Important things I learned from past relationships

Quintease · 03-06-2012, 01:59 PM

I feel like I spend all my time on here focusing on my past bad relationships, whereas most of mine have been really good! Of course memories are always slightly tainted by breakups (which are never nice) but I always walk away with something valuable, no matter how awful the relationship.

I learned I had a beautiful voice and that I could sing from the first person I truly loved. I learned about dirty, kinky sex from another relationship which unfortunately turned dirty and nasty. I learned that organisation isn't that hard, from someone I admire to this day, and I learned that I can write from a relationship which left me broke

What important things have you learned which you can't now live without?

girl_dee · 03-06-2012, 03:24 PM

my need for kink!!! my first Sir taught me that

my love for doing bodywork, i was told i had a gift and i listened, i went to school for it and it's what i do today

my photography is decent and that i can actually sell pictures sometimes, i loved selling them at the resort and in town in Oregon and now online.

my first real love showed me that i am really queer, RIP Hazel

remembering the good stuff is important, i've had some good times in my life!

i am learning so much in my current relationship, which will never be a past relationship, that i could burst.

macele · 03-06-2012, 03:26 PM

i've always known the type of person that elevates who i am. but i wasn't lucky enough to keep her. she taught me the very thing this thread is about. she taught me to leave "the room" better than when i walked in "the door". she left me with a deeper meaning. she looked behind the blade of grass, ... it's never ending. life is about discovery.

i miss her, always will.

Sweet_Amor_Taino · 03-06-2012, 04:44 PM

I have expereince beautiful love. Nasty raw love making, Cold fish, truth and lies.

I also know that not all women are the same,there are great ladies in the world worthy of love and trust.

My quote
Do not tell me who you are.... show me.

deedarino · 03-06-2012, 07:09 PM

My past relationships have helped me to set my limits...what I want and what I need. And how to forgive.

Mr Nice Guy · 03-06-2012, 07:33 PM

My past relationships taught me about what I really want in a relationship. That's probably why I've been single for so long. I won't settle and I can wait forever if need be. I want the real thing that will last a long long time.

Gemme · 03-06-2012, 08:36 PM

I learned how to survive them.

Blade · 03-07-2012, 10:06 AM

No you can't change me and I can't change you. If either of us feels that the other needs to be changed, then probably we should just be friends.

Mr Nice Guy · 03-07-2012, 10:08 AM

To never take love for granted. Did that when I was young.

genghisfawn · 03-07-2012, 10:15 AM

I am a worthy person.

girl_dee · 03-07-2012, 10:21 AM

i am worthy, yes !

WolfyOne · 03-07-2012, 10:31 AM

With the last one, I've learned to open my eyes, so I can really hear with my ears

I'm relearning the independence I once had and lost being in a relationship

I'm still working on confidence and worthiness

Learning that being single the last 2 years was good for me as it helped me clean out cobwebs that have been there way too long

princessbelle · 03-07-2012, 10:24 AM

That our journey is important. The people that come into our lives are needed for us to become the best people we can be.

Even when it is tough and some relationships are not good, there are things we can learn from them to become better people.

Being able to stay friends with someone we care about says a lot about character.

That some of us are way better off as friends or acquaintances and should have never went down that "road". Move on, let go of mistakes and heartache, don't dwell on the negative people that come and go in our lives or the negative situations. Just be happy and be proud of who we are.

Learn from our mistakes, dust your boots off and never be afraid of loving again. When you least expect it, your true love can come a'callin. And you will realize the journey was worth it.

Amber2010 · 03-07-2012, 11:27 AM

Important things I learned from past relationships

Sometimes it is better to stay friends then let it go to the next level.

I will be fine with enough time to heal after a breakup.

The person who I was in a relationship in was important to me and always will be even if it is a bad break up.

Soft*Silver · 03-07-2012, 08:42 PM

I learned that I made someone else more important than myself and I drank over it. Wont do that again...however, I am ever so grateful for that Truth.

I learned I am unwilling to move across the country on uncertainties.

I learned I am stronger than I ever thought..and ended up doing things I didnt think I could handle.

I learned that I can love so well, and yet have loved so wrong. As Blade once said, my picker was broken and I needed to fix it.

I learned that I will never settle for being second in a relationship ever again.

I learned that I wont do exes in a relationship. Theirs or mine.

I learned that lies are obvious as long as I am not in denial.

I learned that no one can make me happy with myself but some sure can make me miserable about themselves...

Library_girl · 03-24-2012, 09:36 PM

I've learned that every relationship (and everyone) until now has been a dress rehearsal. And just as important.

