Baby Butch Journey - Page 4

Abigail Crabby · 01-05-2012, 05:22 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by blucollargrl

I should have listened to some of the advice I received from this thread. I gave all I had and it wasn't enough. Tapped out emotionally and financially....not that I had a lot of money to begin with. Just sayin. A lesson well learned......don't give your heart to quickly or completely, especially when the other person is emotionally unavailable. It was all great advice, I just had to find out for myself I guess!!! Argghhhh!!

Advice is always great - but we as human beings tend to listen to our inner thoughts and learn the lessons needed.

Don't beat yourself up over this - mistakes are made and gotten over. Hearts get broken and mend....

The best part is when the time is right - you will be available for the perfect person for you.....

blucollargrl · 01-05-2012, 09:47 PM

I love this sight....everyone is so helpful and things aren't sugarcoated!! Makes it easier for a baby butch to find her way.

blucollargrl · 01-06-2012, 01:24 PM

Light bulb moment!! Being new to this butch/femme dynamic I had no idea how my mind and body would react to it. It made me physically feel things that were foreign to me and sent my mind in to a tail spin. Having that strong attraction to a femme was as new to me as it was natural. I don't know if anyone else has felt this way, but I never saw myself as "butch". I can thank a good friend of mine....who for a "new" lesbian, suprisingly saw it before I did......for opening my eyes and unknowingly helping me be who I am. Then out of nowhere there's this beautiful femme. She drew me to her like a magnet without knowing it. I didn't even know it and I didn't understand it. But it felt like home. If there are "baby butches", (i don't know if that's the right term, but it works) out there like myself, the one thing I can say to them is to educate yourselves, take it slow and don't let it overwhelm you. It's a crazy, beautiful, intense wonderful ride.......this butch/femme dynamic and I have so much more to learn. You all have helped in more ways than you know. I'm looking forward to continuing my journey. I never knew the touch of a femme could drop me to my knees!! Wow!

Toughy · 01-06-2012, 04:12 PM

Quote:

I never knew the touch of a femme could drop me to my knees!! Wow!

from an 'old butch'......40 years later and that feeling still exists for me...

*Anya* · 01-06-2012, 04:24 PM

Hi there baby butch!

The right femme will be dropping to her knees for you in a hot minute

Corkey · 01-06-2012, 06:01 PM

I prefer my femme to drop to her knees, but who's mincing...

The_Lady_Snow · 01-06-2012, 06:29 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Corkey

I prefer my femme to drop to her knees, but who's mincing...

It's cause you found the kind that does, some of us, not so much....

Corkey · 01-06-2012, 07:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by The_Lady_Snow

It's cause you found the kind that does, some of us, not so much....

Tis why I'm not mincing...

Strappie · 01-06-2012, 08:17 PM

Hey Blu,

I gotta tell you it takes a lot of guts to admit things went wrong or that it just didn't work and trust me, it's okay to stumble.

You will stumble and trip along the way but you will always find your feet again. Just take your time don't rush it. Life takes us to the path, you get to choose which path to take. Will it be left, right or forward?

It's all up hill for you now.. learn from it. Ask yourself those questions I wrote earlier to find a better path for next time. I try not to say any relationship was a regret because honestly you do get something out of each relationship, good or bad. Hopefully you will learn from each one. Listen to your self dig deep and do it better next time. If you don't dig into it you will find yourself repeating the pattern (the pickers off) and you don't want that.

Good luck to you in the future. There are a lot of amazing people on here, listen, take what you need, throw out the rest.

Sachita · 01-08-2012, 08:04 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by blucollargrl

Light bulb moment!! Being new to this butch/femme dynamic I had no idea how my mind and body would react to it. It made me physically feel things that were foreign to me and sent my mind in to a tail spin. Having that strong attraction to a femme was as new to me as it was natural. I don't know if anyone else has felt this way, but I never saw myself as "butch". I can thank a good friend of mine....who for a "new" lesbian, suprisingly saw it before I did......for opening my eyes and unknowingly helping me be who I am. Then out of nowhere there's this beautiful femme. She drew me to her like a magnet without knowing it. I didn't even know it and I didn't understand it. But it felt like home. If there are "baby butches", (i don't know if that's the right term, but it works) out there like myself, the one thing I can say to them is to educate yourselves, take it slow and don't let it overwhelm you. It's a crazy, beautiful, intense wonderful ride.......this butch/femme dynamic and I have so much more to learn. You all have helped in more ways than you know. I'm looking forward to continuing my journey. I never knew the touch of a femme could drop me to my knees!! Wow!

