Have you met or know a psychopath/sociopath?

[Nat]

Originally Posted by Yellow band

Every time I see this thread pop up, I think Scott Peterson.

Is he a sociopath or a narcissist? Can you be both?

[Reader]

Originally Posted by Nat

Is he a sociopath or a narcissist? Can you be both?

...it sure seems like it, sadly.

[Tawse]

Originally Posted by Hunter Green

The thing about most sociopaths, those with personality disorders or character disorders and the like is that they either do not know they are ill, or they know but are excellent liars without a conscience. They lie even to themselves.

As someone dear to me used to say "Crazy people don't know they're crazy. It's up to you to avoid them."

Couple of things - God I hope you don't include BiPolars in your category of Personality / Character Disorders (don't believe you do, but you never know! lol)


And I would argue every person who lives and breathes is innately skilled at lying to themselves...

[Quintease]

This is a really well written book actually.

<-- picked it up today

[Reader]

Originally Posted by Tawse

Couple of things - God I hope you don't include BiPolars in your category of Personality / Character Disorders (don't believe you do, but you never know! lol)


And I would argue every person who lives and breathes is innately skilled at lying to themselves...

Hi Tawse, no, I do not believe that Bi-Polar is a Personality or Character Disorder. But, I'm not a diagnostic clinician and I don't feel like looking it up. But, I'm fairly sure it isn't.

You are 100% correct that 'every person who lives and breathes is innately skilled at lying to themselves.'

You are correct.

[MsTinkerbelly]

Originally Posted by Hunter Green

The thing about most sociopaths, those with personality disorders or character disorders and the like is that they either do not know they are ill, or they know but are excellent liars without a conscience. They lie even to themselves.

As someone dear to me used to say "Crazy people don't know they're crazy. It's up to you to avoid them."

I think that unless this is your field of specialty you should be very careful making generalizations. You are coming across as extremely offensive to someone who struggles daily with BPD, is not without a conscience, and is not a liar. I do see that you say "most"; was that an attempt to to not be called out on this tripe?

[MsTinkerbelly]

Originally Posted by Hunter Green

Hi Tawse, no, I do not believe that Bi-Polar is a Personality or Character Disorder. But, I'm not a diagnostic clinician and I don't feel like looking it up. But, I'm fairly sure it isn't.

You are 100% correct that 'every person who lives and breathes is innately skilled at lying to themselves.'

You are correct.

As someone who has run mental health residential facilities, I can say with 100 percent certainty that bipolar illness is a chemical imbalance in the brain..nothing more nothing less.

[Sassy]

My BFF has bipolar. With therapy and meds it is treatable and manageable. Though, it often takes the health practitioners time to find the correct medicinal cocktail for that person's particular brain chemistry. ... Also, it usually takes several years of ups and downs before the patient finally resolves that treatment is a lifetime commitment. (The most difficult part of treating bipolar is their lack of compliance.)

[Tawse]

Originally Posted by Sassy

My BFF has bipolar. With therapy and meds it is treatable and manageable. Though, it often takes the health practitioners time to find the correct medicinal cocktail for that person's particular brain chemistry. ... Also, it usually takes several years of ups and downs before the patient finally resolves that treatment is a lifetime commitment. (The most difficult part of treating bipolar is their lack of compliance.)

Am currently on year... crap I forgot... uhhhh 2! Spent 1.5 years with gradually increasing anxiety that we finally figured out was due to one of the meds I was taking. Have been anxiety free now for... 4 months! yay! (kinda scary thinking one tiny pill can make your brain think the way I was thinking for that year and a half... very very scary actually)

And yes - compliance can be tough... it's amazing what the brain will try to convince you of.

it's funny - I was reading an article about wheat allergies just yesterday and one of the things mentioned was that allergies to wheat may cause some symptoms that may be linked to a person having mental illness. interesting - problem is some people with mental illness may read that and decide they don't need their meds all they need to do is stop eating wheat...

But anyway - I now return to our regularly scheduled socio/psychopathic discussion... sorry for the jack

[Sun]

I actually came back to this thread to see if I could pull down my post and realize that I cant do that. The woman that I posted about is someone that I love and the initial "meeting" was indeed traumatizing for me and it colored my future behavior in a negative way. I'm not proud of that. In the past I had only shared this story with a few close friends because I needed support. Ive never put this story out on a public website before, nor have I ever posted a negative word about this woman in a way that would cause her humiliation.

The reality of my story is that yes this did in fact happen to me but I have to admit that the woman who did this was losing control of her life and was pre "nervous breakdown" when this all occured. She was looking for a way out of a life that she felt trapped in. When I posted about my experience I had been triggered and never thought about hurting her if she ever saw the post. Huge mistake because I do not set out to intentionally hurt anyone. Sometimes I am emotionally "rectionary" and then regret my behavior later on. In fact I am sure that if the woman that I wrote about who I refer to as "M" (no relationship to her real name) could take back every cruel thing that she did to me back then, she would. Ive had a hard lesson recently in being unforgiving and it stings. I need to learn to be "more" forgiving. Especially with people that I love. Holding on to resentment has not served me well, in fact it has only helped to destroy a reltionship with a woman that I love.

I'm not a victim, I'm a survivor in many realms and thats just keeping it real. Because I was hurt by an event does not give me permission to hurt others, including the woman that hurt me. Some switch in my brain flipped and I became more detached whem someone would do me wrong and let anger become my defense mechanism. In my centered, best self, I am a peaceful happy person and I want simple things out of life. I want a relationship that is healthy, a family life and a future that is devoid of drama of any sort. In that space, I am willing to do all of the hard work that comes with these goals. Holding on to the past..especially the past that I wrote about is not what I want for my life.

