Neurodiversity

[Andrew, Jr.]

Yes it is. I never understood why people would say that to me that I was hiding. Sheesh.

[Apocalipstic]

Originally Posted by Andrew, Jr.

Yes it is. I never understood why people would say that to me that I was hiding. Sheesh.

Ha, I do hide.

[violaine]

maybe sometime down the road, we could have a chat night? there is a group [WLS- weight loss support ] who meet once a week.

what do you think?

[Kimbo]

Apocalipstic I am very curious about how you came about being diagnosed later in life. I have been really struggling for quite some time now, because I am in full blown butch-o-pause everything is getting blamed on that. I read in here and am amazed at how much I relate to things. I know that many are diagnosed earlier in life. I have ADD, diagnosed by my clinical Dr but I am considering seeing a Psychiatrist. When I had my physical last month my Dr again keeps wanting to prescribe meds for some of the pausal symptoms I am having but every time I do something like this is makes my head worse. I have lost much of my reading comprehension, my thought process is really garbled, I struggle communicating and keeping my head from going in circles and if I am tired, forget communication. This is really becoming an issue for me—and the frustration I feel trying to communicate just makes things worse and adds to my anxiety level. My retention of data is nonexistent and people often have to tell me things several times before it sticks in the ol’ gray matter. It feels like I am losing the battle. How did your diagnosis come about and by who, if I may ask? I do IT for a living—data and detail are mandatory parts of my job and I’m really struggling at work and they have noticed. I went from getting the employee of the month 3 months in a row to the worst evaluation I’ve had in 30+ years of employment.

I don’t mind taking meds if needed but I need to know that I am taking the right meds for what is going on in my head—taking meds normally given to treat people with bipolar for my night sweats just doesn’t seem right. Due to past health issues I am unable to take any HRT but I see the impact of my hormones on my ADD and really I am wondering if there isn’t something deeper in my brain that should be evaluated. When I spoke with my Dr about this her response was—call your insurance company and see what they say. That response was quite frustrating to me.

I’m very curious as to how you all came about your diagnosis.

And the apologizing thing---oy vey! Raising my hand!

[Kimbo]

Originally Posted by violaine

maybe sometime down the road, we could have a chat night? there is a group [WLS- weight loss support ] who meet once a week.

what do you think?

Great idea!

[Apocalipstic]

Originally Posted by Kimbo

Apocalipstic I am very curious about how you came about being diagnosed later in life. I have been really struggling for quite some time now, because I am in full blown butch-o-pause everything is getting blamed on that. I read in here and am amazed at how much I relate to things. I know that many are diagnosed earlier in life. I have ADD, diagnosed by my clinical Dr but I am considering seeing a Psychiatrist. When I had my physical last month my Dr again keeps wanting to prescribe meds for some of the pausal symptoms I am having but every time I do something like this is makes my head worse. I have lost much of my reading comprehension, my thought process is really garbled, I struggle communicating and keeping my head from going in circles and if I am tired, forget communication. This is really becoming an issue for me—and the frustration I feel trying to communicate just makes things worse and adds to my anxiety level. My retention of data is nonexistent and people often have to tell me things several times before it sticks in the ol’ gray matter. It feels like I am losing the battle. How did your diagnosis come about and by who, if I may ask? I do IT for a living—data and detail are mandatory parts of my job and I’m really struggling at work and they have noticed. I went from getting the employee of the month 3 months in a row to the worst evaluation I’ve had in 30+ years of employment.

I don’t mind taking meds if needed but I need to know that I am taking the right meds for what is going on in my head—taking meds normally given to treat people with bipolar for my night sweats just doesn’t seem right. Do to past health issues I am unable to take any HRT but I see the impact of my hormones on my ADD and really I am wondering if there isn’t something deeper in my brain that should be evaluated. When I spoke with my Dr about this her response was—call your insurance company and see what they say. That response was quite frustrating to me.

I’m very curious as to how you all came about your diagnosis.

And the apologizing thing---oy vey! Raising my hand!

I began to research after my G/F pointed out how much I fall. She wondered if something was wrong. Things just jump out of my hands and off shelves around me. As I read I noticed other things like I have ticks and stims (like flapping when I get overwhelmed or rubbing my thumb and index fingers together in circles and other things.)

