I don't really have the energy to get one started and quite frankly I don't think it would go anywhere if I was the one to start it. I have enjoyed some of the fairly recent political conversations. I hope there are people out there somewhere having substantial and meaningful conversations in this abbreviated world of texts and social media posts.
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Old 08-31-2021, 04:00 PM   #15
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just my thoughts..if you would prefer other content..please make it...i would love to hear from newer people if they want to share...it doesn't have to be earth shaking..i appreciate hearing about someone's day, their challenges, struggles or what they had for dinner...it's all relevant and appreciated


These are my thoughts as well...
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Old 09-01-2021, 11:56 AM   #16
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I miss chat! You really got to know folks and i looked forward to real time discussions.
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Old 09-01-2021, 07:39 PM   #17
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Hey folks!

I am STOKED to see the discussion here. It's been way too long since I've taken a look around here as well and it's mostly just life stuff getting in the way. (bad Admin, bad bad bad BAD!)

So, a couple of things I want to run by you folks and get your input:

1. The gallery - Our gallery software is fried. The company I bought it from 12 years ago is out of business and hadn't updated in years and that software was not only not secure but is not compatible with our new level of server security. I have the photos - they are not gone! It will just be a slow process to resurrect them in some way that will allow folks to grab their photos. Im still figuring that out and it will be extremely time consuming but I'm committed to doing it.

Until then, I will be ALLOWING personal photos in GALLERY THREADS. I will begin creating those now and you are free to post photos in those threads as you wish (no nudity please! We end up on porn filters when there is nudity and I don't want that because it brings creepers!)

LINK HERE: http://www.butchfemmeplanet.com/foru...play.php?f=147


2. Chat room - I've had a couple of request for a chat room. Chat room software that will integrate with our site as it is now is just...undesireable. It's not that it *can't* happen, it's just that it's a giant pain in the asssssss. I know there are a chunk of folks who have felt a little pissy because I have put no effort into putting another chat room on this site and for that, I do apologize for the feelings. I guess I'm asking if folks would use one?


3. I feel like it might be a good time to revamp the rules on the site. I did that a few years back and basically was just like "don't be an asshole". Our rules here got SO fucking restrictive when we had more folks using the site because people LOVEEEE to test boundaries (like posting pictures of dead bodies and doxxing personal info and claiming that I, personally, "broke into their PayPal account LOLOL) but I feel like the "don't be an asshole" rule is a good one. I feel like people should be allowed to disagree and I'll be frank, people are adults here and should feel free to state their feelings without me (cause I aint nobody's Momma) coming in here and cyberslapping people.
I DO NOT want to foster an environment for bullying but I kinda feel like the user base is small enough now that we don't really need moderation all that much? Thoughts?

4. I miss the old discussions too. I miss some of the old faces. I miss the celebration of the dynamic. We are all getting old so I know some of us are just not using forums the same way but I sure do relish in some very good memories.


I'll be starting some threads pertaining to some shit JD and I have gone through in the last couple of years (aging parents, buying and selling houses, probating estates, dealing with a mean-ass crazy greedy vengeful unhealed toxic ex (I kid! I kid!), and preparing for old age with legal docs and such. I'll probably put those discussions in members-only forums so folks can share more private stuff if they wish and I hope to see some of you folks participate.


Again, I super appreciate the feedback from all of you. <3
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Old 09-04-2021, 01:30 PM   #18
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Some time ago, about the time of my third, approx, "expulsion/excomunication ", I started complaining about the same nic appearing after every post, at the end of every thread, on the opening screen... and I believe the site started developing COPD soon after...no air, no space to develop anything.
Why write a longish thoughtful post ( good or bad ) when it's going to be buried below the fold by noon and disappear by suppertime?

People, at least me, write to be read and if they don't, why are they bothering typing and posting? Doesn't mean my stuff is brilliant but I refuse to accept that cut and paste news reposts or little flag icons are more worthy of notice and should be blasted out endlessly.

Is there some sort of contest that many of us don't know about?

And why so many " thanks " for what someone had for lunch. It's like applauding the word " brocolli" and, to my mind only, I suppose, it cheapens the expression of appreciation until it becomes meaningless Are people really crushed if no one thanks them for listing their omellette ingredients?

BTW, Tonight I'll be having tacos with fresh tomahhhtoes.

(Maybe I should have second thoughts before posting this....nah )
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Old 09-04-2021, 09:42 PM   #19
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Some time ago, about the time of my third, approx, "expulsion/excomunication ", I started complaining about the same nic appearing after every post, at the end of every thread, on the opening screen... and I believe the site started developing COPD soon after...no air, no space to develop anything.
Why write a longish thoughtful post ( good or bad ) when it's going to be buried below the fold by noon and disappear by suppertime?

People, at least me, write to be read and if they don't, why are they bothering typing and posting? Doesn't mean my stuff is brilliant but I refuse to accept that cut and paste news reposts or little flag icons are more worthy of notice and should be blasted out endlessly.

Is there some sort of contest that many of us don't know about?

And why so many " thanks " for what someone had for lunch. It's like applauding the word " brocolli" and, to my mind only, I suppose, it cheapens the expression of appreciation until it becomes meaningless Are people really crushed if no one thanks them for listing their omellette ingredients?

BTW, Tonight I'll be having tacos with fresh tomahhhtoes.

(Maybe I should have second thoughts before posting this....nah )
I like broccoli. I also like tacos, with or without tomatoes. I don't like Brussels sprouts so I tend to not 'thank' posts with them unless the other food mentioned is so damn good, I can overlook it.

I also don't care if someone thanks my posts or even reads them. I post to put things out there into the Universe and to keep my place in a location that has family. I don't have that IRL so I have to get it from somewhere. One of my somewheres is here. As long as someone isn't posting to cause drama or just to be an ass for no good reason, I don't care why other people post either.

It's like shouting into the wind. Sometimes someone hears it and sometimes they don't. *shrug* And if down the road, someone read my posts and thinks, "That Gemme was alright!", I wouldn't hate it but I wouldn't expect it and I wouldn't get huffy if I don't get responses, even if my stuff was brilliant.

Different strokes 'n all.
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Old 09-05-2021, 06:51 AM   #20
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Some time ago, about the time of my third, approx, "expulsion/excomunication "...
Like foot fungus. Just when you think you've gotten rid of it for good it keeps coming back.
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