Some labels do not include trans in the definition

[Kobi]

Originally Posted by apretty

and what if your 'vibes' are dead wrong--you choose someone else's GENDER based on some *feeling*?

what if i feel like you're a man--should i start he'ing you and 'go with it'?

do you see how this isn't at all your choice to make--how this is all contained within a person--no matter if you never came across someone and 'vibed' their gender/pronoun?

Having read and reread Sachita's post several times, it seems to me the totality of what was said is not being acknowledged. Rather a few concepts are being taken out of context.

I did not see her say anywhere that she would be disrespectful and deny someone else's identity. I saw her say she has an internal process....we all do....and maybe what she perceives in that process is not what is being stated by another.

We all get vibes about people. Sometimes we are correct, sometimes not. But to say one cannot have an internal process or a feeling about something is to deny their right to be human.

No one is "choosing" anothers gender or preferred pronoun. Sometimes you dont know and an automatic process is to use what you feel. Seems reasonable to me. Then the other person can state a preference in response. No harm, no foul.

Gawd, if I have to police everything that I think or feel or intuit cuz someone else takes issue with a tiny aspect of MY process, I'd be a freakin basketcase. We wont need to worry about the gender police but we'd have a real problem with the thought police.