A Urologist suggested it might be MS, based on some other symptoms and I visited an neurologist who thought it might be just being fat or could be neurological. I then visited a psychiatrist who had me take some tests and talk for a really long time (hours) with a Nurse Practitioner and together they thought based on my past and so forth that AS. fibromialgia and PTSD might be the explanation (I had been diagnosed with PTSD in my 20's).

It did not seem like a very exact science for me and to be honest, I am still unsure if that is an accurate diagnosis. I sort of think everyone is at a different place on the neurological scale and we all experience things differently.

I do take medication and have found it very helpful. I also have significantly changed my footwear and clothing which helps with stability/mobility and am in therapy. I'm sure being Butch you have not been wearing unstable shoes, but for me it was a huge deal to change to solid sensible footwear (ugh).

Without medication I am a huge mess.

I hope this helps, feel free to ask me anything on this thread or in PM.

[Andrew, Jr.]

Per Belle, This is what I have come up with when I know I am out of control. Now, please bear with me because this is sort of a rush job.

Those who torment me, and others who have neuro. diseases/disorders I believe they do so because they have some resentment or envy of me/others. Why? I have no clue. Who really knows what is going on in anyone's mind these days. Why don't children help the elderly cross a busy road anymore?

Those who are master manipulators like my bio-father, who also torments me, I believe it gives him/them a "one up". Like a power ranking on earth or something. It boosts his/their ego to put someone down. He/they are very demeaning, and aggressive about how he/they go about it. It can be with the words used, repetition of a certain behavior, or knowing that what he/they are doing is intentionally inflicting emotional pain on me or another human being. For example, my father always telling my sisters that they were fat, ugly, and stupid. To this very day, they always remember that those 3 horrible words he uttered. So when I say words hurt. I mean, words hurt.

We all see this by military hazing, political slams, and workplace bullying, even in school bullying now. Heck, kids today now carry knives and guns. I never thought I would see this during my lifetime.

The effects of this are social isolation, constant criticism to the point of believing what your tormentors are saying to and about you (Stockholm Syndrome), the lies and rumors become true to you. You loose sight of who and what you are. For example, in some sick way my father thought that beating me, and locking me in a closet were going to make me a straight woman. Boy was he wrong.

The end result can be more isolation, loneliness, depression, anxiety, low self-esteem, and even suicide. And nobody deserves that. Nobody.

I take meds on a reg. basis. I also have some ticks. All are doable. Life is good. But when someone threatens me with criticism, or demons, it sends me right over the edge. I also find it quite rude when someone bad mouths my late sister and late younger brother. They are not here to defend themselves. I can only do the best I can. I think until you yourself bury your own siblings, you have no room to talk.


Kimbo,

I was diagnosed very early with my learning disabilities thanks to my oldest sister. I failed in school. In fact, I failed anything that was organized. It made no sense to me. I also am colorblind. I would make an appt with a neurologist, and also have testing done by a therapist. See what the results come out to be. Mine were pretty much the same as Apoc.

I wish you peace.

Andrew

[ruthie14]

Ok ...Deep breath.. I just took that sensitive test and scored a 25. Is this a surprise to me, no.. I have been told I am an empath...so yes I feel things greatly. That it relates to asbergers and the autism spectrum. Yes and no. Wow.. a lot to process for me right now. The funny thing is, is that I have been working with children who have asbergers and autism for more than 20 years. It always seems I have had a connection to the children in my care that is a rare gift. I seem to understand what they need without words... and with all kids for that matter, but in particular with my clients,students and friends with this "different wiring." I hope you don't mind if I join your group here.. I find your openess and honesty a wonderful gift. You all are very inspiring to me. Thanks for who you are..

[suebee]

Reading through the posts - such a jigsaw puzzle understanding ourselves! It's all overwhelming at times. Just wanted to let everyone know that I'm following along. Don't post often 'cause quite frankly I find it too much to deal with. But I'm lurking. Like the idea of a chat night.

Sue

[violaine]

has anyone ever told you during a heated moment that you have a 'mental deficit" ?

[Liam]

Originally Posted by violaine

has anyone ever told you during a heated moment that you have a 'mental deficit" ?

I was told that I was, "damaged goods," I think they were inferring that.