I've learned that I'm stronger than I thought I was, and become stronger every day.

I've learned who my true friends are--the ones who can understand what you're saying on the phone even when you can't stop crying.

Epicpwn · 03-25-2012, 05:39 AM

The most important thing I have learned from past relationships is to never ignore the red flags. You have gut insticts for a reason.

DMW · 06-10-2012, 02:36 PM

Not to trust

Luv · 06-10-2012, 03:29 PM

That the 1st few months is the honeymoon stage but once u move in together true colors show

Not to trust

To listen to my head

To never make any decisions right after you get home from surgery and still have drugs in your system,,you make baaaad decisions and that sucks.

That they need to have a job and pull their share,,I hated being broke all the time and not appreciated.

Sachita · 06-26-2012, 12:17 PM

wow I've learned a whole lot. The most important is I learned who I am and what I don't want in a relationship. My friends and family tell me to just go for it, go meet someone, etc etc. But I already know what I'm looking for and in 10 minutes of conversation I'll pick up on that.

I've learned to be good to myself and not expect others to give me what I need. It's been a hard road coming to terms with the ending of a relationship dream and the truth is I might not ever get over it.

I've learned that its pointless to enrage in a power struggle. If the connection doesnt flow naturally then its best to walk away.

03-06-2012, 01:59 PM	#1
Quintease Member How Do You Identify?: Rainbow femme Preferred Pronoun?: princess Relationship Status: Married Join Date: Apr 2011 Location: United Kingdom Posts: 514 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 508 Thanked 1,816 Times in 417 Posts Rep Power: 10345577	Important things I learned from past relationships I feel like I spend all my time on here focusing on my past bad relationships, whereas most of mine have been really good! Of course memories are always slightly tainted by breakups (which are never nice) but I always walk away with something valuable, no matter how awful the relationship. I learned I had a beautiful voice and that I could sing from the first person I truly loved. I learned about dirty, kinky sex from another relationship which unfortunately turned dirty and nasty. I learned that organisation isn't that hard, from someone I admire to this day, and I learned that I can write from a relationship which left me broke What important things have you learned which you can't now live without? __________________ It is not worth an intelligent person's time to be in the majority. By definition, there are already enough people to do that.

03-06-2012, 04:44 PM	#4
Sweet_Amor_Taino Member How Do You Identify?: Butch Gentleman Preferred Pronoun?: he/him Relationship Status: Exclusively dating, Join Date: Dec 2009 Location: Austin Tx Posts: 538 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 388 Thanked 852 Times in 297 Posts Rep Power: 4397589	from the past I only bring the good to the present. I have expereince beautiful love. Nasty raw love making, Cold fish, truth and lies. I also know that not all women are the same,there are great ladies in the world worthy of love and trust. My quote Do not tell me who you are.... show me. __________________ When we are aware that each moment of each day and each step we take,is truly mystical and full of wonder,we will live our lives with greater thought and care, we will also respect and appreciate This moment.

03-06-2012, 07:09 PM	#5
deedarino Member How Do You Identify?: Femme Preferred Pronoun?: Woman Relationship Status: In recovery. Join Date: Feb 2012 Location: Oregon Posts: 632 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 3,518 Thanked 1,956 Times in 497 Posts Rep Power: 21474849	My past relationships have helped me to set my limits...what I want and what I need. And how to forgive. __________________ Squint your eyes and look closer. I'm not between you and your ambitions. I am a poster girl with no poster. I am thirty-two flavors and then some. And I'm beyond your peripheral vision, so you might want to turn your head~Ani I want to think again of dangerous and noble things; I want to be light and frolicsome; I want to be improbable, beautiful and afraid of nothing as if I had wings Mary Oliver

03-06-2012, 08:36 PM	#7
Gemme Practically Lives Here How Do You Identify?: Queer Stone Femme Girl of the Unicorn Variety Preferred Pronoun?: She, as in 'She's a GEM' Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: The roads are narrow here Posts: 36,587 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 182,179 Thanked 108,773 Times in 25,659 Posts Rep Power: 21474887	I learned how to survive them. __________________ Gemme's Journal I'm misunderestimated.

03-07-2012, 10:06 AM	#8
Blade Infamous Member How Do You Identify?: TG Preferred Pronoun?: He Relationship Status: once in a while someone amazing comes along...and here I am! Join Date: Jan 2010 Location: Down on the farm Posts: 5,492 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 9,850 Thanked 14,400 Times in 4,049 Posts Rep Power: 21474856	No you can't change me and I can't change you. If either of us feels that the other needs to be changed, then probably we should just be friends. __________________ Yeah so what if I'm triple dipped in awesome sauce? The best way to predict the future, is to create it.

