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12-13-2009, 10:26 PM
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#1 |
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Mentally Delicious
How Do You Identify?:
Queer High Femme, thank you very much Preferred Pronoun?:
Mme. Relationship Status:
Married to JD. 
Join Date: Oct 2009
Location: Atlanta
Posts: 10,446
Thanks: 5,995
Thanked 42,834 Times in 7,833 Posts
Rep Power: 21474862  |
What Cracked You Up Today?
Ok, I looked and couldnt find this thread so if it exists already I apologize.
I just cracked up because Jack accidentally pushed the wrong #s on the tv remote and it asked her if she wanted to pay per view a show called "Filthy Suck Sluts 2". She yelled at me "BAAAAABBBEEEE, you need to get this porno shit OFF OF MY FUCKING TV" so she proceeds to flail her arms and push multiple buttons and another show pops up. This time its "Big Horny Wet Asses 7" She yelled again, "BAAABBBEEEEEEE, there's some WET ASSES and shit on the tv and I WANT IT OFF OF THERE" and by this time, I was laughing so hard that I could barely see the tv anyway. So she whips her head around at me while I was bent over laughing behind her and she says, "BAAABBBEEEEEE, isnt there a way to block this shit? I dont want the family coming over here at Christmas and being embarrassed by Filthy Fisting Whores or Slutty Gooch Suckers...I mean, THIS SHIT IS NOT IN THE FUCKING HOLIDAY SPIRIT" ROTFLMAOOOO |
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12-13-2009, 10:34 PM
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#2 | |
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Timed Out
How Do You Identify?:
Diva Preferred Pronoun?:
Diva 
Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Chez Diva
Posts: 11,879
Thanks: 9,263
Thanked 17,175 Times in 5,238 Posts
Rep Power: 0    |
Quote:
Yeah. You don't want the family to see "Big Horny Wet Asses 7" because it's really not as good as "Big Horny Wet Asses 3" and "Big Horny Wet Asses 4". Damned sequels. 
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12-14-2009, 07:20 AM
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#3 |
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Senior Member
How Do You Identify?:
The original lime-twisted femme Preferred Pronoun?:
I answer to most things, especially lesbian. Relationship Status:
Still loving my Mare ;) 
 Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: New Jersey
Posts: 4,683
Thanks: 1,343
Thanked 11,425 Times in 2,978 Posts
Rep Power: 21474854 |
https://www.bordergatewayprotocol.ne...imations/1.swf
Warning - explicit language. Courtesy of an old school buddy of mine who at times, makes me "miss" home. LOL
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12-14-2009, 08:51 AM
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#4 |
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Member
How Do You Identify?:
Multifaceted Queer Femme Preferred Pronoun?:
It's a secret Relationship Status:
And from my lips hye drew the hallelujah 
Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Somewhere over the rainbow clicking my heels
Posts: 732
Thanks: 2,646
Thanked 1,725 Times in 521 Posts
Rep Power: 8635874 |
....when I saw this picture:
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"Being Femme means my feminism and my femininity walk hand in hand
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12-14-2009, 10:47 AM
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#5 |
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Member
How Do You Identify?:
Just me Preferred Pronoun?:
she, her, Relationship Status:
Single 
Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: TN
Posts: 160
Thanks: 115
Thanked 134 Times in 54 Posts
Rep Power: 1725535 |
Ok Medusa that was great! Thank you!
 ((this gal doens't look like she's freaking, just laughing real hard to me O_O)) i so needed that this morning
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=kassy= r/t Mishy =Love shared is love doubled.... pain shared is pain cut in half..........share your life with me, and i'll share mine with you... |
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12-15-2009, 12:18 AM
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#6 |
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Member
How Do You Identify?:
Butch Preferred Pronoun?:
Don't matter Relationship Status:
Meh Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Why is it hot in here and what am I doing in this hand basket
Posts: 151
Thanks: 1
Thanked 67 Times in 27 Posts
Rep Power: 219424 |
Me (talking to a friend at work yesterday) - How are you gentlemen?
