What Cracked You Up Today? - Page 44

jac · 04-16-2013, 07:05 AM

Yes it was conversation with myself inside my head.....

me: damn this new shampoo smells great *sniffs open bottle*
me: *squirts shampoo in my hand* It's such a dark green
me: whaaaaaat the hell? *scrubs in hair and feels granules of something"
me: oh fuck I bet a bought facial scrub!!
me: oh well my hair feels great after this rinse
me: *reads the bottle* ahahahaaaaaaaaaa it's shampoo with granules in it for a deep cleansing
us: score!!!

cinnamongrrl · 04-17-2013, 07:20 AM

Our gigantic cat, Bud, trying to fit his big ol' self (17lbs!!) into the tiny opening left when I didn't close the dresser drawer all the way....lol

wahya · 04-17-2013, 08:29 AM

Well A friend told me this..Had to share.

Him: I am so glad that I have the day off from work because of the Holiday
Out of state friend : Oh yeah ? I didn't know there was a Holiday today, What holiday is it?
Him: It's Patriots Day! it's a state holiday.
Out of state friend : Wow! Cool! That's awesome you all have a holiday for your football team!

The funny thing about this to me was the out of state friend was from my home state. lol

Bèsame* · 04-17-2013, 08:47 AM

It cracked us both up. A conversation with a customer yesterday..

Her..last time I came in you all gave me good luck when I went to Vegas. I came home with money. So I'm hoping I get luck today.
Me..good! I hope you do! Your going again?
Her...yes, to a * mythology* convention.
Me..oh that sounds interesting. Do some people dress up ? ( me, thinking of Star Wars, Star Trek conventions)
Her...( strange look on her face)...dress up like a kidney?
Me...oh...I thought you said mythology .
Her...no...nephrology, kidney specialization .
Us...laughing
Her...but mythology would be more fun!

StrongButch · 04-17-2013, 05:35 PM

I crack myself up! But dont worry folks I dont talk to myself and answer. (lol)

jac · 04-17-2013, 06:33 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by StrongButch

I crack myself up! But dont worry folks I dont talk to myself and answer. (lol)

I do!!

See post above ^^^^

StrongButch · 04-25-2013, 08:45 AM

Climbing trees like im still a kid! I quess its true what they say the older you get the more risks your willing to take. (lol)

StrongButch · 04-27-2013, 07:53 AM

My buddy called me said listen to this song Mr Know it all-Kelly Clarkson. I sent this song to my ex because she thought she knew it all!(lol) Hy sang the song too but said Ms. Kyle is a nut !

maryam · 04-30-2013, 06:58 PM

So I have some asparagus soaking in ice water, 'cause I'm going to steam some with dinner. One of my super rotten kitties, just ZOOOMED across the table, snagged a spear of asparagus on the way past and shot up to the top of the kitty tower, where she proceeded to beat the poor thing into submission.

jac · 04-30-2013, 07:01 PM

More Kid Wisdom....

"If I was a girl I swear I would stand in front of the mirror and stare at my boobs all day long!"

OMG I 'bout fell out of my chair laughing so hard...
He on the otherhand had a dead pan look on his face!

Reason #5893453 as to why I freakin' love my job!!

Mopsie · 04-30-2013, 07:19 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by maryam

So I have some asparagus soaking in ice water, 'cause I'm going to steam some with dinner. One of my super rotten kitties, just ZOOOMED across the table, snagged a spear of asparagus on the way past and shot up to the top of the kitty tower, where she proceeded to beat the poor thing into submission.

That sucked for your dinner but really made me laugh!

maryam · 05-01-2013, 11:10 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mopsie

That sucked for your dinner but really made me laugh!

She worked so hard for it that I let her keep it. I did rewash the rest of it though.

MissItalianDiva · 05-01-2013, 11:23 AM

Reminding myself that actions speak louder then words....lol got a good reminder and chuckle from this.

Miss Scarlett · 05-03-2013, 04:16 PM

BDP's description of work today - "I was running around like a head with its chicken cut off!"

Blade · 05-03-2013, 04:45 PM

It has been cool and damp here in NC for the past 2 weeks. We have had a few days in the low 70's, but for the most part in the low 60's. It was in the low 60's today and breezy and it was gusty between the buildings as my boss and I took a Cushman ride to the nurses office. We were joking back and forth about the nurses need to see me. Out of the blue he says, damn it's chilly, I'm not sure if we suddenly sprung into October or if we fell back into March.

