Are butches really a dying breed?

[MissItalianDiva]

I agree with Toughy. Here in the Bay there is definitely not a lack of butch identified folks or butch energy. I personally think Toughy hits a pretty valid point. I see and hear of folks all the time expecting to go into the bar or gay club wanting to meet folks. How well can you possibly interact with someone in that type of environment.

After reading this thread I am even more grateful to be living in the Bay Area. Of and as for the Whole Foods color I think it is green...?

Also I think it is important to ask ourselves when trying to date a specific type of person who identifies a certain way do we truly know what WE are looking for or are we looking for a "stereotype". What's on the surface is not always what is on the core of someone. Just a thought

[Breathless]

I feel like I should clarify my comment about imposter in a butches clothing.. I agree, and am grateful that butches come in all body types, styles, long hair, short hair.. my comment was more in reference to the stereotypical attitude that a butch is protective, polite, gentlemanly, mannered, respectful etc, vs a set physical ideal of what makes identity. Being butch or how ever you label or dont label yourself comes from the heart... agreed

[Rockinonahigh]

I hope us butches are going out of style,I do know hear we (at home) dont have a large bf communits infact its fue and far between.I've met some femmes on line and on the planet but not any where I live,but at my age 64 and counting down to 65 the dateing pool is slim to nun.

[Breathless]

A classy human being is never out of style

Originally Posted by Rockinonahigh

I hope us butches are going out of style,I do know hear we (at home) dont have a large bf communits infact its fue and far between.I've met some femmes on line and on the planet but not any where I live,but at my age 64 and counting down to 65 the dateing pool is slim to nun.

[Martina]

i used to carry a wallet and not a purse.

Was i . . . *gasp* . . . a butch impostor?

[Scuba]

Originally Posted by Martina

i used to carry a wallet and not a purse.

Was i . . . *gasp* . . . a butch impostor?

**plays shocking music**

A butch imposter? Say it's not soooooooooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!

[Scuba]

I'm still alive...just sayin

[Library_girl]

Originally Posted by Quintease

Yes but did individual lesbians have a choice? Invariably no. Butches all looked butch and femmes all looked femme. It was a very heteronormative and rigid way of establishing identity, particularly if you wanted to get laid. I imagine many lesbians today would be stumped were they to be asked to pick a side (remembering that dress back then also corresponded to sexual activity far more than it does today).

Excellent point!!! See, I love your posts.

[StoneOne]

I will never give up on forever .....
I do believe in taking time to find the one and spending forever together....
I do believe in forgetting the small stuff dont sweat it .......
I do believe in partnerships it takes 2 to tango good and bad...
I do believe U must pay attention dont get to comfortable .......
I do believe U must learn to forgive in your heart or pay the piper......
I dont believe U fill a void just because it is there......
I do believe if u let it go and it comes back it's forever if not it never was........
I do believe if u make a commitment u should stand by it......
I do believe there is someone for everyone .....
I do believe u have just to find one another .......

this is prolly not the right thread for this post but well ya know......

[mariamma]

It sure would make it easier on me if Femmes put a big old "F" on their forehead so I could spot them!

I usually give butch women a big, open smile, look them deep in the eyes and say "Hi". If one neuron is working, she and everyone around her will know I'm a femme saying Hi to a butch woman.
cuz I'm subtle like that

[mariamma]

Originally Posted by Breathless

I feel like I should clarify my comment about imposter in a butches clothing.. I agree, and am grateful that butches come in all body types, styles, long hair, short hair.. my comment was more in reference to the stereotypical attitude that a butch is protective, polite, gentlemanly, mannered, respectful etc, vs a set physical ideal of what makes identity. Being butch or how ever you label or dont label yourself comes from the heart... agreed

I like your definition of a butch Breathless. They do exist but in too few numbers IMO Some are ID'd as queer/bois/etc. now and will bust out that shell as they evolve in life. Some current young butches will evolve into queer/studs/etc. Still not enough dashing, charming, gentlemynly butches in the world for this sensual, curious, complimentary femme. Won't someone tell the straights to make more butch babies

[Breathless]

I have a butch baby for a daughter..lol.. she appears very femme, however it is deceiving Dont nobody get any ideas.. she is 16

And thank you Amma

[BullDog]

When I was a little kid I asked my Dad if girls could be astronauts (there weren't any girl astronauts then). He said yes.

The best way to ensure there will be more butches is to set a good example, be a mentor when asked, and to continue to let the world know that women and females can be any way they want to be. We are not restricted by any sexist or gender stereotypes. If some call themselves by names other than butch that's all good too.

[wetfromashower]

As small as the state of Delaware is... There is no lack of Butches here... and in a three hour radius you have many states with unlimited butches... (de,nj,pa,md,va,dc,ny... to name a few states) just my two cents...

[Apocalipstic]

Originally Posted by Martina

i used to carry a wallet and not a purse.

Was i . . . *gasp* . . . a butch impostor?

OMG, me too lolololol
but I could never fnd my stuff

[starryeyes]

Maybe it has something to do with social media? I am a youngin' so I can't talk about "back in the day" but there seems to be a hell of a lot more social influence on lesbians now than ever. With shows like, The L Word, The Real L Word, Curl Girls, shows on LOGO, Ellen, Rachel Maddow, etc, everyone is a soft butch or androgynous. I am racking my brain, and can not think of one strong butch role model in social media today that is not looked down upon.

"Back in the Day", from what I have read, and heard from people who were there, Butch Femme was a social scene and Butches were taken under the wings of other Butches and mentored/supported and it was an inclusive group with relatively NO influence from mainstream America. Now with all of this external influential, pressure and America's stereotypes of "what lesbians should look like and be like" it kinda makes sense that the newer generation is changing and there are not as many "Butches" (in the way we are describing here) around anymore. It sucks, but maybe it's just evolution.

[TimilDeeps]

Originally Posted by wetfromashower

As small as the state of Delaware is... There is no lack of Butches here... and in a three hour radius you have many states with unlimited butches... (de,nj,pa,md,va,dc,ny... to name a few states) just my two cents...

oh so true your royal wetness. and as someone who lives in PA, I can tell ya it is Butch central.

[kittygrrl]

not so much are butches a dying breed but i'm quite sure OS butches are rare everywhere

[TimilDeeps]

Originally Posted by kittygrrl

not so much are butches a dying breed but i'm quite sure OS butches are rare everywhere

Then again, we've always been a rare breed

[Christy51274]

Originally Posted by dancer611

I've heard time and time again that butches are "dying out," that there are tons more femmes than butches and that that trend will likely continue. I haven't been out long and don't know much about the overall community. Is this true, or a myth that people in femme-heavy areas like to throw around?

@Dancer:

I'm so glad you've brought this up. Whenever I go out, femmes are the majority. I live near Baltimore and haven't checked out the D.C. scene yet, but butches, FtM trans guys, etc. are rare indeed! Oh well...I'm not really seeking them out, but would be nice to see more of them around.