Its sounds like you feel in love with the experience and its not just about the woman. I'm not saying you didn't have feelings for her but that the first connection is always "WOW" and your hormones can get the best of you, for sure! It's not a bad thing but looking at the whole picture you want all the elements there for a good relationship. People laugh at me because I approach relationships like business partners, in a sense. Yes I want chemistry but everything else has to make sense. You've got to really like and respect the person you're going to spend in and day out with. If you base it strictly on lust then you're making a big mistake.

*Anya* · 01-08-2012, 10:19 AM

Baby butch,

There are many layers to this journey of ours. I think that when we first come out or recognize our true identity, regardless of what that means to us; the world is like a brand-new place. We may have always lived in it but all of a sudden, we are looking at it through brand-new eyes.

No matter our age, there is a certain adolescent quality to it. I laid eyes on my 1st honest-to-god butch at age 16 and did go weak in the knees ( though did not fall to my knees).

I had a circuitous route to finally coming out but when I did, at about age 25, I was about in love with everyone I laid eyes on.

It does take some time and experience to get to the place where you do not want to jump the bones of every hot one that you see ( well some never get to that place), to not think you are in love with everyone you are seriously attracted to and really learn the difference between attraction/love and lust.

It is a process and can be hot, fun and painful- not necessarily in that order but a wonderful journey it is-into this world of ours.

Buckle up baby, it can be a bumpy ride!

Bootsandheels · 01-10-2012, 08:55 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by blucollargrl

Light bulb moment!! Being new to this butch/femme dynamic I had no idea how my mind and body would react to it. It made me physically feel things that were foreign to me and sent my mind in to a tail spin. Having that strong attraction to a femme was as new to me as it was natural. I don't know if anyone else has felt this way, but I never saw myself as "butch". I can thank a good friend of mine....who for a "new" lesbian, suprisingly saw it before I did......for opening my eyes and unknowingly helping me be who I am. Then out of nowhere there's this beautiful femme. She drew me to her like a magnet without knowing it. I didn't even know it and I didn't understand it. But it felt like home. If there are "baby butches", (i don't know if that's the right term, but it works) out there like myself, the one thing I can say to them is to educate yourselves, take it slow and don't let it overwhelm you. It's a crazy, beautiful, intense wonderful ride.......this butch/femme dynamic and I have so much more to learn. You all have helped in more ways than you know. I'm looking forward to continuing my journey. I never knew the touch of a femme could drop me to my knees!! Wow!

Good Luck to you Blu...she will be a very lucky femme to hold your heart and keep you...

01-05-2012, 09:47 PM	#62
blucollargrl Junior Member How Do You Identify?: butch Preferred Pronoun?: she Relationship Status: never find another like her Join Date: Nov 2011 Location: seattle Posts: 13 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 59 Thanked 52 Times in 9 Posts Rep Power: 1573153	I love this sight....everyone is so helpful and things aren't sugarcoated!! Makes it easier for a baby butch to find her way. __________________ :

01-06-2012, 01:24 PM	#63
blucollargrl Junior Member How Do You Identify?: butch Preferred Pronoun?: she Relationship Status: never find another like her Join Date: Nov 2011 Location: seattle Posts: 13 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 59 Thanked 52 Times in 9 Posts Rep Power: 1573153	Light bulb moment!! Being new to this butch/femme dynamic I had no idea how my mind and body would react to it. It made me physically feel things that were foreign to me and sent my mind in to a tail spin. Having that strong attraction to a femme was as new to me as it was natural. I don't know if anyone else has felt this way, but I never saw myself as "butch". I can thank a good friend of mine....who for a "new" lesbian, suprisingly saw it before I did......for opening my eyes and unknowingly helping me be who I am. Then out of nowhere there's this beautiful femme. She drew me to her like a magnet without knowing it. I didn't even know it and I didn't understand it. But it felt like home. If there are "baby butches", (i don't know if that's the right term, but it works) out there like myself, the one thing I can say to them is to educate yourselves, take it slow and don't let it overwhelm you. It's a crazy, beautiful, intense wonderful ride.......this butch/femme dynamic and I have so much more to learn. You all have helped in more ways than you know. I'm looking forward to continuing my journey. I never knew the touch of a femme could drop me to my knees!! Wow! __________________ :