For some reason that struck my funny bone, I got a good laugh out of it and as the day went on I several of my coworkers thought it was funny as well.

I'm not sure if we suddenly sprung into October or if we fell back into March

jac · 05-03-2013, 07:39 PM

What cracked me up today, you ask?

The staff huddled around my computer monitor and the topic of discussion being - passive agressive and how come it cannot be aggressive passive.

When you have five women standing around at the end of the day mocking possible "agressive passive" mannerisms all you can do is smirk, sip your coolatta and keep typing.... because really and truly deep down inside you just wanna laugh and point

and join in the fun... but you're the only one left actually working!!

It was a super fun way to end the day!!

Ascot · 05-03-2013, 09:18 PM

A femme friend who is ordinarily quite proper is currently quite medicated, having had surgery a few days ago. Today, she used the word "snatch". That cracked me up.

Blade · 05-06-2013, 08:47 PM

A text conversation

Me...How is the Christmas Elf? Don't you want a few more?

LBH...She's better, when she quit having fever, the rash went away and she hasn't had anymore seizures.

Me...Praise the Lord! That's great!

LBH...Yeah, but I tell ya, she took 5 yrs off my life

Me...chuckling...honey she is only 2. She will take 5 yrs off your life many more times before she is grown, so you better figure out a way to make those increments narrower. Like maybe 1 or 2 yrs off your life at the time.

LBH...HUH?

Chuckles...she has a genius level IQ and no common sense...it went right over her head.

puddin' · 05-10-2013, 02:50 PM

a resident who neva jokes "pullin' my leg". it was hysterical once i got what he was doin'...

jac · 05-14-2013, 06:08 PM

The look on folks' faces

around town this morning because I had a mug in one hand a cup in the other and a bottle of water in my back pocket.

What???? Okay okay I may possibly have a drinking problem these days.

04-16-2013, 07:05 AM	#861
jac Timed Out - Permanent How Do You Identify?: butch stone Preferred Pronoun?: masculine ones work best... Relationship Status: ♥ engaged to spritz ♥ Join Date: Oct 2011 Location: bangor, maine Posts: 3,344 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 20,720 Thanked 16,492 Times in 2,972 Posts Rep Power: 0	Inner dialogue.... Yes it was conversation with myself inside my head..... me: damn this new shampoo smells great sniffs open bottle me: squirts shampoo in my hand It's such a dark green me: whaaaaaat the hell? scrubs in hair and feels granules of something" me: oh fuck I bet a bought facial scrub!! me: oh well my hair feels great after this rinse me: reads the bottle* ahahahaaaaaaaaaa it's shampoo with granules in it for a deep cleansing us: score!!!

04-17-2013, 08:47 AM	#864
Bèsame* Practically Lives Here How Do You Identify?: Femm Preferred Pronoun?: She Relationship Status: ☀️☀️☀️ Join Date: Sep 2012 Location: Closer to the waves Posts: 14,779 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 28,405 Thanked 39,544 Times in 10,211 Posts Rep Power: 21474862	It cracked us both up. A conversation with a customer yesterday.. Her..last time I came in you all gave me good luck when I went to Vegas. I came home with money. So I'm hoping I get luck today. Me..good! I hope you do! Your going again? Her...yes, to a * mythology* convention. Me..oh that sounds interesting. Do some people dress up ? ( me, thinking of Star Wars, Star Trek conventions) Her...( strange look on her face)...dress up like a kidney? Me...oh...I thought you said mythology . Her...no...nephrology, kidney specialization . Us...laughing Her...but mythology would be more fun! __________________ kisses A kiss is a whisper in your mouth. Can I borrow a kiss? I promise to give it back.

04-17-2013, 05:35 PM	#865
StrongButch Member How Do You Identify?: I see the world thru a lens Preferred Pronoun?: Yes Boss Relationship Status: Chillin out with awesome women Join Date: Jan 2010 Location: San Francisco Posts: 1,376 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 4,018 Thanked 4,185 Times in 1,179 Posts Rep Power: 21474852	Cracked you up I crack myself up! But dont worry folks I dont talk to myself and answer. (lol) __________________ Life is like music,so it can be played in many different styles.