By posting my very personal story that left me very wounded I put myself back into a victim space and did more damage than good. Ive now committed to leaving the past in the past and not resurrecting this story ever again. The woman did this to me was in great pain, she was suffering, she had no way out. Perhaps by finding me and being loved even after I found out the truth, I was throwing her a lifeline. If this had not occured and I had not reached out to her even in her false identity perhaps she would have taken her own life and that would have been a great loss because she is a beautiful person who was just looking to be loved and feeling trapped in a marriage that was unhealthy. It was better to have met her along the way and know her than to have never met her and never have known her. We all make mistakes..I have made many. I have hurt the woman that I love because I was hurt in the past. This is not something that I am proud of and it is hard to admit. I justified lying because I was lied to. I did not feel that I could trust anyone anymore because my trust was violated. This is not "right action" and I am not cut out for hanging on to negativity. What I love is laughter and fun, light spiritually connected living. As a result of the past I screwed up something beautiful and I can only hope that one day I too will be forgiven and have another chance to make things right.

As I say, we all make mistakes and for me, posting something negative for the world to see, even though I protected her identity, was just wrong. It is a beautiful thing to be loved and to love. Sometimes we are imperfect and need help, counseling, care for depression or illness. That does not make someone a bad person.

Thanks for reading along.

In Peace and love,

Sun

[MzzBehaving]

sociopath can be a narcissist then yes I sure do know one..

[moxie]

Narcissistic Personality Disorder is not the same as sociopathy or psychopathy. Being diagnosed with a personality disorder does not put a person in the same realm as someone with sociopathy or psychopathy.
Personality Disorders are not the same as Bipolar Disorder.

[Glenn]

Originally Posted by puregrrl

Narcissistic Personality Disorder is not the same as sociopathy or psychopathy. Being diagnosed with a personality disorder does not put a person in the same realm as someone with sociopathy or psychopathy.
Personality Disorders are not the same as Bipolar Disorder.

I dunno puregrr, is'nt antisocial a personality disorder also? I always thought of it as being on a spectrum with a sociopath being the ultimate narcissistic personality. popcorn- bs in psych.

[moxie]

Originally Posted by popcorninthesofa

I dunno puregrr, is'nt antisocial a personality disorder also? I always thought of it as being on a spectrum with a sociopath being the ultimate narcissistic personality. popcorn- bs in psych.

Yes, there is an Antisocial Personality Disorder, but there are also others, 9 more if I remember correctly (I don't have my DSM at home). They are grouped into diagnostic clusters based on traits. And just because someone has been diagnosed with a personality disorder it doesn't mean they have psychopathic/sociopathic traits. It's kinda like saying that just because someone has auditory hallucinations, they must have schizophrenia.

There is a lot of stigma with mental illness. There are so many people with mental health problems that don't get help because of the judgment and assumptions people make.

When I tell people I am therapist, one of the first things I am most always told/asked is "Oh, that must be scary. Have you ever been assaulted/hurt/threatened/creeped out/etc etc.?" That's because of the stigma.

I could go on forever about it, but I'll shut up.

[imperfect_cupcake]

also, not all psychopaths kill/attack people. There's a great program on this how nature plus nurture = how it manifests. One of the people who found the "gene" and brain print activity map for psychopathy did a test on his family and found that he carried the gene AND the brain map print. He had to sit down and think about how this is reflected in his behaviour. But he has no violent tendencies. He chalks that up to having a good childhood with no abuse and happy, well functioning parents.

It's on Horizon. "the moral molecule" - I am irritated with their sensationalising of it (using the word "evil") but other than that irritation, I thought it was good.

[julieisafemme]

Thank you very much for this post. I have OCD and it is often troubling to me when people try to diagnose someone else or assume things about me because I have a mental illness. The stigma is very real. I am very open about my OCD because I am not ashamed of it and I want people to understand that stereotypes about it and other mental illness so rarely touch on the real pain that they cause.

Originally Posted by puregrrl

Yes, there is an Antisocial Personality Disorder, but there are also others, 9 more if I remember correctly (I don't have my DSM at home). They are grouped into diagnostic clusters based on traits. And just because someone has been diagnosed with a personality disorder it doesn't mean they have psychopathic/sociopathic traits. It's kinda like saying that just because someone has auditory hallucinations, they must have schizophrenia.

There is a lot of stigma with mental illness. There are so many people with mental health problems that don't get help because of the judgment and assumptions people make.

When I tell people I am therapist, one of the first things I am most always told/asked is "Oh, that must be scary. Have you ever been assaulted/hurt/threatened/creeped out/etc etc.?" That's because of the stigma.

I could go on forever about it, but I'll shut up.

[WolfyOne]

Yes, I grew up with one
He's in prison now for murders he says he didn't commit with 3 others
It was long ago, the others have all been put to death
They never had enough on him to put him to death, but he is serving a life sentence for being involved
They all said he was their ringleader
He's the kind of person that can lie to your face, believe what he says and make you believe it, too
Sadly he's been that way forever

[Soon]

IT HAPPENED TO ME: I WAS MARRIED TO A SOCIOPATH

[Quintease]

Originally Posted by HowSoonIsNow

IT HAPPENED TO ME: I WAS MARRIED TO A SOCIOPATH

My God.

It scares me that I dated a psycopath/sociopath, I will never know which one she was. To this day it freaks me out that I put myself in danger for so long, unable to see what was happening right in front of my face.

I feel sorry for whoever's life she is messing up now. Really really sorry.

[laruss]

My biological father is a sociopath and for years I actually thought I was the damaged one, the unlovable one. He was really good at not taking responsibility for anything and turning it around on to others.

It took only a few months of his living with us when my children were young for me to figure out it wasn't me, it was him. He is so ill I can never have him in my life again.

I am quite sure in his new life that no one would even know I existed, and that is probably for the best.