03-06-2012, 03:24 PM	#2
girl_dee Practically Lives Here How Do You Identify?: Femme Preferred Pronoun?: dee Relationship Status: Hitched up Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Livin’ the Dream Posts: 24,079 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 30,560 Thanked 54,956 Times in 13,922 Posts Rep Power: 21474873	my need for kink!!! my first Sir taught me that my love for doing bodywork, i was told i had a gift and i listened, i went to school for it and it's what i do today my photography is decent and that i can actually sell pictures sometimes, i loved selling them at the resort and in town in Oregon and now online. my first real love showed me that i am really queer, RIP Hazel remembering the good stuff is important, i've had some good times in my life! i am learning so much in my current relationship, which will never be a past relationship, that i could burst.

03-06-2012, 03:26 PM	#3
macele Member How Do You Identify?: a bold-assed maximus Preferred Pronoun?: she Join Date: Sep 2011 Location: mississippi Posts: 1,066 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 3,178 Thanked 3,239 Times in 849 Posts Rep Power: 21474849	i've always known the type of person that elevates who i am. but i wasn't lucky enough to keep her. she taught me the very thing this thread is about. she taught me to leave "the room" better than when i walked in "the door". she left me with a deeper meaning. she looked behind the blade of grass, ... it's never ending. life is about discovery. i miss her, always will.

03-06-2012, 07:33 PM	#6
Mr Nice Guy Timed Out How Do You Identify?: Kind, sweet, loving, romantic and a rare Butch. :) Relationship Status: I don't drive a Uhaul. :) Join Date: May 2011 Location: Another New Englander Posts: 1,768 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 2,035 Thanked 4,894 Times in 1,307 Posts Rep Power: 0	My past relationships taught me about what I really want in a relationship. That's probably why I've been single for so long. I won't settle and I can wait forever if need be. I want the real thing that will last a long long time.

03-07-2012, 10:08 AM	#9
Mr Nice Guy Timed Out How Do You Identify?: Kind, sweet, loving, romantic and a rare Butch. :) Relationship Status: I don't drive a Uhaul. :) Join Date: May 2011 Location: Another New Englander Posts: 1,768 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 2,035 Thanked 4,894 Times in 1,307 Posts Rep Power: 0	To never take love for granted. Did that when I was young.

03-07-2012, 10:15 AM	#10
genghisfawn Member How Do You Identify?: Femme/Gentlewoman Preferred Pronoun?: She/her Relationship Status: Happily married 05/17/14 Join Date: Jan 2012 Location: Saskatchewan, Canada Posts: 561 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 2,056 Thanked 2,157 Times in 403 Posts Rep Power: 21474849	I am a worthy person.

03-07-2012, 10:21 AM	#11
girl_dee Practically Lives Here How Do You Identify?: Femme Preferred Pronoun?: dee Relationship Status: Hitched up Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Livin’ the Dream Posts: 24,079 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 30,560 Thanked 54,956 Times in 13,922 Posts Rep Power: 21474873	i am worthy, yes !

03-07-2012, 10:31 AM	#12
WolfyOne Magically Delicious How Do You Identify?: Gentle Butch Relationship Status: Single and content Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Minnesota Posts: 6,558 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 22,052 Thanked 15,407 Times in 4,139 Posts Rep Power: 21474857	With the last one, I've learned to open my eyes, so I can really hear with my ears I'm relearning the independence I once had and lost being in a relationship I'm still working on confidence and worthiness Learning that being single the last 2 years was good for me as it helped me clean out cobwebs that have been there way too long __________________ Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength; loving someone deeply gives you courage --- Lao Tzo

03-07-2012, 10:24 AM	#13
princessbelle Infamous Member How Do You Identify?: femme Preferred Pronoun?: femme ones Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Tennessee Posts: 6,100 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 29,380 Thanked 30,503 Times in 5,201 Posts Rep Power: 21474857	That our journey is important. The people that come into our lives are needed for us to become the best people we can be. Even when it is tough and some relationships are not good, there are things we can learn from them to become better people. Being able to stay friends with someone we care about says a lot about character. That some of us are way better off as friends or acquaintances and should have never went down that "road". Move on, let go of mistakes and heartache, don't dwell on the negative people that come and go in our lives or the negative situations. Just be happy and be proud of who we are. Learn from our mistakes, dust your boots off and never be afraid of loving again. When you least expect it, your true love can come a'callin. And you will realize the journey was worth it. __________________ ~ I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel. ~ Maya Angelou