[violaine]

[QUOTE=Andrew, Jr.;57809]Per Belle, This is what I have come up with when I know I am out of control. Now, please bear with me because this is sort of a rush job.

Those who torment me, and others who have neuro. diseases/disorders I believe they do so because they have some resentment or envy of me/others. Why? I have no clue. Who really knows what is going on in anyone's mind these days. Why don't children help the elderly cross a busy road anymore?

thank you, mr. andrew for opening up a discusson about people who do not understand where AT wiring/needs/coping-skills, et c may be coming from- and do not get it [or may not ever get it].

Those who are master manipulators like my bio-father, who also torments me, I believe it gives him/them a "one up". Like a power ranking on earth or something. It boosts his/their ego to put someone down. He/they are very demeaning, and aggressive about how he/they go about it. It can be with the words used, repetition of a certain behavior, or knowing that what he/they are doing is intentionally inflicting emotional pain on me or another human being. For example, my father always telling my sisters that they were fat, ugly, and stupid. To this very day, they always remember that those 3 horrible words he uttered. So when I say words hurt. I mean, words hurt.

yes, they do for a lot of people. i've heard name-calling and/or been accused of having a- 'mental deficit' ; heard phrases like - 'what is 'wrong' with you? and 'you know what you are doing. does that mean there is an insinuation of deliberation on my end of playing a game? ha. i am like a big yellow school bus coming down the road - nothing is hidden with my intentions. however, when my truth is disputed, there's physical/bodily over-reaction, and comments made like 'mental deficit', and so on, i think that's going into a serious button-pushing zone.

We all see this by military hazing, political slams, and workplace bullying, even in school bullying now. Heck, kids today now carry knives and guns. I never thought I would see this during my lifetime.

The effects of this are social isolation, constant criticism to the point of believing what your tormentors are saying to and about you (Stockholm Syndrome), the lies and rumors become true to you. You loose sight of who and what you are. For example, in some sick way my father thought that beating me, and locking me in a closet were going to make me a straight woman. Boy was he wrong.

that's really sad, andrew. i'm sorry. you are correct, no one deserves that kind of abuse either.
The end result can be more isolation, loneliness, depression, anxiety, low self-esteem, and even suicide. And nobody deserves that. Nobody.

I take meds on a reg. basis. I also have some ticks. All are doable. Life is good. But when someone threatens me with criticism, or demons, it sends me right over the edge. I also find it quite rude when someone bad mouths my late sister and late younger brother. They are not here to defend themselves. I can only do the best I can. I think until you yourself bury your own siblings, you have no room to talk.

constructive criticism is one thing to learn from, but not the kind attacking who you are, or 'misperceptions' of who you are/what you are doing wrong. open-discourse is always a desirable option to me - to agree to disagree !


Kimbo,

I was diagnosed very early with my learning disabilities thanks to my oldest sister. I failed in school. In fact, I failed anything that was organized. It made no sense to me. I also am colorblind. I would make an appt with a neurologist, and also have testing done by a therapist. See what the results come out to be. Mine were pretty much the same as Apoc.

I wish you peace.

Andrew

[violaine]

[QUOTE=Liam;58262]I was told that I was, "damaged goods," I think they were inferring that.

liam,

hi there friend

interesting choices for us are the phrases 'damaged goods', and 'mental deficit' -



beyond careless

[violaine]

[QUOTE=Kimbo;57798][COLOR=black][FONT=Verdana][COLOR=teal]
I don’t mind taking meds if needed but I need to know that I am taking the right meds for what is going on in my head—taking meds normally given to treat people with bipolar for my night sweats just doesn’t seem right. Due to past health issues I am unable to take any HRT but I see the impact of my hormones on my ADD and really I am wondering if there isn’t something deeper in my brain that should be evaluated. When I spoke with my Dr about this her response was—call your insurance company and see what they say. That response was quite frustrating to me.

I’m very curious as to how you all came about your diagnosis.

And the apologizing thing---oy vey! Raising my hand!



hallo dear kimbo!

i was diagnosed many years ago by an ASD expert in her field, and the medication i take has been wellbutrin xl 150 one time a day, forever. this one helps take the edge off anxiety. i'm drug [chemically] sensitive, and do not tolerate very meds in general.

hope you have a stellar weekend ~~> <~~ for your bella kitty

more links:

http://www.proedinc.com/customer/pro...?idCategory=11


http://autismbulletin.blogspot.com/2...better-on.html

http://www.enotalone.com/article/6866.html

This team generally includes a psychologist, neurologist, psychiatrist, speech therapist, and additional professionals who have expertise in diagnosing children with AS.

