10-31-2018, 10:52 AM | #801 |
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11-22-2018, 10:42 AM | #802 |
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Why did the turkey cross the road?
It was Thanksgiving Day and he wanted people to think he was a chicken! What do you get if you divide the circumference of a pumpkin by its diameter? Pumpkin pi. |
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11-23-2018, 09:56 PM | #803 |
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Turkey Fowl fouls -
Why was the Thanksgiving soup so expensive?
It had 24 carrots. What happened when the turkey got into a fight? He got the stuffing knocked out of him! What do you get when you cross a turkey with a banjo? A turkey that can pluck itself! Ks- |
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12-01-2018, 09:15 AM | #804 |
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How do you get straight A's?
--->>> With a ruler. Why is a Math book so unhappy? --->>> Because it's full of problems. What did one pencil say to the other? --->>> You look sharp! What do you get when you cross a pair of pants with a dictionary? --->>> Smarty Pants. |
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12-04-2018, 09:03 AM | #805 |
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12-04-2018, 12:01 PM | #806 |
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What do you call Santa when he stops moving?
Santa Pause🎅
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12-04-2018, 06:51 PM | #807 |
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What do reindeers say before they tell you a joke?
This one’s gonna sleigh you! How much did Santa pay for his sleigh? Nothing. It was on the house! |
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12-06-2018, 02:11 PM | #808 |
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why do Dasher and Dancer love coffee?
Because they are Santa's star bucks!!
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12-12-2018, 10:32 PM | #809 |
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12-15-2018, 10:25 AM | #810 |
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Saturday Santa Sillies-
What do you call someone who is afraid of Santa?
A Claus-terphobic Where does Santa go to practice how to slide down chimneys? A chimnasium. What’s the difference between Santa’s reindeer and a knight? One slays the dragon, and the other is draggin’ the sleigh. Ks- |
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12-23-2018, 12:28 AM | #811 |
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How much did Santa pay for his sleigh?
-Nothing, it was on the house! What do you get if you cross Father Christmas with a duck? -A Christmas Quacker! What kind of motorbike does Santa ride? -A Holly Davidson! What do reindeer hang on their Christmas trees? -Horn-aments! Happy Holidays to the many Corny Joke family! Ks- |
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12-24-2018, 08:47 AM | #812 |
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Did you know that Rudolph the Reindeer never went to school?
He was elf taught. |
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12-31-2018, 03:29 PM | #813 |
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My final 2018 Corny Joke post-
What happened to the person who stole a calendar on New Year’s Eve?
They got 12 months. To all who have enjoyed reading this thread and for those of us who have entertained you: A laugh is a smile that bursts! All the best 2019! Ksrainbow- |
01-18-2019, 06:57 PM | #814 |
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2019!
A weasel walks into a bar. The bartender says, “Wow, I’ve never served a weasel before.
What can I get you?” “Pop,” goes the weasel. Visitor at a ranch says to a cowboy, “Wow, you have a lot of flies buzzing round your horses and cows. Do you ever shoo them?” The cowboy replies, “No, we just let them go barefoot.” I started a web page on a social media site to help those in need in the poultry industry... Its called: "Help us make hens meet" Ks- |
01-26-2019, 04:42 PM | #815 |
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*My mood ring is missing and I don't know how to feel about that*
*Cow stumbles into a pot field, the steaks have never been higher* *Irony. The opposite of wrinkly* Ks- |
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02-11-2019, 05:37 PM | #816 |
Timed Out - Permanent
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vegan vs. vegetarianism
There is a lot of talk of the virtues of being vegan vs. vegetarianism,
I think this is all a missed steak. |
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02-16-2019, 07:58 PM | #817 |
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Gone to the dogs...
At the dog park, a lady had two rather large rottweiler dogs.
Being asked the dogs’ names by another park visitor she replied, “one is called Timex and the other Rolex.” "Wow, those are some strange names for dogs!" the visitor replied. “Not really,” the dog owner replied, “they’re watch dogs. Ks- |
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02-17-2019, 12:50 PM | #818 |
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I have to let you all know... This thread is one of my happy places.
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02-17-2019, 06:13 PM | #819 |
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What did the duck detective say to his partner?
Let's quack this case!
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02-18-2019, 01:47 AM | #820 |
Timed Out - Permanent
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Pun 1
I went to that new Mary Poppins restaurant last night.
Super cauliflower cheese, the lobster was atrocious. |
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