04-25-2013, 08:45 AM	#867
StrongButch Member How Do You Identify?: I see the world thru a lens Preferred Pronoun?: Yes Boss Relationship Status: Chillin out with awesome women Join Date: Jan 2010 Location: San Francisco Posts: 1,376 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 4,018 Thanked 4,185 Times in 1,179 Posts Rep Power: 21474852	Cracked you up Climbing trees like im still a kid! I quess its true what they say the older you get the more risks your willing to take. (lol) __________________ Life is like music,so it can be played in many different styles.

04-27-2013, 07:53 AM	#868
StrongButch Member How Do You Identify?: I see the world thru a lens Preferred Pronoun?: Yes Boss Relationship Status: Chillin out with awesome women Join Date: Jan 2010 Location: San Francisco Posts: 1,376 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 4,018 Thanked 4,185 Times in 1,179 Posts Rep Power: 21474852	Cracked you up My buddy called me said listen to this song Mr Know it all-Kelly Clarkson. I sent this song to my ex because she thought she knew it all!(lol) Hy sang the song too but said Ms. Kyle is a nut ! __________________ Life is like music,so it can be played in many different styles.

04-17-2013, 07:20 AM	#862
cinnamongrrl Infamous Member How Do You Identify?: cleverly disguised as a responsible adult* Preferred Pronoun?: wild woman Relationship Status: No, thank you. Join Date: Feb 2010 Location: in my heart I'm going to Carolina...but I'm in MA for now Posts: 7,573 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 14,877 Thanked 27,391 Times in 6,872 Posts Rep Power: 21474858	Our gigantic cat, Bud, trying to fit his big ol' self (17lbs!!) into the tiny opening left when I didn't close the dresser drawer all the way....lol

04-17-2013, 08:29 AM	#863
wahya Timed Out How Do You Identify?: Me Preferred Pronoun?: Me Relationship Status: im good Join Date: Mar 2013 Location: Massachusetts Posts: 296 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 506 Thanked 857 Times in 240 Posts Rep Power: 0	Well A friend told me this..Had to share. Him: I am so glad that I have the day off from work because of the Holiday Out of state friend : Oh yeah ? I didn't know there was a Holiday today, What holiday is it? Him: It's Patriots Day! it's a state holiday. Out of state friend : Wow! Cool! That's awesome you all have a holiday for your football team! The funny thing about this to me was the out of state friend was from my home state. lol

04-30-2013, 06:58 PM	#869
maryam Member How Do You Identify?: femme-ish Preferred Pronoun?: she Relationship Status: taken Join Date: Jan 2013 Location: somewhere, out there.... Posts: 263 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 675 Thanked 795 Times in 231 Posts Rep Power: 4979163	So I have some asparagus soaking in ice water, 'cause I'm going to steam some with dinner. One of my super rotten kitties, just ZOOOMED across the table, snagged a spear of asparagus on the way past and shot up to the top of the kitty tower, where she proceeded to beat the poor thing into submission.

04-30-2013, 07:01 PM	#870
jac Timed Out - Permanent How Do You Identify?: butch stone Preferred Pronoun?: masculine ones work best... Relationship Status: ♥ engaged to spritz ♥ Join Date: Oct 2011 Location: bangor, maine Posts: 3,344 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 20,720 Thanked 16,492 Times in 2,972 Posts Rep Power: 0	More Kid Wisdom.... "If I was a girl I swear I would stand in front of the mirror and stare at my boobs all day long!" OMG I 'bout fell out of my chair laughing so hard... He on the otherhand had a dead pan look on his face! Reason #5893453 as to why I freakin' love my job!!

05-01-2013, 11:23 AM	#873
MissItalianDiva Senior Member How Do You Identify?: Miss Twiggy Preferred Pronoun?: Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious and that shit doesn't sound atrocious! Relationship Status: divorce happens..all that glitters ain't gold Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: SLC Utah Posts: 2,284 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 2,768 Thanked 7,161 Times in 1,793 Posts Rep Power: 21474853	Reminding myself that actions speak louder then words....lol got a good reminder and chuckle from this.

05-03-2013, 04:16 PM	#874
Miss Scarlett Infamous Member How Do You Identify?: Femme Relationship Status: . Join Date: Feb 2010 Location: . Posts: 5,530 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 4,478 Thanked 12,949 Times in 3,419 Posts Rep Power: 21474856	BDP's description of work today - "I was running around like a head with its chicken cut off!"