The comprehensive evaluation includes neurologic and genetic assessment, with in-depth cognitive and language testing to establish IQ and evaluate psychomotor function, verbal and non-verbal strengths and weaknesses, style of learning, and independent living skills. An assessment of communication strengths and weaknesses includes evaluating non-verbal forms of communication (gaze and gestures); the use of non-literal language (metaphor, irony, absurdities, and humor); patterns of inflection, stress and volume modulation; pragmatics (turn-taking and sensitivity to verbal cues); and the content, clarity, and coherence of conversation. The physician will look at the testing results and combine them with the child’s developmental history and current symptoms to make a diagnosis.

http://www.ninds.nih.gov/disorders/a...l_asperger.htm

*asperger syndrome is on a spectrum- not all of the behaviours will look the same/manifest in everyone * several of them kill me - like lack of empathy, and/or obsessions. i have interests, thank you

[Outlaw]

Originally Posted by Kimbo

[COLOR=black][FONT=Verdana][COLOR=teal].....I have lost much of my reading comprehension, my thought process is really garbled, I struggle communicating and keeping my head from going in circles and if I am tired, forget communication. This is really becoming an issue for me—and the frustration I feel trying to communicate just makes things worse and adds to my anxiety level. My retention of data is nonexistent and people often have to tell me things several times before it sticks in the ol’ gray matter. It feels like I am losing the battle. How did your diagnosis come about and by who, if I may ask?

I would encourage anyone who has medical/psychiatric/cognitive/neurological concerns to do some internet research on Lyme disease. Folks with Lyme are often misdiagnosed with a plethora of other diseases and syndromes that don't quite fit and therefore delay diagnosis and the onset of treatment. Lyme is often called the great imitator because upon initial consultation, it can present like MS, ALS, Depression/Anxiety/OCD, ADD, Fibro, Mono, Chronic Fatigue etc.

Keep an open mind, as most people with Lyme don't recall ever getting bit by a tic and as few as 35% report Lyme's "signature" bullseye rash. If the bull's-eye rash (erythema migrans) does appear, it can present years after getting bit and infected

Here are a few links to get you started: Lyme MD,
Canadian Lyme Fundation, and the NIH

There is a lot of information out there and it can be overwhelming, there is also a considerable amount of controversy around diagnosis and treatment. If I can be of any support in the process, or if you're interested in more information and inks I have found helpful, please PM me.

O

[Bit]

Hi Ruthie, welcome! Isn't taking that test amazing? I think that some people are highly sensitive, and some people are Aspies, and some people are both--there seems to be a lot of overlap, yanno?

Originally Posted by Andrew, Jr.

PSS: Apocalipstic, you are a doll too! It is in our DNA that we all share here. You, me, Belle, and I believe Bit is one of us too.

I'm highly sensitive, Andrew, and I have Fibromyalgia, but I haven't been diagnosed with Asperger's. There are some criteria that I don't fit for the diagnosis.

Originally Posted by apocalipstic

really???

I am not the only over-appologizer?

Really... as a matter of fact, I had apologized in advance to Gryph--for EVERYTHING, no matter what I might say or do, lol---just a couple days before I read your post.

Originally Posted by violaine

i would like to touch on why people apologise so often, please- if anyone cares to explore deeper the topic? is it due to [or more/other than] feeling like words will come out all wrong in general [once a certain point in conversation has been reached]- or due to not wanting to take up so much time of another person, upsetting someone or even yourself further, past experiences, et c

For me, it's more an emotional control kind of thing... when I get overwhelmed and frazzled I don't always have the control to avoid being cranky. I had it well under control for a long time, but once I couldn't take anti-inflammatories anymore it came back, so I think being in physical pain must contribute a lot to it.

Also, taking on the puppy has made it worse; he's a very demanding and overwhelming creature, testosterone-laden teenager that he is now... hm... now that I think about that, I'm most likely to get overwhelmed after a day when he's been misbehaving, especially if he's pulled really hard on the leash and my shoulders are sore.