Him - All your beer are belong to us. Me - Oh noes! Not my beer in a bucket! Him - Watch it, or else ceiling cat will take all beer AND buckets away from you. Me - So, I CAN'T has cheezeburger? Him - No, however you can bake me more of those pumpkin cookies. Me - THEN can I has cheezeburger? Him - I thought you wanted beer? Me - Not really, I have some PBR in my fridge still. |
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12-15-2009, 06:45 PM
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#7 |
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Practically Lives Here
How Do You Identify?:
Queer Stone Femme Girl of the Unicorn Variety Preferred Pronoun?:
She, as in 'She's a GEM' 
Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: The roads are narrow here
Posts: 36,631
Thanks: 182,485
Thanked 108,578 Times in 25,685 Posts
Rep Power: 21474885 |
I crack up constantly at the stuff NJFemmie finds to torment me with. Sure, she posts it "for everyone" but I secretly know it's just to make me
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12-15-2009, 07:03 PM
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#8 |
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Timed Out - TOS Drama
How Do You Identify?:
.. Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: ..
Posts: 3,471
Thanks: 292
Thanked 2,646 Times in 1,293 Posts
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My friend Mel who got drunk and wasted and passed out at my place. Her husband's all pissed off. Asshole. Ha!
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12-16-2009, 03:46 PM
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#9 |
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Member
How Do You Identify?:
Ftm - Male- exfemale Preferred Pronoun?:
He’s Him Relationship Status:
Has a gf 
Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Philadelphia pa
Posts: 889
Thanks: 251
Thanked 760 Times in 219 Posts
Rep Power: 4529749 |
roflmccao
ok so this morning i get this text message from daughter that says:
Text: Hey don't say anything but guess who is still together after all the shit between them.......  and then nothing so i get nosey and start texting '  who.. who.......  her response: your buttcheeks  i have been laffing all day
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Dean Thoreau
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04-02-2010, 12:50 AM
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#10 |
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Member
How Do You Identify?:
Butch Preferred Pronoun?:
Neither feel 100% correct Relationship Status:
Chocolate Creme Brulee Join Date: Oct 2009
Location: Little Rock, AR
Posts: 158
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Thanked 305 Times in 83 Posts
Rep Power: 54141 |
Lookin' out my back patio door tonight and seein' one of our friendly neighborhood raccoons chillin' on my patio eatin' a big 'ol grilled STEAK!
 Where the hell did he get a STEAK? And why did he bring it to MY back patio to eat it?  I guess some of the other neighbors are feedin' him and his friends better than I am!  Not sure if the neighborhood cats were happy that he wasn't eatin' their catfood I put out for them, or jealous that he had a steak!  Wonderin' what his opossum friends might bring to the party? 
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04-02-2010, 05:01 PM
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#11 |
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Practically Lives Here
How Do You Identify?:
Queer Stone Femme Girl of the Unicorn Variety Preferred Pronoun?:
She, as in 'She's a GEM'
Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: The roads are narrow here
Posts: 36,631
Thanks: 182,485
Thanked 108,578 Times in 25,685 Posts
Rep Power: 21474885 |
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04-02-2010, 05:10 PM
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#12 | |
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Senior Member
How Do You Identify?:
Fiery, Sassy, Tough As Nails, Femme Tomboy Preferred Pronoun?:
She Relationship Status:
I am your favorite hello and hardest goodbye. Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: NC & CO
Posts: 4,789
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Thanked 12,129 Times in 3,762 Posts
Rep Power: 21474855 |
Quote:
What happens if you don't have "saggy bums"? Jus' askin'.... cause I "ain't got NO bums at all!!" Flat as a pancake it is!! ... guess I'm SOL.... AGAIN! Bummer!! I'm just plain BUMMED OUT!! |
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04-02-2010, 05:39 PM
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#13 | |
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Practically Lives Here
How Do You Identify?:
Queer Stone Femme Girl of the Unicorn Variety Preferred Pronoun?:
She, as in 'She's a GEM'
Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: The roads are narrow here
Posts: 36,631
Thanks: 182,485
Thanked 108,578 Times in 25,685 Posts
Rep Power: 21474885 |
Quote:
Last edited by Gemme; 04-02-2010 at 05:41 PM. |
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04-02-2010, 06:25 PM
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#14 |
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Timed Out
How Do You Identify?:
Mr. Prickly Porcupine Preferred Pronoun?:
Butch - Hy, Hym, Hys Relationship Status:
She has softened My quills Join Date: Dec 2009
Location: Permanently Banned 8/8/2011
Posts: 4,880
Thanks: 6,221
Thanked 5,264 Times in 2,732 Posts
Rep Power: 0 |
Cyndi Lauper..