01-06-2012, 04:24 PM	#65
Anya Infamous Member How Do You Identify?: Lesbian non-stone femme Preferred Pronoun?: She, her Relationship Status: Committed to being good to myself Join Date: Jun 2011 Location: West Coast Posts: 8,258 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 39,306 Thanked 40,791 Times in 7,290 Posts Rep Power: 21474856	Hi there baby butch! The right femme will be dropping to her knees for you in a hot minute __________________ ~Anya~ Democracy Dies in Darkness ~Washington Post "...I'm deeply concerned by recently adopted policies which punish children for their parents’ actions ... The thought that any State would seek to deter parents by inflicting such abuse on children is unconscionable." UN Human Rights commissioner

01-06-2012, 06:01 PM	#66
Corkey Infamous Member How Do You Identify?: Human Preferred Pronoun?: He Relationship Status: Very Married Join Date: Dec 2009 Location: Where I want to be Posts: 8,155 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 47,491 Thanked 29,299 Times in 6,640 Posts Rep Power: 21474859	I prefer my femme to drop to her knees, but who's mincing... __________________ "Many proposals have been made to us to adopt your laws, your religion, your manners and your customs. We would be better pleased with beholding the good effects of these doctrines in your own practices, than with hearing you talk about them". ~Old Tassel, Chief of the Tsalagi (Cherokee)

01-08-2012, 10:19 AM	#71
Anya Infamous Member How Do You Identify?: Lesbian non-stone femme Preferred Pronoun?: She, her Relationship Status: Committed to being good to myself Join Date: Jun 2011 Location: West Coast Posts: 8,258 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 39,306 Thanked 40,791 Times in 7,290 Posts Rep Power: 21474856	Baby butch, There are many layers to this journey of ours. I think that when we first come out or recognize our true identity, regardless of what that means to us; the world is like a brand-new place. We may have always lived in it but all of a sudden, we are looking at it through brand-new eyes. No matter our age, there is a certain adolescent quality to it. I laid eyes on my 1st honest-to-god butch at age 16 and did go weak in the knees ( though did not fall to my knees). I had a circuitous route to finally coming out but when I did, at about age 25, I was about in love with everyone I laid eyes on. It does take some time and experience to get to the place where you do not want to jump the bones of every hot one that you see ( well some never get to that place), to not think you are in love with everyone you are seriously attracted to and really learn the difference between attraction/love and lust. It is a process and can be hot, fun and painful- not necessarily in that order but a wonderful journey it is-into this world of ours. Buckle up baby, it can be a bumpy ride! __________________ ~Anya~ Democracy Dies in Darkness ~Washington Post "...I'm deeply concerned by recently adopted policies which punish children for their parents’ actions ... The thought that any State would seek to deter parents by inflicting such abuse on children is unconscionable." UN Human Rights commissioner

01-06-2012, 08:17 PM	#69
Strappie Senior Member How Do You Identify?: Butch Preferred Pronoun?: I know who I am... Doesn't matter Relationship Status: It's a new day.... Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Mpls, MN Posts: 3,283 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 3,813 Thanked 4,946 Times in 1,350 Posts Rep Power: 21474854	Hey Blu, I gotta tell you it takes a lot of guts to admit things went wrong or that it just didn't work and trust me, it's okay to stumble. You will stumble and trip along the way but you will always find your feet again. Just take your time don't rush it. Life takes us to the path, you get to choose which path to take. Will it be left, right or forward? It's all up hill for you now.. learn from it. Ask yourself those questions I wrote earlier to find a better path for next time. I try not to say any relationship was a regret because honestly you do get something out of each relationship, good or bad. Hopefully you will learn from each one. Listen to your self dig deep and do it better next time. If you don't dig into it you will find yourself repeating the pattern (the pickers off) and you don't want that. Good luck to you in the future. There are a lot of amazing people on here, listen, take what you need, throw out the rest.