Sometimes I misinterpret what Gryph says, but sometimes I just get so overwhelmed that I can't keep from.. um... well, let's be polite and call it "cranky griping." When I feel myself getting overwhelmed and I know that's coming on, I apologize to him in advance (for everything, a blanket apology!) so that he'll know not to take ANYTHING personally.

Originally Posted by Kimbo

Apocalipstic I am very curious about how you came about being diagnosed later in life. I have been really struggling for quite some time now...........my Dr again keeps wanting to prescribe meds for some of the pausal symptoms I am having but every time I do something like this is makes my head worse. I have lost much of my reading comprehension, my thought process is really garbled, I struggle communicating and keeping my head from going in circles and if I am tired, forget communication. This is really becoming an issue for me—and the frustration I feel trying to communicate just makes things worse and adds to my anxiety level. My retention of data is nonexistent and people often have to tell me things several times before it sticks in the ol’ gray matter. It feels like I am losing the battle..........

Kimbo, correct me if I'm wrong, but I thought you got diagnosed with Fibromyalgia a while back... do I remember that right?

The things you're describing are classic symptoms of Fibro brain fog; that sounds like a really bad Fibro flare (if that's what you have).

The classic treatment for brain fog is an SSRI like Prozac/Zoloft. It regulates your brain and the fog lifts. When I took Prozac for my Fibro, I started sleeping properly right away, my pain lessened, and my brain came back to normal for me--I felt like I was thinking sharply again for the first time in years--and my short term memory started working again.

If you don't have Fibro, I would urge you to see another doctor, a neurologist if you can.

Ooops, time for me to go offline, good night everyone!

[Andrew, Jr.]

For me, I have to focus on what task it is I am doing. If I get interrupted or side tracked by one of my furkids, I have to re-group. I cannot multi-task. No way no how.

Sometimes I say or use words that do not fit the dialogue going on. Then I get strange looks. Or I will be asked like what in the world is your problem? Are you a retard? What is your your problem? Sometimes they walk away from me, which I find very rude.

My bio-father always is insulting me. He just has no idea of how horrible his tongue is. For example, he belittles me for stuttering. Or if I have to repeat words in 3's he looks at me like I'm crazy. He just has no clue.

If I am in a social setting, and those who know of my disabilities, they tend to help me. I hang around them, and I try to listen for key words or jestures (face, hands). Online is so much harder.

Lyme Disease is something that we all should be checked for. I was many times. But I was also diagnosed when I was younger. Good thinking Outlaw.

[Kimbo]

Outlaw..Thanks for mentioning Lymes disease. It was a rheumatologist who diagnosed my Fibro. On initial visit she tested for lymes as well as a plethora of other possible things. I am neg for lymes.

Bit..yes I do have fibro, you are not mistaken. I've tried many of the drugs. I was diagnosed with fibro 12 years ago and as each of the meds were recommended I took them. I have had some ugly reactions to some of them..prozac about killed me. It is because of some of the reactions that I've had that I am very hesitant to try new drugs. Throughout the years my fibro has been for the most part controlled. I had one bad year where I had to take an extended leave from work due to fibro. I have bad days here and there but for the most part I feel that what is going on has gone beyond fibro fog.

[Apocalipstic]

Belle, Yes, I have been called stupid. Yeay. I am not stupid, just I communicate differently and sometimes oddly.

Kimbo, I hated Prozac too, Lexapro has worked best for me.

I can multitask, I have to at work. A lot. But it wears me out. I do get to pick my music and have dim lighting in the room and candles which really helps. Some days when I get home I am just empty. Cynthia has started putting the animals up for 30 minutes when I get home so I can just sit, because otherwise all 4 of them are all over me and I get all confused and overwhelmed even trying to put my work bag down.

Andrew, my father yelled at (and sometimes threatened) me for stuttering too. Now I have weird pauses in my speech during which people assume I have forgotten what I am saying, but really it is so I won't stutter.

[violaine]

dear jen,

i, too, get the pauses or locked verbally,, during communication with people - most awkward on the telephone with strangers [work related]. sometimes, the check out is not very amusing. probably due to feeling somewhat rushed. people are in line behind me while i'm fumbling- handling payment/transaction, & putting items back in purse, et c. if an employee comes over to say hallo, or talk to me, there's too much going on at once!