"Muggles are wizards.. Muggles are wizards" |
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04-02-2010, 06:47 PM
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#15 |
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Member
How Do You Identify?:
~ Preferred Pronoun?:
~ Relationship Status:
~ Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: ~
Posts: 424
Thanks: 461
Thanked 466 Times in 176 Posts
Rep Power: 274205 |
my never ending faith in humanity is now a source of hilarity to me. ripped off to the tune of $300, almost out of coffee, and definitely out of ideas...
all i can do is laugh what else is there?  |
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04-02-2010, 06:48 PM
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#16 | |
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Senior Member
How Do You Identify?:
Butch Relationship Status:
Holding My Red Circle 
Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Louisiana
Posts: 1,811
Thanks: 3,051
Thanked 3,962 Times in 1,230 Posts
Rep Power: 21474852 |
Quote:
Damn! That sucks!
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Let There Be Cowgirls |
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04-02-2010, 08:18 PM
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#17 |
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Senior Member
How Do You Identify?:
Since You Need A Label. Butch Relationship Status:
Still Dreaming Of My Happily Ever After Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Arlington Texas
Posts: 4,009
Thanks: 4,950
Thanked 5,364 Times in 1,941 Posts
Rep Power: 21474856 |
So I have a new apt manager and she is HOT... Ive been by before and we talked for awhile and we both love dogs... She showed me hers well her dog LOL and asked me to bring Simon by. So today I decided on my day off to walk down with him to the office.
We walk in and she is cooing and loving on him complimenting on what a wonderful sweet cute dog he is... And then Simon does it he sticks his nose right in between her tits and buries his face there... I start pulling on the leash calling to him Simon stop son... She is giggling and saying its alright, and Im thinking in my head you cant blame the dog he is smart after all LOL A few minutes go by we talk as Im paying rent, and she comes to love on him some more as we are sitting on the couch in the office... he puts his head right back between her tits... ( she has a low cut shirt on) this time without thinking I take my hand and go to move his head and grab her tit. Embarassed as all get out I jump up and start heading for the door and trip ono Simons leash... Im ready to just dig a hole and bury myself... She is making sure Im ok and with a smile on her face she says, all this because you touched my tit ? LOL we both start laughing and I explain I wasnt trying to get fresh with her I was trying to correct my dogs inappropriateness... LOL |
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04-02-2010, 09:19 PM
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#18 | |
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Senior Member
How Do You Identify?:
Fiery, Sassy, Tough As Nails, Femme Tomboy Preferred Pronoun?:
She Relationship Status:
I am your favorite hello and hardest goodbye. Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: NC & CO
Posts: 4,789
Thanks: 4,615
Thanked 12,129 Times in 3,762 Posts
Rep Power: 21474855 |
Quote:
You, Gemmie, CRACK ME UP!!! |
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04-04-2010, 10:05 PM
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#19 |
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Mentally Delicious
How Do You Identify?:
Queer High Femme, thank you very much Preferred Pronoun?:
Mme. Relationship Status:
Married to JD.
Join Date: Oct 2009
Location: Atlanta
Posts: 10,446
Thanks: 5,995
Thanked 42,834 Times in 7,833 Posts
Rep Power: 21474862 |
Waking up this morning to Jackhammer sucking on my back
.gif "Say What?")
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04-05-2010, 07:20 AM
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#20 |
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Infamous Member
How Do You Identify?:
femme Relationship Status:
attached Join Date: Dec 2009
Location: .
Posts: 6,896
Thanks: 29,046
Thanked 13,114 Times in 3,388 Posts
Rep Power: 21474857 |
thanks for reminding me, violaine!
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I'm misunderestimated. 
Linear Mode