03-07-2012, 11:27 AM	#14
Amber2010 Member How Do You Identify?: Happy, Crazy, Bubbly, Funny, Strong, Outgoing, Friendly Preferred Pronoun?: Femme Relationship Status: Complicated Join Date: Jun 2011 Location: Florida Posts: 200 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 920 Thanked 594 Times in 154 Posts Rep Power: 3787183	Important things I learned from past relationships Sometimes it is better to stay friends then let it go to the next level. I will be fine with enough time to heal after a breakup. The person who I was in a relationship in was important to me and always will be even if it is a bad break up.

03-07-2012, 08:42 PM	#15
SoftSilver Infamous Member How Do You Identify?: femme Preferred Pronoun?: she Relationship Status: Married Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: rose cottage Posts: 5,502 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 8,428 Thanked 15,619 Times in 3,976 Posts Rep Power*: 21474856	I learned that I made someone else more important than myself and I drank over it. Wont do that again...however, I am ever so grateful for that Truth. I learned I am unwilling to move across the country on uncertainties. I learned I am stronger than I ever thought..and ended up doing things I didnt think I could handle. I learned that I can love so well, and yet have loved so wrong. As Blade once said, my picker was broken and I needed to fix it. I learned that I will never settle for being second in a relationship ever again. I learned that I wont do exes in a relationship. Theirs or mine. I learned that lies are obvious as long as I am not in denial. I learned that no one can make me happy with myself but some sure can make me miserable about themselves... __________________ Pole bachit, a lis chuye. The field sees, the forest hears

03-24-2012, 09:36 PM	#16
Library_girl Member How Do You Identify?: Old School Femme, girl, babygirl Preferred Pronoun?: she, her, & other girly words Relationship Status: Married to DJ Bear Join Date: Aug 2011 Location: Happily married in Nevada Posts: 378 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 1,113 Thanked 1,247 Times in 280 Posts Rep Power: 13864638	I've learned that every relationship (and everyone) until now has been a dress rehearsal. And just as important. I've learned that I'm stronger than I thought I was, and become stronger every day. I've learned who my true friends are--the ones who can understand what you're saying on the phone even when you can't stop crying. __________________

03-25-2012, 05:39 AM	#17
Epicpwn Junior Member How Do You Identify?: Male Preferred Pronoun?: He/Him Relationship Status: In One Join Date: May 2010 Location: Texas Posts: 16 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 5 Thanked 24 Times in 8 Posts Rep Power: 16	The most important thing I have learned from past relationships is to never ignore the red flags. You have gut insticts for a reason. __________________ I can and will be just fine.

06-10-2012, 02:36 PM	#18
DMW Member How Do You Identify?: FTM/Male (Will 14) Relationship Status: Caught An Angel and she doesn't lie! Join Date: May 2012 Location: @ Posts: 784 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 2,256 Thanked 1,861 Times in 614 Posts Rep Power: 21474848	Not to trust

06-10-2012, 03:29 PM	#19
Luv Member How Do You Identify?: .... Relationship Status: .. Join Date: Mar 2010 Location: ..... Posts: 753 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 1,199 Thanked 1,216 Times in 366 Posts Rep Power: 12334991	That the 1st few months is the honeymoon stage but once u move in together true colors show Not to trust To listen to my head To never make any decisions right after you get home from surgery and still have drugs in your system,,you make baaaad decisions and that sucks. That they need to have a job and pull their share,,I hated being broke all the time and not appreciated.

06-26-2012, 12:17 PM	#20
Sachita Senior Member How Do You Identify?: Alpha Femme Preferred Pronoun?: Goddess Relationship Status: Completely in love Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Southern Virginia Posts: 3,225 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 2,564 Thanked 8,994 Times in 2,249 Posts Rep Power: 21474854	wow I've learned a whole lot. The most important is I learned who I am and what I don't want in a relationship. My friends and family tell me to just go for it, go meet someone, etc etc. But I already know what I'm looking for and in 10 minutes of conversation I'll pick up on that. I've learned to be good to myself and not expect others to give me what I need. It's been a hard road coming to terms with the ending of a relationship dream and the truth is I might not ever get over it. I've learned that its pointless to enrage in a power struggle. If the connection doesnt flow naturally then its best to walk away. __________________ You either like me or you don't. It took me Twenty-something years to learn how to love myself, I don't have that kinda time to convince somebody else. ~ Daniel Franzese