05-03-2013, 04:45 PM	#875
Blade Infamous Member How Do You Identify?: TG Preferred Pronoun?: He Relationship Status: once in a while someone amazing comes along...and here I am! Join Date: Jan 2010 Location: Down on the farm Posts: 5,492 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 9,850 Thanked 14,400 Times in 4,049 Posts Rep Power: 21474856	It has been cool and damp here in NC for the past 2 weeks. We have had a few days in the low 70's, but for the most part in the low 60's. It was in the low 60's today and breezy and it was gusty between the buildings as my boss and I took a Cushman ride to the nurses office. We were joking back and forth about the nurses need to see me. Out of the blue he says, damn it's chilly, I'm not sure if we suddenly sprung into October or if we fell back into March. For some reason that struck my funny bone, I got a good laugh out of it and as the day went on I several of my coworkers thought it was funny as well. I'm not sure if we suddenly sprung into October or if we fell back into March __________________ Yeah so what if I'm triple dipped in awesome sauce? The best way to predict the future, is to create it.

05-03-2013, 07:39 PM	#876
jac Timed Out - Permanent How Do You Identify?: butch stone Preferred Pronoun?: masculine ones work best... Relationship Status: ♥ engaged to spritz ♥ Join Date: Oct 2011 Location: bangor, maine Posts: 3,344 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 20,720 Thanked 16,492 Times in 2,972 Posts Rep Power: 0	What cracked me up today, you ask? The staff huddled around my computer monitor and the topic of discussion being - passive agressive and how come it cannot be aggressive passive. When you have five women standing around at the end of the day mocking possible "agressive passive" mannerisms all you can do is smirk, sip your coolatta and keep typing.... because really and truly deep down inside you just wanna laugh and point and join in the fun... but you're the only one left actually working!! It was a super fun way to end the day!!

05-03-2013, 09:18 PM	#877
Ascot Member How Do You Identify?: Preppy Butch artist Relationship Status: She’s wild about me. Join Date: Aug 2012 Location: North of the Emerald City Posts: 1,135 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 179 Thanked 2,487 Times in 549 Posts Rep Power: 21474849	A femme friend who is ordinarily quite proper is currently quite medicated, having had surgery a few days ago. Today, she used the word "snatch". That cracked me up. __________________ Now, if I could just find a way to get paid for what I can do with my tongue and a cherry stem.

05-06-2013, 08:47 PM	#878
Blade Infamous Member How Do You Identify?: TG Preferred Pronoun?: He Relationship Status: once in a while someone amazing comes along...and here I am! Join Date: Jan 2010 Location: Down on the farm Posts: 5,492 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 9,850 Thanked 14,400 Times in 4,049 Posts Rep Power: 21474856	The joys of motherhood A text conversation Me...How is the Christmas Elf? Don't you want a few more? LBH...She's better, when she quit having fever, the rash went away and she hasn't had anymore seizures. Me...Praise the Lord! That's great! LBH...Yeah, but I tell ya, she took 5 yrs off my life Me...chuckling...honey she is only 2. She will take 5 yrs off your life many more times before she is grown, so you better figure out a way to make those increments narrower. Like maybe 1 or 2 yrs off your life at the time. LBH...HUH? Chuckles...she has a genius level IQ and no common sense...it went right over her head. __________________ Yeah so what if I'm triple dipped in awesome sauce? The best way to predict the future, is to create it.

05-10-2013, 02:50 PM	#879
puddin' Infamous Member How Do You Identify?: a genderqueer nuisance Preferred Pronoun?: bitchboi Join Date: Aug 2011 Location: new zealand Posts: 7,120 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 9,467 Thanked 7,973 Times in 2,344 Posts Rep Power: 21474856	a resident who neva jokes "pullin' my leg". it was hysterical once i got what he was doin'... __________________ be true, be you, be brave.

05-14-2013, 06:08 PM	#880
jac Timed Out - Permanent How Do You Identify?: butch stone Preferred Pronoun?: masculine ones work best... Relationship Status: ♥ engaged to spritz ♥ Join Date: Oct 2011 Location: bangor, maine Posts: 3,344 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 20,720 Thanked 16,492 Times in 2,972 Posts Rep Power: 0	The look on folks' faces around town this morning because I had a mug in one hand a cup in the other and a bottle of water in my back pocket. What???? Okay okay I may possibly have a drinking problem these days.